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Kink Party Outfit Ideas: What to Wear to a Play Party

Published on by Amy

When people are getting ready to attend their first kink party, one of the most frequency asked questions is “what the hell do I wear!?” What to wear to a kink play party can feel like a minefield, but it’s not as complicated as it seems. In this post I’ll dispel some common myths as well as share some kink party outfit ideas to get you inspired. I’ve also included some links to some of my favourite pieces and stores.

Check the Dress Code

Some parties and events have their own dresscode. These can be anything from very broad and general to highly specific. Events with very specific dress codes are generally those geared around a particular kink which relates in some way to the dress code – for example, clothed Dom/naked sub events or those for latex fetishists. Some may even have fun fancy dress themes.

Many events will simply state “fetishwear”, “make an effort”, “smart black minimum”, or “no jeans or trainers.” Within the dress code or general guidelines, you’re free to be as creative as you like.

Check out the Fetlife page for your chosen event, if they have one. You may see pictures that past attendees have shared of their outfits, which can provide some inspiration, or example pictures for what constitutes suitable attire.

What is “Fetishwear?”

Fetishwear is a pretty broad term. In short, though, it refers to anything out-of-the-box, provocative, sexualised, or in some way over-the-top or extreme. Certain fabrics, such as leather, latex, rubber, PVC, and wet-look styles are commonly seen in fetishwear.

Highly structured items such as corsets as well as revealing clothing such as lingerie may also be considered fetishwear. Certain types of detailing, such as straps, studs, or spikes, can add a fetishy vibe to your kink party outfit.

Kinky or sexualised accessories and BDSM wear such as collars and cuffs, body harnesses, stockings, and extreme footwear can fall into this category, too.

Do I Have to Spend a Lot of Money?

Nope!

There are some kink events that have a reputation for being picky to the point of snobbish about the dress code, putting expectations on attendees that are financially prohibitive to many. I recommend avoiding those events unless spending hundreds of £/$ on an outfit is part of the fun for you.

For most kink events, there is no expectation that you spend a lot of money. In fact, you can likely get something suitable on sale or even put together an outfit from pieces you already own if money is a concern for you.

Do I Have to Show a Lot of Skin?

No!

Well, not usually. Again, there are a small number of events where this is expected as part of the event theme (such as clothed Dom/naked sub events.) As a general rule, though, there is no expectation to get naked or to show off any more of your body than you feel comfortable with.

You probably will see people naked or wearing very skimpy outfits at kink parties. But you’ll also see people in full length dresses or skirts, trousers or suits, or outfits that are sexy but not revealing (e.g. catsuits.)

In short, at the vast majority of kink events you can show as much or as little skin as you like. Some events do have restrictions on genital nudity due to venue licensing, so always check if you are planning a very skimpy outfit.

The Classic Kink Party Outfits: Lingerie, Corsetry, Kilts, LBDs and More

There are some types of outfit you’ll see again and again at kink events and play parties, and which are almost always appropriate. Lingerie (such as bra-and-panties sets, bodysuits, and chemises), corsets, kilts, suits, and little black dresses will usually be absolutely fine.

In some spaces, black jeans and a button-down shirt or the kind of dress you’d wear to go clubbing will also be acceptable.

Latex, Leather and Rubber, Oh My!

Certain fabrics have specifically kinky connotations: latex, leather, rubber, PVC, and so on. If any of these fabrics appeal to you, they can be a great starting point for an outfit.

You don’t need to shell out a lot of money unless you want to. A PVC/leather-look piece of the kind available at many sex shops is a great alternative to more expensive real leather. Lovehoney’s Easy-On Latex items are an affordable alternative to the price-tag of custom latex that I wear regularly. They’re also a great choice for those of us who are too clumsy to want to risk traditional latex (hi!)

You can also invest in a single piece, such as a leather corset or pair of trousers or a latex top, and then build your outfit around that from cheaper items or things you already own. Even an accessory made of one of these fabrics, such as latex suspenders, gauntlets or a pair of gloves, can give a nod to these fetishes without the cost of a full outfit.

Accessorise Your Kink Party Outfit to Impress

I wear a lot of the same outfits again and again to different kink parties. What I like to do, though, is accessorise them differently. A few appropriate accessories can really elevate your outfit and allow you ro express your kinky self.

Think about:

My current kinky accessory obsession? These amazing hand harnesses. I’ve worn them with everything from dungarees to a corset, and I love them. I also like to finish off my party outfit with a perfume that matches my vibe for the night, whether it’s something sweet and flirty or sultry and sensual.

Let’s Talk Shoes

One common misconception is that women or femme-presenting people have to wear heels in kink spaces. This isn’t the case at all. I very rarely incorporate heels into my kink party outfits because, well, they fucking hurt and I have chronic pain in my feet anyway without making it worse.

Of course, you can wear those sky-high heels if you like. But if you’d rather not, you can also opt for low heels or for flat shoes/boots. Just make sure they’re clean, polished, and go with your outfit. If in doubt, you’ll rarely go wrong with a nice pair of plain black shoes or boots in your preferred style.

Statement shoes can also be fun, if that’s your thing. My turquoise glitter flats get a lot of outings with various outfits! You’ll also likely see footwear brands such as New Rocks, Doc Martens, Koi, and their various equivalents in kink spaces.

Hair & Makeup

If you’re the kind of person who likes enhancing your outfits by doing fun things with your hair and/or makeup, a kink party is a great chance to go wild. Why not experiment with a new temporary hair colour (or a wig), a fabulous eye makeup look, a bold lipstick, or even something more outlandish such as glitter or body-paint?

Nails can be a fun place to express your style, too. I often get my nails done before a big event and I usually opt for something ostentatious and over the top (typically with sparkles and lots of colour.) Of course, a striking black or classic red polish are also great options.

If makeup, nail polish and fancy hairstyles aren’t your thing, that’s cool too! Just make sure your hair is washed and your nails are clean, and you’ll be fine.

Wear Your Kink as Part of Your Party Outfit

Collars are perhaps the most common accessory you’ll see people wearing at kink parties. If you have a collar you love (whether it’s associated with a specific relationship or not) then wearing it can help you to get into a kinky headspace. You can add a leash, too, if you like.

You can also do amazing things with rope. If you know how to tie a basic arms-out rope harness, it can be a beautiful addition to give an outfit a kinky twist. Rope gauntlets, rope corsets, and rope dresses are also popular. The possibilities are endless, especially if you invest in some beautiful colourful rope.

Other good options include chastity devices, pet play gear (such as ears, masks or tails), strap-on harnesses, decorative cuffs, nipple clamps, and gags.

Consider Practicality

That latex outfit might look amazing, but if it takes 30 minutes to get in and out of it, is it the best choice for an event where you’re going to want to get naked to play or get in the hot tub? You might love your favourite corset, but is it practical for moving around in as you flog or tie up your partner?

Don’t forget to think about what you might want to do at the party and factor these practicalities into your kink party outfit choice.

Consider the weather, too. If it’s 35°C out, you probably don’t want to wear a full latex catsuit. (Ask me how I know.)

Don’t Overthink Your Kink Party Outfits

This is a lot of information and a lot of things to think about as you plan your kink party outfit. A play party can be a great place to experiment with different modes of presentation and tap into your most authentic self.

The most important thing in deciding what to wear to a play party is that it makes you feel good. You won’t have a good time if you feel like you’re pretending to be someone you’re not.

Here are my five golden rules for putting together an amazing kink party outfit:

  • Check the dress code, follow it, and ask the organisers if in doubt
  • Make an effort and get creative
  • Wear something that makes YOU feel amazing, focusing on being authentic and true to yourself
  • Don’t forget the details, from accessories and shoes to hair and makeup – they can lift your entire look!
  • Think about the practicalities.

This is supposed to be fun, so enjoy yourself no matter what you decide to wear.

This post contains affiliate links. All views, as always, are mine.

Close up of green dress with a "100% recycled fabric" label, for a post on sustainable style as a femme

Five Ways I’m Trying to Increase Sustainability in My Femme Style

Published on by Amy1 Comment

My identity and presentation as a femme is tremendously important to me. Femme is not just a way of dressing, but a way of sharing who I am with the world. It’s an inherently queer identity and my femme style is a way of living in and embodying my queerness every day. However, like many of us in recent years, I’ve also been thinking more about my impact on the planet and how to express my style in a more sustainable way. So, in collaboration with slow fashion brand IDENTITY LINGERIE, I wanted to talk about some of the changes I’ve made.

Acknowledgement and disclaimer: Before I dive in, I want to acknowledge that to a certain extent many sustainability practices (including those I have listed here) require privileges that many people do not have access to, including money and time. It is also not ultimately possible for individuals to save the planet. The biggest changes must come from corporations and governments. This list is not a prescription or a set of instructions, and you know best what is possible for your life. This is simply what works for me. I’m also far from perfect and frequently fail to live up to the high standards I set for myself. No ethical consumption under capitalism, etc.

Breaking Up with Fast Fashion

Fast fashion—brands that churn out massive quantities of ultra-cheap, throwaway clothing—is one of the world’s most polluting industries. It also exploits workers and harms animals. For all these reasons, I no longer buy new fast fashion items. Sustainable alternatives to new fast fashion if you like a particular style include thrifting pieces, finding alternatives from sustainable brands, or getting creative with items you already own.

Fast fashion brands encourage damaging practices like unnecessary impulse buys, large “hauls” of things that will be worn once or twice (or never worn), and fashions that change overnight.

Buying (and Selling/Donating) Second Hand

I love getting new clothes and shoes, but I actually very rarely buy anything apart from underwear brand new any more. My town has a large number of charity and second-hand shops, and I often find nice pieces at bargain prices there. I also spend far too much time browsing apps like Vinted and Depop and watch-listing things, a small fraction of which I’ll eventually buy. My favourite recent finds include a fabulous leather jacket and some Lucy & Yak rainbow dungarees.

I just had a major clear-out of clothes I no longer wear. I’m going to sell on a few bits, and the rest I’ll either pass on to friends, take to clothing swaps, or donate to charity. That way, they’re not either languishing in the back of my wardrobe or creating more waste, and can instead be worn and enjoyed by someone else.

Of course, second-hand clothing isn’t totally without its issues (delivery emissions when you buy or sell online being the obvious one, and it’s still possible to over-consume thrifted items), but it’s one way to reduce clothing waste and reduce purchases of new items while enjoying style in a more sustainable way.

Buying More Versatile Styles for Sustainable Rewearing

I enjoy getting creative with my presentation. For this reason, I love clothes, shoes, and accessories I can wear multiple ways. One of my favourite dresses at the moment is a simple one that I can dress down with leggings and a cardigan, make playful with fun tights and stompy boots, or dress way up with a petticoat, a waist belt and heels for a wedding or date.

For me, part of the fun of sustainable femme style is creating different looks by mixing and matching the same items in different ways.

I recently got this gorgeous green multiway dress from IDENTITY LINGERIE. IDENTITY is a slow fashion brand that makes lingerie, nightwear, dresses, and more, all while following zero-waste practices. This dress is wearable in so many different ways that it feels a bit like a new dress every time I put it on. The multiway bridesmaid dress trend has been popular for bridal parties for some time, but I think they’re a great choice for anyone looking to get more mileage out of one garment.

Buying Recycled and Upcycled Materials

Materials is a really complicated one when it comes to clothing, and there are no easy answers here. It’s also very, very hard to totally avoid unsustainable synthetic fibres such as polyester, nylon, and viscose. Some natural materials, such as cotton and bamboo, also present issues. The more sustainable alternatives can be expensive and hard to find, not to mention the confusion of wading through the muddy and often conflicting information out there.

One thing I’ve started trying to do, though, is look for more recycled and upcycled materials. This is a great way to support the “rescue” of materials that would otherwise end up in landfill.

For example, I recently reviewed a range of polyurethane (PU) leather accessories. PU is, in itself, pretty terrible environmentally. However, that particular brand manufactures its styles entirely from recycled materials, creating a sustainable alternative use for waste. I’ve also tried some gorgeous eco-friendly lingerie pieces over the years, many of which I still love.

Switching to Eco-Friendly Bathing & Beauty Products

Glitter is, of course, a staple of my personal femme style. But the wrong glitter products can also be hugely harmful to the environment. For that reason, you will only ever find eco-friendly, biodegradable glitter in my makeup bag.

I’ve tried to switch to more eco-friendly bathing and beauty products recently, too, including shampoo bars, mineral sunscreen, and products made without palm oil. This is in addition to my policy of not buying anything that was tested on animals.

Sustainable Style as an Ongoing Project

I’m sure I will keep learning more about sustainable style and eco-friendly practices, adjusting my habits as I go. None of us are (or can be) perfect. What matters is that we learn, grow, and try to do better every day.

IDENTITY LINGERIE gifted me the piece featured in this post. All views and writing, as always, are mine.

A woman wearing a black half-face mask, black bra, and black leather body harness. Text reads: Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE review

[Accessories Review] Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Faux Leather BDSM-Inspired Accessories Review

Published on by Amy

Whether you’re looking to take your kink party look to the next level or just add a little fetish-inspired glamour to your wardrobe, accessories can make your outfit. MAZE is a line of BDSM-themed vegan leather accessories from Bijoux Indiscrets including harnesses, headpieces, cuffs, and more. They sent me a selection of pieces to test and review.

Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE box and interior packaging

MAZE: Ethical Glamour?

Every Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE product is made of PETA-certified vegan polyurethane (PU) faux leather. PU leather is controversial because, though it is not made from animals, it is a type of plastic made from petrochemicals which have a terrible impact on the environment.

However, Bijoux Indiscrets’ MAZE range is made from recycled materials that would otherwise have ended up in landfill. For ethical and environmental reasons, I don’t usually buy new plastic-based faux leather items. But, since this material was already out there in the world and would otherwise have gone to waste, I feel comfortable wearing and recommending the MAZE range.

Ultimately, like real leather, you’ll have to consider your personal values and make your own decisions when it comes to PU leather.

The Look and Feel of Bijoux Faux Leather

Bijoux’s faux leather is soft and supple, looking and feeling remarkably like the real thing. The only thing missing is that unmistakeable leather smell.

Based on my experience with the various MAZE pieces I’ve tried it wears well——softening up just a little over time—and requires minimal maintenance to stay looking good as new. If you need to clean your MAZE accessories, a damp cloth and a little gentle soap is all you need.

Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE O-Ring Collar

The black faux leather Maze collar on my desk.

There are all kinds of elaborate, ornate and fancy BDSM collars available. However, sometimes elegant simplicity is what’s called for. The MAZE O-ring collar is a slender black band with a simple ring at the front, which is both decorative and functional (ideal for attaching a leash, for example!)

The MAZE collar is comfortable and easy to wear. On its first outing, I wore it all evening at a party, and it was so comfy that we were half way through our two hour drive home before I remembered I was still wearing it.

I like the simple fastening mechanism on this collar. Instead of a buckle, you close it by poking a small peg through one of the holes. The Bijoux Indiscrets O-ring collar is adjustable from a minimum circumference of 12.2″ up to a maximum of 16.14″, to fit the vast majority of wearers.

Pair your MAZE collar with a leash and cuffs for kinky play, with a harness for bondage-inspired glamour, or with some nipple pasties for burlesque-style sex appeal.

The MAZE collar retails for $30/£23.

Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Hand Harnesses

Woman's hand wearing Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE hand harness

The Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Hand Harness is a bracelet that’s worn around the wrist with an additional strap extending to a finger loop. They come in a set of two.

I really love these hand harnesses. They’re incredibly sexy in an unexpected way, just vanilla enough to wear in public but just kinky enough to draw a second glance. I like them as an easy way to enhance a simple all-black outfit with a little bondage-inspired twist. As someone who uses my hands a lot in an expressive way when I talk, I love having them accessorised like this. They’re comfy to wear, too, and do not impede my ability to use my hands normally.

If you like, you can also use the Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Hand Harness as a kink tool. Why not clip them together to hold your partner’s hands behind their back, or attach a leash to one of them through the centre ring?

Unfortunately, the MAZE Hand Harness is not particularly size-inclusive. Although the wristband is adjustable from 6.3″ up to 7.87″, the finger loop is not adjustable and is pretty small. I have fairly small hands even for a cis woman, and the finger loop was slightly too snug to be truly comfortable. It did loosen a bit with wear, but it is right on the limit of what I could wear comfortably. Anyone with hands larger than mine—which includes a lot of AFAB people and the vast majority of AMAB people—would not be able to wear it comfortably.

A set of two hand harnesses retails for £31/€35.

Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Leg Garters

Woman's leg in Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Leg Garter

The Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Leg Garters consist of two bands that sit just below the knee and around the ankle. A central strap runs up the back of the calf and connects them. They come in sets of two.

Like the MAZE hand harnesses, I find these sexy in a unique way. The calves and lower legs are not areas we often think to accessorise, which I think is a shame. An accessory that draws the eye to that part of the body adds an unexpected focal point to a look.

The MAZE Leg Garters are versatile, too. They look great with stompy boots and fishnet tights, but equally good with a short skirt and killer heels or even over a pair of skinny jeans. In fact, they’ll draw attention to your legs in just about any outfit and you can style them in tonnes of different and fun ways.

Again, though, size inclusion is a major problem. The band that goes around the knee is adjustable from 11.42″ to 13.78″. The ankle band is adjustable from 6.69″ to 9.84″. I can wear the leg garters on the loosest setting at the top and second loosest at the bottom. But again, a large majority of people with bigger bodies will simply not be able to wear them. Some MAZE products come with extenders, but these do not.

A set of two leg garters retails for £40/€45.

MAZE Cross Cleavage Faux Leather Harness

Bijoux Indiscrets Faux Leather Chest Harness in black

The Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Cross Cleavage Harness sits around the waist with straps over the shoulders and a criss-cross design across the chest. Though it’s described as a “cleavage harness”, it’s totally wearable by people both with and without breasts. This piece is available in black or light brown.

The MAZE Cross Cleavage Harness is adjustable around the waist as well as over the shoulders, so you can get a comfortable fit for your body. The criss-cross section sits close enough to the centre of the chest that it should be comfortable even for people with larger breasts to wear.

Bijoux Indiscrets Faux Leather Chest Harness official product picture featuring a model wearing the harness under a blazer

In terms of sizing, I’m coming back to my consistent complaint about size inclusiveness again. The MAZE Cross Cleavage Harness fits waist sizes from 60cm (23.62″) up to 94cm (37″.) With the black harness only, you’ll get an extra extender that can add up to 25cm (9.84″) extra. I’d love to see these pieces made available in a wider range of sizes. I’d also love to see the brown version come with extenders, too.

The Cross Cleavage Faux Leather Harness is pretty androgynous in its style. This means you can pair it with an array of outfits to create the aesthetic you want—femme, masc, or anywhere in between. It works well with other fetishwear items such as latex, lingerie or corsetry (I think it would look spectacular over an underbust corset) or as a standout piece on its own. Thanks to the detailed design, it also pairs well with simple garments such as a plain t-shirt, dress, or blazer. It’s a real statement accessory that can elevate a basic outfit to a bold and memorable look.

The MAZE Cross Cleavage Harness retails for €60/£54.

MAZE Multiway Faux Leather Body Harness

Bijoux Indiscrets Maze Multiway Faux Leather Body Harness in black

The Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE Multiway Harness is a body harness that can be worn in multiple different ways. It has four straps that connect to an O-ring in the centre. Bijoux shows a couple of variations for ways to wear the harness on the product page, but honestly there aren’t really any wrong ways! Wear it however feels good to you. This piece is also available in both black and light brown.

The MAZE Multiway Harness is adjustable and, depending on your body shape and how you wear it, can either hug the contours of your body or hang more loosely.

The neck straps are adjustable from 23cm (9.05″) up to 44cm (17.32″), and the waist is adjustable from 130cm (51″) up to 151cm (59.44″). Considering it wraps around twice, the standard harness will work for anyone with up to around a 30″ waist. If you order the black, you’ll also get two 20cm (7.87″) extenders.

Though I like the inclusion of the extenders, I would really like to see this harness made available in a wider range of sizes. I’d also like to see Bijoux using models with more diverse body sizes. That’s why I’ve included the pictures of me wearing the harness above, so you can see how it looks on a different body type.

Model wearing the Bijoux Indiscrets Multiway Harness
Image: Bijoux Indiscrets
Woman wearing the Bijoux Indiscrets Maze Multiway Faux Leather Body Harness over a grey top

As with the other Bijoux Indiscrets MAZE harness, this is a versatile and fundamentally fairly androgynous piece you can style in many different ways. I’m currently planning an outfit involving this harness over a corset, paired with leather trousers and my Doc Martens.

I love this piece and its versatility. I think I’ll be getting a lot of wear out of it!

The MAZE Multiway Harness retails for €60/£54.

Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me these pieces from the MAZE accessories range to try. All views are, as always, mine. This post contains affiliate links.

Header image for Aphrodisia Body Mist review from Bijoux Indiscrets showing a woman spraying perfume onto her wrist

[Cosmetics Review] Bijoux Indiscrets Aphrodisia Body Mist

Published on by Amy

I recently reviewed the Bijoux Indiscrets Aphrodisia Orgasm Enhancer and loved it. So today I’m looking at the perfume from this range: the Aphrodisia Body Mist.

Aphrodisia Body Mist

Aphrodisia is Bijoux Indiscrets’ new range of scented products which includes the orgasm enhancer and this body mist as well as a 2-in-1 massage and intimate gel and a massage candle. There’s also a combo kit.

My Body Mist arrived beautifully presented in black and gold packaging decorated with flower motifs, matching the floral notes in the fragrange. The Body Mist comes in a gorgeous black spherical glass bottle with an old-fashioned fabric bulb to spray it on. The presentation is top-notch and luxurious, especially considering the very reasonable price-point.

Bijoux Indiscrets Aphrodisia Body Mist - black spherical perfume bottle with old fashioned bulb squeezer

Like all Bijoux Indiscrets products, Aphrodisia Body Mist is vegan and cruelty-free. The formula is also alcohol-free.

Bijoux Indiscrets Aphrodisia Perfume: Scent & Mood

Aphrodisia is a floral scent consisting of rose, ylang ylang, and jasmine as the primary notes. It’s very floral and feminine, elegant yet still light and wearable.

The thing I like the most about fragrances is the stories, moods, and images they can invoke. When I spritz on a new scent, I like to close my eyes for a second and ask myself, who am I when I’m wearing this perfume? Where does it transport me to in my mind?

The story that the Aphrodisia scent tells me is one of fanciness imbued with sensuality. It makes me think of attending a black tie event wearing a ballgown, but with a little something extra… perhaps I’m wearing the tiniest, laciest underwear imaginable. Perhaps I’ve snuck on a body harness under my dress. Or perhaps I’m simply subtly making eyes at my lover across the room to let her know I’m already thinking about her ripping the dress off me when we get home.

The scent of the Bijoux Indiscrets Aphrodisia Body Mist is strong and distinctive when you first apply it – you really only need a spray or two. It mellows out over the hours as you wear it, but I’ve never found that I needed to reapply it. This means the 100ml bottle will last you ages.

Verdict

Aphrodisia Body Mist retails for €35 ($40 or £32.) I love this perfume, and I can’t believe how well-priced it is! No matter what I’m doing or where I’m going (or not going), it’s a lovely scent I can spray on when I want just a little extra fanciness in my day.

Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me the Aphrodisia Body Mist to try. All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume review featuring a woman spraying perfume on herself from a bottle

[Cosmetics Review] Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume

Published on by Amy

Scent is powerful. It can evoke feelings, stir memories, and play a major role in the sensory experience of arousal and sex. That’s probably why pheromone perfume is having a big moment right now. There are 33.5k posts carrying the #pheromoneperfume tag on TikTok and 57.5k posts on Instagram at the time of writing. But do pheromone perfumes actually work? I was keen to find out. So when I got offered some Eye of Love pheromone perfume products to try out and review, I couldn’t wait to delve into what this viral craze is all about.

What Are Eye of Love Pheromone Perfumes?

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume in Black Diamond (left) and Red Diamond

To understand what pheromone perfumes are and whether they actually work, we first have to understand what pheromones are.

In short:

Officially named in 1959, pheromones are chemical substances that are secreted outside of the body in fluids like urine and sweat. Essentially, pheromones are a hidden form of communication. They send signals from one individual to another of the same species. This triggers a response in the individual receiving those signals, such as a hormonal change or specific behavior.

– Healthline

Interestingly, there is still a gap in scientific understanding when it comes to exactly how, or even if, pheromones work in humans. According to one paper from 2013 published in Facts, Views and Vision in ObGyn, “Many examples exist in animals but their role in humans remains uncertain since adults have no functioning vomeronasal organ, which processes pheromone signals in animals.” Deb Levine, MA and Stephanie Watson, writing for WebMD, say, “It’s not clear how the [pheromone] process works in humans. We do have VNO organs, but they’re small and may be too poorly developed to process pheromones like the VNO organs in animals can. More likely, we process these signals through our olfactory system.”

Pheromone perfumes, then, operate on the assumption that—like animals—humans use pheromones to increase their sexual attractiveness to potential mates. These fragrances contain synthetic versions of the substances that are commonly called human pheromones. The idea, then, is simple: wear them and people will be more attracted to you.

Eye of Love’s pheromone perfumes utilise two key compounds that have been deemed to be human pheromones or to have a pheromone-like effect in humans: estratetraenol and androstenol.

All Eye of Love perfumes are vegan and cruelty-free. They smell yummy, as we’ll discuss more a bit later. But do pheromone perfumes actually work?

Do Pheromone Perfumes Actually Work? What the Science Says

Eye of Love’s pheromone perfume, which I’m testing and reviewing today, can supposedly help you “be more attractive. Be more social. Be more successful.” All that from a perfume? It’s a lofty claim.

There’s a lot we don’t understand about how human attraction works. And, as we established in the section above, there’s also a lot we also don’t understand about how (or if) pheromones work in humans. So whether or not these pheromone perfumes actually “work” in any scientific sense isn’t really provable right now.

And look, I’m inherently somewhat cynical. As a general rule, I don’t believe in things for which I cannot see meaningful evidence.

Anecdotally, pheromone perfumes do seem to have a positive impact for many people. You’ll hear stories about service staff doubling their tips when they wear pheromone perfume, people getting asked out at the shops, and people suddenly having way more sex with their long term partners when they start using these products.

Is that down to the perfume, though? Honestly, until there’s more robust scientific backing behind the pheromone phenomenon, I’m going to assume it’s a placebo affect. If you believe something is going to make you more attractive, you’ll act like a person who believes themselves to be attractive. This, in itself, can be highly desirable. If you believe in the effects of the perfume, you might carry yourself with more confidence. This means you’ll project the open, flirtatious vibe of a person who knows they’re desirable and wants to be approached. In other words, it’s a simple placebo effect in action. Confidence can draw people to you in a way that might make you think “wow, it’s the pheromones!” when, spoiler alert, it’s actually all you.

Let’s not forget the fact that simply smelling nice can be a turn-on to many people. Scent can be incredibly erotic, so wearing a nice perfume can itself increase people’s attraction to you. When I see a woman I find attractive, smelling a nice perfume on her as she walks by can make her even sexier.

Shawn Talbott, PhD, quoted in a piece by Charlotte Hilton Anderson, MS, for The Healthy, also points out that “We know that plant compounds, like lavender and chamomile, can be used to reduce stress and enhance relaxation. So if stress is interfering with mood and suppressing libido, then we can use ‘plant pheromones’ to reduce stress. And if you’re less stressed then maybe your sex drive increases a bit.” In other words, the perfume might be having an impact but possibly not in the way you think.

The many positive pheromone perfume reviews could also be attributed, in part, to confirmation bias. In other words, if you expect to be more attractive wearing the perfume, you might notice attention from others more than you normally would (even if the actual type or amount of attention you’re receiving hasn’t changed.)

What I’m really saying is, if you’re going to try pheromone perfumes, go in with realistic expectations. You’re not going to just spritz this stuff on and instantly become irresistible to everyone of your preferred gender(s) who lays eyes on you. (That’s fairytale love potion silliness and even if it was real, it would be highly ethically questionable!)

What you might find, though, is that you find a little more confidence. A little more of your own, internal and unique brand of sexiness. And that can be just as magical, if not more so.

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume: Matchmaker Collection Review

The Eye of Love pheromone perfume Matchmaker Collection consists of two scents: Black Diamond and Red Diamond. Red Diamond is marketed more towards straight women and other people looking to attract men, while Black Diamond is marketed towards straight men and other people looking to attract women. (There are LGBTQ+ versions of each also available—mine both say “Attract Her”—though I’m unclear on whether there’s any actual difference in the product! I assume they contain different pheromones according to the genders of the people you’re trying to attract.)

Ultimately, though, both scents (like all scents!) are gender-neutral and for whoever feels good wearing them.

Eye of Love “Black Diamond” Review

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume in Black Diamond

Eye of Love describes Black Diamond as “a bold blend of cedar, blackcurrant, and lemon. Undertones of oak, white amber, and musk.” I’m kinda wary of describing scents using gendered language, but this one feels decidedly masculine to me.

When I first put it on, the cedar is the main thing I can smell. I actually like this one more when I’ve been wearing it for a couple of hours and it’s had time to mellow out on my skin. At that point, the fruity scents start to come out a little more.

Black Diamond is definitely sexy. This one calls to mind dark corners in atmospheric cocktail bars, leaning over to kiss a soft butch girl whose lips taste of whiskey. It calls to mind the black leather and dark wood of the swankiest BDSM dungeons I’ve been to, of the tug of restraints around my wrists and the slap-slap-slap of a flogger across my back.

Ultimately, I think I enjoy this perfume best on someone else rather than on myself. Black Diamond is a lovely scent, I just don’t think it’s my scent.

Eye of Love “Red Diamond” Review

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume in Red Diamond

Eye of Love describes Red Diamond as “a sensual blend of jasmine, grapefruit, and amber with a touch of citrus.” There are also middle notes of lily and blackcurrent and base notes of musk and vanilla. It feels femme and flirty, and calls to mind the way that summer sunshine always makes me feel sensual and sexy.

This one feels far more at home on my skin. I like the way it softens over the hours I’m wearing it, leaving me feeling like I’m wearing a bouquet of fruit and flowers.

Red Diamond is sexy, too, but in a very different way to its counterpart. If Black Diamond is kissing in a dark corner of a cocktail bar, then Red Diamond is flirting at a wholesome coffee shop while thinking about all the terribly non-wholesome things I would like to consensually do to the pretty femme across the table.

This one smells good enough that I’ll seriously consider buying more when my sample bottle runs out.

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume: Day to Night Bloom Set Review

I also received the Eye of Love Day to Night Bloom Set to review, which consists of two new fragrances from the Love in Bloom range: Sunny Daze and Lilac Dream. These fragrances draw inspiration from two strains of the cannabis plant: Sativa and Indica respectively. However, they do not actually contain any of those components.

These fragrances were, apparently, “specifically made to attract men” which is… not a thing my sapphic ass has any significant desire to do. However, since I don’t believe that the ways these these pheromone perfumes work actually has anything to do with gender (or indeed with pheromones), I don’t see any reason they shouldn’t also help me to feel sexy, confident and badass as I venture out attempting to meet women!

The TL/DR version is that I absolutely love both of these gorgeous fragrances.

Eye of Love Perfume: “Sunny Daze”

Sunny Daze is a sweet and floral perfume with top notes of bergamot, middle notes of Damascus rose, and base notes of jasmine. The rose comes out most strongly for me in this one, with the overall effect being super flowery. The jasmine comes through more after I’ve been wearing it for a while, softening and mellowing the rose fragrance so it’s not too overwhelming.

Sunny Daze is light and easy to wear, with just one or two spritzes needed to last me all day.

This one makes me think of strolling through a rose garden with a sweetie, or maybe sniffing a rose while wearing an ultra-girly floral dress. It evokes the pinks, reds, yellows, and oranges of blooming roses and the warmth of the sun on my back.

Eye of Love Perfume: “Lilac Dream”

If Sunny Daze is a wholesome daytime scent, Lilac Dream is its slightly more sultry twin that’s perfect for evening wear. Its top notes of vanilla and apple blossom are complemented by the middle notes of cashmere wood and base notes of musk, giving it a feminine yet warm, earthy vibe.

Lilac Dream is still light and summery, but with a hazy, romantic edge to it. This is the kind of perfume I’d spray on to have dinner at an outdoor restaurant or to head out for drinks by the beach when I’m on holiday somewhere hot.

Over time, the vanilla—which is the most prominent scent when I first spray this perfume on—fades into the background and allows the musky, woody notes to shine.

Eye of Love Classic Collection Pheromone Perfume Review: “After Dark” and “One Love”

Eye of Love After Dark and One Love pheromone perfumes in boxes

Finally, I received “After Dark” and “One Love,” two pheromone perfumes from Eye of Love’s Classic Collection, to test and review.

Classic Collection “After Dark” Review

Eye of Love describes its After Dark scent as follows:

Sharp. Sexy. Bold. Want your evening to end with more than just a kiss? After Dark is the perfect scent to accompany you on a nighttime tryst or bring the passion back to life with your partner.

After Dark is definitely the sexier of these two classic fragrances. It contains top notes of galbanum oil, lily and grapefruit, middle notes of white chocolate and jasmine, and base notes of costus root, ambergris, and vanilla. The florals don’t come out as strongly as they do in some fragrances, and the overall effect is quite sultry. It calls to mind the kind of kiss you share at the end of an amazing first date, the kind of kiss that you just know is leading to a lot more.

This perfume feels quite androgynous to me, which isn’t always my personal vibe. However, I actually like this one more the longer I wear it. The initial sharpness wears down, leaving a warm fragrance with just a hint of underlying sweetness.

Classic Collection “One Love” Review

Eye of Love After Dark and One Love pheromone perfumes

Eye of Love describes One Love as “refined femininity at its peak”. It contains top notes of orange, middle notes of jasmine, rose and lily, and base notes of musk, ambergris and vanilla. For me, the vanilla comes through the most strongly when I first apply the perfume. Over the next few hours as it settles onto my skin, it mellows and the rose and lily take centre stage.

One Love is a light, floral, and summery scent. It’s a fragrance I’d spritz on for a picnic date with a cutie in the park or to sit outside and drink cocktails on a sunny patio (the latter being exactly what I did with a friend the first time I wore this fragrance!) It evokes long warm evenings, long fruity drinks, and smelling the flowers on the nighttime breeze as we walk home.

This one is ultra femme and pleasingly easy to wear. It also lasts well, with a distinctive scent still detectable on my skin many hours after applying it.

How Did I Feel Wearing Eye of Love Pheromone Perfumes and Did They Actually Work to Make Me Feel Sexier?

I received Eye of Love pheromone perfume to review at an… interesting time. I’m not dating at the moment, mostly because I’m still recovering from the most brutal breakup of my entire life. So opportunities for trying pheromone perfumes out in actually “sexy” contexts to see if they’d actually work for me were few.

However, I did manage to find a few chances to try them while out with friends or Mr C&K. I’ve also been wearing them around the house to see if they can help to lift my mood amidst my endless fog of post-breakup depression, even if just for a moment.

As I mentioned up at the top of this post, I’m cynical. I’d need to see a lot more hard evidence to believe that pheromone perfume has any scientific merit behind it.

What I do believe in, though, is using cosmetics—including perfumes—to feel more like myself, evoke the kind of mood I want to project, and boost my confidence. I find scent powerful, and I do feel myself walking a little taller and smiling a little more when I know my makeup looks good and I smell nice. Who doesn’t feel more confident with a spritz of a scent that makes them feel most like themselves? Confidence is the sexiest thing of all to many people, and it’s something I have been sorely lacking in the last couple of months.

There’s even something a little bit magical in spraying on something from a bottle labelled “attract her.” The perfume probably won’t, in itself, attract her (whoever she is)… but maybe, when the time is right,I can? But it did help me to briefly remember what it feels like to see myself as sexy, attractive, and desirable. And right now? Honestly, that’s something.

Where to Buy Eye of Love Pheromone Perfume

All of these pheromone perfume products are available directly from Eye of Love:

Thanks to Eye of Love for sending me these pheromone perfumes to try. All views and experiences are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Header image for Bijoux Indiscrets Bubblegum Play Kit review

[Lube, Cosmetics & Massage Products Review] Bijoux Indiscrets Bubblegum Play Kit

Published on by Amy

One of the fun things about being both a femme and a sex blogger at this time of year is seeing all the sweet, cutesy, pink-and-hearts-and-flowers themed products that companies are putting out for Valentine’s Day. Bijoux Indiscrets were kind enough to send me this year’s Valentine’s offering from their range: the Bubblegum Play Kit which includes a lube, a massage oil, and a lipgloss.

Bijoux Indiscrets Bubblegum Play Kit: Lube, Massage Oil and Lipgloss

The Bubblegum Play Kit contains three products: a warming massage oil, a full-body massage gel that doubles as a water-based lube, and a lipgloss. Each one is scented and flavoured like bubblegum. All three products, like everything in Bijoux’s range, are vegan.

Bijoux Indiscrets bubblegum play kit

The kit came packaged in a cute pink box with a heart on the front, much like the packaging you might get on a gift set of cosmetics or bath products. The overall effect, like the products themselves, is sweet to the point of saccharine. But how did the contents stack up? Let’s take a closer look at each item.

Warming Massage Oil

Bijoux Indiscrets bubblegum massage oil

This isn’t really an oil in the true sense of the word. As far as I can tell, it doesn’t actually contain any oil at all. It’s really a water-based gel that warms as you massage it in. Still, we’ll call it “massage oil” to distinguish it from the other massage product in this kit.

For me, it takes about a minute to feel the massage oil warming on my skin. You’ll get a more intense warming sensation if you blow gently on it.

I found that the bubblegum massage oil didn’t really blend or get fully absorbed into the skin the way some oils and lubes do. Instead, it tends to linger on the surface. This can be a good thing, as a little bit goes a long way and there’s no need to keep reapplying it. However, it can also be a problem if you don’t enjoy the feeling of having oil or gel lingering on your skin.

This is by far the nicest tasting of the three products. It’s very, very, very sweet, so you’ll want to know that going on. That sweetness is likely due to its first ingredient: glycerin. Due to the glycerin, I found that my hands and skin felt quite sticky after using it and I wanted to wash it off. Glycerin is okay in a massage product in the way it wouldn’t be in a lube, but from a sensory perspective it is a downside to this bubblegum massage oil.

Stickiness aside, though, this is a fine massage gel and the sweet bubblegum taste and pink aesthetic gives it a fun and playful vibe.

You can buy this oil separately for €22/£20. It’s also available in caramel & sea salt and strawberry & honey flavours.

Full Body Bubblegum Massage Gel/Lube

Bijoux Indiscrets bubblegum massage gel/lube

According to Bijoux Indiscrets, this bubblegum flavoured water-based massage gel can double up as an intimate lube. It has quite a long list of ingredients, so you’ll want to review it carefully to make sure there’s nothing you’re sensitive to.

I can’t see anything alarming in the ingredients, but I’m also not enough of an expert to declare them all definitely fine. At the very least this bubblegum gel/lube contains no glycerin or parabens, though it does contain “Aroma” (artificial fragrance/flavour) which is not very specific and can include any number of things.

I do quite like the feeling of this one. It’s somewhere between a thick liquid and a thin gel, and it spreads across the skin nicely and lasts well. However, unlike the massage oil, this gel tastes really unpleasant to me. Instead of sweetness, it’s got a horrible chemical-y taste. I’m quite sensitive to artificial sweeteners and I can really, really taste them in this.

I probably won’t finish this one, honestly. I’m “meh” on flavoured lubes at best to begin with and this isn’t a nice tasting one.

Oral Pleasure Lip Gloss

Bijoux Indiscrets bubblegum lipgloss

This lip gloss is more subtly flavoured than the lube and massage oil, but still has a distinctive bubblegum flavour.

After you apply it, you start getting a tingling sensation thanks to the peppermint oil it contains. I think, based on the name, the idea is that you put it on and then perform oral sex with it. I haven’t had the opportunity to try that but I did try putting a bit on my vulva, just to see what the effect would be. It gave a kinda pleasurable tingly, warming feeling a bit like a warming lube or menthol pleasure balm. So that effect might translate if you used it during oral?

The warming and tingling is really noticeable on my lips, to the point that it becomes uncomfortable if I use too much. You really only need a little bit of this one.

This lipgloss lasts well and gives a nice glossy shine. It’s a little sticky, which wasn’t a problem once it was on but made applying it with my fingers annoying. A brush or wand would be better than the pump top bottle. Neither the lube nor the lipgloss are ass aggressively sweet as the massage oil in the Bubblegum Play Kit.

Verdict

I generally liked two out of the three products in this kit and will definitely finish them, though the bubblegum lube was a miss for me. However, at €60/£54 it’s pretty pricey for what it is. For that reason I don’t think I’d buy it again.

If you have a femme in your life who really likes pink things and bubblegum, though, it could be a cute and sensual Valentine’s Day gift.

Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me this product to review! All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

A woman with long red hair facing away. She is wearing a skin-tight wet look mini dress and holding a riding crop. Text reads: Lovehoney Fierce review.

[Fetishwear Review] Lovehoney Fierce Range: Catsuit, Lace-Up Bra Set, and Wet Look Cut-Out Mini Dress

Published on by Amy1 Comment

Halloween is coming, which can mean only one thing: scary, kinky parties! So naturally, I’m already planning my outfits for some adventures at the end of the month. In honour of spooky season, Lovehoney kindly sent me a few pieces from their Fierce collection to try and review: the Fierce Catsuit, Wet Look Cut-Out Mini Dress, and Lace-Up Bra St.

Update: A Note on Materials

These pieces from the Lovehoney Fierce range are all made of a black faux-leather, wet-look fabric, which is a polyester/elastane mix. Though they are not animal-derived and are therefore technically vegan, I don’t love that Lovehoney is using synthetic (read: plastic-derived) materials. These fabrics are awful for the environment, both in production and after you discard them.

Since I first wrote these reviews a few years ago, I’ve learned a lot more about fabrics, their eco implications, and the impact of textile waste. Personally, with what I know now, I would not buy these pieces new today. However, since I already own and like them, I’ll be wearing and caring for them for as long as I can to extend their lifespan.

I’m not going to tell you to avoid polyester entirely, as unfortunately it’s ubiquitous. However, I will offer the following tips to help you minimize your impact if you do choose to buy and wear synthetic fabrics,

  1. Buy second hand wherever you can
  2. If you must buy new, only choose pieces you really love
  3. Wear and care for your items for as long as you can
  4. Mend, upcycle/repurpose, resell, donate, or recycle at the end of the item’s life

All Lovehoney Fierce items are hand-wash only. Use cold water and a little gentle detergent, then dry them on the washing line. Studies have shown that handwashing results in far fewer microplastics being shed from polyester clothes, so following these instructions also reduces the environmental impact of your polyester garments.

With that said, let’s dive into the reviews.

Lovehoney Fierce Wet Look Cut-Out Mini Dress

Lovehoney wet look minidress product photo
Image: Lovehoney

The Fierce Wet Look Cut-Out Mini Dress is a luscious deep, shiny black that catches the light when you move.

I debated whether to categorise this piece as clothing or as lingerie. It’s definitely a dress, but it’s also extremely short. Unless you’re maybe 5’2″ or under, this is not going to be something you can wear to an ordinary club or bar. It fastens up the front with a zipper, and the collar closes with bra style clasps with three tightness settings to choose from. Once you fasten the collar, you get a cut-out peephole neckline which is super sexy and shows off your cleavage or upper chest. The Fierce Wet Look Cut-Out Mini Dress is a rare gem for me: a garment that works with my G-cup chest, rather than fighting against it.

The Fierce Wet Look Cut-Out Mini Dress is designed to fit snugly. These pieces run pretty true to size, in my experience, but I’d recommend sizing down rather than up if you’re between sizes. Thanks to the lack of wires, this dress is pretty comfortable. However, the synthetic fabric doesn’t really breathe so it gets extremely hot after a while especially if you’re in a warm environment.

I feel sexy in a vampy sort of way in this dress. I love the way it enhances the curve of my waist and hips and shows off my shape at its best. I’ll likely pair it with some killer heels, sexy stockings, and kitty ears for a full Halloween look. This range is well-named—it really does make me feel fiercely fabulous!

Buy the Lovehoney Fierce Wet Look Cut-Out Mini Dress for £34.99 from Lovehoney UK or $47.99 from Lovehoney North America.

Feline Fierce: Lovehoney Wet Look Catsuit

Lovehoney model in black PVC wet look catsuit
Image: Lovehoney

The Lovehoney Fierce Wet Look Catsuit, like the Cut-Out Minidress, is shiny and catches the light beautifully. It features a collar neckline which fastens with bra-style clasps, and a cleavage-displaying cut out section at the front. Mesh panels at the hips show a glimpse of skin.

The Lovehoney Fierce Wet Look Catsuit fastens with a single, long zip that runs from the centre of the chest all the way to the top of the butt. With a zip pull at each end, you can choose how open or closed you want the front. You can also unzip the back for easy access for sex without needing to take the whole thing off.

This one also runs fairly true to size but, again, I suggest sizing down rather than up if you’re between sizes. It’s supposed to be skin-tight. The legs were a little long for me, though, and I’m a fairly average 5’5″. Something to be aware of if you’re on the shorter side.

The material is soft and comfortable to wear, The overheating issue is a major consideration, though, since it’s non-breathable and covers most of your body.

Skin-tight black clothing is typically associated with a dominatrix look. However, I’m much more inclined towards the subby end of the spectrum. Fortunately, clothing can be whatever you make it. I feel like I can definitely use this piece to tap into aspects of my submissive self. It’s also perfect for pet-play enthusiasts, those looking to add a sex kitten twist to their bedroom or club look, or anyone who loves skintight shiny things but can’t be bothered with the faff of wearing latex.

The Lovehoney Fierce Wet Look Catsuit retails for £44.99 from Lovehoney UK or $59.99 from Lovehoney North America.

Lovehoney Fierce Lace-Up Bra Set

The Lovehoney Fierce Lace-Up Bra Set on the model
Image: Lovehoney

The Lovehoney Fierce Lace-Up Bra Set is a two-piece set consisting of a non-wired, halter-neck bra and a pair of high-waisted knickers. Both have cut-out sections with lace-up detailing. The knicker waist and the bra band are made of stretchy elastic.

As the elastic is stretchy and the bra has 3 clasp options and a tie-up halterneck, the sizing is somewhat adjustable. I usually wear a UK size 14/16 and the large fits me comfortably. Some reviewers noted that the knickers were on the small side so, unlike the catsuit and minidress, I suggest going up a size if you’re between sizes.

The fabric feels nice against my skin, and the stretchy elastic waist and underbust bands mean nothing is digging in or pinching. Overall, surprisingly comfortable! So the moment of truth: did it contain my chest?The answer to that is… kind of.

My boobs mostly fit into the cups and stay put when I wear this set, particularly when I tie the halterneck quite tight to give them a little extra lift. However, there’s usually a bit of nipple slippage when I’ve been wearing it for a while.

The Lovehoney Fierce wet look lace-up bra set set is very much my style. The feminine silhouette with a kinky edge just speaks very much to my personal aesthetic goals. Lovehoney describe it as a “Dominatrix-inspired look,” but that’s just one possible interpretation. The open panels, easy access through the lacing, and crotchless knickers all speak to vulnerability to me, which helps me tap into my submissive headspace when I’m wearing it.

The laced up detailing really makes this set for me. It’s just the right level of showing off my body while leaving enough to the imagination.

This set retails £34.99 from Lovehoney UK or $47.99 from Lovehoney North America.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the Fierce Lace-Up Bra Set, Catsuit, and Wet-Look Cut-Out Mini Dress to review. All views are, as always, my own. This post contains affiliate links.

A woman in a black bodysuit lying on a bed for a Lovehoney Lingerie bodysuit review round-up. Text reads: Four Lovehoney Bodysuits I Adore

[Lingerie Review] Four Lovehoney Bodysuits I Adore and How I Style Them

Published on by Amy

I don’t often do lingerie reviews any more, as styles come and go so fast, but Lovehoney’s bodysuits are some of the pieces that I come back to again and again. Bodysuits are consistently the most comfortable, most body-friendly, and most versatile items of lingerie for me. Most of them don’t have wires, which is important from both a comfort perspective and because wired pieces are usually woefully inadequate for my G-cup chest.

Let’s talk about four of my favourite bodysuits and some of the ways I style them.

Lovehoney Lingerie Review: Hourglass Open Cup Crotchless Bodysuit

The Lovehoney Hourglass Open Cup Bodysuit is made of black floral lace and microfibre, with an open crotch and removable straps that frame your breasts. It also has removable suspender straps.

This piece, available in UK sizes 6 to 28, is designed to be wearable either on its own or under clothing as “shapewear.” Its stretchy, soft fabrics and adjustable straps make it comfortable to wear. Since this piece is open cup, you don’t need to worry about cup sizes! The Lovehoney Hourglass Bodysuit is a godsend for people like me with large chests; many of the lingerie items I’ve reviewed over the years have been difficult or impossible to wear. You can easily wear this bodysuit either by itself or with a bra.

The aesthetic of the Lovehoney Hourglass Open Cup Bodysuit a kind of femme soft-bondage.

Despite striving to be body-positive and doing continual work on my self-image, there are still parts of my own body that I struggle with. Most notably, I have a complex relationship with my stomach. So pieces that hide the bits of my body I’m less confident about, while emphasising the bits I do love (waist, breasts), are basically the holy grail of lingerie to me. I also adore the way this piece’s lace panels cling to the curve of my hips.

The Hourglass Open-Cup Crotchless Bodysuit retails for £32.99 from Lovehoney UK or $39.99 from Lovehoney US.

Lovehoney Lingerie Review: Fierce Leather-Look Lace-Up Body

Lovehoney’s Fierce range offers a sexy and affordable alternative to expensive materials such as leather and latex. Of all the pieces I’ve reviewed from the Lovehoney Lingerie Fierce range, I find this bodysuit the easiest to wear.

The simple cut of this piece allows the halterneck, lace-up detailing at the hips and cleavage, and shiny fabric to take centre stage. This Lovehoney bodysuit is less adjustable than some of the pieces I’ve covered in this review, but the halterneck style allows for some adjustability. It also makes this piece one of the better options for larger chests.

The Lovehoney Fierce Leather-Look Lace Up Bodysuit is fairly comfortable thanks to its lack of wires or scratchy fabrics. However, like the other pieces in the Fierce range, it can get very hot after a while due to the non-breathable synthetic fabrics.

The Fierce Bodysuit retails for £34.99 from Lovehoney UK or $47.99 from Lovehoney US.

Crotchless Deep Plunge Black Lace Bodysuit Review

I love fishnet. It’s endlessly cool and adds instant sex appeal to any look. I own fishnet tights in several different colours, and this Lovehoney Lingerie mesh bodysuit is one of my favourite pieces I’ve reviewed.

The deep plunge neck of this Lovehoney bodysuit is ideal for those with larger chests. I adore the way it shows off my cleavage while a hint of nipple pokes through the mesh. Another really sexy option is to wear this one with nipple pasties. I also love the thin band around the waist, which lends shape to the piece without pulling too much focus away from the cleavage.

This one size piece is suitable for UK sizes 6-16.

The Lovehoney Mesh Bodysuit is open at the back, framing the butt. Ideal for spanking scenes, if that’s your thing! The tie-up waistband and halterneck make it somewhat adjustable, and the stretchy mesh makes it easy and comfortable to wear. This piece is particularly ideal for play parties in hot venues as it allows my skin to breathe.

The Lovehoney Mesh Bodysuit retails for £16.99 from Lovehoney UK and $22.99 from Lovehoney US.

Late Night Liaison Blue Lace Bodysuit Review

This one piece Lovehoney bodysuit is the only blue piece of lingerie I’ve ever received for review! It is also available in red if that’s more your style. With a plunging neckline and strap detailing around the hips and between the breasts, it also features criss-cross strap detailing at the back and a crotchless G-string gusset.

I absolutely adore the gorgeous, deep midnight blue colour of the Lovehoney Late Night Liaison Bodysuit. This is a relatively unusual colour for lingerie, and it’s nice to see something different.

The delicate floral pattern on the lace is beautiful, and I love the scalloped edges. The straps that sit between the breasts add some interesting detail, and I like the way they draw attention to my cleavage. The extra coverage is also useful for days when I’m not feeling so confident about my stomach.

This piece is available in One Size (UK 6-16) and Plus Size (UK 18-24.)

This isn’t the most forgiving piece for large chests, and I definitely get some nipple slippage when I wear it. I can’t be too upset, though, when it’s so pretty and makes me feel so good to wear. The adjustable straps do help. When Lovehoney Lingerie first sent me this piece to review, I thought I might end up passing it along to a friend. But I ended up keeping it and loving it more than I expected!

The Late Night Liaison Body retails for £29.99 from Lovehoney UK or $36.99 from Lovehoney US.

How to Style a Bodysuit

Of course, the most basic way to wear a bodysuit is on its own. And these pieces are sexy enough that they don’t need anything else. However, whether you enjoy getting dressed up for your partner (or yourself) in the bedroom, are looking for kink party outfit ideas, or are feeling daring in your outfit choice for a night out dancing, there are so many different ways to style a bodysuit.

I’ve worn a bodysuit with sky-high heels and a tiny hat fascinator for a play party, but I’ve also worn the Fierce Leather Look one with a swishy skirt, fun tights, and stompy boots for a night at a vanilla club. I once went to a candy-themed play party wearing the Lovehoney Lingerie Open Cup Bodysuit I reviewed above with candy nipple tassles! And I love the fishnet piece with fishnet tights in a bright colour for a match/contrast effect.

Why not pair your favourite bodysuit with a pair of skinny jeans or skintight leather trousers, throw a blazer or leather jacket over one for a fun casual/glam mash-up, or pair one with an underbust corset? Get creative with it; there’s no wrong answers here. Lingerie is supposed to be fun!

Thanks to Lovehoney Lingerie for sending me the bodysuits featured in this post to review. Affiliate links appear in this post. All views, as always, are mine.

Young woman wearing a pink BDSM collar and pink leather handcuffs

11 Things a Collar Can Mean (But Doesn’t Have To)

Published on by Amy

What is the meaning of a collar in BDSM? Ask ten BDSM enthusiasts what collaring means to them and you’ll get 20 different answers. Not all kinksters use collars in their play or D/s relationships. Amongst those who do, they can have vastly different meanings depending on context and the people involved.

A simple band around the neck can take on many different significances and be worn in many different ways. As with anything in BDSM, Here are some I thought of, though I am sure there are many more.

A Lifetime Commitment: Collaring as a BDSM Marriage

Some kinksters view their collar as akin to a wedding ring. They may or may not also be legally married to their partner, and they may or may not also wear a traditional wedding ring, but they view their collar as the outward symbol of their lifetime commitment to a BDSM relationship.

Some couples choose to formalise their collaring with a ceremony. This can be performed privately or in front of friends and loved ones.

BDSM Collar Meaning: Permanent Ownership

Some people use “owner/property” dynamics as part of their kinky relationships. In these contexts, the submissive may wear a collar as a symbol that they are the property of their partner. Some couples choose a permanent collar that cannot be removed without a key. If you go down this route, always make sure the wearer has a spare in case of an emergency.

BDSM Collar Meaning: Temporary Ownership

Not all kinksters want to be in a 24/7 or lifetime BDSM relationship, but still want to go deeply into a Dominant or submissive headspace. For these people, a collar can serve as a sign of temporary ownership, whether for the length of a scene, a day, a weekend, or longer. However, when the collar comes off or the context changes, the ownership dynamic also ends or transitions back into an equal partnership.

Self-Collaring: A BDSM Collar Meaning “I Belong to Me”

I have a collar I bought for myself. When I wear it, it’s a reminder that I am owned by no-one but myself. My body, my choices, and my heart are mine. I might choose to give them away to trusted people for short amounts of time, but they always come back to me at the end. Self-collaring can be a reminder to be true to yourself, a way to access your submissive identity when you don’t have a dominant, a reminder to take care of yourself, and so much more.

Keeping a Connection and Closeness Alive with a Collar

Perhaps you’re in a long-distance or non-nesting relationship. Maybe you just want to feel close to your partner and keep your D/s dynamic alive when you’re not physically together. Regardless of your circumstances, wearing a collar can be a great way to do this. Many couples choose a day collar for this purpose, which can symbolise your relationship without raising any eyebrows in public.

Collars of Consideration or Training

Some people who practice formal BDSM relationships follow a series of steps leading up to permanent collaring. During this process, the submissive may wear a “training collar” or “collar of consideration” for a period of time before receiving their permanent collar. As with anything in a BDSM dynamic, negotiate the meaning of each collar clearly with your partner at every step of the process.

Collars as a Way of Getting Into a Headspace

Whatever your kinky headspace looks like, putting a collar on your submissive partner or having one put on you can be a “shortcut” to accessing that headspace. For people who play at events or parties, putting on the collar at the start of the night is often part of the getting-ready ritual.

Collars Signalling “Leave Me Alone, I’m Taken”

This isn’t foolproof, but I’ve found that if I’m attending a kink event unpartnered and I don’t want to be hit on, wearing a collar will significantly cut down on the unwanted attention I receive.

Because BDSM collars can have so many different meanings and not everyone is monogamous, people won’t necessarily assume that your collar means you’re unavailable. But at least some likely will. Think of it as the kinky equivalent of flashing a wedding ring when the creepy guy at the bar isn’t getting the hint.

No Deep Meaning: A Collar as a BDSM Tool

For some people, a collar is part of a scene that’s there for what it can do rather than what it means. This might mean attaching a leash to lead your submissive around a party, cuffing their hands to their collar to immobilise them, or using it to tug them in for a kiss.

Collars as Decorations or Fashion Accessories

Collars look pretty and can add a kinky twist to an outfit quickly and easily. I have one I love that was sent to me for review. It has no meaning attached to it and isn’t connected to any particular relationship. I wear it because I like how it looks.

Flagging Kinky in Public

The idea of flagging originates from the “hanky code”, which was pioneered by gay and bisexual men in the 1970s. Coloured handkerchiefs placed in certain positions are used to indicate interest in various sexual roles and practices. Flagging has come to refer more broadly to using outward symbols to subtly indicate your proclivities to other interested parties.

There are many spaces where, though they’re not kink-specific events, a lot of the participants will likely be kinky. Think adults’ LGBTQ+ community events, goth clubs, geek and sci-fi events, Renaissance Fairs, and so on. In these spaces, the meaning of a BDSM collar can be “hey, we have this thing in common!”. You might even make some new friends.

The Taboo Brighton Logo

This post was sponsored by Taboo Brighton. Taboo launched in 2003 and has established itself as a genre-defining Brighton retail experience. The store was awarded “Best Sex Shop in the UK” at the Erotic Trade Awards. It was also once described in The Guardian as the “Dolce and Gabbana of Sex Shops”. All views and writing are mine.