Tag: satisfyer

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Wand-er Woman

Published on by AmyLeave a comment

Satisfyer started out making pressure wave toys, bringing products like the excellent Satisfyer Pro 2 and the famously adorable Pro Penguin to market. After that, they branched out into vibrators, some of which I loved and some of which were just okay. So I suppose it was inevitable they’d make a wand eventually.

The good folks at EroticFeel, an online sex shop selling an extensive range of products from sex toys and lingerie to BDSM gear, were kind enough to send me the Satisfyer Wand-er Woman to try out.

Wand-erful First Impressions?

The Wand-er Woman arrived discreetly in plain packaging and inside, the toy was presented in an attractive blue/pink/purple box with information about the toy and line drawings of nude women. I have to say that I don’t like this product’s name. It’s a cute pun, sure, but it’s really unnecessarily gendered since wand vibrators are for everyone.

Satisfyer Wand-er Woman wand vibrator

My other first impression of the Satisfyer Wand-er Woman is that it’s LARGE. Measuring 34cm (13.4″) in length and weighing in at 647g, this is not a small toy. I’m not necessarily opposed to large toys, but they can be challenging to hold and manipulate and are inaccessible for some people. I actually found the thickness of the Wand-er Woman’s handle to be more of a problem than its weight alone. I have fairly small hands, but the thickness of this toy’s handle combined with its weight made it challenging to hold for long enough to have a decent play session with it.

Woman holding magic wand vibrator by Satisfyer

The Wand-er Woman is available in three colourways: black, white, or purple. I received the white version, which has lilac buttons and a silver decorative bad at the top of the handle. The Wand-er Woman is rechargeable via the included cable, and completely waterproof. The body and head are coated in soft, body-safe matte silicone and the silicone cap is removeable from the head, which allows for easier cleaning.

In Use

The Wand-er Woman boasts ten vibration settings (constant vibration plus 9 patterns) and 5 speeds, for an impressive total of 50 possible combinations. The three-button interface is simple and intuitive, and the buttons are easy to press. I appreciated being able to scroll through the speeds by simply holding the plus or minus buttons down, without needing to press repeatedly. The Wand-er Woman’s neck has a little flex, which is useful for positioning.

Satisfyer Wand-er Woman magic wand vibrator buttons

The Wand-er Woman is not quite as powerful, nor as rumbly, as many of the corded wands in my collection. It doesn’t deliver the eyeball-shaking, whole-room-rattling intensity of some of my all-time faves. It also doesn’t quite match up in terms of deep, penetrating rumbles.

Satisfyer Wand-er Woman wand vibrator

That’s not to say it isn’t powerful, though! All but the most discerning Power Royalty will still be able to get plenty of pleasure out of this toy. It’s not exactly buzzy, either, just… somewhere closer to the centre of the buzz/rumble spectrum. I need the highest setting to get off, but not everyone’s clit is as demanding as mine. I also don’t particularly care for patterns – I tried them all for the sake of being thorough, and because I keep hoping to meet a vibration pattern that changes my mind about vibration patterns, though I haven’t yet.

The cordless design is useful, as I don’t always wand power cords trailing across my bedroom (and, in environments like play parties, there isn’t always an outlet available). The battery life is good. Noise-wise, it’s fine. Interestingly, I’ve seen some users complain of their Wand-er Woman being excessively loud, but mine just makes a persistent hum at the kind of volume you’d expect for a toy at this power level. It’s not silent but it doesn’t sound like a power tool, either.

Verdict

One of the key selling points of the Satisfyer Wand-er Woman is its relatively affordable price point. Retailing for £46.95 at full price, it’s less than half the price of many of its main competitors. If you’re willing to cope with the downsides, such as the toy’s weight and the width of the handle, and you’re not expecting the same power you’d get from a pricy corded toy, it’s a perfectly fine option. Folks on a budget, or beginners wanting to try out wands without splashing out £100 or more immediately, might find it’s perfectly adequate for their needs.

I don’t think I’ll be reaching for it regularly, but I’m glad it exists!

Thanks to EroticFeel for sending me this product to review. All views are, as ever, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Header image for a review of the Satisfyer Luxury High Fashion

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Luxury High Fashion

Published on by AmyLeave a comment

I’m going to come out and say it: I don’t understand the point of the new Satisfyer Luxury line. They’re basically the same Satisfyer pressure wave stimulators we know and love, but with additional fancyness added. The Satisfyer Luxury High Fashion landed on my doorstep along with its sister product, the Prêt-à-Porter, back in December and I’ve been wondering what to say about it ever since.

The basic MO for this range – which also includes the Haute Couture – seems to be “same basic tech, but fancier exteriors and random fashion words on the box.” I honestly don’t entirely get it.

So what makes this one different?

The Satisfyer High Fashion in my hand

The Satisfyer Luxury High Fashion is a pressure-wave clitoral stimulator with added vibrating function. For anyone who is unfamiliar with this type of toy (also sometimes referred to as “suction toys,”) they feature a nozzle which sits over the clitoris and provides stimulation via rapid pulses of air. Sometimes, as in this instance, the nozzles also vibrate.

The High Fashion is, as far as I can tell, an almost identical copy of the Satisfyer Pro 2 Vibration, but in a different exterior. They are the same basic size, shape and have the same button layout. Compare:

The Satisfyer High Fashion and Satisfyer Pro 2 Vibration side by side

The High Fashion is near-identical to the Pro 2 Vibration not only in appearance but in function, right down to the 10 vibration settings and 11 levels of pressure wave power.

So the difference is literally the aesthetic. And I’ll give it this, the High Fashion is a very aesthetically pleasing product! It has a brushed aluminium exterior that looks high-end and stylish. The packaging is similarly fancy and reminds me of the kind of box that a bottle of fancy perfume might come in.

The Satisfyer High Fashion in its packaging
The Satisfyer High Fashion in its packaging

Other important bits and bobs

In the box, along with your toy, you’ll find the charging cable, a multi-language instruction booklet, and a black velvety drawstring storage pouch.

The Satisfyer High Fashion with charging cable, instruction booklet and storage pouch

The Satisfyer Luxury High Fashion is USB rechargeable via a magnetic cable. This can be a bit finnicky, so make sure that the flashing charging light is on once you’ve plugged it in. This toy is fully waterproof, for bath or shower fun if that’s your thing.

The nozzle, i.e. the main part that comes into contact with the body, is made of soft and squishy – and body-safe – silicone. I did notice that the silicone of the nozzle is significantly softer and squisher than previous Satisfyer products. Aluminium is also a body-safe material for sex toys, so you can use the Satisfyer High Fashion with confidence. As always, water-based lube is your friend and makes everything better.

One thing I did find disappointing is that the nozzle is not removeable, unlike on other Satisfyer toys. This makes a really thorough clean more difficult (you cannot boil-sterilise, for example) as well as removing the possibility of using different nozzles if sharing the toy with a partner.

The noise level is reasonable. I did the usual “toy on bed, close bedroom door test” and, with the toy on full power, could hear only a faint hum. This one is unlikely to wake your roommates unless you have paper-thin walls! It does feature what they rather grandly call “Whisper Mode,” but as far as I can tell that just means “it’s much quieter when on the lowest setting.” Which, duh.

In use

To be fair to the Satisfyer High Fashion, it did make me orgasm – hard. The shape, angle and clit-friendly squishyness of the head is well-designed, and the wider rim of the nozzle also means that the vibrations deliver indirect pleasure around the clitoris while the pressure waves stimulate it directly.

The vibrations themselves are very buzzy and not particulatly strong. They’re a fine addition to the main event – the suction nozzle – but by themselves would do almost nothing. Having played with the High Fashion both with and without the vibrations, I can honestly take or leave them.

The Satisfyer High Fashion on a black and white sheet
The Satisfyer High Fashion on a white sheet

The button placement is intuitive and sensible, in the middle of the handle on the back, and the buttons easy to press. I appreciate the up-and-down controls for the suction nozzle, but would have appreciated the same for the vibrate function. Being able to control the vibrations and the suction nozzle separately is nice, but having to scroll through all 10 vibration functions is annoying and this could be easily solved with a “back” button.

I usually masturbate on my back with my legs apart, but find that I get much more pleasure out of pressure wave toys by keeping my legs closer together. This position means that the whole of my clit is engulfed in the nozzle of the toy. Your mileage may vary, of course, but if you’re new to this type of toy you’ll want to experiment with positioning to see what works for you.

Final impressions

Overall, a decent and perfectly satisfactory toy. But ultimately a near carbon copy of an earlier model, put in a fancy exterior and sold for two and a half times the price. (The Satisfyer Pro 2 Vibration has an RRP of $69.99, while the High Fashion retails at an eye-watering $149.99.)

Unless you’re really into fancy aesthetics and luxury packaging, save money and get the Pro 2 Vibration instead.

Thank you to Satisfyer for providing me with this product to review. Affiliate links appear in this post and purchasing through them supports my work at no extra cost to you! All views, as ever, are my own.

Header image for a review of the Satisfyer Kegel Balls

[Mini Toy Review] Satisfyer Balls Kegel Exercisers

Published on by Amy1 Comment

What are kegel balls and what are they used for?

Kegel balls, sometimes called Ben-wa balls or kegel exercisers, are duos or trios of small weighted balls that are inserted into the vagina. Supposedly, they help the person to perform kegel exercises more effectively and with better results. There are also claims that they improve sexual pleasure over time, even making it easier to reach orgasm. But there is little actual scientific evidence for any of this.

My hand holding a set of red Satisfyer kegel balls

What the science says

“The potential benefits of doing Kegel exercises on a regular basis include: greater ease in achieving orgasm, increased intensity of orgasm, increased lubrication, heightened control over sensation during penetration, and protection against urinary incontinence and bladder prolapse.” (Bartlik et al, 2010)

When it comes to the difference between performing kegel exercises with and without balls or similar devices, though, there’s less evidence.

One 2013 study examined the effect of “vaginal spheres” (kegel exercisers) in the treatment of stress urinary incontinence and found a statistically significant difference in the improvement shown by women who used the spheres vs those who performed kegel exercises without.

A different study, however, used “weighted vaginal cones” to treat urinary incontinence, and found that “there was little evidence of difference for a subjective cure between cones and pelvic floor muscle training” (Herbison & Dean, 2013.)

So the short answer is that there is limited evidence on one of the claims commonly made about kegel exercisers, and virtually no evidence one way or the other for any of the other claims. Anecdotally, balls may help by making the user more likely to actually do their exercises, rather than making the exercises more effective by themselves – but this is little more than speculation. The literature simply doesn’t exist yet.

(Can some scientists get on this please?)

So why would I want kegel balls?

I deliberated for ages on whether to categorise this review under “Sex Toys” or “Sexual Health Products,” but eventually decided on the former. Dubiously-evidenced medical claims aside, the purpose of kegel balls is simple: they can feel really good!

Walking or moving around with something inside you can feel amazing if you’re a person who enjoys vaginal penetration. I find that on the occasions I’ve worn kegel balls for any length of time, I tend to be at a constant level of arousal for however long they’re in. Wearing kegel balls can also be fun as part of a power exchange game, if you’re into that. I definitely find it hot when my Dom instructs me to go out with my cunt full.

Basically, treat kegel ball as a sex toy and not as a medical device, and you’re more likely to have fun!

So how do the Satisfyer balls measure up?

The Satisfyer Balls come in sets of three, which get progressively heavier (79g, 114g and 150g.) There are also alternative sets available in lighter weights. Each of the pairs of balls is a different colour (blue, pink and red) and they are made of silky smooth, soft and body-safe silicone.

Official product image of the Satisfyer Kegel Balls

Each of the balls have gentle ridges to them, which provide delicious internal stimulation.

The balls themselves and the joins between them feel well-made and sturdy. However, the “handle” loops are ridiculously thin and flimsy! They stretch when pulled, making them ineffective for helping to remove the balls from the vagina, and though mine have held out so far I don’t see them lasting very long.

With that said, these sets are inexpensive and good value (3 pairs of balls for £30.95/$34.99) so if you’re new to using kegel balls and just want to try, they’re not a bad place to start.

Pro tips for using kegel balls safely and pleasurably

  • Remember to use plenty of good quality, water-based lube.
  • Start slowly – keep the balls in for just 10 or 15 minutes at first. You can build up from there.
  • Give your body a break every few hours at least, never sleep with your kegel balls in, and take them out immediately if you experience any pain.
  • Boil-sterilise your kegel balls between uses.
  • If you like, try keeping your kegel balls in while you use a clitoral vibrator or do anal play. The dual stimulation can be fun!

Have you used kegel balls? Share your experience!

Thanks to Satisfyer for sending me these to review. All views are, as always, my own. Purchasing through the affiliate links in this post helps to support my work.

A header image for a review of the Satisfyer Luxury Prêt-à-porter

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Luxury Prêt-à-porter

Published on by AmyLeave a comment

The Short Verdict: the same Satisfyer you know and love… but fancy!

So when it comes to the list of Things Amy Does Not Understand, “fashion” ranks somewhere between “football” and “quantum physics.” I don’t get it, I’ve never got it, and I highly doubt I ever will. That’s maybe why I was a bit baffled when the Satisfyer Prêt-à-porter (along with its sister product, the Satisfyer High Fashion) landed on my doorstep. The premise of these toys, as far as I can tell, is “take the same basic technology as all of Satisfyer’s pressure-wave stimulators, but use fancy materials and stick fashion-words on the box.”

I am embarrassed to admit I had to Google the meaning of “Prêt-à-porter.” (It’s “ready to wear,” for anyone curious, which makes zero sense as a name for a sex toy, but let’s run with it.)

What makes the Prêt-à-porter different?

The Satisfyer Prêt-à-porter is a pressure-wave clitoral stimulator, with a vibrating motor added. Function-wise, it’s very similar to the Satisfyer Pro Plus Vibration (an enduring favourite of mine.) And when I say “very similar” what I really mean is “functionally identical” – right down to the same ten vibration settings and the eleven pressure-wace intensity settings.

Aesthetically, the Prêt-à-porter follows the rose-gold-and-white theme that Satisfyer have used a number of times over the years. The main difference – upgrade, if you like – is in the materials used. The underside and nozzle of the toy is silicone as usual, but this silicone feels noticeably softer, smoother and altogether more luxurious than on any of the other Satisfyer products I own. The silicone of the nozzle, i.e. the bit that actually rests against the clitoris in use, is lovely and squishy. The rose-gold accents are listed as being made of “precious metal,” but this is rather non-specific! I’ve seen it suggested that they are aluminium and copper, but have not had this confirmed for sure.

The top side of the toy is coated in white leather. I have mixed views on this. It does look stylish and sleek, there’s no doubt about that. However, leather is also a porous material, meaning it is impossible to get completely clean. The leather part does not actually go against the body in use, but it is inevitable that some lube or sex-fluids will be transferred, and I really question how sanitary this can be in the long-term. I also acknowledge that a lot of people, especially vegetarians and vegans, have complicated feelings around the ethics of leather as a material.

Other important things

The Satisfyer Prêt-à-porter is waterproof, making for easier cleaning as well as allowing you to use it in the bath or shower if you wish. It is USB rechargeable and the charge time is a rather long 4 hours for 60 – 75 minutes of playtime.

Disappointingly, and unlike other Satisfyer pressure-wave toys, the Prêt-à-porter’s nozzle is not removable.

At the higher settings, the Prêt-à-porter is also rather loud.

How did it fare in use?

The first time I used this toy, I had not masturbated or had sex in close to two weeks (recovering from surgery is fun, y’all!) So it is perhaps unsurprising that I reached orgasm in record-quick time. In order to give the Prêt-à-porter a fair trial, I tested it two more times on other occasions.

The shape, angle and softness of the Prêt-à-porter’s head is near-perfect for my clit, surrounding it comfortably. The wider rim of the nozzle also means that when the vibrations and pressure-waves are switched on at the same time, your clit receives both direct stimulation to the glans and indirect stimulation all around it as well.

A quick note on positioning: in order to get the nozzle to sit correctly against your clit, hold the toy with the leather side (the side with the buttons) facing downwards. It took me a minute of experimenting to figure this out.

The Prêt-à-porter’s vibrations are very buzzy. The motor that is in this toy would never, ever be enough to get me off on its own. However, I mind this a lot less when combined with the pressure-wave stimulator, because the vibrations are a nice add-on rather than the main purpose of the toy. Still, stronger and rumblier vibrations would improve this toy no end.

The ability to control the vibrations and pressure-waves separately are key to getting the most out of the Prêt-à-porter. I do wish they’d provided a two-button interface for the vibrations, though. With the pressure-waves you can switch up and down between settings, but with the vibrations you have to scroll all the way through if you want to go back a setting. The buttons are easy to press and give a satisfying “click.”

Despite some flaws, I am very happy to report that the Prêt-à-porter consistently brings me to toe-curling orgasm in just a few minutes!

So is it worth the price difference?

I’m going to say… maybe.

By far the biggest plus-points for me with the Prêt-à-porter are the size, shape and squishiness of the head. This alone has won me over! The aesthetic is nice but I don’t care that much – substance is much more important than style when it comes to the things I put in/on/around my bits. The downsides are the noise and – from a hygiene perspective – the use of leather and non-removable nozzle.

Overall, my experience was positive and I will definitely be using the Prêt-à-porter again. However, it retails for a slightly eye-watering $129.99 and you can get the Pro Plus Vibration for less than half the price. if you’re on a budget I’m not sure there’s truly $75 worth of difference between the two.

Support Coffee & Kink by buying your Satisfyer Luxury Prêt-à-porter from Peepshow Toys.

Thanks to Satisfyer for sending me this product. All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links are used within this post.

Header image for a review of the Satisfyer Men Heat & Vibration

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Men Heat & Vibration Masturbator

Published on by Amy2 Comments

Satisfyer are really churning them out lately, aren’t they? A few weeks after receiving the now-infamous shipment of 7 new toys for vulvas, I received a parcel the other day containing two new penis toys. They seem very similar, so I got rid of one via a Twitter giveaway, and kept the other one to test make Mr CK test. Meet the Satisfyer Men Heat & Vibration Masturbator (hereafter ‘Satisfyer Men Heat’).

Keep your gendered marketing

I’m opposed to gendered marketing of sex toys. Not everyone who has a penis is a man, and not all men have penises! Trans and nonbinary people exist! Unnecessarily gendering toys not only makes trans and NB folks feel ignored and sidelined, it’s also just bad business. Why would you want to alienate a part of your potential customer base? So I was already a bit “ugh” about this product just from the name. But I tried to keep an open mind, I really did.

“A stylish playmate for modern guys”

This is how the Satisfyer Men Heat is described in their marketing copy. I mean… okay, I guess? The colour scheme is black and silver, a minimalistic and stereotypically masculine aesthetic. At first glance, the toy looks like a cross between a portable coffee cup and a torch. One end is closed, and the other is a hole where you insert the penis. The outer is made of ABS plastic, and the fuckable end (sorry, I can’t think how else to describe it) is lined with soft, squishy silicone.

Fuck it, describing this toy is hard, here’s a visual.

The Satisfyer Men Heat & Vibration on a white sheet

The Satisfyer Men Heat features a heating function, which warms the toy to three possible levels, the highest being 104F (about 40C, or slightly over normal body temperature). This is designed to make the experience “breathtakingly realistic” which, one assumes, means “it feels like a vagina”. Then there’s “like a blowjob… but BETTER!” as the box claims. I’m skeptical to say the least, but let’s move on.

Size-wise, it’s got about 2.75″ of penetrable depth (so if you like really deep penetration, this isn’t going to be for you). It’s about 3″ wide, and the hole that you penetrate is around 1.5″.

Close up of the Satisfyer Men Heat & Vibration

The Satisfyer Men Heat is USB rechargeable and fully waterproof.

Settings & controls

The Satisfyer Men Heat has 4 buttons set into a control panel on the front of the toy. The on/off button is at the top and also changes the vibration pattern. Then you have the +/- buttons to change the speed, and lastly the temperature control button. You can set the toy warming without the vibrations being on, so you might want to give it a few minutes to warm up before playing. It starts getting warm very quickly and the instructions say it comes to temperature in five minutes.

This control panel is really where the problems started. The buttons are not raised at all, so you cannot feel for them with your fingers without a visual. They’re also not clearly marked – thin grey markings on a black background! This means it’s basically impossible to see the buttons properly during use unless you’re in very good light and have perfect vision. In low light, forget it. Mr CK also pointed out that this makes the toy really inaccessible to those with any kind of visual impairment.

Additionally, though you are supposed to be able to adjust the heating function, there is no discernible way to tell which heat setting it’s on. You just get the flashing thermometer icon to indicate that the warming function is on.

This toy boasts “70 different vibration combinations”. I’m not sure how the maths works here, given that by my count it has 8 possible speeds and 6 patterns, making a total of 48 possible options. But what do me and my D in GCSE maths know!?

Care and cleaning

About the best thing I can say about this product is that it is body-safe, which is still shockingly rare for penis toys. Standard masturbators like Fleshlights are all made from porous materials such as TPE, which harbour bacteria and are impossible to get completely clean. Fortunately, silicone is non-porous, phthalate-free and 100% safe. At least Satisfyer got THAT right.

As the Satisfyer Men Heat is waterproof, you can clean it with warm water and gentle soap. It’s a bit of a pain to get clean given the shape, but it can be done with a bit of extra care. If you want to share this toy with a non fluid-bonded partner, you can use it while wearing a condom. As always, I recommend water-based lube – and you’re going to need PLENTY of it if you attempt to use this thing.

So how did it work?

The Satisfyer Men Heat & Vibration on a white sheet

“Badly” is, unfortunately, the short and sweet answer. Mr CK was able to fit his penis into the toy with the help of plenty of lube, but he found it uncomfortable. Anyone with a larger than average penis, especially if you’re quite girthy, should avoid this product – you just won’t fit or it’ll hurt! Despite the squishyness of the silicone, it doesn’t have much “give” to make extra room – and one side is completely rigid. This is really a “one size” toy, which doesn’t work at all because penises are so infinitely and gloriously varied. It also makes a squelching noise when you penetrate it, which – while giggle-inducing – is not sexy.

Additionally, the vibrations just didn’t measure up. Even at the highest setting, they’re pretty pathetically weak. Mr CK very quickly concluded that there was zero chance of this toy bringing him anywhere near to orgasm.

When the best your partner can manage is a shrug and an “it’s not… unpleasant?” you know you’re not on to a winning toy.

“But does it feel like fucking a vagina?” I asked. “No,” he said.

“And is it better than a blow job?” “No,” he said again. Never one to waste words.

The verdict

Unfortunately we cannot recommend this product. If you have a penis on the smaller side AND enjoy gentle vibrations, you might get something out of this toy – but otherwise we suggest you spend your money elsewhere. Check out the Godemiche OffBeat, the Hot Octopuss Pulse III or the Hummer wand attachment for some of my most often-recommended penis toys.

Sorry, Satisfyer – I still love you (you’ll have my heart for a while for that amazing flower thing) but seriously, please stop churning things out quite so quickly and develop them more rigorously first.

The Satisfyer Men Heat & Vibration Masturbator retails for $59.95.

Thanks to Satisfyer for sending me this product in exchange for an honest review. All views are, as ever, my own. Pictures are by me. Affiliate links contained within this post make me a small commission if you use them to make a purchase.

Header image for a review of the Satisfyer Yummy Sunshine vibrator

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Yummy Sunshine

Published on by AmyLeave a comment

I, along with many other sex bloggers, recently received a package of seven (7) sex toys from Satisfyer, who have branched out from suction-based toys and now make vibrators too. After a little deliberation, I kept two: the Power Flower, and this one – the Yummy Sunshine.

Bright and cheery…

The Satisfyer Yummy Sunshine vibrator on a white sheet

Long-time readers will be aware of my general aversion to the excessive pinkness of sex toys aimed at people with vulvas. Generally, if there’s a choice between pink and any other colour, I will go for the other colour. One of the reasons I gravitated to the Yummy Sunshine when choosing which Satisfyer toys to keep was the sheer novelty and vibrancy of the BRIGHT yellow colour. Yellow isn’t a colour I particularly love, and this toy honestly makes me think of a banana more than sunshine, but… at least it’s not fucking pink.

Sunshine stats…

The Yummy Sunshine is a fairly large G-spot vibrator. It is 8.75″ in total length, of which 6″ is insertable, and 1.5″ in diameter at the widest insertable point. Given the size, it’s very lightweight.

The Yummy Sunshine vibrator on a black pillow

The Yummy Sunshine has a ribbed shaft and a gentle curve for G-spot stimulation. It also sports what seems to be the Satisfyer vibrator line’s signature ring-handle, which I find comfy and ergonomic to hold. The ring is pretty small, so might be less comfortable for someone with bigger hands.

This toy is USB rechargeable via a magnetic charging pin, and is completely waterproof. It retails for $49.99.

Controls and settings

All Satisfyer’s new vibrators seem to have the same basic control system: a vertical three-button interface, with the on/off button in the centre and the up/down setting change buttons above and below it. It’s a simple and intuitive system to use, and the buttons feel well-placed and easy to press.

The control panel on the Satisfyer Yummy Sunshine vibrator

For some reason, the bottom button is the “up” setting and the top button is the “down” setting, which feels counter-intuitive, so that’s something to be aware of.

Yummy Sunshine has 6 constant vibration speeds and 6 patterns.

Materials & care

The Yummy Sunshine is made of super smooth, super silky silicone. Honestly, the softness and suppleness of the silicone might be the best thing about this product! Silicone is non-porous, non-toxic and free of phthalates or other harmful ingredients, making this toy 100% body-safe.

(I keep promising myself that one day I’ll stop writing this in reviews, since I don’t review unsafe toys… but then I remember that this review might be a reader’s first time visiting this blog, and might even be the first time they’ve ever heard that sex toys can sometimes be unsafe. So long-time readers, if it seems repetitive, I’m sorry – I try to review in such a way that it would make sense to a person who has never owned a sex toy or read a toy review before).

Clean your toy between uses with a body-safe sterile wipe (I get mine in bulk from medical suppliers) or some gentle soap and warm water. To sterilise it more thoroughly, use a 10% bleach solution and then rinse thoroughly (more on cleaning your toys here). If you’re sharing this toy, it’s the ideal shape to use with a condom. As ever, water-based lube is recommended – and you’ll want to use plenty of it for a toy this size.

How does it feel? 

I found this toy enjoyable enough to use, but not perhaps for its intended purpose. I do not like internal vibrations at all – I find them uncomfortable at best, sometimes to the point of painful. My G-spot wants to be stroked, fucked, or left alone – not buzzed, ever.

However, I enjoyed the Yummy Sunshine as a dildo. The gentle ribbed shaft provides lovely stimulation and the curve of the tip is just right to hit my G-spot. The silicone is very soft, and it has a nice flexibility so you can angle it just right.

I also tried it as a clitoral vibrator, which I found fine but not earth-shattering. The vibrations were really neither rumbly enough nor powerful enough for my tastes. I can orgasm with the Yummy Sunshine, but it wouldn’t ever be high up on the list of toys I’d reach for.

The one way in which this toy did really come into its own was when I tried masturbating in a face-down position and grinding on it. The ridges and ripples of the shaft sliding along my vulva felt great.

Do I recommend it?

Overall, I had fun using the Yummy Sunshine, but I was left with the overwhelming impression of a toy that is… just okay. There’s nothing egregiously wrong with it, but it’s nothing to write home about either.

If you’re looking for a mid-price, mid-intensity, ribbed G-spot vibe, this might do the trick for you. But honestly overall I think you can get better toys for your money.

Thanks to Satisfyer for sending me a shipment of toys including the Yummy Sunshine for review. All view are my own. Pics are by me. Affiliate links are used within this post.

Header image for a review of the Satisfyer Power Flower

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Power Flower

Published on by AmyLeave a comment

I came home from my holiday a couple weeks ago to several parcels. One of which was an unexpected treasure-trove from Satisfyer, containing not one, not two, but SEVEN (7) new vibrators. My cup, or something, runneth over. Anyhow. It seems Satisfyer have moved on from just creating suction-based toys, and are now doing a line of more classic vibrators too.

Given the lackluster nature of Satisfyer’s other recent offering (I say lackluster as if I myself didn’t refer to this product as “the worst designed sex toy I have ever had the misfortune to encounter,”) I wasn’t altogether hopeful when it came to testing these out.

That’s why the Power Flower, the first one I pulled out to test on account of its interesting shape, was SUCH a surprise.

This toy is fucking awesome, folks.

Let’s back up a bit and look at some specifics…

The Power Flower is a red silicone vibrator, with a split tip that divides into three “petals”. Like a flower, get it? These petals “flutter” when the vibe is turned on.

The Satisfyer Power Flower viewed from above.

The Power Flower boasts an ergonomic loop-style handle, which fits really well with my small hands. The loop size is 1″ x 1.3″, and I can comfortably fit 2 fingers through it. The toy is 7.5″ in total length (4.75″ insertable, should you choose to do that), and 1.5″ wide at the widest point. It’s fully waterproof and USB rechargeable.

It operates on a simple three-button interface: On/Off, Up, Down. There are six levels of intensity and six different patterns. The buttons are easy to press and the interface is intuitive. The ability to click up or down through settings (rather than having to loop all the way around) is very much appreciated.

The buttons of the Satisfyer Power Flower

Keeping things clean & safe…

This toy is, of course, completely body-safe. The shaft and petals are made entirely of smooth, phthalate-free, non-porous silicone, and part of the handle is made of ABS plastic (also a body-safe material).

The one downside of this shape is the difficulty that cleaning it can present. Bodily fluids and bacteria can easily get trapped between the petals or in the little “dip” between them. So take extra care when cleaning your Flower! This toy is waterproof, so you can either dunk it in a 10% bleach solution or use a sterile medical wipe, followed by warm water and gentle soap, to get it clean.

Due to its shape, you also can’t really effectively use a barrier with this toy. So if you’re sharing it with a non fluid-bonded partner, please make sure it gets a really thorough clean between uses!

The Power Flower in use…

I honestly cannot overstate how much I loved this toy!

I was a bit intimidated to use it with no warm-up (my clit is picky and easily over-stimulated!) So I warmed up with a standard vibrator (a lovely offering from Rocks Off, since I know you were wondering – review coming soon!) and then got down to business with the Power Flower.

Friends, I orgasmed in less than a minute and immediately took to Twitter to be like “FUCKING HELL BUY THIS TOY.”

Okay, let’s back up a bit and talk about how it actually felt. Remember that “Nuzzle Tip” attachment I gushed about months ago? Well, this is sort of like a somewhat gentler version of that. The petals surround your clitoris and, well, flutter against it as they vibrate. As someone who finds direct and very pinpoint clitoral contact uncomfortable (hence why I didn’t like the famed Zumio,) this was an incredible sensation for me. Because it gets the hood, sides and whole area surrounding the clit, it basically encases the whole area in pleasure.

If you’re into very pinpoint stimulation, this toy may not do it for you. But if something a little more indirect is your jam, get your hands (and bits) on one of these!

Great for cocks too!

This toy came out for a second go during a play session with Mr CK. (Having your partner use this toy on your clit during penetrative play – recommend!) He had the bright idea to see how it worked on a cock.

He literally placed the end of the toy over the head of his penis so that the petals were surrounding the head (they’re quite flexible so you can do this!) The reaction when he turned the toy on was… intense and immediate. So, though this toy is designed for vulvas, it’s also a great option if vibrations around the head of your penis are a pleasurable thing for you.

Mr CK did not orgasm from this toy on this occasion but says he feels as though he probably could, with sufficient warm-up.

So do I recommend it?

Oh my god, yes. This toy has gained one of the rare and coveted “basically lives by my bed” spots.

The Power Flower retails for $49.99/£49.99 and is available from SheVibe or Bondara.

Thanks to Satisfyer for sending me this toy to review. All opinions are, as ever, my own. Please use the affiliate links contained in this post, which sends a small commission my way at no extra cost to you!

Header image for a review of the Satisfyer Multifun

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Partner Multifun

Published on by Amy1 Comment

[Update: this product appears, mercifully for genitals everywhere, to have been discontinued.]

Ladies, gentlemen, gentlequeers, non-binary babes and all those in between… behold the worst designed sex toy I have ever had the misfortune of putting near my bits.

I hate being mean about toys. I really do. I always try to find something positive to say. But here, I just… I just can’t.

Satisfyer Multifun: Basic Details

The Satisfyer Multifun, a pink u-shaped vibrator

Anyone else hate this fucking colour? Yeah, me too.

Partner is a subsection of Satisfyer, a company famed for awesome toys like the Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation and the Satisfyer Pro Plus Vibration. That’s why I was so surprised that this offering is such an absolute mess.

The Multifun is a U-shaped toy with two prongs that come almost together at the top. There are two very slight variations – the Multifun 1 is blue and the Multifun 2 is pink, and the ends of the prongs curve in very slightly different ways on each. Again, the difference is tiny.

It contains three motors, one in each of the prongs (which are operated together with a single button) and one in the base (operated separately with a second button). The toy is about 5 inches long in total, 3.5″ being the prongs and 1.5″ the base.

This toy is waterproof and USB rechargeable.

Safe isn’t enough.

The Satisfyer Multifun, a pink u-shaped vibrator

When I ranted to Mr CK about how terrible this toy is, he pointed out that it’s at least a slight improvement on the terrible jelly cock ring I didn’t really review, in that it is body-safe. And yes, it is. It’s coated entirely in smooth silicone, which is phthalate free, non-porous and non-toxic.

But, as I explained to him, at this point I don’t see “body safe” as enough. I see it as a bare fucking minimum. At this point in my career, “this toy is body safe” is up there with “this food didn’t give me food poisoning.” It’s not a glowing recommendation, it’s a basic expectation.

So yes. This toy is body-safe. Can I say anything else positive about it? I’m honestly really struggling.

In Use

The Satisfyer Multifun, a pink u-shaped vibrator, hanging on a purple suction cup dildo stuck to a wall.
Feat. our shower wall and the Blush Ruse Jammy silicone dildo.

On the back of the box, the good folks at Satisfyer have helpfully included diagrams of different ways to use this toy on both a vulva and a penis. Being the dutiful and diligent toy testers that we are, we tried all of them (except the “hang it off your balls” one, because even Mr CK’s tolerance for doing weird shit to his genitals in the name of journalism has its limits).

They were all… equally terrible? Similarly nonsensical?

Pinching it around my clit was mildly painful for the two seconds it stayed on, and then merely annoying as it kept slipping off. Trying to stick it inside me made absolutely no sense whatsoever as it’s entirely the wrong shape to get anywhere near my G-spot, never mind provide pleasurable sensation. Trying to get it to hang off my nipple like a nipple clamp was merely hilarious (and a complete failure). Hanging it around Mr CK’s cock in various configurations produced no greater reaction than “well… that’s kind of in the way”. Even using it as a straightforward clitoral vibrator didn’t work, because the vibrations were so weak and buzzy that I literally Did Not Feel Anything.

I literally described the vibration quality of this toy to a fellow blogger friend as “akin to a single bee buzzing away on my clit. Not even a hive of bees. Just one.”

Other things I hate

The sound. Good God. This thing doesn’t just buzz, it WHINES.

The buttons. They’re small, fiddly and hard to press.

The ridiculously gendered marketing – “for men, women and couples”. (Ah yes, the three genders?) Seriously though, there are so many better ways to market that your product is suitable for different types of bodies. The diagrams of possible ways to use it with different genital configurations is more than enough. And EVERYTHING can be a toy for couples if you use it with a partner. And as if this wasn’t bad enough, it comes in two colours – baby blue (Multifun 1) and pastel pink (Multifun 2). You know, in case you don’t know which one is for you, they’ve colour coded them for you!

In conclusion…

I hate this toy. I hate it with a burning passion that surprises me. I have never hated a sex toy this much (no, not even the stupid jelly cockring/headlamp, because at least we KNEW that was going to be terrible, and that didn’t have a nearly $50 price tag).

I implore you, do not buy this toy. Your bits deserve better. For a pinpoint clitoral vibrator, get the Blush Nocturnal. For a decent vibrating cock ring, get the Hot Octopuss Atom. For a great toy to wear during penetrative sex, get the We-Vibe Sync.

Satisfyer: I still love you. But you dropped the ball on this one. For God’s sake, do better, and test your products on actual humans before you mass produce them.

Thank you to Satisfyer for sending me this product to review. If for some reason you still want to try it, it retails for $49.95. This toy sucked but their other products are great! Affiliate links are used within this post.


Header for Satisfyer Pro 4 Couples review

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Pro 4 Couples

Published on by AmyLeave a comment

Update: this product has, I am pleased to say, been discontinued!

I try really hard not to be prejudiced against a toy before it’s even been anywhere near my bits. But I have to admit there was a part of me that hated the Satisfyer Pro 4 Couples on sight. Perhaps that’s why it’s languished at the bottom of my “to be reviewed” pile for six months.

My bias is a little bit because I get pissed off when “for couples” is used interchangeably with “to be used during penis-in-vagina intercourse,” as if that’s the only type of sex couples have. (And, indeed, as if a “couple” always consists of one penis-haver and one vagina-haver.) It’s a little bit because I hate the late-nineties text-s peak tweeness of “4” instead of “for”. And it’s a lot because I took one look at this fucking thing and went “there is no way that’s gonna be effective”.

Facts ‘n’ Figures

The Satisfyer Pro 4 Couples is one of the models in Satisfyer’s new generation line, which also includes the G Spot Rabbit (which I quite enjoyed) and the Pro Plus Vibration (which I adored). It’s V-shaped, clearly vaguely modeled after other wearable-during-intercourse vibes such as the We-Vibe Sync (which I recently reviewed for Sex Tech Guide). It utilises Satisfyer’s signature contactless stimulation via rapid pulses of air or “pressure waves”.

There’s a large bulky part which sits against the vulva and houses the pressure wave/suction clitoral stimulator. The second arm is shorter, very slim and flexible, and is designed to sit inside the vagina and vibrate.

This toy boasts two separate motors. The clitoral stimulator has 11 different levels of intensity, and the internal arm has 10 vibration patterns. They are controlled by separate buttons and can be used together or independently.

The Pro 4 Couples is fully waterproof and USB rechargeable. It retails for $99.99 on Lovehoney USA. At time of writing it is not available through the UK site.

Care & cleaning of your Satisfyer…

Like all Satisfyer products, the Pro 4 Couples is body-safe. The exterior is matte silicone, the buttons are plastic, and the silicone nozzle end is removable for easier cleaning. Being waterproof, you can submerge it to clean it fully, or use a medical wipe for a quick clean-up. It’s not really condom/barrier compatible.

As always, I recommend water-based lube for silicone toys.

What I did like

No toy is all bad. (Scratch that: some toys are all bad). It would be unfair not to acknowledge the Pro 4 Couples’ good points, even though the overall product didn’t work for me.

I really like the air pressure technology Satisfyer use for their clitoral stimulators. It provides intense pleasure without numbing, and this toy is no exception.

I also liked that you can control the clitoral arm and the internal arm separately. I hate vibrations inside my vagina, so being able to turn them off was a godsend.

What I didn’t like

Literally everything else?

Though I’m sure it will work for some people, this product just feels really badly designed to me. For one thing, it doesn’t stay in place! I struggled to get it to stay on my clitoris without using my hands when I was using it solo and staying very still. There is absolutely no way this thing would remain in position during any sort of thrusting..

Secondly, I found the internal arm not only provided no pleasure but was actually painful! This is quite a feat considering how small it is. It tapers to a point for some reason, and when I put the toy in the right position so that the suction nozzle was over my clitoris, this pointy end poked painfully into the wall of my vagina.

Third, there’s no way I could get a penis inside me alongside this toy. I tried valiantly with a dildo (a small dildo!) and it just made the painful poking feeling worse.

Finally, the internal vibrations are buzzy as fuck. I tried them on my clit, just for fun, and I was going numb within a few seconds.

I’m willing to accept that this toy might work well for some people as a solo toy, if their vulva happens to be shaped in exactly the right way to fit with it, but as a toy for wearing during intercourse it’s simply not fit for purpose.

Needless to say, I don’t recommend it. But what should you get instead?

If you’re looking for a pressure wave clitoral stimulator for solo use, get the Satisfyer Pro Plus Vibration. For dual clitoral suction and G-spot stimulation, get the We-Vibe Nova. Or for a toy to use for clitoral pleasure during intercourse, get the We-Vibe Sync.

I can see what Sayisfyer were going for with the Pro 4 Couples, but it just misses the mark in so many different ways. A really disappointing offering from a manufacturer I usually like.

Thanks to Satisfyer for sending me this product in exchange for an honest review. All opinions mine, etc. If you want to support me, please buy me a coffee or shop using the affiliate links in this post and the right hand sidebar.

Header image for a review of the Satisfyer Pro Plus Vibration

[Toy Review] Satisfyer Pro Plus Vibration

Published on by AmyLeave a comment

Spoiler alert: in my eyes (and cunt) at least, this toy is pretty dang close to perfection.

Hello darlings! It’s time for another installment of “Amy puts things on her junk and then writes about it,” AKA a sex toy review.

After a rocky start with the original Pro 2, Satisfyer have won me over with some of their newer products. You may remember the G Spot Rabbit, which I reviewed recently. Well, now it’s time for the next new offering: the Satisfyer Pro Plus Vibration.

The Pro Plus Vibration boasts the Satisfyer suction wave stimulation we know and love… but with this iteration, they’ve added vibrations into the mix. And ohhhhh godddddd, y’all. I love it. I love it so much.

Before I gush (heh) too much, let’s take a closer look…

The Pro Plus Vibration is a curved toy (shaped a bit like a banana!) and about 6 inches long. It has 11 suction intensity settings as well as 10 vibration settings (3 constant speeds and 7 patterns). These are controlled independently with two separate buttons.

It works by creating a kind of vacuum around the clitoris with a silicone nozzle, and stimulating it via rapid pulses of air. The difference with this version is that the nozzle also vibrates.

The Pro Plus Vibration is fully waterproof and uses a magnetic USB charger.  It is unfortunately a little loud in use, but my partner said he couldn’t hear it from the next room when the door was closed.

Okay. Can I gush now?

The first thing to note is that this latest offering from Satisfyer brought me to orgasm much quicker than any of their previous lines. Yes, the vibration really does make that much of a difference.

I don’t think my clit has ever been quite so happy since the first time I introduced it to the Doxy. I came so hard I’m pretty sure I woke the neighbours.

My Ratings (all scores out of 5★)

Price: ★★★★
The Pro Plus Vibration retails for $54.95 at SheVibe. In my opinion it is good value for money – and all Satisfyer toys come with a 10-year manufacturer’s warranty for peace of mind.

Materials: ★★★★★
The whole toy is coated in smooth, silky silicone, which is both body-safe and lovely to the touch. The accents are plastic.

Appearance: ★★★★
I quite like the white-with-rose-gold-accents aesthetic of the new Satisfyer line. They’re minimalistic and stylish, as well as standing out by virtue of being so unusual. This one really reminds me of a medical device, even more than the last one did, which… yeah, I have some Kink Feelings about that.

Ease of Use: ★★★★
The curved shape is really ergonomic and fit neatly into my (tiny) hand. The buttons are super easy to press and the controls intuitive – you control the pressure waves with the main up/down button, and the vibrations with a separate smaller button. My only complaint here is that you can only cycle one way through the vibration settings. This isn’t a huge problem for me as I’m a “put it on high and leave it there” kind of girl, but it’s something to be aware of if you like to switch through settings.

Ease of care & cleaning: ★★★
The Pro Plus Vibration is silicone and waterproof, so you can wipe it down with a sterile wipe (I recommend buying from medical suppliers) or submerge it in water to clean it thoroughly. The silicone nozzle tip also detaches from the part with the motor, so you could boil this piece separately to sterilise it completely.

Previous Satisfyer lines such as the Pro 2 have included spare nozzles, and I do wish they also put these in with the newer products. Being able to swap out nozzles would be a real plus in the safer sex department.  As with all suction toys, it’s not really possible to use them with a barrier.

Versatility: ★★★★
The Pro Plus Vibration has 10 different vibration settings and 11 suction settings, which you can control independently of each other. It’s also waterproof, in case using toys in the bath is your jam.

Intensity: ★★★★
Full disclosure: if this toy was only a vibrator, I might give it 3 stars for intensity. The vibrations alone aren’t super strong and are a little on the buzzy side on the higher settings. But the vibration is secondary to the suction stimulation, and is just the right level of intensity to be a nice add-on without distracting from the main event. The suction itself is the most intense I’ve yet experienced on any Satisfyer toy, and made my clit very happy indeed.

Overall Score: ★★★★★
Despite some minor flaws, I’m giving this toy five out of five because it just gave me one of the best damn orgasms I’ve had in a really long time.

Thanks to the folks at Satisfyer for sending me their new products in exchange for an honest review! Please support me by buying through the affiliate links in this post.

Image is property of Satisfyer and reproduced with permission.