Fun fact, since I asked the internet and now you get to know the answer too: apparently a “teddy” is basically the same as a bodysuit, only “a little bit sexier”. Now you know.
With that said, let’s take a look.
Dark Orchid Teddy: Style and Aesthetics
The Dark Orchid Teddy is a one-piece lingerie item made from the same mix of midnight blue satin (polyester/elastane) and black eyelash lace (polyamide/polyester) as everything in this range. The gusset is made of vagina-friendly 100% cotton. It features a plunging neckline with lace-up detailing, halterneck straps that cross at the back, and a tie-up waistband.
I really love the shape of this one. I often find myself drawn to teddy/bodysuit style pieces because I think they just suit my shape really well. They also tend to be a little more forgiving for very big boobs, whereas more structured pieces take one look at my G-cups and go “lol no”. (More on the fit and boob room in a minute!) The high cut makes my admittedly rather short legs look a little longer, and the waistband accentuates one of the parts of my body I’m most comfortable with.
The midnight blue shade is gorgeous, as is the delicate and feminine eyelash lace.
Fit and Comfort
The Dark Orchid Teddy comes in a range of sizes, ranging from UK6 to UK28. Even in just the few years I’ve been working with them, Lovehoney have massively expanded their plus-size lingerie options and I’m really loving seeing more inclusive size options as standard. Because everyone deserves beautiful lingerie!
I received the Medium (UK10/12) and, overall, it fits my size 12 body pretty well. If anything it’s a little on the small side, so maybe size up if you’re between sizes for this one. This is especially important if you have wider hips or a big butt, because you have to ease this one up over your body very carefully to avoid tearing the delicate lace. There’s not much give or stretch in it!
Comfort wise, the satin is lovely and soft and the lace is non-scratchy. I often shy away from lace-heavy pieces because I’m very sensitive to rough or scratchy fabrics, but this one is fine.
The Dark Orchid Teddy is adjustable in a couple of places. You can tie up the waistband as tightly or loosely as you like, and you can also change the length of the straps using the sliders. (Pro tip: do this before you put the teddy on. It’s near goddamn impossible unless you’re a contortionist once it’s on!)
The biggest downside, unfortunately, comes down once again to boob space. I’m not sure if it’s due to the spaghetti straps or the flimsiness of the lace, but this really doesn’t keep them in place very well. It seems fine when I first put it on but, as soon as I move or bend forwards or lie on my side, everything falls out. This means that I find myself adjusting it every few seconds and ultimately not feeling as comfortable and sexy as I’d like.
I’m a little mixed on this one. The style and fabrics are gorgeous, and I love the cut and shape. But it’s really not the friendliest for bigger busted folks.
I think, reluctantly, I’m likely to pass this on to one of my smaller-boobed femme friends. It’s gorgeous, it’s just not a great fit for my body.
The Dark Orchid Teddy retails for £34.99.
Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the Dark Orchid Teddy to review. All opinions are, as always, my own.