[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Rings “Pyramids” and “Tall Pyramids”

If you’re anything like me, “spikes” probably isn’t a word you associate with something you want near your genitals. Well, the newest Grind Ring designs from Godemiche, known as “Pyramids” or “Pyramid Spikes” and “Tall Pyramids”, a variation on the popular “Spike” texture, are a happy exception to that generally-sensible rule.

That’s right, I’m back again with another Godemiche Grind Rings review!

In Case You’re New Here…

If you’re new, you may have missed my previous posts, in which I outline what a Grind Ring is and some of the many ways you can use it. Check them out here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3. If you’re considering getting one, these reviews will also help you decide which texture is likely to work best for you.

In brief, here’s a description of what they are and how they work:

The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding, dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

Each Grind Ring measures 6 inches in length and 4.3 inches across at the widest point. They feature a stretchy hole for a penis or dildo to fit through at the base. They’re designed to be used during penetrative sex for additional clitoral stimulation, but they’re actually really versatile and can be used in all sorts of ways, from getting you off while you’re sitting at your desk writing erotica, to changing up hand sex with different textures.

The Two New Textures

I received the new “Pyramid Spikes” and “Tall Pyramid Spikes” textures, which are exactly what they sound like. Here’s what they look like:

Pyramid Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings from Godemiche

As with all Godemiche products, you can choose from an array of gorgeous colours for your Grind Ring. I asked for purples and greens, and I received the Tall Pyramid Spikes in Winter Berry and the Pyramid Spikes in a mix of Ruby Rose and Garden Party. (As a general rule, Grind Rings are only available in single colours, so I feel very privileged to have received a limited edition one in my two favourite colours!)

The colours have a subtle shimmer and a really lovely swirling effect that you can see on the back:

Back view of Godemiche Grind Rings

Most importantly, though, how did they feel?

Pyramids

Adam from Godemiche says that the Pyramids Grind Ring texture was “inspired by a belt I happened to see someone wearing while out grocery shopping. It reminded me of my own ‘skater boy’ days when none of my trousers fit and I often opted for a studded belt to keep them around my thighs.” If you can’t picture what he means, think something like this.

I expected the Pyramids to feel a lot like the Spikes, but they really don’t. They’re less flexible, and still soft but with an overall firmer texture. I found the sensation from the Pyramids to be quite subtle compared to other designs in the range. I can best describe the feeling as a kind of pressure with some gentle texturing. For a point of comparison, the Pyramids is about on a par with the Bubbles for me, intensity-wise.

I’m unlikely to each orgasm with this one, but it’s a good warm-up texture before moving onto something more intense.

Tall Pyramids

I think the Tall Pyramids might have overtaken the Waves as my favourite Grind Ring texture of all!

The square spikes are noticeably smaller than those on the Spikes ring (see the below picture for comparison). So though that’s probably the closet comparison, they’re really quite different in use.

Godemiche Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings

The Tall Pyramids are very soft and very flexible. Since they’re so soft, they really don’t feel “pointy” at all.

You can get a range of sensations from the Tall Pyramids Grind Ring. In my experience, if I grind down hard against it, I get an all-over rubbing sensation, whereas if I support some of my weight and just glide my vulva along it, it’s more of a gentle tickle.

I think I like this texture best because you get constant stimulation as the spikes slide along your vulva. The little pyramids feel like dozens of little silicone tongues lapping at and around my clit. As you grind, they flick back and forth, offering both direct clitoral stimulation and all-over vulva pleasure.

Verdict

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: these toys are so genuinely innovative and just so damn good! They’re all very different and, interestingly, I think overall the Pyramids is my least favourite of the six and the Tall Pyramids is my favourite. But all the designs are good, it’s just a matter of individual preferences which one will work best for you.

Such a simple idea, so brilliantly executed.

Grind Rings retail for £34.99. You can get one hand-made to order in your choice of colour and texture, or grab one off-the-shelf for faster delivery.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me these Grind Rings in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post and using them sends me a small commission at no additional cost to you.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Morpheus

Many of you may be aware that I consider the Godemiche Ambit to be just about the most perfect silicone dildo in existence. The size, the curve, the flex… it’s all there. The fact that it comes in a huge array of colours, combinations, and even sparkly and pride flag options doesn’t hurt, either.

That’s why I was very keen to try out Godemiche’s new dildo, the Morpheus, which went on sale today.

I received the Morpheus in Emerald Glitter, a beautiful and bright shade of sparkly green. In the sea of near-endless pink/black that is the sex toy industry, being able to get things in different and unexpected colours is one of Godemiche’s big selling points.

Seriously, look how pretty it is!

Godemiche Morpheus green glittery silicone dildo

The Morpheus is made from body-safe, easy-care silicone. It’s hypoallergenic, condom compatible, and sterilising is as easy as throwing it in a pan of boiling water for a few minutes.

How does the Morpheus differ from the Ambit?

Like the Ambit, the Morpheus comes in an array of different sizing options. I received the Morpheus Thin Small, which measures 5.7″ in total length (5.3″ insertable) and 1.1″ wide at the centre of the shaft. There’s also a Thin Medium, Thick Small, and Thick Medium option. So whatever your length and girth preferences, you should be able to find a Morpheus to suit you.

The most notable difference between the Morpheus and the Ambit is that the former has a more pronounced curve. Here’s what they look like next to each other:

Godemiche Ambit and Morpheus silicone dildo comparison

The Morpheus’s head is also more gently tapered and less pronounced than the Ambit’s. This might make it more comfortable for some users and in some circumstances (more on my experiences with that in a minute).

Morpheus in use

The first thing I noticed about the Morpheus, once I’d finished admiring how sparkly and pretty it is, is that the silicone is quite matte and “grabby”. This just means it’s really, really important to use plenty of lube, which I always recommend anyway. A simple water-based lube will give you a pleasurable glide without damaging your toy (or staining the hell out of your sheets!)

Green glitter dildo

Unlike many sex writers I know, I’m not really into very girthy penetrative toys. I find that they cross the line from pleasurable to painful really quickly. When it comes to insertable things, I’m all about direct and targeted G-spot stimulation, which means that slimline toys with a decent curve tend to be the way to go. The Morpheus’s slimline shaft is perfect for my body in this regard.

Flexible dildo, green silicone dildo from Godemiche

This toy’s deep curve and bulbed head are also absolutely dreamy. The head is the ideal size for focused G-spot pressure, and the curve makes it easy to find the right spot. It’s also super flexible, which can help with comfortable insertion and positioning. I don’t have a prostate, being a cis woman, but if you’re someone who does I can imagine this toy would be equally perfect for P-spot play. Its flared base makes it anal safe.

The Morpheus comes with a nice wide base, so it’s perfect for popping into your strap-on harness if that’s your thing. I also appreciate this wider base designed because it makes for a convenient handle, making the toy easier to hold and manipulate.

Pro tip: fan of strong vibrations internally? Place a high-powered wand vibrator against the base of your dildo.

Verdict

Comfortable, slimline shaft? Check. Great curve? Check. Pronounced head for targeted G-spotting? Check. On all counts, the Godemiche Morpheus is a genuinely excellent dildo and a worthy addition to the company’s range and my collection. It’s also currently living on my desk because it’s so sparkly it makes me happy every time I look at it.

The Morpheus retails from £44.99 – £52.99 depending on which size you go for.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me this product to review. All views are, as ever, my own. Affiliate links appear within this post.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Ring “Hearts”

Happy Valentine’s Day, loves!

I’m generally not too fussed about Valentine’s Day these days. In non-plague times it’s as good an excuse for a date as any, but I’m not super into the idea of expressing love just because it’s a particular date. I’d rather show my love all year round. With that said, I’ve decided to mark the day in two ways: I’m wearing my “DM Me” heart tights from Snag, and I’m bringing you a review of Godemiche’s new Grind Ring texture, “Hearts”.

What is a Grind Ring and how do you use it?

If you’re new here, you may have missed my previous reviews (part 1 and part 2) of the Grind Ring collection. In Godemiche’s own words:

The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding, dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

They measure 6 inches in length and 4.3 inches across at the widest point, and feature a stretchy hole for a penis or dildo to fit through at the base.

There are currently six textures available, of which Hearts is the newest addition. I knew I wanted my Hearts Grind Ring in a Valentine’s-themed colour, so I opted for Ruby Rose. It’s a gorgeous and shimmery red/pink, and on the flat back side of the toy you get a beautiful marbling, swirling effect. Here’s what it looks like:

Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring, Valentine's Day sex toy
Back of Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring, Valentine's Day sex toy for women and people with clits

The intended purpose of a Grind Ring is to wear it around the penis or dildo during penetrative sex with someone with a clitoris, so that the receptive partner can grind against it and enjoy additional clitoral stimulation (which, as we know, is essential to reach orgasm for a significant majority of cis women and other people with vulvas).

However, as I’ve discovered, there are numerous other ways to enjoy this toy. While it’s certainly fun to use during P-in-V sex with my partner, I actually mostly use my Grind Rings by placing them on a firm surface (my desk chair is ideal) and grinding against it from a seated position. I also regularly use them as an accessory for hand sex, as that allows me to feel all the lovely texture while having finer control over the pressure and angle. Other good options include using it with a dildo for solo sex, or placing it over the head of a powerful wand vibrator.

As always, the only “right” way to use a toy is the way that feels right for you.

Texture: Hearts

So the Hearts Grind Ring is obviously cute as fuck. But how does it feel in use? I had a feeling I was going to get along well with this one as soon as I saw it, and I wasn’t disappointed. The hearts are sufficiently raised to provide a unique, and moderately intense, sensation. For a point of comparison, I’d describe the Hearts texture as less intense than the Spikes texture but more intense than the Waves or Bumps.

Due to the shape of the hearts, I find this Grind Ring is more intense on the downward motion than on the upward motion. The smooth silicone, coupled with the deeply ridged texture, is divine when paired with tonnes of lube. Of all the Grind Ring textures I’ve now tried, the Hearts is the one that gets me off the most quickly and the most consistently.

I’d recommend this one to people who enjoy firm pressure with their clitoral stimulation. It’s as functional as it is pretty and I’m a little bit in love.

Pro tip: I like to put a little clitoral balm on the toy itself for added intensity.

Verdict

Definitely a toy that’s not just for Valentine’s Day! I just received my Hearts Grind Ring a few days ago and it’s fast becoming an absolute favourite.

You know what else I love about these toys? Apart from the fact that they feel amazing, that is. As far as I can tell, there really isn’t anything else quite like this on the market. Genuine innovation is pretty rare in this industry, where copycat products and occasionally blatant design stealing are rampant. And oftentimes, when a sex toy is original in design, it’s also… kind of terrible. So to come across something that’s both actually innovative and actually good is a breath of fresh air.

The Hearts Grind Ring retails for £34.99. Get one for yourself or your favourite clit owner. You won’t regret it.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me this product to review. Affiliate links appear in this post. Buying through my links helps to keep the blog going at no additional cost to you. All views, as always, are mine.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Ring “Waves” and “Bumps”

This is the second part of a two-part series on the Godemiche Grind Ring! You can read part 1 here.

In the first part of this series, I decribed the Godemiche Grind Ring as a “revelation in sensation”. Having now tried the other two textures in the range – known as “waves” and “bumps” – I’m standing by that assessment and excited to gush even more about how much I love these genuinely amazing toys.

So What is a Grind Ring, Again?

A Grind Ring is a piece of silicone shaped a bit like a pizza slice, designed to fit around the penis or dildo during penetrative sex and provide extra external stimulation to a person with a clitoris. Each Grind Ring has a raised bulge and one of four textures. It can also be used in a whole bunch of other ways: combine it with a vibrator, put it on a sex position wedge or pillow and grind against it, or use it as an accompaniment to hand sex. Or, you know, whatever other creative ideas you can come up with!

Grind Rings are body-safe and easy to clean with soap and water (or a pot of boiling water).

The Toy for Smut Writers (and Readers!)

Are you a smutty writer? Do you, like me, sometimes find yourself getting turned on by your own words? Or do you just enjoy sitting at your desk and reading filthy words? If so, consider putting the Grind Ring on your desk chair and grinding against it as you read/write. The firm surface helps to keep it in place and provide some delicious pressure. I just discovered this possibility a few days ago and I can’t get enough of it. Thank goodness I finally have curtains back up in my office…

With that said, let’s look at the two remaining Grind Ring textures that I haven’t yet talked about: “Waves” and “Bumps”.

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone sex toy in Bubbles and Waves
Feat. “Bumps” in Aquamarine and “Waves” in Pastel Pearlescent Green

Texture 3: “Waves”

Just this morning, I told Mr CK I was writing up this review, and he asked me which of the Grind Ring designs I liked best overall. After thinking about it for a moment, I declared Waves my favourite.

Godemiche Waves Grind Ring clitoral sex toy

The Waves ring was also perhaps the biggest surprise. After feeling how soft the silicone ripples are, I wasn’t sure how much I’d be able to feel them. But when I ground against them, especially when they had a firm surface underneath, they felt like a series of continuous licks from little silicone tongues. Since the waves are so close together and flex as you rub against them, it’s a continuous sensation.

If I’m aroused and using plenty of lube, I can orgasm easily just by grinding my clit into the Waves Grind Ring.

Texture 4: “Bumps”

The Bumps Grind Ring is the perfect middle ground when I want something more intense than the Bubbles but less intense than the Spikes. The bumps are quite small and quite close together so whichever way I move against them, several of them are always making contact with my clit from various angles.

Godemiche Bumps Grind Ring sex toy for clit

I like to use the Bumps ring before moving on to the Waves or Spikes. It’s just the right level of intensity for a hot warmup. With that said, I could probably come on it with some perseverance and a little time. I’ll have to try – you know, for science.

Verdict

Now that I’ve tried out all four Grind Ring textures, I’m even more impressed and maybe even a little obsessed. They’re amazingly versatile and a brilliant way to experiment with different sensations to see what works for you.

If you have a clitoris, I can’t recommend Grind Rings highly enough. If you’ve tried them, which texture was your favourite?

Grind Rings retail for £34.99 each.

Also: there’s a new texture out! “Pyramid Spikes” has just hit the Godemiche website. If I can get hold of one, I’ll report back with a review. Stay tuned…

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me four Grind Rings in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post and if you use them, I make a small commission. All commissions help me to keep C&K going!

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Ring “Bubbles” and “Spikes”

This is the first post in a two-part series. Since the Grind Rings come in four different textures (and I hear there may be others in the works), I decided to review them in two sets of two rather than one epic post.

In their Twitter bio, Godemiche – the UK toy company made up of powerhouse married duo Adam and Monika – state that their goal is “not to break the mold, but recolour it.” I firmly believe that their Ambit is the most perfect dildo I have ever encountered, and their array of body-safe dildos, plugs, strokers, and gags are available in a dizzying array of colours and combinations. But despite this stated aim, their latest product, the Grind Ring, really does break a few molds.

In a world of endless knock-offs and derivatives, it is so refreshing when I see sex toy designers doing something genuinely new and innovative. And I have never come across anything quite like the Grind Ring before.

But what is a Grind Ring, how does it work, and – most importantly – is it good?

What is the Godemiche Grind Ring?

The Grind Ring is a toy (or actually a series of toys) designed for folks who enjoy clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex.

Godemiche describe it thus: The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding, dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

And yeah, that’s a pretty perfect description. Here’s what they look like:

Two Godemiche Grind Ring silicone sex toys

Since I typically default to getting everything in purple when I’m choosing sex toys, I decided to go for something a bit different this time. Pictured above are the Bubbles ring in Reefs Water, and the Spikes ring in Dragon’s Breath. The colours are as gorgeously vibrant as ever, and the silicone has this lovely marbled swirly effect that’s just so, so pretty:

Back of Godemiche Grind Ring clitoral stimulators showing pretty marbled silicone pattern

So How Does it Work?

Like the dutiful sex toy testers we are, my partner Mr CK and I initially tested the Grind Ring in the way it was intended to be used. After trying a few different positions, we concluded that by far the most effective way to use this toy was the me-on-top position. This meant I could effectively grind my vulva against the textured surface while he was inside me.

It also worked pretty well in the him-on-top position. Basically, any position that involves a lot of close, face-to-face bodily contact is probably going to work well. When we tried having sex with him standing and me lying on my back on the bed, this presented the opportunity for him to use his hand to stimulate my clit with the ring, which was also extremely fucking hot.

Since most people with vulvas need sustained clitoral stimulation to orgasm, Grind Rings are a great way to achieve that during penetrative sex (if you want to) and to experiment with different textures. While using a Grind Ring did not give me a clitoral orgasm during sex, it did up the intensity and add a whole bunch of additional hotness and pleasure to the experience.

Other Ways to Use the Grind Ring

The fun thing about sex toys is that you don’t have to just use them in the way they were originally designed to be used. Wand vibrators on penises or clitoral suckers on nipples, anyone?

The Grind Ring is no different. Girl on the Net posted a brilliant piece about using it “wrong” (there’s obviously no such thing!) and I was inspired to try her “textured Doxy wank” idea. And oof, yes, this is highly, highly recommended. I’ve also found that using the Grind Rings as an addition to hand sex, either solo or partnered, is fucking excellent. One of these and plenty of lube between my/my partner’s hand and my vulva is currently one of my favourite ways to get off.

Another option is to place the Grind Ring over a suitable firm surface, such as a couch arm, sex position wedge, or particularly firm pillow, and grind on it that way.

And don’t forget, of course, that if you or your partner don’t have a penis you can also use the Grind Ring with any dildo or strap-on.

Godemiche Ambit with Spikes Grind Ring
Feat. the Godemiche Bi Pride Ambit

Texture 1: Bubbles

The Bubbles Grind Ring looks like this:

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone clitoral stimulator in Bubbles

This was actually the first one we tried as an addition to penetrative sex. I wasn’t sure the texture would be noticeable enough to do anything but it really, really is.

Out of all the Grind Ring textures, Bubbles is by far my favourite as an addition to hand sex. It’s textured enough to offer something distinctive and different, but not so intense as to be too much. The smoothness, when coupled with plenty of lube, is divine when I or my partner rub it across my clitoral hood.

Texture 2: Spikes

The Spikes Grind Ring looks like this:

Godemiche Grind Ring clitoral stimulator in Spikes

My first thought when I saw this texture was “eek”. I know silicone is pretty soft, but even so, this looked like it might be too intense for my sensitive clit.

And it is… sometimes.

I have to be in a specific mood for the Spikes Grind Ring. And that mood is “extremely horny” and “in the mood for something so intense it’s almost too much”. It’s not painful, as the silicone is indeed very soft and squishy. It’s just… a lot. Of course, if you do find it painful, you could use it to indulge in a little consensual clitoral pain play if you like that sort of thing.

I did discover one absolutely amazing way to use this ring. If I lay it across my vulva and use a powerful vibrator over the top of it, the tips of the spikes transmit the vibrations in VERY interesting ways. You’re welcome!

Verdict

These things are a revelation in sensation, particularly the Bubbles ring. They’re effective for their intended purpose but also super versatile if you get a little creative.

Godemiche Grind Rings retail for £34.99 each and are hand-made to order in whatever combination of colour and texture you choose. Stay tuned for part 2 – “Waves” and “Bumps” – coming very soon!

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me these products in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post. If you use them to make a purchase, I’ll make a small commission at no extra cost to you. All commissions help fund C&K’s continued existence and keep me well-stocked with coffee!

[Toy Review] The Godemiche Offbeat

I’ve been sitting on this one for a long damn time, in part because it took us so long to get to actually testing it. But after giving it a second trial run this morning, I am ready to tell you all about the Offbeat from Godemiche.

It’s no secret that I fucking love Godemiche. This UK-based team run by husband-and-wife duo Adam and Monika have been making gorgeous, hand-poured silicone dildos for a number of years now… and now they’ve branched out into penis toys as well! (And yes, their marketing copy refers to the Offbeat as a “toy for the penis”, not a “toy for men” – hooray! I wish all companies would go this inclusive route).

The Godemiche Offbeat sitting on a red laptop keyboard.

Let’s go OffBeat…

The OffBeat is a tube-shaped silicone masturbator sleeve. Inside it has a simple bobble texture, while the outside has a gentle ripple. Each one has the company name stamped along the rim at the bottom, and the “G” Godemiche logo on the side. Each OffBeat comes in its own little storage tub – it looks like a miniature poster tube. This useful addition makes for easy and hygienic storage.

The Godemiche Offbeat lying on my desk

Sizes and colours and customising, oh my!

OffBeat comes in two sizes: Grande is 5cm in length, and Venti is 10cm in length. (And those who understand will know why these size names made me laugh!) Both sizes are 3cm in diameter. We received the longer Venti version for review. Even this larger size is compact and lightweight. Easy to throw in your bag for a date or a filthy weekend away!

Which size you pick is up to your preferences. If you prefer plenty of concentrated stimulation around the head of your penis, I suggest going for the smaller Grande. Godemiche point out that the Grande is also a great companion to oral sex. Simply tease the head of the penis for a while, then slide the Grande down the shaft and use it to stimulate the base of the penis while giving your partner head, simulating the feeling of a deeper blowjob. The longer Venti, on the other hand, is ideal if you prefer longer strokes and plenty of up-and-down motion. If you’re looking for something that comes closer to simulating penetration, you definitely want to go for the Venti.

The Godemiche Offbeat on a green carpet

One of my favourite things about Godemiche is the sheer variety of colours and styles on offer. Whatever colour toy you want, they can probably make it for you! I have a one-of-a-kind bi pride Ambit that I bought in a charity auction and it’s one of my favourite toys ever. I also bought a gorgeous red Adam in their last sale.

The OffBeat currently comes in 6 standard colours, 8 fabulously bright UV colours, and 12 gorgeous pearlescent colours. Ours is pearlescent gold and it’s absolutely beautiful.

A refreshing body-safe offering

Sex toy options for people with penises are often woefully lacking. This is gradually changing as awesome companies like Hot Octopuss, Fun Factory and now Godemiche start offering brilliant cock toys. Unfortunately, most of the strokers on the market are still made of porous and sometimes toxic materials such as jelly, rubber, PVC, TPE/TPR and the notoriously vague “Realistic Feel”.

So of course I am delighted that the OffBeat is made of 100% silicone. This means it is completely body-safe: non-toxic and non-porous.

The Godemiche Offbeat on a purple dildo sticking to some black bathroom wall tiles
Featured Stunt Dildo is the Lovehoney 7 Inch Suction Cup Silicone Dildo

To clean your OffBeat after use, turn it inside out and wash it thoroughly with warm water and gentle soap. Take extra care to ensure that no fluids remain trapped between the bobbles. You can also sterilise your stroker by sticking it in a pan of boiling water for 10 minutes, or running it through the dishwasher in the top rack.

If you want to share the toy with a non fluid-bonded partner, it’s easy to give it a wash between uses or you can just wear a condom, which shouldn’t impede the toy’s performance in any way.

For maximum comfort and pleasure, use a good quality water-based lube. I recommend slathering plenty of lube inside the stroker and also putting some directly on your penis.

So how does it feel?

Now, obviously I don’t have a dick, so I turned to my trusty stunt-cock Mr CK to help me out with this one. His reaction when I lubed up the toy and slid it onto his cock was instantaneous. Apparently the bobbles on the inside of the toy provided a good amount of friction and sensation without needing to grip very hard at all. This may make it a good choice for people who find gripping hard during masturbation difficult, such as those who suffer from pain in their hands. I certainly found it made pleasuring him for a decent length of time easier.

The Godemiche Offbeat on the side of a bath, around a purple dildo

Mr CK also explained that one of the things he likes about this toy is that it is so simple but really makes masturbation feel substantially different from usual. He likened it to the difference between wanking with your dominant vs non-dominant hand, or the difference between masturbating yourself and having someone else do it for you. Basically, if you’re looking to change up your usual masturbation routine, grab yourself one of these!

The gentle ripple shape of the outside of the sleeve means it sits comfortably in the hand, a finger in each dip. We also tried the toy with me pleasuring him with it, and found this was equally true whichever of us was doing the work.

Size-wise, this is a flexible toy. It stretches well and then “hugs” the penis once it’s inside, so would suit a wide variety of penis lengths and girths.

An absolute hit. I think this one is going to live in the “easy access basket” for things we use all the time.

(The Easy Access Basket just needs its own damn post, doesn’t it?)

Do we recommend it?

We really like this toy! It’s simple, highly effective, body-safe, affordable and should suit a wide range of bodies.

OffBeat retails for £25 for the Venti size directly from Godemiche. The smaller Grande size is £20.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending us the OffBeat in exchange for an honest review. All views in this post are our own and images were taken by me. This post contains a couple of affiliate links, which send a small commission my way when you buy from them. Links to Godemiche are non-affiliated.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Be My Valentine Ambit

I’ve been a Godemiche fangirl ever since I first encountered their beautiful, unique, colourful and fun dildos at Eroticon last year. So imagine my delight when they, via the always-wonderful Molly, offered me and my bits an early peek at their new Be My Valentine design.

The Be My Valentine Ambit is white and purple, and sparkly with little hearts. I squealed so hard when I took it out of the delivery box and ran upstairs to show it to Mr CK, who was quite bemused at how delighted I was.

Facts ‘n’ Figures

The toy’s diameter is about 1.6″ at the widest point, and the total insertable length is about six inches. It’s got a large, round base which makes it harness-compatible and also anal-safe. (Can we just talk for a minute about how much I want to put this into my strap-on and fuck another cute femme with it!? Because seriously.)

My ratings (all scores out of 5★)

Price: ★★★★★
The Be My Valentine Ambit is a limited-edition toy and will be retailing for £35, which is an absolute steal for a hand-poured silicone dildo of this quality!

Appearance: ★★★★★
My inner femme is squealing with delight at this toy. Look at it! It’s glittery with little purple hearts! I love it so much I want to put it out as a display item almost as much as I want to stick it in my genitals.

Feel: ★★★★★
The Be My Valentine Ambit is made of beautiful matte silicone, which is nice and soft as well as flexible. The curve of the shaft and bulge at the head somewhat mimics a bio-cock. The tip’s angle is just right to deliver glorious pressure to my G-spot.

I also found this dildo to be the perfect size for me. I’m not much of a size-queen, especially where length is concerned (my entire genital area will pack up and go “NOPE” if anything hits my cervix) but I like to feel pleasantly full, and the Be My Valentine Ambit delivered in that regard. Combined with my Doxy on my clit, it gave me an explosive orgasm.

Ease of Use: ★★★★★
The base fits neatly in my hand, making it super easy to hold and manipulate. It slid in smoothly with just a coating of water-based lube and is delightfully simple and comfortable to use.

Care, Cleaning & Body Safety: ★★★★
All Godemiche dildos are made from premium quality silicone, which is non-toxic and non-porous, meaning it’s completely body safe and should last for years if properly cared for.

Clean-up is easy. You can wash silicone dildos with soap and water, wipe them clean with a sterile medical wipe, or boil them in a pan of water for a few minutes to sterilise completely. Being basically penis-shape, it’s the perfect shape to use with a condom if you’re sharing it. Silicone is safe to use with both latex and latex-free condoms.

Overall score: ★★★★★
From my perspective at least, this toy is basically perfection in dildo form. If you are (or if you know) a #SparkleFemme then you need this in your life.

Thank you to Godemiche for sending me this toy in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are, and will always be, my own. Please support small businesses like Godemiche by buying their products, and if you’d like to support my work I will gladly take a virtual coffee.

Photo is by Godemiche and reproduced with permission.