If you’re just joining me now, I am midway through my semi-annual quest to review every item in one of Lovehoney’s adult advent calendars. Specifically the Lovehoney x Womanizer 24 Day Couples’ Advent Calendar, which retails for £149 at Lovehoney UK and $199 at Lovehoney US and contains £457/$530 worth of products.
Ready for Day 14?
Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2024 Day #14: Menthol Pleasure Balm
Today’s item is a 7g tin of Lovehoney’s menthol pleasure balm. This item isn’t sold separately in this form but it’s pretty similar to the Bliss Orgasm Balm, which I love and use regularly.
Product Info
In a nutshell, pleasure balm or orgasm balm is designed to be applied to the external genitals, especially the clitoris. The ingredients provide a tingling sensation and may encourage blood flow, promoting greater sensitivity.
The Menthol Pleasure Balm contains a pretty long list of ingredients, but most of them give me no cause for concern. It does contain propylparaben, and some people like to avoid parabens entirely for understandable reasons. However, according to a report by the Scientific Committee on Consumer Safety, “the SCCS has concluded that propylparaben is safe when used as a preservative in cosmetic products up to a maximum concentration of 0.14%.” I’m not a scientist, of course, but I would conclude from this data that the tiny amount in this product is unlikely to do you any harm.
Unfortunately this balm contains beeswax, so it is not vegan.
Pros
7g doesn’t sound like a very big tin, but you really don’t need a lot to get the effects so you’ll get a good few uses out of this
Genuinely works! I have had several tins of this stuff over the years and I love it. It really does enhance sensitivity (it’s not a magic orgasm spell, though, so keep your expectations realistic!)
Some of the plant-based oils and other ingredients may have beneficial properties for skin
Cons
Not vegan due to beeswax
Oily consistency can make clean-up a bit annoying
Strong minty scent may be unpleasant to some people
Verdict
I still really like this stuff, though I think personally I’ll be sticking to the vegan, paraben-free version.
Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the 24 day Lovehoney x Womanizer Sex Toy Advent Calendar to review. All views are mine (with occasional input from Mr C&K!) Affiliate links appear in this post.
In a nutshell, a clitoral stimulation cream (/gel/balm/oil/etc.) is a substance that you apply to the clitoris and surrounding area. The ingredients work to enhance pleasure, create additional sensations such as tingling and warming, and boost sensitivity. They’re a great tool for people who struggle with arousal difficulties or loss of sensitivity, or just for anyone who wants to experience heightened arousal or more pleasure. They also have some great potential applications in kink and BDSM scenarios, particularly around orgasm control and forced orgasm.
Pulse Clitoral Stimulation Cream: What’s In It?
Image: Shevibe/Vibeology
You probably know by now that when it comes to any product that goes directly on the genitals, the first place I look is the ingredients list. So what’s in Vibeology Clitoral Stimulation Cream and is it safe and body-friendly?
Purified water
Aloe Barbadensis (Aloe Vera) leaf juice: A natural and safe ingredient which also has positive skincare benefits such as hydrating and irritation-reducing
Dimethiconol: A silicone-based liquid polymer that is used as a skin conditioner and to improve viscosity in silicone-based products. As it is a large molecule, it does not penetrate the skin and is likely a safe ingredient.
Polysorbate 20: A surfactant and emulsifier which studies have determined to be safe.
Squalane: Squalene (note the spelling) is an oil that is traditionally taken from shark livers but can also be derived from plant sources. It has been a popular ingredient in skincare products for many years thanks to its hydrating and anti-inflammatory properties. Squalane is just a slightly different form of squalene. Animal-based squalane is not only cruel, but also environmentally unfriendly and unsustainable. I reached out to Vibeology’s team and their development chemist confirmed that they use plant-based squalane from olives.
Hydroxyethylcellulose: A plant-derived gelling and thickening agent that seems to be safe.
PEG-16 Macadamia glycerides: A liquid emollient derived from macadamia nut oil and considered to be safe for cosmetic use.
Mentha Piperita (peppermint) leaf oil: An essential oil derived from the peppermint plant and safe in small quantities. Provides a cooling and tingling sensation, which is why you so often see it in this type of product.
Bisabolol: A safe plant-based skin soothing extract, primarily from chamomile.
Tocopherol acetate: A pure form of Vitamin E that is safe and commonly appears in skincare products.
Zanthoyxlum Bungeanum extract: An extract from Sichuan peppers that finds use in both food and skincare and does not appear to have any negative effects.
Cucumis Sativus extract: An extract from the cucumber plant that can be soothing to the skin and also adds to the product’s scent.
Citric acid: A preservative that is harmless in small quantities.
I have no concerns about Vibeology Pulse Clitoral Stimulation Cream from a body-safety perspective.
Sensory Properties
Vibeology Pulse Clitoral Stimulation Cream comes in a small and easy-to-use pump top bottle.
This product has a noticeably lighter scent than many of the similar products I’ve tried. Some of them are almost overwhelmingly minty. So if you are sensitive to scents, this might be a good alternative to consider. It’s still minty, but it’s light and pleasant.
Initially, I really loved the feel of this cream. It feels silky-smooth and massages into my skin easily. However, I quickly noticed that it was feeling pretty sticky. After I’d applied it I was left with a tacky, oily residue on my fingers that I needed to wash off quickly.
This stuff also tastes vile. Most of the arousal gels, creams and oils I’ve tried have had a distinctive but not unpleasant taste (except that one that tasted like inhaling perfume!) For some reason, though, Vibeology Pulse Clitoral Stimulation Cream has a really nasty, chemically taste that I couldn’t get out of my mouth. Don’t use this for oral, is what I’m saying here.
So far, so… not great. But did it achieve the desired effect?
Does It Work?
For me? Not really.
I’ve used quite a few products like this, and they have varying levels of effectiveness. This one produced a slight tingling, but very little else and its effects wore off very quickly. I applied more, and the same thing happened. Overall, really disappointing.
Vibeology’s website claims this product is “compatible with pleasure objects,” by which I assume they mean sex toys. The presence of dimethiconol, a silicone, makes me hesitant about using it with silicone toys. With the tiny quantities you need, it’s probably fine, but I recommend doing a patch-test first so you don’t accidentally ruin your favourite silicone toy.
Due to the various oils, don’t use this one with barriers such as condoms or dams as it can degrade or damage them.
Verdict
Meh. I was underwhelmed by this one, especially after liking Vibeology’s lube so much. Unfortunately, it just… didn’t really work. I’ll be publishing a full buying guide to clitoral stimulation creams, gels and oils in the coming months, but in the interim I suggest these alternatives:
Pulse Clitoral Stimulation Cream retails for $21/£17 for 30ml.
Thanks to Shevibe for sending me this clitoral stimulation cream to test and review! All views and experiences are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post and shopping with them sends me a small commission at no additional cost to you.
Whenever I encounter a sex-related thing I haven’t tried before, I immediately want to try it (and tell my readers all about it, obviously.) That’s why, when For Play Couples’ Chocolate came across my social feed recently, I immediately fired off an email to founder Victoria to enquire about featuring them on my blog.
She was kind enough to send me some samples of her company’s products to try. We decided to publish this review today in celebration of World Chocolate Day.
Sex and chocolate are, after all, two of life’s greatest pleasures.
So What is For Play Chocolate?
For Play Chocolate came about when Victoria – a former CMO with an MBA – began to research the issue of sustaining intimacy in a long-term relationship. Drawing on research from an array of experts including Dr Karen Gurney and Emily Nagoski, PhD, she decided to create a product to “remind couples to make time for intimacy and play.”
Known variously as couples’ chocolate, sex chocolate, horny chocolate, and aphrodisiac chocolate, For Play Chocolate kits are designed to help couples to connect, get in the mood for romance, and enjoy greater levels of intimacy.
Each box of For Play Chocolates comes with six chocolates (three for each partner) and six “Play Cards”. The cards offer suggestions for erotic experiences to try, from taking a sexy shower together to experimenting with food play. There are also question prompts you can use to help you connect, reflect, and learn more about each other and your relationship.
The chocolates are labelled “His” and “Hers”, and there are boxes available for same-gender or different-gender couples. I’d love to see a non-binary or genderless version added to the range in the future, if possible.
They come beautifully packaged in sleek and stylish boxes in either pink, purple, or green. The chocolates themselves are beautiful, too, decorated with pink and bronze edible shimmer. The overall first impression is of luxury and high quality.
For Play’s products are vegan and made using ethically sourced 62% Ecuadorian dark chocolate. Their supplier is Original Beans chocolate, rated as a leading company by Chocolate Scorecard for environmental, sustainability, and labour practices.
How Does It Work?
For Play’s chocolate is super delicious, combining the sweet-bitter combo of quality dark chocolate with the infusion of subtle, natural botanical flavours. It melts smoothly in the mouth and the popping candy leaves a fun tingling sensation in its wake.
But how does it work?
Mr C&K had a long chat about this when we sampled our chocolates, and we came to the conclusion that this product works in two main ways. I’m going to call them “direct” and “indirect.”
The Direct Effects: The Science Bit
The direct way that For Play Chocolate works is through its botanical and adaptogenic ingredients. To understand this better, we need to delve into the science a little bit.
An aphrodisiac, in the most basic sense, is “a food or drug that arouses sexual instinct, brings on desire, or increases sexual pleasure or performance” (Healthline.) Numerous foods, from oysters to strawberries and even hot chilli peppers, have been alleged to be aphrodisiacs throughout history.
Another common food thought to have aphrodisiac properties? Dark chocolate.
Little to no concrete scientific evidence directly links most common aphrodisiac foods to an increase in sexual desire. However, this doesn’t mean there is nothing to the concept at all. Experts have attempted to explain aphrodisiacs’ apparent benefits through various means, from simple placebo to the sensual pleasure of consuming delicious things, the “luxury” status that society affords some of these foods, and the impact on bodily functions that play a role in sexual activity and desire (such as blood flow and dopamine release.)
Some foods and edible compounds, therefore, may play a role in sexual functioning in various ways. Let’s look at the active ingredients in For Play’s couples’ chocolate and what the research has to say about them.
Dark Chocolate
Dark chocolate is rich in both antioxidants and caffeine, both of which can improve blood flow. It also contains L-arginine, which may enhance sexual responsiveness. A 2021 systematic review suggested that “l-arginine, as part of a combination product, may be considered for the treatment of women with Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder, regardless of age.” (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder or HSDD is, broadly, a lack of sexual desire or very low desire that causes distress or negatively impacts your life.) Consuming chocolate also triggers the release of chemicals such as endorphins and dopamine, which are associated with feelings of happiness and wellbeing.
Maca
Maca, which comes from the Peruvian maca root plant, has long been thought to boost fertility and sex drive. One 2002 study indicated an improvement in self-perception of sexual desire in men after 8 weeks of maca use. Another pilot investigation also indicated that treatment with maca extract increased sexual desire amongst male athletes. Maca is only in For Play’s “For Him” chocolates, as there is currently more evidence for its effectiveness in (cis) men.
Ashwagandha
Ashwagandha is a herb that originated in India and has been utilised in various ways for centuries. A 2015 pilot study showed that ashwagandha root extract could improve sexual functioning in otherwise healthy cis women. Another 2022 study indicated that treatment with ashwagandha provided a “statistically significant improvement” in sexual functioning amongst women with HSDD. Ashwagandha is in For Play’s “For Her” chocolates.
Fenugreek
Fenugreek, a clover-like herb that belongs to the pea family, finds use in both cooking and herbal medicines. One study found that “Sexual function analysis for all women… found that treatment with fenugreek resulted in reported increases in sexual arousal and desire in women” (Tester, 2015.) Another double-blinded and placebo-controlled 2021 study found that fenugreek “offered significant beneficial effects to sexual problems” amongst its female participants.
Korean ginseng
Ginseng is a vasodilator, or something that opens the blood vessels. By increasing blood flow in this way, it can have sexual benefits such as helping with erectile dysfunction. A small 2002 study and a 2008 systematic review found “suggestive evidence for the effectiveness of red ginseng in treating ED.” Likewise, a placebo-controlled double blind 2010 study found that “Oral administration of KRG extracts improved sexual arousal in menopausal women.”
In a Nutshell…
A product like For Play Chocolate is a helping hand, not a magic bullet. If you’re stressed out, angry at your partner, or suffering from the sexual side effects of health problems or medication, it isn’t going to magically override all that and make you horny. No food or substance can, because human sexuality is way more complicated than that.
What its ingredients can do, though, is give your body a natural nudge in the right direction. Combined with creating the right conditions for pleasure and intimacy – which we’ll discuss more in the next section – these adaptogenic ingredients can work with your body to enhance intimacy and pleasure.
For Play notes that you should seek medical advice before using their products if you are pregnant, breastfeeding, or taking any medications. And, of course, you should avoid this product if you are allergic or sensitive to any of the ingredients.
The Indirect Effects: Finding New Ways to Stay Connected
The indirect way that For Play Chocolate works is all about creating the time, space, and physical and emotional context for greater intimacy in your relationship.
Sex, after all, is mental at least as much as physical. In her life-changing book Come As You Are, Emily Nagoski writes extensively about the devastating impact that life stress, mental health challenges, lack of trust, lack of emotional safety, and feelings of pressure can have on sexual desire. To connect better with our partners and ourselves, we need to reduce stress, feel safe and seen, and make space for desire and pleasure.
Staying connected and keeping intimacy, passion, and sex going in a long-term relationship can be challenging. New relationship energy (NRE) naturally fades over time into the more comfortable, cosy warmth of long-term love. This is particularly true when you’re married or nested, your lives are very entangled, or you’re raising children together.
It is important for couples to set time aside to focus on each other and their relationship. Exploration, adventure, and trying new things can all help to keep the spark of novelty alive. With those things and a little effort, the long haul can be where the really good stuff is. There’s nothing like completely knowing someone and them knowing you inside and out, and choosing each other every day.
Using a product like For Play Couples’ Chocolate can help you to create that all-important time together. It can facilitate the conditions needed for intimacy of all kinds – including sexual, physical, and emotional – to flourish.
For Play Couples’ Chocolate is really a date night in a box. You get to set aside dedicated time for your relationship, enjoy some tasty treats together, and explore new ways of connecting. There are even some suggested Spotify playlists to help set the mood.
I found the question cards particularly great for this aspect of the experience. The question prompts sparked some interesting discussions and also plenty of laughter. Even seemingly simple questions (“What does intimacy mean to you?” was my favourite) can get you thinking and talking about things in a different way.
Verdict
I really enjoyed this product, which is far more than just a gimmick. A lot of thought and care has gone into the formulation and creation of For Play’s kits. The quality of the chocolate, ethical credentials, and beautiful presentation really elevates them, too.
For Play Chocolates retail for £28 per kit. That’s less than you’d pay for a meal in a mid-range restaurant or about what you’d pay for a couple of drinks in a nice bar. Since you only need one chocolate each time, you’ll get three experiences out of one box. And, of course, you can continue to use the cards for as long as you like.
A thoughtful (and tasty) romantic gift or a cute way to set aside a little “us time” with your partner. There’s also a 30 day satisfaction guarantee with your purchase.
Thanks to For Play Chocolate for sending me this product to test and sponsoring this review. All views are, as always, mine. Professional product images by For Play and reproduced here with permission.
I love reviewing sex toys, of course, but sometimes I find I want to do something a bit different. To that end, you’ll be seeing a few more wide-ranging reviews coming out over the next few weeks and months, starting with today’s.
I recently received a shipment from products from Aphrodisia, Bijoux Indiscrets‘ new range of scented products that includes (amongst others) a massage candle, a body mist, massage gels, and this “clitoral arousal balm” or orgasm enhancer.
What is Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer?
An orgasm enhancer is a balm or gel that you apply to your genitals – in this case, the clitoris – to increase sensitivity. At least in theory and for some people, they can improve the likelihood, speed, frequency, and intensity of orgasms.
The Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer is a water-based product that contains a long list of primarily plant-based ingredients. I Googled the ones I’m not familiar with, and they are all generally regarded as safe for cosmetic use. (Though I don’t love the use of “parfum”, which is non-specific and can refer to any combination of over 3000 ingredients. This is standard practice for cosmetics and personal care products, unfortunately.) If you have allergies or sensitivities, always check the ingredients list carefully.
In terms of active ingredients, I suspect the menthyl lactate is doing a lot of the work in this product. Derived from menthol, this ingredient is commonly used as a cooling agent in cosmetics and provides a tingly sensation when applied to the skin. This effect is particularly strong on sensitive areas much as the genitals, and the clitoris in particular.
All the products in this range are so beautifully packaged, with a black and gold colour scheme and floral motifs. Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer comes in a small tube that resembles a lipgloss or mascara and has a pump top applicator.
Like all of Bijoux’s products, the Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer is vegan.
A Word About Expectations
It’s worth pointing out that an orgasm enhancer is not a magic bullet. The right one can boost sensitivity and responsiveness and can help you to experience more intense sensations. There might even be a little bit of a placebo effect going on: you think the balm is going to help, so it does.
However, an orgasm enhancer (no matter how good) cannot overcome many of the issues that can get in the way of pleasure and orgasm – stress, anxiety, depression, body image struggles, physical pain or discomfort, lack of trust or safety in a relationship, poor communication, or sexual acts that simply don’t work for you.
All this to say, go in with realistic expectations. An orgasm enhancer isn’t going to cure all your sexual woes. What it might be able to do is help you to experience more pleasure, transform a good experience into a great one, or give you that little extra push to get over the edge of climax.
Smell, Taste and Feel
Bijoux Indiscrets’ Aphrodisia range has a distinctive scent that all the products share. I’ll be delving into this in more detail next week when I review the Body Mist from the same range. It’s a pleasant, floral-yet-sexy scent made up primarily of rose, ylang ylang, and jasmine.
I have mixed views about using something perfumed on my genitals. I’m generally averse to doing so because a lot of the ingredients that go into scents aren’t necessarily the healthiest for a vulva. You only need a tiny amount of Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer to get the effects though, and it’s only used externally, so it is probably fine. I have used it several times now and haven’t experienced any irritation or other issues.
The scent lingers long after application, so you might want to have a bath or a wash afterwards (or, honestly, just go around smelling of flowers all day – the scent is lovely enough that you absolutely can, and no-one who caught a whiff of it would know it was a sex product.)
The Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer is white in colour and has a thin texture that reminds me of water-based lube. It’s not oily or sticky, and once it is massaged in it doesn’t leave any unpleasant tacky feeling or residue.
I will say that you probably don’t want to use this stuff for oral sex. You know when you spritz on perfume and then breathe in at the wrong moment or realise your mouth was open a bit and you can sort of taste it? Yeah, it tastes like that.
So… Does It Work?
I tried the Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer at a time when I was kind of desiring pleasure and orgasm, but really struggling to actually access these things (trying to have sex or masturbate while getting through the worst heartbreak of your life is a fucking ride, y’all.)
When I applied Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer to my clit, I started noticing its effects almost immediately. Within 30 seconds there was a noticeable warming, tingling sensation. The sensation was enjoyable and pulled my attention straight to my clit. It’s not exactly a magical “instant horny” contoction, but it took my arousal level from “I feel like an orgasm might be nice in theory but I’m not sure I can be bothered” to “yes I would like to cum now please.”
The effect lasted well, meaning I did not need to reapply it. If you were having a lengthy sex or masturbation session, you might want to top it up occasionally, but you only need a little bit to get the effect.
In terms of the effect it had on my orgasm, the Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer definitely worked! It boosted my sensitivity and made me even more eager to be touched. I also found it helped me to get wet, which has been a challenge recently.
Was it a miracle cure for the intrusive thoughts that keep popping into my head when I’m trying to get off? No, of course not. But did it help me to push through and get out of my head and into my body at least a little bit. It also helped me to reach orgasm more quickly than I’ve been able to recently.
Pro tip: I find that Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer pairs particularly well with clitoral suction toys!
Verdict
If you don’t mind the noticeable floral scent, this stuff is excellent! Clitoral balms have a pretty much permanent place in my easy grab-basket of sex supplies, and this is a worthy addition to the collection.
Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me the Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer to try. All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.
One of the fun things about being both a femme and a sex blogger at this time of year is seeing all the sweet, cutesy, pink-and-hearts-and-flowers themed products that companies are putting out for Valentine’s Day. Bijoux Indiscrets were kind enough to send me this year’s Valentine’s offering from their range: the Bubblegum Play Kit.
Bijoux Indiscrets Bubblegum Play Kit
The Bubblegum Play Kit contains three products: a warming massage oil, a full-body massage gel that doubles as a water-based lube, and a lipgloss. Each one is scented and flavoured like bubblegum. All three products, like everything in Bijoux’s range, are vegan.
The kit came packaged in a cute pink box with a heart on the front, much like the packaging you might get on a gift set of cosmetics or bath products. The overall effect, like the products themselves, is sweet to the point of saccharine. But how did the contents stack up? Let’s take a closer look at each item.
Warming Massage Oil
This isn’t really an oil in the true sense of the word. As far as I can tell, it doesn’t actually contain any oil at all. It’s really a water-based gel that warms as you massage it in. Still, we’ll call it “massage oil” to distinguish it from the other massage product in this kit.
For me, it takes about a minute to feel the massage oil warming on my skin. You’ll get a more intense warming sensation if you blow gently on it.
I found that it didn’t really blend or get fully absorbed into the skin the way some massage oils do. Instead, it tends to linger on the surface. This can be a good thing, as a little bit goes a long way and there’s no need to keep reapplying it. However, it can also be a problem if you don’t enjoy the feeling of having oil or gel lingering on your skin.
This is by far the nicest tasting of the three products. It’s very, very, very sweet, so you’ll want to know that going on. That sweetness is likely due to its first ingredient: glycerin. Due to the glycerin, I found that my hands and skin felt quite sticky after using it and I wanted to wash it off.
Stickiness aside, though, this is a fine massage gel and the sweet bubblegum taste and pink aesthetic gives it a fun and playful vibe.
You can buy this gel separately for €22. It’s also available in caramel & sea salt and strawberry & honey flavours.
Full Body Massage Gel/Lube
According to Bijoux Indiscrets, this water-based massage gel can double up as an intimate lubricant. It has quite a long list of ingredients, so you’ll want to review it carefully to make sure there’s nothing you’re sensitive to.
I can’t see anything alarming in the ingredients, but I’m also not enough of an expert to declare them all definitely fine. At the very least this gel/lube contains no glycerin or parabens, though it does contain “Aroma” (artificial fragrance/flavour) which is not very specific and can include any number of things.
I do quite like the feeling of this one. It’s somewhere between a thick liquid and a thin gel, and it spreads across the skin nicely and lasts well. However, unlike the massage oil, this gel tastes really unpleasant to me. Instead of sweetness, it’s got a horrible chemical-y taste. I’m quite sensitive to artificial sweeteners and I can really, really taste them in this.
I probably won’t finish this one, honestly. I’m “meh” on flavoured lubes to begin with and this isn’t a nice tasting one.
Oral Pleasure Lip Gloss
This lip gloss is more subtly flavoured than the other two products in the set, but still has a distinctive bubblegum flavour. It’s not quite as sweet as the massage oil (which is probably a good thing for a product that goes directly on your mouth!)
After you apply it, you start getting a tingling sensation thanks to the peppermint oil it contains. I think, based on the name, the idea is that you put it on and then perform oral sex with it. I haven’t had the opportunity to try that but I did try putting a bit on my vulva, just to see what the effect would be. It gave a kinda pleasurable tingly, warming feeling a bit like a warming lube or menthol pleasure balm. So that effect might translate if you used it during oral?
The warming and tingling is really noticeable on my lips, to the point that it becomes uncomfortable if I use too much. You really only need a little bit of this one.
This lipgloss lasts well and gives a nice glossy shine. It’s a little sticky, which wasn’t a problem once it was on but made applying it with my fingers annoying. A brush or wand would be better than the pump top bottle.
Verdict
I generally liked two out of the three products in this kit and will definitely finish them. However, at €60 it’s pretty pricey for what it is. For that reason I don’t think I’d buy it again.
If you have a femme in your life who really likes pink things and bubblegum, though, it could be a cute and sensual Valentine’s Day gift.
Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me this product to review! All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.
I recently received Lovehoney’s Ultimate Sex Position Enhancer Set, a two-piece set comprising a sex position wedge and ramp. Instead of doing a straightforward review, I thought I’d do something a little different and tell you about a few different ways you can use items like this.
Sex furniture and sex position aids are having a moment in a big way, and I’ve been wanting to try some for ages. Turns out they are both enormous (Mr C&K when this thing arrived in a comically huge box: “Amy, where on EARTH are you going to keep it!?”) and surprisingly versatile.
Lovehoney Ultimate Sex Position Enhancer Set
This set consists of two pieces, a wedge and a ramp, that can be used together or separately. Both are 24″ wide, with the ramp measuring 34″ in length and 12″ in height and the wedge measuring 14″ in length and 7″ in height. Again: I did not fully grasp how huge these things are. Think very carefully before purchasing if you live in a tiny apartment or don’t have anywhere to store them!
The cushions are made of a firm and supportive foam, and covered with a micro-velvet cover that is fluid proof, removeable, and washable. So if you get sex fluids or lube all over it, just whip the cover off and wash it on a normal cycle in the washing machine. The exterior is also soft and non-slippery. I wish they came in a colour other than grey, but at least it’s fairly unobtrusive and will blend in with your decor.
5 Ways to Use a Sex Position Wedge or Other Sex Position Aid
There are so many creative ways to use a sex position wedge, position aid, or other types of sex furniture. Here are just a few of my faves.
Try Different Positions for Penetrative Sex
This is perhaps the most obvious use for a piece of sex furniture such as a sex position wedge. It is, presumably, what they were originally designed for. But whether you’re having penis-in-vagina, anal, or strap-on sex, a sex position wedge or ramp can make it easier and more comfortable to get into all kinds of positions.
I hear they can be particularly good for missionary position vaginal sex, raising the receiver’s hips to allow for deeper penetration and more precise G-spot stimulation. They’re also great for legs-up positions and for cushioning the knees during receiver-on-top positions.
Make Oral Sex Easier
Do you love going down on your partner for hours but find that neck strain is an issue for you? Yeah, me too (I often use the edge of the bed for this reason, which can work well.) But a positioning aid can be a game changer in this area.
A sex position wedge under the receiver’s hips can make their genitals more accessible and make it more comfortable for the giver. That way, you can lick or suck for as long as you like in absolute comfort.
Get Comfy During Masturbation
Do you ever find it difficult to get comfortable in one position while you’re masturbating, particularly during a long session or if it takes you a while to get off? If so, try using your sex position wedge or ramp to experiment with different positions.
Personally, I find reclining on the ramp while using the wedge to prop up my upper back and neck supremely comfy. Your mileage may vary, of course.
Have Sex on the Floor… In Style
Sometimes you just want to get all primal and fuck on the floor… but then find the idea is better in theory than in practice. Carpet burn or hard wooden floors against your knees? No thanks. But get the ramp and wedge out, and suddenly you’ve got a ready made sex couch wherever you want to put it!
Use It as a Toy Mount
If you enjoy grinding toys, a sex position wedge can make an ideal toy mount. I find the wedge works particularly well with my Godemiche Grind Pads and Vibe Pads. Just fasten them to the wedge with the straps provided, position it underneath you, and you’re good to go.
Of course, you can also get creative with all kinds of sex toys. If you can find a way to hold it in place (I recommend those same straps or a length of rope,) the wedge also works brilliantly as a wand mount.
Bonus: Use It For Totally Unsexy Things
Mine is currently propping up a wet mattress in my guest room while it dries out. It’s… a long story.
Thanks to Lovehoney for supplying me with the product featured in this post to share with you all. All views, as always, are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post. Product images: Lovehoney.
Cannabidiol, or CBD, is all the rage at the moment. This non-psychoactive and now legal (in many places, including the UK) compound found in the cannabis plant is touted as having all kinds of incredible benefits, from reducing anxiety to helping with chronic pain… and, yes, improving your sex life.
I am, it’s fair to say, rather cynical about such things. I don’t tend to believe amazing claims unless there’s amazing evidence to back them up. Maybe CBD really is a magical cure for all kinds of ills, and the science will prove it over the coming years. Or maybe it’s a very expensive and overhyped placebo. The reality, I imagine, in somewhere in the middle – it probably has some genuine benefits, and it’s probably been overhyped.
I wrote a little more here summarising very briefly what some of the available data says about CBD and sex so far. All this to say that I am approaching CBD-infused sex products, such as CBD lubes and oils, with a healthy amount of both curiosity and skepticism.
Bijoux Indiscrets recently offered me two new products to try: their Arousal Oil with CBD and their CBD Oral Sex Oil. But did they live up to their claims?
Bijoux Indiscrets Arousal Oil with CBD
Slow Sex Arousal Oil with CBD from Bijoux Indiscrets is made up of a range of natural oils and extracts including Coco-Caprylate/Caprate (an emollient derived from coconut oil), Olea Europaea Fruit Oil (AKA olive oil), shea butter, soybean oil, castor seed oil, and a number of others. Bijoux is an all-vegan company and uses only plant-derived ingredients.
The idea of the Arousal Oil is simple: apply it to your vulva and clitoris before sex or masturbation. The CBD, so it is claimed, may help to increase natural lubrication as well as stimulating blood flow to the area to increase sensitivity.
I did feel as though I experienced an increase in sensitivity when I applied a few drops of this arousal oil to my clitoris and labia and then waited a few minutes. When I touched myself, I was incredibly wet and sensitive and I reached orgasm very quickly. So from that perspective, yes, it worked!
Some sources I looked at claim that CBD is a vasodilator (something that opens the blood vessels, improving blood flow), which would go some way to explaining this effect. Others, however, claim that CBD without THC – that’s Tetrahydrocannabinol, or the high-inducing compound in cannabis – has few if any vasodilatory effects.
So what happened, then? Maybe the CBD had a direct causal effect on my arousal and sensitivity, and maybe it didn’t. Some of the other ingredients may have had an effect. The simple act of rubbing something on my genitals while in a sexual headspace might even have been the cause. Then, of course, there’s the potential for a placebo effect. At some point,I’d love to set up a blind experiment with this stuff and regular oil-based lube to see if there’s any difference when I don’t know which one I’m using.
Also worth noting that this product is only 1% CBD. That’s the equivalent of 0.3ml of CBD in a standard 30ml tube. That is, by anyone’s definition, a tinyCBD concentration and has left me a little doubtful that the CBD itself was the main cause of the effects I experienced.
The oil has a fairly strong and distinctive scent that I can best describe as “floral.” It’s fine, not really my sort of thing but not unpleasant either. Be careful when using the pump top bottle because it has a tendency to squirt out suddenly and go everywhere! I also found that my fingers felt quite sticky after applying this oil and I wanted to wash it off my hands as quickly as possible (neurodivergent sensory issues!? Me!?)
Bijoux Indiscrets Slow Sex Arousal Oil with CBD retails for £34/€38 for a 30ml bottle.
Bijoux Indiscrets CBD Oral Sex Oil
The Bijoux Indiscrets Oral Sex Oil contains far fewer ingredients than the Arousal Oil. It’s just sweet almond oil, coconut oil, cannabis sativa seed oil, CBD, peppermint oil, limonene and linalool. This product, too, is only 1% CBD.
The instructions say to apply a few drops to your lips and genitals, so that’s what I did. I was hoping I might feel some noticeable effect on my lips, such as tingling or an increase in sensitivity. Sadly, I didn’t feel much of anything even after several minutes and a reapplication.
It was the same when I tried it on my vulva and clit. The oil worked quite nicely as a simple lubricant, making everything pleasantly slippery. However, I did not notice any increase in sensitivity, sensation, or pleasure on any of the occasions that I tried it. This was a surprise, actually, since – whatever I do or don’t believe about CBD – peppermint-based products have worked well for me in the past.
The taste and smell of the Slow Sex Oral Sex Oil oil isn’t at all unpleasant. The overwhelming impression is of it being kind of minty. However, when I’m going down on a lover I want to be able to taste and smell them. (See also: why I don’t like flavoured lubes.)
Unlike the Arousal Oil, the Oral Sex Oil comes with a little eye dropper applicator. This makes it easier to apply to your lips and genitals with precision and without spilling it everywhere. It’s much less sticky than the Arousal Oil and didn’t give me the same sensory “ick.”
BIjoux Indiscrets Oral Sex Oil with CBD retails for £22/€25 for a 15ml bottle.
A Quick Word of Caution
Because they are oil-based, these products are not compatible with latex or polyisoprene. Don’t use them if you’re using safer sex barriers, such as condoms or dams, made from these materials. They’re okay to use with polyurethane, though.
Verdict
I remain intrigued but cynical about CBD in general, and for sex in particular. The available information is interesting, but far from conclusive. I’ve also now had a number of different experiences with different CBD products, and the wildly varying results tell me something in and of themselves.
If there was a simple causal relationship between CBD-containing products and increased arousal, boosted sensitivity, or faster and harder orgasms, surely I would experience that reliably every time in much the same way that I experience a reduction in pain every time I take a paracetamol?
The verdict, then? It’s complex and I wish there was more – and more reliable – data to draw on.
Ultimately though, if something works for you, I think that’s valuable in itself. I can’t explain why the CBD Arousal Oil worked for me (or why the Oral Sex Oil didn’t!) I suspect it has to do with a number of factors: the other ingredients, my headspace at the time, my level of cynicism, and possibly even the CBD itself.
All I can tell you about is my experience. Why not try it for yourself and see how you get on?
Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me these products to review. All views, as always, are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.
It’s the time of year where I bring you a day-by-day unboxing of one of Lovehoney’s adult advent calendars, and this year it’s the Lovehoney x Womanizer Couple’s Sex Toy Advent Calendar. If you’re just joining us now, check out the full series here and please consider using my affiliate links if you decide to make a purchase.
On with Day 4…
Sex Toy Advent Calendar 2022 Day 4: Mint Orgasm Balm
This product, very similar to Lovehoney’s Bliss Orgasm Balm (a surprising winner and a fave I return to again and again) is designed to be applied to external erogenous zones such as the clit and nipples. The menthol provides a cooling, tingling sensation that brings additional bloodflow to the area and increases sensitivity.
Product Info
Packaging: A small gold tin with black detailing
Body-safe? Yes, as long as you’re not allergic/sensitive to any of the ingredients
Vegan? Unfortunately not, as it contains beeswax
Safe for use in water: Yes
Clean-up: You’ll need to use plenty of soap and warm water as this is an oil-based product
Pros
Really does enhance pleasure – the extra sensitivity is glorious
Great for an all-day tease or kinky edging/orgasm control games.
A little goes a long way
Cons
Oily consistency makes clean-up a little annoying
Strong minty scent can linger even after washing
Verdict
Having tried variations on this product previously (including in last year’s calendar), I’m not at all surprised to say that today’s item is a hit. I really love this stuff.
Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the 2022 Couples’ Sex Toy Advent Calendar, which retails for £130 and contains £374.99 worth of products, to review. All views are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post and shopping through them helps to keep the site going! US readers can buy it here.
As a quick reminder, Slow Sex is a range of lubes, gels, and other “better sex” products by Bijoux Indiscrets. They are beautifully packaged in stylish boxes and include zero gendered terminology on either the packaging or the website. With the exception of the oral sex strips, they’re all scented with coconut.
If you missed part 1 of my review of several items from the Slow Sex range, check it out! Otherwise, I’m so glad you’re back for part 2! Let’s go.
Slow Sex Oral Sex Balm
I was highly sceptical about the Slow Sex Oral Sex Balm, as was Mr CK. But we kept an open mind and decided to give it a fair chance. It comes in a 10ml tube and I was expecting a liquid or thin gel, but it’s really more of a thick paste. I had to massage it between my fingers to get it to melt enough to use.
The packaging suggests applying Oral Sex Balm to your lips right before giving a blow job, or applying it directly to the penis. To get the full effect, we did both. I’m not sure most people would feel much if you only did the former.
First, the good: it definitely had an effect! My partner described it as a cooling sensation, which is likely caused by the menthol it contains. When you’re doing oral sex, the contrast between this cooling and the warmth of a mouth can be very interesting. He also reported that it did increase sensitivity slightly, and that it felt like sensation continued after the point of orgasm. So that was cool! It’s reasonably easy to wash off with warm water and soap.
Then the less-good: Since this is an oil-based product, it’s not suitable for use with any latex barriers. And given that I wouldn’t want several of the ingredients in my vagina, it also means it’s not really possible to go from oral to vaginal sex without cleaning up in between. I really dislike the sensation of anything oily or sticky on my hands, so I had to wipe this off with a tissue immediately after applying it.
Also worth noting: the coconutty/minty smell and taste is VERY potent. It’s certainly not unpleasant but if, like me, you like to experience the scent and taste of your partner’s body, this is definitely going to mask that.
Overall, a mixed experience but definitely more positive than we were expecting.
The Slow Sex Full Body Massage Gel comes in an attractive glass bottle. With 50ml in the bottle, it definitely feels like one of the more substantial Slow Sex products. This oil-based gel is designed for all-over massage.
The packaging says you can use it “anywhere and everywhere” and the website describes it as genital-compatible, so if your massage turns erotic you’re good to go. Again, I’d recommend that you keep it external only. This massage gel is also suitable for use in water and is compatible with silicone sex toys and latex barriers.
This is probably my favourite product in the entire Slow Sex range. It is slick without being sticky, and does not leave any nasty residue behind. As a bonus, it leaves my skin feeling lovely and moisturised (and coconut scented!) It also lasts ages, as a little bit goes a long way once it’s on the skin.
I also love that it comes in a pump bottle, which is much more user-friendly and less spillage-prone than the bottles massage oils usually come in.
If you’re asking “what on earth is an oral sex strip?”, well so was I! Turns out they’re little paper-thin minty strips that are designed to go on your tongue and then melt while you’re performing oral sex. Like the Oral Sex Balm, they have a strong minty flavour (spearmint oil is one of the main ingredients.) They taste like something you’d use to brush your teeth or freshen your breath.
The sensation is… interesting. Much like the Oral Sex Balm, the main appeal is that they provide a contrast between the cooling sensation and the warmth of a mouth. However, they melt very quickly so the intense effect only lasts for maybe a minute or so. You do get some of the effect for a while afterwards as the mint lingers on your body, but you only get maybe a maximum of 5 minutes out of each strip.
They were fine, but I wasn’t blown away. I did find that they heightened sensitivity somewhat, but not to such an extent that they can make or break the experience. And to be honest, I’m going to repeat something I said above – if I’m going down on a lover, I want to taste them, not a mouthful of mint.
“No fiction, no acting, no judgements, no comparisons, no fear, no guilt nor shame” – so begins the Bijoux Indiscrets “Slow Sex” manifesto, which adorns the packaging of each product in the Slow Sex range of better sex products. And it’s a message I can get behind.
Of course, sex is complicated. Fear, judgement and shame are very real for too many of us. I experience them all the time, even (especially?) as someone who makes a living talking openly about sex on the internet. And it’s going to take far more than a fun hashtag or a range of products to fully tackle the deep, systemic issues that allow sexual shame to run rampant.
Even so, in a world where so many companies (even purportedly sex-positive companies) profit from shame and stigma, I’m glad to see an adult retailer encouraging people to move away from these destructive ideas and towards more authentic pleasure.
I received a selection of items from the Slow Sex range to try out. So I can give each product the focus it deserves, I’m going to tackle these mini reviews in two posts.
Slow Sex Range: General Impressions
I received 5 full-size Slow Sex products, plus a couple of sample sizes. Each full-size item comes nicely presented in cardboard packaging (points for minimising single-use plastic!) The packaging is beautifully designed, featuring artistic close-ups of body parts (mouths, fingers, nipples) and sometimes floral motifs.
The Slow Sex range also doesn’t use any gendered marketing! Each product is described by referencing body parts and sex acts, without ascribing gender to them. It sounds like a small thing, but simply writing “the clitoris” instead of “her clitoris”, or “use it on your partner” rather than “use it on your man”, makes sexuality product marketing so much more inclusive. Other retailers, take note!
With the exception of the oral sex strips, all the Slow Sex products I tried have a strong and distinctive coconut aroma. I enjoy the smell and taste of coconut, so this was fine. But if you don’t, it’s something to be aware of as the scent is pretty noticeable and does tend to hang around after you’ve finished playing!
Slow Sex Clitoral Balm
The Slow Sex product I was most excited to try was the clitoral balm, so naturally that’s where I went first.
The Slow Sex Clitoral Balm comes in a little 10ml tube. Since you really only need a little bit to get the effect, a small tube will last you a while.
Slow Sex Clitoral Balm contains a pretty long list of ingredients, so check it carefully if you’re allergic or sensitive to anything. There’s nothing in the ingredients that immediately strikes me as problematic (e.g. parabens). I did some Googling of the ingredients I wasn’t familiar with, and found nothing concerning. It does contain glycerin, but for an external-only product that you use in tiny amounts, that won’t be a problem for most people.
Honestly, I was underwhelmed by the clitoral balm. I really wanted to love it, especially as I’ve tried and loved various similar products in the past, but it just didn’t do much for me. I got a slight warming sensation, which was pleasant enough, but it didn’t really enhance sensitivity or give me any noticeable increase in pleasure. If you enjoy warming lubes, this is a slight step up from that, and you might enjoy it.
I’ll probably finish this tube, but I’m unlikely to buy it again.
Slow Sex Clitoral Balm retails for €16.95. According to Bijoux, it’s compatible with all toy types and with latex barriers.
Slow Sex Finger Play Gel
The Slow Sex Finger Play Gel is basically a water-based lube designed for external use, particularly for fingering or hand-jobs. It contains just a few ingredients, of which the main ones are glycerin, water, and aloe vera leaf juice. Given the high glycerin concentration, don’t use this one inside your vagina, as this can cause yeast infections.
The Finger Play Gel is a lovely, thick lubricant. It lasts well, and a little goes a long way. Its thick texture and slipperiness make it perfect for hand sex. Due to the glycerin, it does feel a bit sticky after a while, but it’s easy to clean up with warm water and soap. After use, my skin felt soft and moisturised, probably thanks to the aloe. It has a pleasant, subtly sweet taste.
Slow Sex Finger Play Gel retails for €16.95. With just 30ml in a tube, it’s pretty pricey, but it should last you a while. Slow Sex Finger Play Gel is condom-compatible and suitable to use with all toy materials.
Slow Sex Nipple Play Gel
The Slow Sex Nipple Play Gel comes in a little 10ml glass tube with a roller ball applicator. Simply apply a little to your nipples, and then play as you normally would. The gel gives a subtle cooling, tingling sensation.
I found that the Nipple Play Gel slightly heightened sensitivity. When I applied it then went about my day, it made me more aware of my nipples – and particularly the feel of them against my clothing – than I’d normally be. Potentially fun if you want to heighten your arousal throughout the day. I found that one application lasted about an hour.
It also increases sensitivity if you’re doing nipple play with hands, toys, or clamps. But this stuff really comes into its own when combined with oral nipple stimulation. The cool gel combined with a warm mouth makes everything feel much more intense. And since the gel has a sweet taste, it’s not unpleasant for the giver, either! (Assuming they like coconut.)
The Slow Sex Nipple Play Gel is water-based and does not contain any ingredients that are toxic or problematic for topical use. It’s easy to wash off when you’re done and leaves a gentle coconutty smell on the skin.