Holiday Gift Guide 2017

It’s that time of year, folks! Whatever you’re celebrating this winter, it’s likely you’ll have cause to give gifts to your loved one(s.) For your romantic or sexual partners (or friends with whom you have that kind of relationship) why not give them a sexy gift they’ll really love?

And, of course, don’t forget that YOU are someone you love! Whether you’re partnered this festive season or not, why not treat yourself to something special too?

To give you plenty of time to get your sexy shopping in, here’s my specially curated gift guide for 2017.

A couple of quick notes:

1: I have deliberately avoided gendered language in this post. I talk about vulva-owners and penis-owners because people of all genders can have all kinds of genitals and too many of us feel alienated by aggressively gendered toy marketing.

2: Links here are affiliate links unless otherwise stated. If you buy from an affiliate using my links, I will make a small commission which helps me to keep doing this work. As always, I only partner with companies I trust and I promise to NEVER recommend an unsafe product, or one I’m uncertain as to the safety of.

DISCOUNT JUST FOR ‘COFFEE & KINK’ READERS! Get 15% off EVERY gift guide item available at Lovehoney when you use the links in this post. Prices listed here DO NOT include the discount.

Top Picks: Vibrators
The Doxy Original, a purple wand style vibrator with a grey head, held on an upturned palm.

 

The Queen of vibrators and one of my favourite things in the whole world, the super-powerful Doxy Massager will always be top of my list. My Doxy is the only toy that always lives next to my bed, and it remains the best gift a lover has ever given me. £89.99 from Lovehoney.

The Doxy Die Cast, a deep purple wand vibrator with a large black silicone head.

 

 

If you love the Doxy, there’s also the newer, smaller-but-heavier Die Cast version,  with a beautiful aluminium and titanium body and body-safe silicone head. £149.99 from Lovehoney.

 

 

The We-Vibe Tango, a small blue bullet vibrator. For a review post.
Small but mighty, the We-Vibe Tango was one of my favourite discoveries this year. Discreet, small, easy to use and POWERFUL AS ALL FUCK, this one’s a sure winner for the power queens out there – and anyone who likes their vibes portable. Unlike many pocket-sized vibes, it’s also really rumbly. Check out my review. £54.99 from Lovehoney.

The Rocks Off Bamboo, a small lipstick shaped rose gold vibrator.

For those on a budget, the Bamboo vibrator by Rocks Off is my favourite low-priced vibe discovery this year. Body-safe, pretty, quiet and powerful-ish, this is a really solid little toy for the price. £16.99 on Lovehoney.

Top Picks: Dildos

The Idee du Desir Orchid 1001 Nights dildo for a review post. Pictured with an orchid flower.
The Idee du Desir Orchid 1001 Nights dildo is a really beautiful luxury wooden dildo that I completely fell in love with this year. With its subtle gold shimmer, it’s the height of classiness, and those gentle ridges feel divine. €90 from Idee du Desir (not an affilitate)


A line of Effulgence Ambit silicone dildos in a range of shimmery colours.I discovered Godemiche this year at Eroticon and I am in love with their beautiful, unique silicone toys – each one is hand poured and they come in all kinds of beautiful colours. The Effulgence Ambit range, pictured, is my favourite because GLITTER. £35-47 from Godemiche (not an affiliate.)

The Tantus Vamp Super Soft, a midnight purple dildo with a realistic head and flared base.

Tantus make beautiful silicone dildos that feel absolutely divine. My favourite is the Vamp Super Soft (in midnight purple, obviously!) With a flared base, it’s perfect for vaginal or anal use and can even be paired with your favourite harness for the ultimate strap-on experience. $69.99 from Tantus Inc.

 

A curved glass g-spot dildo from Lovehoney

 

Glass dildos have long been a love of mine. I like to insert them and then juuuust barely wiggle them against my G-spot. They’re so rigid that even this slight movement provides a world of blissful sensation. Try the curved sensual G-spot glass dildo from Lovehoney, £24.99.

Something A Bit Different

The Zumio, a purple sex toy with a small plastic tip. Shaped a bit like a toothbrush.
There’s been a lot of buzz (sorry) about the Zumio this year. I hate the claim that it is guaranteed to give any woman an orgasm in 60 seconds or less because BODIES DO NOT ALL WORK THAT WAY, but the product itself is genuinely innovative and has received overwhelmingly positive reviews. For lovers of direct, pinpoint clitoral stimulation, this is the one. £134.99 from Lovehoney.

 

The Eroscillator, a purple sex toy that looks a bit like a toothbrush. Pictured with 6 attachments.I was lucky enough to try the Eroscillator as a friend’s place recently. (Yes, I have excellent friends.) Despite looking like what Kate Sloan describes as a “steampunk toothbrush” (yes) it’s amaaaazing. Because it oscillates rather than vibrates, it somewhat mimics the sensation of fingering, only faster. It also comes with six (count them!) attachments. Perfect for lovers of the kind of clit stim that brings you to a deliciously slow-build orgasm. £199.99 from Lovehoney.

 

I just got my paws on this cutie for a review and it’s brilliant! The straps hold it against the vulva for hands-free use and it’s operated with remote control, making it super ergonomic to use solo AND suitable for delicious partnered play. Try wearing it and giving your lover the remote to take control of! It has 8 patterns and 12 speeds. £74.99 from Lovehoney.

 

The Satisfyer Pro Penguin Next Generation, a suction based sex toy that looks like a little penguin wearing a pink bow-tie. For a review post.

Suction based toys are all the rage right now and my favourite is the Satisfyer Pro Penguin Next Generation, which I reviewed recently. Don’t let the cuteness put you off – aside from literally looking like a little penguin in a bow tie (because obviously!), this baby gives me orgasms so powerful my partner can hear them from the other end of the house. £69.99 from Lovehoney.

Favourites for Couples

The We-Vibe sync, a wearable purple C-shaped vibrator. Pictured with the remote control and a mobile phone.

We-Vibe created the original wearable vibrator for couples, and the Sync is the newer and improved version of their classic. Worn during intercourse, the internal piece stimulates the penis and G-spot, while the outer arm stimulates the clitoris. It’s remote controlled, so no worries if you want to adjust the speed while you’re wearing it, and the app functions make your experience super customisable. £159.99 from Lovehoney.

 

A black strap on aet with silicone dildo and another smaller dildo pictured to the side. From Lovehoney. I love strap-on play, especially pegging (where a vulva-owner penetrates a penis-owner anally with a strap-on.) This set is great value. I love it because the harness is really adjustable to fit a wide range of bodies, and you can use it with any dildo with a decent base. I like using the 5 inch slimline dildo it comes with for pegging, and swapping out for the bigger size or my Tantus if fucking another person with a vagina. £44.99 from Lovehoney.

 

The Feeldoe, a purple double ended v-shaped vibrating dildo.

The Feeldoe has become a classic for good reason. The shorter end is inserted into the vagina of the giving partner, and they use the longer end to fuck the receiving partner. Somewhat more advanced than a basic strap on, but with the huge added bonus of direct internal stimulation for the fucker. Plus, it’s made from lovely body-safe silicone and even has an inbuilt vibrating bullet. From $124.99 from Tantus.

 

Top Picks for Dicks

Note: this section is somewhat out of my area of expertise. These recommendations come from extensive reading of reviews and help from some of the wonderful dick-owners in my life!

 

I can’t have a section on toys for dicks without mentioning Fleshlight, the original and best-selling masturbator. Flight by Fleshlight comes highly recommended. One reader commented that he likes that it’s less obviously anatomical looking than some penis toys. £44.99 from Lovehoney.

The Pulse III Solo, a black three-quarter sleeve style toy for penises.

 

I adore Hot Octopuss. Their toys are so innovative and their #SexNotStigma campaign is brilliant. (Check out the sponsored post I wrote for them a little while ago!) Their Pulse III uses oscillating Pulse Plate technology, which is – get this – medically proven to bring about ejaculation. The Solo is designed for – unsurprisingly – solo use, while the Duo boasts a vibrating underside to stimulate a vulva during partnered play. £79.99 (Solo) or £99.99 (Duo) from Hot Octopuss, with 10% off when you use this link and code CK10.

The Tenga Black Flip Hole, a black male masturbation sleeve with buttons on the side, held in a female hand.

 

The Tenga Flip Hole masturbator boasts “multiple asymmetrical textures and buttons that enable you to manually tailor pressure anywhere along your shaft.” This is a far cry from “just stick your dick in and fuck it” penis toys, and allows for an amazing range of different sensations. Bonus: it pops open for easy and thorough cleaning. £69.99 from Lovehoney.

The Tantus C-Sling, a red silicone cock ring with a contoured tongue.

Cock rings are brilliant! They restrict flow of blood from the erect penis, giving a stronger erection and keeping the dick harder for longer. The C-Sling from Tantus works in basically the same way, with the added bonus of the contoured tip which gently stimulates the perineum during play. $34.64 from Tantus.

 

Anal Fun

The We-Vibe Ditto, a purple silicone butt plug. Pictured with the remote control and a mobile phone.

The We-Vibe Ditto is We-Vibe’s first and long-awaited anal toy. It’s relatively small – the insertable length is only about 3 inches – and uses We-Vibe’s signature powerful vibrations. It’s remote- or app-controlled and has 10 different vibration modes. The Ditto is even waterproof if you want to get your sexy on in the shower. £109.99 from Lovehoney.

 

A glass butt plug from Lovehoney.

 

Did I mention I LOVE glass toys? Well, that goes for anal toys too. Mr CK bought me this beauty from Lovehoney for my birthday and it is one of the most perfect plugs to ever go up my butt. £19.99 from Lovehoney.

 

The Rocks Off Naughty Boy, a curved reverse C-shape black prostate vibrator.

 

I love Rocks Off! Their Naughty Boy is a slimline vibrating prostate stimulator with a gentle curve to perfectly hit those sweet spots. It has 7 different functions and is powered by a removable RO80 bullet. £49.99 from Lovehoney.

 

The Aneros MGX, a white curved prostate stimulator with a curly base.

 

This one comes to the list courtesy of my friend, fellow blogger and sometimes co-creator Exhibit A, who describes it as “the other love of [my] life!” (One assumes the first love is his awesome wife Livvy!) The Aneros MGX is a plastic (body-safe!) prostate massager works with the sphincter muscles for hands-free fun, and stimulates both the prostate and perineum. £39.99 from Lovehoney.

 

Let’s Get Kinky

If you’re into impact play, how about treating yourselves to the most beautiful floggers you’ll ever own? Kabunza is a small business, headed up by designer, maker and teacher Aemilia Hawk. Not an affiliate, I just love them forever. Every creation is unique and you can even custom-order. Various prices.

A pair of silver "Clover" nipple clamps held in a female hand.

 

I’m a big fan of nipple clamps, and clover clamps are my favourites of all! They are quite pinchy and tighten when you pull on them. Not recommended for beginners to nipple play! This is the set we have, from Bondage Boutique. They’re so affordable and have lasted us two years and are still going strong. Remember… they hurt more coming off! £8.99 from Lovehoney.

A coil of violet dyed hemp rope from Twisted Monk

 

Bondage enthusiasts understand the sensual and aesthetic appeal of beautiful rope. If you love natural fibres in beautiful colours, get your hands on some of Twisted Monk’s hand-dyed hemp. The violet, pictured, is my favourite. Not an affiliate. $35.99 for 30ft from Twisted Monk.

 

Luxurious Lingerie & Foxy Fetishwear

 

The Lovehoney Moonlight Wine Crotchless Basque, a deep red one piece of lingerie, modelled by a pretty white woman with dark wavy hair.I The Lovehoney Moonlight plunge babydoll, made of red wine satin and black lace. Modelled by a pretty dark haired woman.am completely in love with Lovehoney’s brand new Moonlight range. The black lace and red-wine satin oozes sophistication. My favourite pieces, pictured, are the plunge babydoll set and the crotchless body. Perfect for cosy winter nights in with your lover. I’ve just received a review piece (look out for that!) and it makes me feel like a total babe. Every piece comes in plus sizes, too, so everybody can look and feel gorgeous. £34.99 from Lovehoney. My favourites are included in the offer, or you can check out the whole range and take advantage of 25% off when you buy any two pieces.

 

A black PVC full body catsuit, modelled by a pretty white woman with blonde hair.

 

My new favourite is this sexy catsuit from Latex, Leather & Lace. I tried one on in their new store and it was love at first meow! (Watch out for my full review, coming soon). Pair with some sexy black boots (like those below, perhaps?) and you’ll be “feline” gorgeous all night long. £64.99 from Latex, Leather & Lace.

 

 

A black leather overbust corset modelled by a dark haired white woman running her hand through her hair.

 

I adore real leather. The feel, the warmth, the smell… oh god, the smell. Mmmff. That’s why I am lusting HARD after this Lady Anne corset by Allure Leather, and I’m sure you will be, too. £160.99 from Latex, Leather & Lace.

 

 

Pleaser 1020 black high heeled lace up boots
I hate most things about winter. What I do love, though, is that it’s BOOTS SEASON! I can’t even remotely walk in heels without breaking myself, but I do enjoy wearing them to feel sexy once in a while. This winter I’m lusting after these Pleaser beauties. The high-heel wearer in your life is bound to love them too! £70.95 from Latex, Leather & Lace.

 

 

All pictures in this post are property of the respective retailers and are reproduced here with their permission.

[Toy Review] The Rock Chick

I’ve been wanting to try the Rock Chick for a long time and I really wanted to love it as it’s such a neat design (and also made by Rocks Off, who did the Ruby Glow which I adore.)

The Rock Chick by Rocks Off. A purple c-shaped sex toy

Stits ‘n’ Stats…

It’s a C-shaped, “2-in-1″ toy, one end a g-spot dildo and the other, ribbed end supposed to sit against the clitoris while the dildo end is inserted. It’s powered by a removable vibrating bullet and has 7 settings – 3 speeds of constant vibration and 4 patterns.

Size-wise, the insertable length is about 4 inches and the girth is about 1.3”. Not one for size queens, but a good length and perfect curve for g-spot stimulation.

My experience…

The Rock Chick is supposed to be “hands free,” but it didn’t quite work for me that way – I had to hold the clitoral end against my body to get the most out of the vibrations when I was lying on my back. A position that did work for me was lying on my front with a pillow beneath my hips, my body weight effectively pinning the toy in place, and grinding against it.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t orgasm from this toy, even with a few days of built-up horniness and some damn good porn in front of me. The vibrations, dampened by the thick silicone, just weren’t strong enough for me. I enjoyed the sensations, but it wasn’t quite enough.

My Ratings (all scores out of 5★)

Price: ★★★★
This toy retails on Lovehoney for £39.99, which isn’t a bad price. It’ll be out of some budgets but it’s nowhere near as expensive as some of the higher end toys. It puts it pretty squarely into the bottom of the mid-range, which is about right.

Materials: ★★★★★
The main body is soft and flexible silicone, which I can’t fault. It’s body safe and feels lovely. The removable bullet is hard ABS plastic, which is also body safe.

Appearance: ★★★★
It comes in purple (yay!) and pink (meh,) so pretty standard colours for sex toys for people with vulvas, but the Rock Chick is attractive enough. The C shape makes me think of my favourite C-word (CUNT) which is kind of pleasing.

Ease of Use: ★★
Mmm, unfortunately this is where this toy really falls down for me. The “hands free” idea is cool but sadly it just doesn’t quite work for my body. The G-spot part had to go too deep, almost painfully so, in order to get the clitoral stimulator into the right position. Of course, it’s impossible for a toy to fit every body perfectly. For someone whose body is different, it might work really well. I sort of got around this by using the “face down, hips on pillow” position mentioned above, but even then I needed to frequently use a hand to adjust the toy or keep it in place. You change the settings with a single button located on the end of the clitoral part that is a little difficult to press.

Ease of care & cleaning: ★★★
The shape and smooth silicone mean it’s easy to clean the Rock Chick with a sterile wipe. It’s also waterproof, so you can clean it thoroughly in hot water. The bullet is removeable, so you can take it out and clean it separately. The embossed letters on the side do make for a bit of a bacteria trap, so please be extra thorough when cleaning that area if any body fluids get in there. You could put a condom over the insertable end for extra safety or when sharing.

Versatility: ★★★★★
The Rock Chick has 7 different settings, making it versatile whether you like constant vibrations or patterns. You could also remove the bullet and use it separately, if you like. It’s much stronger this way though still somewhat buzzy. It’s a waterproof toy, so you can play with it in the bath or shower. The shape means the insertable end would be suitable for anal use with no risk of getting stuck. I can also see that it could be a good toy for double-vaginal penetration with a partner.

Intensity: ★★
Just too weak, unfortunately. When I removed the bullet it felt nice and strong in my hand, though moderately buzzy, but the padding of the silicone dampened it to the point that it couldn’t get me off. Disappointing. For someone who is into much gentler vibrations, it might work.

Overall Score: ★★★
I really like the design and it has some good points. It was really the weakness of the vibrations that ruined it for me. But if you’re after a dual-purpose toy and you’re not as powervibe-mad as me, this toy might work really well for you.

Note: I purchased this toy for myself in a closing down sale. This post does contain affiliate links and if you buy through them I make a small commission. This does not in any way affect my views on the product which are, and will always be, my own. Don’t forget to use code COFFKINK10 at Lovehoney for 10% off!

The image featured in this post was offered for use via Creative Commons Licensing.

[Toy Review] The Ruby Glow

To begin with, there are two things you need to know about Yours Truly. The first is that I know what I like and, when it comes to sex toys, what I like is lots and lots of hard vibrations right on that spot on my clit. For this reason, I haven’t bought a new vibrator since my amazing partner gifted me a Doxy nearly two years ago. The second is that I am endlessly curious and a bit of a geek. If something is a bit quirky, a bit different, or a bit “ooh, I’ve never seen one of those before,” I have to try it, especially if it relates to sex. Is there any wonder, then, that when I encountered the new Ruby Glow (designed by Tabitha Rayne and made by the lovely folks at Rocks Off) at Eroticon 2017 I simply had to get one?

The Ruby Glow pink saddle-style sex toy, pictured in its box with another one in front of the box.

The Ruby is, essentially, a ride-on external vibrator. It’s hands-free, non-penetrative and can be used through clothing or directly on the body. It has ten different settings and dual motors to control the vibrating vaginal/perineal mound and the clitoral stimulator, which can be used together or separately.

The Ruby Glow sex toy, a pink saddle-style vibrator, labelled with the words "clitoris," "pubic bone" and "vagina/perineum" and marked as being 17cm long.

I first tried the Ruby Glow sitting on the edge of my (epic, super-king) bed at the end of a good fuck with my primary partner, Mr CK. There were some pleasant vibrations coming from the toy but nothing that was going to have be screaming in orgasmic bliss any time soon. The problem, we quickly identified, was that the surface of the bed wasn’t rigid enough for me to be able to grind against the toy in a satisfying way.

‘What if you tried it on my desk chair?’ Mr CK asked. And that’s exactly what I did. Laptop in front of me with some of my favourite smut open, I put the toy between my legs and set it going. I tried a few settings. My favourite, by far, is the highest of the 3 ‘constant vibration’ settings on both my clit and my vaginal opening – but, as with anything else in sex, your mileage may very well vary.

I readjusted the toy a few times to get it on my clit in just the right spot, but once it was in place I could grind against it and fuck it easily, without needing to use my hands – keeping them free to browse through the delicious porn on my screen..

I’m not, typically, a girl who comes quickly from clitoral stimulation, but I do have my biggest and most satisfying orgasms this way if I persevere. It took me about 25 minutes to get off with the Ruby Glow, and it was a deliciously slow and drawn out orgasm with a long build-up. Yum!

This toy is perfect for me particularly because I like to read erotica (typically on a screen but occasionally in a physical book) while I masturbate. Anyone who has done this will understand the fine art that is balancing a book/laptop/other device in one hand, while keeping the other free for finger action or holding a toy. The Ruby Glow beautifully solves this problem. It’s also ideal for anyone who writes erotica and finds themselves getting turned on while working, anyone who engages in cyber sex and wants to wank and type at the same time, and anyone with joint or mobility issues that make using a hand-held toy difficult. In short, if you’re a person with a vulva who enjoys vibrations, I recommend you give this toy a try.

My Ratings (all scores out of 5★)

Price: ★★★★★
At £39.99 it’s comparable in price to many of the far less luxurious – not to mention less safe – jelly and plastic toys on the market, and more affordable than many of their higher end counterparts.

Materials: ★★★★★
It’s made of absolutely gorgeous, silky soft, body-safe silicon.

Appearance: ★★★★★
It’s super pretty and it looks like a little saddle, which makes me giggle. And for someone new to sex toys, it looks a lot less threatening and scary than a giant wand or ‘rabbit’ style vibe. It even gets a pass on being pink (a bit of a bugbear for me) because it matches the name and it’s not an obnoxious, ouch-my-eyes neon.

Ease of Use: ★★★
It takes some experimenting to get the angle and setting that works for your body, and you may have to try it on one or two different surfaces or chairs to find out what works for you. Worth persevering, though!

Ease of care & cleaning: ★★★★
Easy to clean with a body-safe sterile wipe available from medical suppliers, or some toy cleaner available from most sex toy shops (read the ingredients! Some of them contain nasties you don’t want on your sensitive areas.) It cannot be submerged as it’s battery powered, so cannot be fully sterilised with boiling water.

Versatility: ★★★★
With two individually-controllable motors and ten different speed and pulse settings, an easily customisable wank is yours with the Ruby.

Intensity: ★★★★
Full disclosure here: I like my vibrations intense. I’ve found myself even wanting to turn my beloved Doxy, “the world’s most powerful massage vibrator,” up one notch higher than it goes. For this reason I’m giving the Ruby 4★ instead of 5 on intensity, because I’d have liked a setting or two higher. I completely acknowledge this will not be everyone’s experience and it still gave me a glorious orgasm!

Overall Score: ★★★★
Cute, safe, innovative and effective! Could have done with a bit more power, and not the quietest, but I really have no other complains. A great addition to your collection. Get yours here!

(All pictures in this post used by kind permission of the Ruby Glow team.)