[Masturbation Monday] Watching

He watches me. His glasses perch on the bridge of his nose and his mouth curls in a small smile at my embarrassment. I feel his eyes fixed upon me, even when I close my own. Watching, always watching.

I feel his gaze as surely as hands on my skin. He can carress me from across the room with a glance. An approving nod can make my whole day, a warning raise of an eyebrow bring me back into line. Under his control. Under his watchful gaze.

Some nights he doesn’t even touch me. He just sits in the armchair, sipping a glass of Merlot or a strong black coffee, and waits for me to put on a show for him.

I stretch out on the bed, running my hands over my own body. Slowly peel off my clothing, one piece at a time. I never stop being self-conscious. Every time, I feel the flush of humiliation creep warmly through my veins. He just watches.

I pinch my own nipples until they’re erect and smarting. Spread my legs, showing him the deep pink and brown folds of my vulva, running my fingers through my curly black pubic hair. He, watching, knows that I am drippng for him.

When I can’t stand the ache between my thighs any more, I dip my fingers into my cunt. Perhaps I pause to taste my own need, savoring the faint tang of my arousal on my tongue. Or perhaps I just fuck myself, head thrown back, arching my back and thrusting my hips, exaggerating my moans because I know that’s what he wants to see.

The show ends when he’s had enough. If I haven’t had time to reach satisfaction when he says it’s time to stop, I go to sleep aching and wanting. If he wants more, I’d better keep performing for him, forcing climax after climax out of my overstimulated cunt until he’s satisfied. It is for his pleasure. My own is incidental.

Sometimes I wish he’d just fuck me, but that’s not what we do. Knowing I’m gagging for it is part of what gets him off. Knowing that he won’t fuck me. Probably he won’t even touch me. He’ll just sit there, while I make a spectacle of myself for his entertainment.

Watching.

The Masturbation Monday meme is run by Kayla Lords. This week’s prompt image, shown at the top of this post, is by the absolutely gorgeous and extremely talented Cara Thereon. Click the logo to see what everyone else is getting off to this week, and please buy me a coffee if you enjoyed this little sexy story! Plus don’t forget it’s #MasturbationMonth and I’m working with Lovehoney to bring you sexy content all month long.

#SoSS 24 March 2018: Eroticon Edition

#SoSS or #ShareOurShitSaturday comes from a call to action by the fabulous Girl on the Net, calling on all those who love the work of sex-positive creators (writers, bloggers, photographers, artists, educators) to share our work (“share our shit”) far and wide. This is particularly important in the wake of Facebook deleting accounts, Twitter shadow-banning, and Instagram shutting down anything with “BDSM” or “sex” in the name.

For a lot of us, this work is both our passion and the way we make our living. We show up day in, day out, often for peanuts in terms of financial reward, because we believe in the content we make and we know the content we put out into the world has a positive impact on our readers.

Of course, supporting us with your £££ is amazing if you can, but sharing our shit is a way that you can support us without it costing you a penny. So, in the spirit of #SoSS, here’s an Eroticon-themed roundup of some of my favourite content from across the blogosphere this week…

1. A Pub Gang -Bang by Tits & Test Tubes

This post-Eroticon fantasy scene has got it all – group sex, humiliation, spanking and more. It’s so, so good… and makes me even happier because I’m kinda in it. (No, I’m not telling you which character I am, you can use your imagination). Jadis is a serious up-and-coming talent in the sex blog-o-sphere.

2. I Lost My Sexuality for a Year by Miss Eve E

This is a stunning, personal and powerful account of Eve’s last year of pain and illness, and how that affected her sexual desire. Her experience really shows how so much of the medical world doesn’t take sexuality – or sexual side-effects of pain and medication – seriously. But it’s untimately a story of hope, as she talks about how Eroticon helped her to reclaim her sexuality and she will continue to do so in 2018. Really important.

3. What I Took Home from Eroticon by John Brownstone

A lovely piece on the nature and importance of community. I loved meeting JB, who together with his wife Kayla makes up the powerhouse duo behind Loving BDSM. He’s just as warm, friendly and fun in person as he is on the podcast, and this piece really speaks to me as someone who felt very alone until I finally found my community and my people.

4. Eroticon 2018: Ten Things… by The Other Livvy

A great piece from Livvy about the things she took away from Eroticon this year. Features a Star Wars joke, a lovely comment on my ridiculous Saturday night outfit, a hot-as-fuck vac bed picture, some lovely quotes, and a #SinfulSunday picture that I took.

5. Learning Post #Eroticon by Cara Thereon

Some beautiful words from Cara about the things she learned and took away from Eroticon. I loved meeting Cara – she’s lovely, smart and insightful and the piece she read out on Sunday was hot as fuck. She talks about learning about herself, facing her fears, and becoming more enmeshed in the community. I look forward to whatever she does next!

And that’s it for this week, folks. There were so many brilliant post-‘Con pieces that really spoke to me and you can read them all here. This is just a small selection of my personal favourites.

Have a great week, and don’t forget: if you like our work, SHARE IT!