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Masturbation Monday: “Through a Crack in the Door…”

The house is quiet. At first, I think there’s no-one home. He must have gone out to work. But then, at the end of the corridor, I notice the bedroom light on. The door is slightly ajar.

A picture of Edge Ecstatic, a naked white man damp from the shower, pictured from hips to shoulders.I shut the from door silently behind me, grinning to myself, knowing what my husband must be up to. I creep down the hall towards the bedroom.

Through the slightly open door, I have the perfect view of the bed – and the perfect view of him. He’s lying on his back in all his gorgeous, naked glory, eyes closed, right hand slowly stroking up and down his erect cock. I love watching him play with himself. I love the completely different way it lets me see his pleasure and his body. But somehow it’s even hotter when he doesn’t know I’m watching. It’s so natural. So… un-staged.

I watch his chest move up and down as his breathing quickens in time with the hand jerking his cock. A little gasp escapes from his lips. A drop of pre-come beads on the end of his shaft and slowly trickles out.

He’s close now. I can tell by the way his grip tightens, his hand moving faster and faster. I realise that I am holding my breath, and that my own cock is rock solid beneath my jeans. His hips are lifting up off the bed, thrusting his cock into his own hand the way he does into mine when I wank him off.

He groans loudly as he reaches his climax. Come splashes onto his stomach. I am overcome with the desire to crawl onto the bed beside him and lick it from his sweat-damp skin. Instead, I back away without making a sound, back down the hall towards the door. I wait a few seconds, then open the door and slam it loudly.

“Hi honey! Are you home?”

Masturbation Monday is created and owned by Kayla Lords. Click the logo to see what’s getting everyone off this week.

If you enjoyed this story, you can get bonus erotic fiction with #BonusSmutTuesday, every single week by signing up to my Patreon page at any level.

Image is of the gorgeous EdgeEcstatic.

[Toy Review] Lovehoney Hummer Penis Masturbator Wand Attachment

There are things that are a given when it comes to “being in a relationship with Amy”. You must have coffee in the house. I will make puns at you. And now, it seems, I will ask you to put strange things on your genitals so that I can overshare about it on the internet.

Thankfully, my stunt cock Mr CK is a good sport, so he agreed to try out the Hummer wand attachment so I could bring this review to you all.

The Hummer clear male masturbator wand attachment sitting on my laptop.

A note about terms: this toy is listed as “male masturbator attachment”. However, I have chosen to use the language of “penis masturbator,” because not everyone with a penis is a man and not all men have penises! I would like to invite all sex writers and sex-positive retailers to consider their language in this area and not ascribe genders to body parts unnecessarily.

With That Out of the Way, Let’s Take a Closer Look at the Hummer…

The Hummer penis masturbator wand attachment on the Lovehoney Classic Wand on a white sheet.The Hummer is a wand attachment for people with penises. It’s essentially a tube, lined with ridges and little nodules. You put it over the head of your wand and insert your penis into the tube, which then transmits vibrations all along your shaft.

It will fit the majority of wand vibrators. We used it with my Lovehoney Classic Wand and it was perfect, but it will also fit the Magic Wand Original, Doxy Original or Die Cast, and most standard-sized wands. The circumference is 7 inches, and it’s very stretchy.

Materials, Care and Cleaning

This attachment is made of TPE (thermoplastic elastomer). TPE is technically considered non-toxic in that it doesn’t contain harmful plasticisers like phthalates, but it is porous. This means it will harbour mold and bacteria, can only be cleaned at surface level, and cannot ever be fully sterilised. The material is also unstable and WILL break down over time.

Unfortunately, the vast majority of penis masturbators are made of TPE. At time of writing, I have only been able to find one wand attachment for penises made of silicone. (Know others? Let us know in the comments!)

I’m less against TPE for penis toys than I am for insertable toys, simply because the outer skin of the penis is much less likely to pick up an infection than a mucous membrane such as the inside of the vagina or anus. However, I still advise approaching TPE products with caution and always choosing silicone instead where options exist.

If you get a TPE wand topper or masturbator like this one, you should clean it with gentle soap and warm water (do not boil) and allow it to dry thoroughly, and check it for mold/black spots/damage to the material before every use. With infrequent use, it might last a year. If you’re using it more often, though, I recommend replacing every 3-6 months. You can probably extend its life slightly by using a condom, but ultimately this is a product that simply won’t last. TPE sex toys should DEFINITELY not be shared.

Our Experience

In terms of experience, this one was an absolute hit with Mr CK. We used it after having penetrative sex for a while, so he was already quite turned on.

Mr CK is on the larger-than-average side, as cocks go, and I did initially look at the size of the tube on the Hummer and go “LOL NO that’s not gonna fit”. However, the Hummer is super stretchy and so, with a very generous helping of lube, he slid into it comfortably. The material is quite grabby, so regardless of penis size I recommend with this attachment. Water-based in best for TPE toys.

I switched on the wand and I was immediately impressed with the strength of his reaction. People often forget that vibrators are not just for vulvas! Lots of penis owners seriously get off with vibrations, and a tube-style wand attachment like this one is a great way to distribute vibrations evenly along and around the shaft of the penis.

Suffice to say he came very hard and very fast. In terms of user experience at least, we declared this one a winner.

“Surprisingly effective!” – Mr CK

“Felt like a wrap-around Doxy!” – Mr CK

So Do We Recommend It?

Mixed.

I’m really loathe to wholeheartedly endorse a TPE toy. I really, really want someone to create a version of this made of silicone. That said, we really enjoyed using it and it gave my partner an amazing orgasm.

If you’re willing to replace it every few months, have at it. If you want something that’ll last you forever, this unfortunately isn’t it.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the Hummer and a collection of other wand attachments for review. Check out the wand attachments tag for all reviews in this series. If you buy using my affiliate links in this post, I make a small commission. All views are, and will always be, my own. Pictures are by me and not for use without express permission.

[Toy Review] Wand Essentials Nuzzle Tip Wand Attachment

This is the second in a serious of wand attachment reviews. I’m always getting asked about the best attachments for wand vibrators, so I thought it’s past time I tried some out and let y’all know what I thought. Because putting strange things on my genitals for science is what I do.

Up today: the Nuzzle Tip wand attachment by Wand Essentials.

The Important Stuff

The Wand Essentials Nuzzle Tip attachment on the Lovehoney Classic Wand, lying on a white sheet.
Also feat. Lovehoney Classic Wand

The Nuzzle Tip is manufactured by US-based company Wand Essentials, who make wands of various kinds as well as dozens of different attachments. However, the Nuzzle Tip does not need to be used with a Wand Essentials wand – which is good, because I don’t own one! This attachment fits perfectly over the Magic Wand Original, Doxy Original or Die Cast, Lovehoney Classic, Deluxe and Desire wands, and will fit many others. The circumference is 7 inches and the silicone is just slightly stretchy. When in doubt, measure the head of your wand before buying.

The Nuzzle Tip features a tongue-like appendage, covered on the underside in little nodules. The advertising copy says it’s good for internal or external stimulation, but I really can’t see it being long enough to do much internally (there’s no way you’re reaching a G-spot with this thing!) It’s really a clitoral stimulation attachment.

I wish it wasn’t pink or at least came in other colour options, but you can’t have everything.

A Note on Safer Sex, Care and Cleaning…

The Wand Essentials Nuzzle Tip on top of a pile of books, mainly about sex.
Also feat. part of my extensive book collection.

This attachment is made entirely of silicone, which is phthalate-free and non-porous. This means I am happy to recommend this attachment as 100% body-safe.

If your wand happens to have a porous head (some unfortunately still do, including the famed Magic Wand Original), using a silicone attachment is a great way to make it fully body-safe. Likewise, if you’re sharing your wand between partners and you’re not fluid-bonded, using attachments and swapping them out between users is an easy way to protect yourselves from unwanted fluids and potential STI transmission.

You can clean this attachment with a toy wipe or sterile medical wipe (I buy mine in bulk from medical suppliers,) and throw it in a pot of boiling water/a 10% bleach solution/the dishwasher to sterilise thoroughly.

Remember: this attachment is waterproof, but your wand probably isn’t!

So How Does It Feel?

The Wand Essentials Nuzzle Tip lying on a fuck.com notebook.
Also feat. Notebook from Fuck Dot Com.

When you switch on your wand, the effect is that the tongue on the Nuzzle Tip sort of flicks up and down very fast with the vibrations. This results in very intense and fairly pinpoint clitoral stimulation. The silicone dampens the strength of the wand a little bit, but really not very much.

I actually find I can come more quickly with this attachment with the wand on a lower setting than I can with the wand on full power but without an attachment.

It feels divine, folks. The flicking motion is intense and delicious. I can come in 2-3 minutes easily with this attachment.

One word of caution: without enough lubrication, this kind of stimulation can feel so intense it’s painful, so I always recommend a generous blob of water-based lube.

I’m not ashamed to say I have used this attachment for every single purely-for-fun, not-testing-anything-for-review wank since I received it. I never thought anything could make me love wands even more, but this baby has done it.

So Do I Recommend It?

Yes! I cannot tell you enough how much I love this attachment. If you want intense clitoral stimulation or crave the power of a wand with more pinpoint precision, the Nuzzle Tip is for you.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this and other wand attachments for review. Check out the wand attachments tag for all reviews in this series. If you buy using my affiliate links in this post, I make a small commission. All views are, and will always be, my own. Pictures are by me and not for use without express permission.

Masturbation Monday: “Dining Alone”

Today’s Masturbation Monday comes from a prompt by Mr CK – “write about going to a restaurant and getting it on with the hot waitress.” Well okay then!

A woman sitting alone reading at a restaurant table. For a Masturbation Monday piece called "Dining Alone". I noticed her the moment I walked in. Long waves of red hair, barely contained by the sensible ponytail, curves filling the modest-yet-sexy knee length black dress, a smattering of freckles from the summer sun across the bridge of her nose, grey-green eyes. So my type it hurts.

So straight it hurts, I tell myself as she asks me where I’d like to sit and shows me to a quiet booth at the back of the restaurant. The girls you like always are. I’ve been on this business trip ten days and I’m sick of everything this boring little town has to offer – which isn’t much. She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve seen since I stepped off the plane.

I order my glass of wine, my starter, my main course, and each time she comes to take an order or bring me something I try not to stare. The shape of her breasts in that dress – not to mention the fact that I haven’t had sex or even masturbated in weeks – has my cunt dripping into my knickers. I reach into my bag for my book, the book I’ve been secretly reading at night in my hotel room. Do I actually dare read it here, in public?

Fuck it, I think. No-one here is paying attention, and even if they do, they don’t know me.

Of course, the filth on the page just has me even wetter, reading about women doing filthy things to each other and imagining the beautiful waitress in those scenarios with me.

“What are you reading?” she asks, coming over to clear my starter plate away. I jump and look up guiltily, slamming the book shut and shoving it onto my lap under the table. To my disbelief, she reaches down and grabs it to take a look.

Best Lesbian Erotica,” she reads out loud, an eyebrow raised. Her gaze moves from the book cover to my now scarlet face. “Really now?”

“Research…” I stammer.

“Sure, babe.” She hands the book back to me. “More wine?”

“What? Oh. Uh. Yes. Please.”

She takes my glass and saunters away without another word. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear she was swinging her hips and ass deliberately to taunt me. Not knowing what else to do, I return to my book. When she brings my wine and, a few minutes later, my main course, I dare to flash what I hope is a flirtatious smile at her.

Judge me for reading porn in public, I dare you!

“Is everything okay?” she asks, appearing by my table again as I’m half way through my spaghetti alla carbonara. I nod, my mouth full. She pulls a pen out of her breast pocket, grabs the spare napkin from the unused place setting opposite me, scrawls a quick note and shoves it towards me. This all seems to happen in a single fluid movement, and she’s walking away again.

Shift finishes in twenty. When you see me go through the door in the far left corner, follow me – code is 1013. Don’t let my colleague see you. We won’t be disturbed. 

I nearly choke on my mouthful of spaghetti. Even as I’m telling myself that this is insane, I know that I will go. After all, when a beautiful woman summons you with such calm authority, what else can you do?

I keep my eyes on my food and occasionally glance at my watch as the ten minutes ticks down. At precisely one minute past ten, I watch out of the corner of my eye as she waves goodnight to her colleague and saunters to the back of the restaurant and out of sight.

Am I really going to do this? Do I dare? In a second, I decide. I throw down enough cash to cover my meal and a generous tip – a very generous tip – and head in the same direction, one eye on the other waitress, now the only person working. As she’s ringing up another customer, I seize my moment, punch in the code, and shut the “staff only” door behind me. I just have time to take note of that fact that we’re in a large and deserted commercial kitchen, all silver and chrome, when…

“I knew you’d come.”

She’s sitting on one of the shiny counter-tops, stockinged feet now free of her high-heeled shoes, sipping from a glass of what looks like whisky on the rocks.

“I don’t really know…”

I was going to say I don’t really know why I did, but she cuts me off. “Shush. You’ve been eye-fucking me since the moment you walked in. Lucky for you, I think you’re kinda cute too.” She hops down and comes towards me. She’s shorter than me without her tall shoes, but the confidence and power she exudes leaves me in no doubt who’s in charge.

My mind starts to race. Is she toying with me? Is this some kind of joke? What if someone walks in at any second? Then she presses her perfect, red, whisky-flavoured lips to mine, and I stop thinking about anything at all.

She pushes me back against the closed door, fingers twisting their way into my hair as we kiss. I think I moan, but the sound is swallowed by the kiss. I cannot remember the last time my cunt was so wet from nothing more than kissing and feeling someone’s body pressed up against mine.

She nudges my legs apart with her hand, then brings her leg between mine, thigh pressing against my cunt. Even through my tights and knickers, I’m sure she can feel the heat and wetness. Shameless, now, I grind against her, desperate for more stimulation. God, how long has it been? Can a few short weeks of no sex really make me into such a wanton slut?

I gasp when the leg is moved and replaced by her hand, the ends of long, elegant fingers dancing ever-so-softly against my cunt through the two thin layers of clothing. She’s teasing me, because she can see how much I want it.

“Please…” I whimper against her mouth.

“Is this what you want?” she asks, slipping her hand under the waistband of my tights and into my knickers, making contact with my desperate cunt at last. My gasp of pleasure is the answer she needs. When her fingers make contact with my clit and begin to circle it, I cannot help my moaning.

“You have to be quiet,” she says. “Can’t have you getting me caught and in trouble. If you make too much noise I’ll have to stop.” Her calm dominance and her talented fingers have me weak at the knees, gladly wanting to do anything she says, anything to please her. Another rush of wetness coats my already soaked panties.

I’ve always been loud in bed. It’s just the way I am. Back in my university days, my housemates hated it when I brought this girl or that boy home for a night of passion (which was often) because it meant none of them were getting any rest that night. But I believe this beautiful woman when she tells me that she will stop fingering me if I make too much noise, and all I want in the world right now is for her fingers to keep going, keep pushing me towards bliss.

Her rubbing has changed. Faster now, and harder, my own juices providing all the lubrication we need. I bury my face in her shoulder, in her hair, to hold back my sounds. My clit feels harder than I can ever remember it being, and I’m thrusting my hips, humping her hand with my cunt. I’m so close! For some reason it comes to me to ask her permission.

“Please can I come?” I whisper frantically.

“Just from this little bit of attention? God, you really were gagging for it, weren’t you?”

The flush of embarrassment nearly pushes me over the edge. “Oh, god, please…”

“You can come if you can do it quietly.”

My mouth opens into a scream but no sound comes out. Somehow, holding the sound in makes my orgasm even more intense and I come, harder than I have ever come before, in this stranger’s hand.

As I grab at the wall to steady myself, she places a small kiss upon my lips and then withdraws her hand from my knickers and shoves her sticky fingers into my mouth.

“Clean your mess up,” she orders. I suck the fingers clean, the musky smell and taste of my own cunt making me realise how much I want to taste hers.

“Can I…?” I ask, already crouching before her and starting to push her dress up.

“No. My colleague will be in here any minute and you need to be gone by then.” I swallow my disappointment as my hopes of getting to bury my face between her perfect legs are dashed. Then, perhaps inspired by her, I have a flash of daring.

“Quick. Give me your phone.” She does. I punch in the name of my hotel and my room number. “I’m here two more nights. Come and find me and I’ll return the favour.”

It’s not until she’s kissed me once more and then shoved me out of the back door and into the night that I realise I never caught her name.

Masturbation Monday is created and owned by Kayla Lords. Click the link to see what’s getting everyone off this week.

If you enjoyed this story, you can get bonus erotic fiction with #BonusSmutTuesday, every single week by signing up to my Patreon page at any level.

Image sourced through Pixabay.

[Toy Review] Bodywand Rabbit Wand Attachment

This is the first in a series of upcoming short-‘n’-sweet reviews of wand attachments, as this is something I get asked about all the time.

IThe bodywand rabbit wand attachment made of blue silicone sitting on top of a diary and pen on my desk.t’s no secret to anyone that I love wands. I currently own seven, and am lusting after at least two more. They make me come quickly, reliably, and hard. If I’m worked up, a wand can get me off in 2-3 minutes. Even starting from cold, it rarely takes longer than ten.

But did you know you can get all kinds of attachments and add-ons for your wand? I will admit that I’ve always looked at wand attachments and gone “meh”. I like my wands as they are and saw no benefit to adding anything extra to them. Until last night, I’d never even tried one.

But, as I said, I get asked about wand attachments all the time so it seemed like past time for me to try some out and bring y’all some reviews. Thankfully, my friends at Lovehoney have got us covered, and have kindly sent me several of their best-selling wand attachments to review.

The first is the Rabbit Wand Attachment by Bodywand.

I have a complicated relationship with rabbit vibrators. By which I mean I usually hate them, but very very occasionally stumble across one that really works for my body. So I will tell you straight off the bat that I, personally, did not enjoy using this wand attachment.

However, let’s back up and take a closer look…

The bodywand rabbit blue silicone wand attachment on my desk.However, the shape and size of many wand heads is similar enough that most standard-sizes attachments will work with most standard shaped wands. I used the Bodywand Rabbit Attachment with my Doxy Original, and it fit absolutely fine. It’s also pictured on Lovehoney’s site being used with the Lovehoney Classic Wand and it fits fine there too. The circumference of the part that goes over the wand head is 7 inches and the silicone is a tiny bit stretchy.

The insertable length of the Rabbit’s internal arm is 3.5 inches, and the circumference is 4.5″ at widest point. The clitoral arm is 2.5″ in length and very flexible, meaning it will fit

The Bodywand Rabbit wand attachment is made of body-safe blue silicone. As it has no motors, it is safe to boil-sterilise or pop in the dishwasher for thorough cleaning. Remember: this bit is waterproof, but your wand isn’t!

The Bodywand Rabbit attachment retails for £24.99 at Lovehoney. This may seem expensive for an attachment, but if you consider how much you’d pay for a rabbit that is anywhere near as powerful as a wand (hint: £50 absolute minimum) it’s quite a reasonable price.

My experience

The bodywand blue silicone rabbit wand attachment sitting on a red and black laptop keyboard.The clitoral arm on this attachment is very flexible, meaning that it will suit a range of different vulvas in terms of clitoris/vaginal opening placement. My problem with many rabbit toys is that, unless your anatomy is shaped and sized a very specific way, the two parts just don’t line up. I didn’t have that problem with this attachment.

I did, however, really struggle with the physical challenge of using this attachment. A wand is already heavy and bulky. Add an attachment, and it gets bulkier. An attachment like a rabbit, which typically requires very precise placement in order to pleasure the right spots, combined with the heft and bulkiness of a wand just makes the whole thing ridiculously difficult to put and keep in place. It kept slipping out of position and my arms were aching long before I achieved any kind of satisfaction.

Ultimately, my dislike of this attachment also came down to a matter of physical preference: my vagina simply does not like internal vibrations! My G-spot wants to be either pounded hard or caressed in a “come hither” motion. Not vibrated. Ever. (Are you surprised that one of the only rabbit toys I genuinely love is the Come Hither Rabbit?)

Recommended?

Yes, if… you like dual stimulation toys; you’re a fan of intense internal vibrations; you already know you enjoy rabbit toys but want the vibrations to be stronger.

No, if… you don’t like internal vibrations or prefer your clitoral and vaginal stimulation separate; you find it difficult to maneuver awkwardly shaped and bulky toys.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this and the other attachments I will be reviewing for you in the coming days. You can buy your own from them, or from SheVibe if you’re outside the EU. Images are by me and not to be used without permission.

[Guest Post] “Three Pairs of Ruined Panties, Two Delicious Dinners, and One Squirming Sex-Blogger Slut” by Jadis Liddell

Today I am super honoured to be hosting a guest blog by the gorgeous and talented Jadis of Tits and Test Tubes. She’s so brilliant I am frequently amazed when I remember 1) how young she is and 2) how new she is to sex blogging. Definitely an up-and-c0ming talent to watch out for, and a woman I am privileged to call a friend. I’ll let her introduce herself…

– Amy

___________________________

A woman's body from the waist to mid-thigh, wearing black lace knickers and drawing a heart on her hip and belly with red lipstick. For a guest post by Jadis Liddell.

Hey, I’m Jadis Liddell, a queer sex blogger who writes erotica, reviews sex toys and talks about mental health. I blog at Tits And Test Tubes, and am on Twitter at @TitsAndTestTube. I’ve been blogging for less than six months, so I was really excited, but also really nervous, to pitch this post to the wonderful Amy at Coffee & Kink, who I have a wee bit of a writer-crush on. I recently had my first threesome , a really interesting conversation about reclaiming the word ‘slut’, and took myself out on a date…

(And yes, bonus points will be given to those who sing the title of this post to the tune of the Christmas song that I have been told off – and spanked – for singing in May.)

While I’m sure there are many people who arrive at my blog looking for more science-related-content than my erotica delivers, I am at heart a scientist and a very curious person. A few weeks ago, I realised I had a unique opportunity to conduct a very fun experiment that played into many of my kinks and could hopefully help me learn something new about my sexuality.

I had a date for kinky play with two cute humans lined up in the next few weeks, and we’d spent a lot of time discussing and negotiating sexy fun for our adventure together. Lots of this involved playing into my kinks of denial and humiliation, with them making fun of me for how wet and needy my cunt was after they’d tormented me to their satisfaction. To help with this, and especially so we could explore them teasing me in public, I’d bought a new toy: specifically, the Desire butterfly vibrator from Lovehoney. (Reviewed by Amy here).

I was about to enter a week of denial when I wasn’t allowed to masturbate – following on from a few days when I was allowed to wank but not orgasm – to make sure that I was a horny mess by the time I got to play with them. I think this was guaranteed anyway, but they wanted to be certain. (As well as see me squirm, because they are a wonderful sadistic bastard and a mean-in-the-best-way switchy girl respectively.) However, I hadn’t tried out the new toy yet, and I was struck with inspiration for how to do so.

Something I’d been meaning to do since the start of 2018 was taking myself out on a date – which I was defining as getting dressed up and going out to dinner at a fancy restaurant. In my mind, it was an expression of self-care and self-love, and as well as a reminder that I am not ‘less’ because I’m not in relationship. Since my mental health meant I hadn’t yet done it at this point, I decided that I would combine testing my toy with taking myself out to dinner. I wore cute knickers, new tights, a pretty dress, a belt that matched my boots… and under all of it, a vibrator strapped to my cunt.

With instructions from my to-be-play-partners to be a good girl and turn the vibe on while you’re talking to someone, slut, I headed off on my date. In my handbag, the remote for the butterfly lay next to my new LGBTQIA+ YA novel, but by the time I’d reached the end of the street I’d slipped it into my pocket and had fun testing out the settings as I walked to my restaurant of choice.

As I was treating myself and ordering a luxurious three courses, I had lots of time to play with the toy. Like the obedient girl I am, I turned the vibrator on while ordering my dishes and asking for the bill, but I might have tweaked exactly how powerful the vibrations were for that. (Though they don’t know that, so ssshh!) While eating my food, I had the remote on my lap, and wiggled slightly as I increased and decreased the intensity and tried to find the position where I could maximise its stimulation on my clit.

Using the toy in such a public space, occasionally biting my lip to stop any little whimpers escaping, was extremely arousing. It felt like I had a dirty little secret, and I fantasised about getting off while surrounded by all the unsuspecting customers… or someone seeing me trying to get off and striding over to pull my dress up and expose what a filthy girl I was. It will be a surprise to none of you that my knickers were soaked with my arousal by the time I got home.

That was the first phase of my experiment. The next was trying it out when someone else held the remote, to see if it was hotter when someone else was in control.

Everything about my first threesome was brilliant, but I did especially enjoy the moment where I was told to put on the butterfly vibrator so we could go out and get food. They checked that the straps were tight and made me hold it away from my cunt (my poor, aching, hadn’t-been-touched-for-a-week cunt) so they could make sure it worked. I’d been given orders that I was to make sure the toy was charged so they could use it on me, and at the moment they tested its vibrations my bratty side wondered what they’d do to me if it wasn’t… but it was, so the game was on.

I’m a big fan of Japanese food but I’m not sure I fully appreciated the deliciousness of the sushi and noodles I consumed that night. The couple I was with passed the remote back and forth between them under the table, so I could only tell from their smirks who was toying with my cunt at any particular moment. They looked at me earnestly with completely innocent expressions, engaging me in conversation as they turned the vibrations up and watched my struggle to form coherent sentences.

They played with me in a way that was humiliatingly hot and they did it in such a delightfully gleeful way. I don’t think they made me order food; something that I’d been looking forward to and dreading in equal cunt-clenching measure. But I wasn’t brave – or stupid – enough to give my tormentors this especially devious idea to make me squirm.

On the way half-hour journey to their house, I sat in the back of their car with my legs spread and begged the mean pretty girl to turn on the vibrator while I made a mess of the seat under me. I loved every humiliating second.

But there’s another element: did you notice that my title says three pairs of ruined knickers? I admit, I may have simplified for the purpose of a clever blog title – the actual number is probably much higher. The results of my experiment show that I found being helpless in public, at the mercy of two cute humans who controlled my cunt, far more fun than just wearing the toy on my own. What’s maybe less clear, from the results I’ve related above, is that I actually found the discussion about being teased as hot (if not more so) than just playing with the vibrator myself.

One of the reasons I’m a sex blogger is that words are powerfully arousing to me and a key part of my sexuality. And as brilliant as our threesome was, I am not sure if it would have been quite as good if it hadn’t been preceded by weeks of flirting, sexting, and discussion of boundaries that built wonderful sexy anticipation. When I was allowed to, I jerked off furiously with lube and my favourite toys while messaging them about the wonderful ways they were going to make me suffer. When I wasn’t, I carefully sat on my hands so I wasn’t tempted to, because I really wanted to. Their words were good, the kind of good that made my cunt clench and made me catch my breath at their sheer hotness.

I think it comes down to what I’d call my biggest kink. Orgasm control is hot, humiliating scenes are hot, struggle-fucking is hot, but the connecting thread in all of these is power play. Having someone in charge, whether I’m fighting against that or being a good girl, is brilliant – and ultimately it wasn’t there when I was ordering dessert from the cute waitress on my date. The element of dominance and submission that I get off on was there through most of our pre-threesome conversations and left my cunt dripping every time.

So, the results of my experiment overall? I love exploring my sexuality alone, but getting to play with others who want to make me blush and squirm tends to result in doing more laundry, because I ruin so many pairs of knickers…

Remember to check out Jadis’s work, and if you enjoyed this piece, buy her a virtual coffee!

Image courtesy of Pixabay.

Masturbation Monday: “Oral Service”

A white women's body, from the top of the chest down, sitting with one leg folded in and the other up and bent. She is wearing nothing but pink knickers. For a Masturbation Monday story called Oral Service

She’s a good girl. I tell her so often. It’s one of the many reasons I love her. She’s been serving me faithfully for years now, my girl, and it’s got so much better since we’ve both been self-employed and working from home.

Usually when we’re at home together, we work side by side in my home office. Well… I sit at the desk and she sits cross-legged on the floor by my side, laptop open in front of her. I like her to wear nothing but cute knickers and her collar. Sometimes not even that. She fetches me coffee when she takes a break from typing, knowing exactly how I like it – cream, no sugar unless I’m having a particularly stressful day, and served to me by a gorgeous kneeling service submissive. She glows with pride when I take the drink, take a sip, then stroke her hair and tell her she’s my good girl.

Sometimes, though, the service I require from her is more intimate than just fetching my drink. You see, I’m an erotica author by profession. I write about sex – hot, steamy, wild, kinky, queer sex – for seven or eight hours a day. And more often than not, I get really fucking turned on doing it.

“Girl.”

“Yes, Mistress?”

“Get to a good stopping place and tell me when you’re ready”. I am considerate of her work and always give her a reasonable time-frame to refocus her attention on serving me. A few minutes later, she tells me she’s ready.

“Good. Now come over here and get under the desk. This scene I’m writing has got me needing your lovely tongue”. I push my chair back to let her get into position under my desk. Then I move back towards her, flip my skirt up – I hardly ever wear knickers for exactly this reason – and offer my cunt to my eagerly waiting girl.

She runs the tip of her tongue against my labia, then pushes it into my cunt, tasting my excitement. Then she finds my clit and begins first circling it, then flicking it gently. I moan, my back arching, hands gripping the edge of the desk. Fuck, she’s good. She licks faster, lashing my sensitive clit with her tongue. She might be my submissive, but I am all hers when she pleasures me like this.

My legs are beginning to tremble as she brings me closer to orgasm. I know she feels it, because she clamps her mouth around my clit and sucks it hard. This always tips me over the edge. I reach under the desk and grasp a handful of her hair, using it to hold her pretty face in position as my cunt spasms and I come, hard, in her mouth.

As my orgasm subsides I release her and fall back in my chair, catching my breath.

She peeks out from under the desk and grins.

“Kiss?” she asks in that adorable voice that I can rarely say no to.

I lean down to kiss her, my girl. My good girl, still with the taste of my orgasm on her lips.

Masturbation Monday is created and run by Kayla Lords. This week’s photo is by the gorgeous and talented Marie Rebelle, who blogs at Rebel’s Notes. Click the logo to see what others are getting off to this week. If you enjoyed this piece, please consider supporting me on Patreon (where you’ll get #BonusSmut every Tuesday!) or buying me a coffee. 

[Wearable Review] Bijoux Indiscrets Maze Cat Ears Headpiece

Chances are, if you’ve met me in meat-space, you’ve also met The Signature Ears. That is, the various cat ear headbands I wear as often as possible in sex-positive spaces. They’re a big part of how I present myself as Amy, they’re super memorable, and I love them. So I was thrilled when Bijoux Indiscrets, who sponsored Eroticon this year , approached me before the ‘Con and asked if I’d like to try one of their new cat ear headpieces.

Why yes, yes I would!

Feline Good…

BIjoux Indiscrets Maze cat ears headpiece on my desk.MAZE is an amazing collection of faux-leather accessories from Bijoux Indiscrets. The line includes cuffs, harnesses, collars and more. Most of the pieces are available in both black and brown. The aesthetic is bondage-inspired and focused on sensuality, power and blending “current fashion with traditional eroticism”. Thing strong lines, minimal adornments and kinky elegance. Though they’re showed being modeled by feminine folks, I see no reason why this stuff wouldn’t also look amazing on more masculine bodies.

As a vegetarian, I often feel a bit hypocritical in my love of leather and I have a complex relationship with it. So imagine my delight at learning that everything in Bijoux’s “leather” range is made of polyurethane from recycled materials. Environmentally friendly AND 100% vegan approved. Whoever said that looking gorgeous couldn’t be ethical and cruelty-free?

Maze pieces range from £25 to £90 in price. These ears retail for £40 from Bijoux directly, and are currently available at Shevibe for £33.25 (about $45). They’re luxury pieces and come with luxury price-tags. However, they’re beautifully made from quality materials and this company has stellar customer service reviews.

The Cat’s Whiskers…

Bijoux Indiscrets Maze cat ears headpiece lying on an open lined notebook.The Maze cat ears headpiece is available in both black and brown. I’m definitely a black cat, though, so that’s the colour I went for. It’s fully adjustable at the head. With a maximum circumference of 24.4 inches (minimum 21.25), this piece will fit the vast majority of adults just fine. There’s even space to add an extra hole if required, making it even more customisable to fit you perfectly.

I found the ears easy to adjust and super comfortable once they were in place. They were also nice and secure, so no risk of them falling off – which is important in any product, but especially one that you might pay £40 for!

Me-OW!

The top of my head in Bijoux Indiscrets Maze cat ears headpiece.
I’m sorry the quality of this isn’t brilliant and I’m also sad you can’t see my epic makeup, but anonymity comes first.

I honestly felt so fucking sexy in these ears. I paired them with my favourite catsuit from Latex Leather & Lace and high boots for the Eroticon Saturday night social and… let’s just say, heads were turning.

Was it over the top and ridiculous? Yes. Did I feel sexier and more powerful than pretty much ever in my life before? Also yes.

“They make you look hella kissable!” – anon. pretty girl.

Surprisingly, perhaps, I haven’t done very much kitten play or pet play of any kind. (I’m curious, though). But if that’s your jam, these ears could be the ideal piece to help you transform into the gorgeous sex-kitten you want to be.

CAT-egorically Recommended

(Sorry – the puns can’t all be great, okay!?)

I’m simply in love with these ears and this whole range! If you’re looking for a sexy, bondage-inspired aesthetic, you can’t go wrong with Maze.

Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me these ears in exchange for an honest review! All views are, as ever, my own. If you get your own, please consider buying from Shevibe using my affiliate links in order to send a small commission my way. Pictures are by me and not to be used without express permission.

[Toy Review] Temptasia Bling Bling Silicone Butt Plug with Clear Crystal

I have a complicated relationship with anal sex. For years, it was the hardest of the hard limits – partly thanks to undue pressure put on me to engage in it when I had barely begin exploring my own sexuality. However, I gradually opened up to exploring it with my now-Primary-partner Mr CK. Now I love it. I’m not able to do it often, but when we do I always really enjoy it.

My collection of anal toys is steadily growing (largely thanks to my sweetheart buying them for me as presents when we started exploring anal play together). But it’s much smaller than my collections of dildos and vibrators. So I was delighted when Peepshow Toys offered me the Temptasia Bling Bling silicone butt plug with a crystal to try out.

The Nitty-Gritty

The Temptasia Bling Bling butt plug on a bathroom sink.The Temptasia Bling Bling plug is manufactured by Blush Novelties, who produce a huge range of toys (they’re behind the Gaia, Real Nude and Aria toy lines, among many others).

The plug is made from silky-smooth silicone, which feels wonderful in the hand and the butt as well as being completely body-safe. The base is heart-shaped and embedded with a clear, sparkly faux-gemstone (the gem is made of plastic).

This plug is available in 3 sizes, so whatever your ass is up for, there’s a sparkly plug for you. I chose the medium, which is 2.8″ in insertable length and 1.4″ diameter at widest point. The small is 2.6″ x 1″, and the large is 3.2″ x 1.75″. None of them are huge. If you crave really big things up your butt, they might not be for you.

Each of the plugs has a tapered tip for easy insertion and a slim neck for comfort, as well as a large enough base to make them anal-safe. (You wouldn’t believe the amount of toys I see marketed as “for anal play” that don’t have a decent base/handle. The golden rule is, if there’s nothing to stop it disappearing all the way inside, don’t put it in your butt).

The Temptasia Bling Bling plug retails for $11 (S), $13 (M) or $15 (L) at Peepshow (this equates to about £8/£9.50/£11). Honestly, they could cost twice as much and I’d still say they were good value. Peepshow’s selection is living proof that good quality, body-safe toys do not need to cost an arm and a leg. I wish all the companies selling unsafe products “because people want cheap things” would catch up.

In Use

We used this plug after quite a long break from any kind of anal play, so I was a bit nervous. (“Shit, should have asked for the small!”) I said on taking it out of the packaging. But with some deep breathing and a generous helping of my favourite anal lube, it slipped inside comfortably.

Once it was in, I found the size perfect. It was large enough that I could feel it every time I moved, but small enough so as not to cause any unnecessary stretching or pain.

I’m happy to say that this is one of the most comfortable plugs I’ve ever worn. The silicone is lovely and soft and there are no seams, ridges or imperfections to cause discomfort. The neck is long enough that it sat comfortably, and the base didn’t chafe or rub against my butt cheeks. I wore it for about an hour while we did other things (see this review for details of that session!) and I could happily have worn it for much longer.

It was just so comfortable, you guys.

I also love how pretty these plugs look in use. The heart shaped gem is super cute and just appeals massively to my #Sparklefemme aesthetic. I’m sure they will be a hit with femmes, babygirls and lovers of shiny things everywhere!

Some Notes on Care & Cleaning

Normally, I recommend that you clean silicone toys without motors – especially anal toys – by boiling them in a pan of water for a few minutes. Unfortunately, you cannot do that with toys like this. The boiling water will ruin the glue that holds the gem in place and cause it to pop out.

The best thing to do is this: Give it a rinse to get any obvious butt-gunk and lube off. Then soak it in a 10% bleach solution (9 parts water to one part bleach) for a few minutes. After that, give it a really thorough wash in warm water and gentle soap, dry thoroughly, and store.

The joining line where the gem is glued into the base could definitely be a home for bacteria to hide. For that reason I recommend fully sterilising this plug between uses even if you’re not sharing it with a non fluid-bonded partner, and taking extra care around that area.

So do I recommend it?

Yes. I particularly recommend this plug for those new to anal play. It’s a safe, quality product at such an affordable price. You could even buy all three and use them as a beginner training kit, if you’re interested in conditioning your ass to take bigger insertables. A great product at an absolute steal of a price.

Thanks to Peepshow Toys for sending me this product in exchange for an honest review. All views are, as ever, my own. If you buy this product or anything from Peepshow Toys, please purchase through the affiliate links contained within this post. And don’t forget you can get 10% off by using code “coffee” at checkout! This sends a small commission my way. This helps me to keep bringing adult product reviews to you all. Photos are by me and not to be used without permission.

[Toy Review] Chrystalino Blue Glass Double-Ended Dildo

Chrystalino are a new brand to me. But when my new friends at Peepshow Toys included them in a list of review products for me to choose from, I just couldn’t resist the gorgeous blue glass! I went for the double-ended dildo as I did not previously have any double-ended toys in my collection.

The Chrystalino blue glass double ended dildo lying on top of its box on a brown chair seat.
This toy also comes in an attractive box.

A Touch of Glass…

I love glass toys. One of the first dildos I ever bought was my Icicles No. 5, which I used all the time until it sadly met its end on a tiled floor during a photoshoot.

Glass is hard and unyielding. It’s so smooth and so firm. You can warm it up or cool it down.

Specs ‘n’ Stats

My hand holding the Chrystalino double-ended blue glass dildo against a while background.
Hand model: me

The Chrystalino Double-Ended Dildo is a curved toy, 7″ in total length, making an insertable length (whichever way around you use it) of a little over 5″. The diameter is 1.3″ at the widest point. One end has a single large, bulbous head, and the other end has two smaller tapering bumps.

The material is handblown Borosilicate glass (which used to be what the common brand-name Pyrex represented, though apparently isn’t any more!) Borosilicate glass is non-toxic, non-porous and shatterproof, which makes this toy completely body-safe.

This double-ended dildo retails at Peepshow Toys for $35.99 (about £26.50), which is an absurdly good price for the quality. Peepshow currently carry six products from the Chrystalino range and they’re all between thirty and forty dollars. “Affordable AF!” as Phallophile Reviews notes.

Also Pretty AF

Apparently Chrystalino designs are “inspired by the Venetian glassmakers of Murano, with the beautiful art of lovemaking in mind“.  They’re all made of the same signature blue glass, which just screams luxury. They’re truly beautiful pieces of glass art as well as feeling wonderful. I would display this thing in my house!

So how did it feel?

The Chrystalino blue glass double-ended dildo on my kitchen counter with a "Coffee is My Love Language" mug.
Also pictured: “Coffee is My Love Language” mug by Kayla Lords. (https://www.redbubble.com/people/LovingBDSM/shop)

Mr CK and I tested this dildo together during a play session. I had my butt plugged (stay tuned for that review coming later!) and was lying on my front, and he slid the slimmer end of the dildo into me with the curve pointing toward the front of my body to press against my G-spot.

I cannot take a lot of hard thrusting with very solid toys. My vaginal opening gets sore and my cervix starts to complain. So what we’ve discovered works well with glass toys is this: slide it in, and then just wiggle it very slightly or tap on it lightly with a couple of fingers. This provides the necessary G-spot stimulation without making me sore. It’s less “pounding” and more “pressure”, and it feels incredible. I came five times in as many minutes just from this, until I had to safeword out and take a bit of a break.

After I’d recovered, I flipped over onto my back and we tried the thicker end of the toy. I’m pretty sure the noises I made when that bulbous head pressed against my G-spot scared the neighbours! With my sweetheart gently wiggling the dildo and me holding a wand to my clit, we brought me to another explosive orgasm.

This wand feels divine. The curve is perfect, the opportunity to work up from the smaller to larger ends is perfect, the shape of the heads is perfect.

Some more ideas for ways to use your Chrystalino glass toy

We didn’t use it anally, but this wand is designed to be safe for vaginal or anal use, so you definitely could.

Insert it and press a wand vibrator against the free end. The vibrations will travel all along the toy and feel wonderful.

Share it with a partner! I’m dying to use this toy with another vulva owner, one end inside each of us.

Heat it up or cool it down. The safest way to do this is run it under warm (not hot!) or cool water for a minute prior to play.

Some Notes on Cleaning

In most cases, as it’s non-porous, cleaning your Chrystalino dildo with a body-safe sterile wipe and some hot water and gentle soap will be more than sufficient.  However, Borosilicate glass is resistant to severe temperature changes (which is why it’s so often used in high-quality cookware!) – which means you can safely use boiling water to sterilise it if you want to.

Beware, though: not all glass sex toys are created equal, and some are made of soda-lime glass, which is still basically body-safe but cannot withstand boiling water or extreme temperature changes. This piece by Dangerous Lilly has more information.

Glass is condom-compatible, if you’re sharing it with a partner and concerned about potential STD transmission.

So do I recommend it?

Wholeheartedly. I adore it. Apart from possibly wishing it came with a storage bag (I’m always a bit scared of glass toys getting chipped in storage) I have absolutely no complaints.

This dildo and others in the Chrystalino range can be purchased from Peepshow Toys. If you use my affiliate links, I will make a small commission which helps me keep bringing honest adult product reviews to you. And don’t forget you can get 10% off by using code “coffee” at checkout!

Images are by me and not to be used without express permission. Thank you to Peepshow for providing me with this product in exchange for an honest review.