I love covering niche kinks here on C&K. From inflation fetishes to ovipositors and much more, I love learning about why people are into the things they’re into. That’s why I’m pleased to be hosting this guest post on medical kink/fetish from Lorenz (he/him), the founder of Klinik Bondage. In it, he shares his unique perspective on medical restraints and the relationship between functionality and desire.
Amy x
Restraints for Medical Kink: How and Why Do People Use Them in BDSM? by Lorenz Engel
Medical kink is a form of erotic roleplay in which participants consensually explore scenarios inspired by clinical or hospital environments. This can include elements like physical exams, medical restraints, latex gloves, or clinical tools—often paired with a strong power dynamic, vulnerability, or the taboo of clinical authority.
For many, the appeal of this fetish lies in the psychological intensity: the blend of trust, control, and intimacy that comes from simulated “treatment.” Some also enjoy the aesthetic of medical settings, while others find the structure and formality arousing.
Though comprehensive statistics are limited, the information we do have suggests that medical play is a niche but significant interest in the BDSM community. For example, a 2015 Fetlife user survey by Dr. Brad Sagarin found that around 20% of respondents had engaged in some form of medical fetish play, with many citing its psychological edge and ritualistic nature as central to its appeal.
It is important to note that people with a medical kink do not typically find actual medical treatments arousing. This is an area where fantasy and reality sharply diverge.
Use of Restraints in Medical Kinks
People who have a medical kink or fetish sometimes use restraints to enhance the pleasure and power dynamics of these scenarios. For many players, restraints play an integral role in the kink.
Restraints such as leather cuffs, straps, or handcuffs can be used in role-playing scenarios where the restrained partner submits to the dominant one. The feeling of complete immobilization can make physical sensations more intense and create a more immersive psychological experience.
As with everything in BDSM and sex, medical play is based on mutual consent. Both/all partners must agree on boundaries, limits, and what activities are and are not on the table. Safewords and clear communication are essential.
How A Small BDSM Brand is Reinventing This Kink
For years, those interested in medical kink had limited options, often resorting to repurposed hospital equipment or makeshift solutions. However, our small German brand KlinikBondage® has recognized the unique needs of the BDSM community and created purpose-built, high-quality gear for medical players.
At KlinikBondage® we like to think that these key innovations set our products apart:
Long-Term Comfort: The restraints are designed for extended wear, with materials that are soft at key pressure points. This prevents discomfort while maintaining immobilization for the submissive partner.
Magnetic Locking System: KlinikBondage® incorporates powerful magnetic locks in our BDSM medical restraints, making them both secure and easy to release with specialized keys. These locks provide an added layer of control, ensuring that only the keyholder can grant freedom. For safety, we strongly recommend always keeping a spare key within reach and never leaving a bound person unattended. Consent, care, and risk mitigation are the foundation of every scene.
Customizable Bed Restraints: KlinikBondage® offers a variety of bed restraints that can be adapted to different bed sizes and setups, ensuring a perfect fit for any body and any scene.
Premium Materials: Made from high-quality and skin-friendly bio-cotton, our restraints are both durable and washable, making them ideal for long-term play without compromising hygiene or comfort.
More Than Just a Bed Restraint
While most people associate medical kink restraints with beds, their application in BDSM goes far beyond that. KlinikBondage® offers wrist and ankle cuffs, body harnesses and much more, designed for long-term immobilization, creating a full-body experience that emphasizes helplessness.
There’s also an increasing interest in self-bondage within medical-themed play. Devices like frost locks—time-release mechanisms using melting ice—allow solo players to experience prolonged immobilization while maintaining an element of safety. The psychological challenge of waiting for release can intensify the experience, adding layers of anticipation and mental endurance.
A word of warning here: solo bondage is a form of edge play and can be dangerous. Never restrain yourself without easy access to a quick-release mechanism for emergencies and a means of calling for help if you need it. And never, ever, ever put any kind of restraint around your neck or do anything to restrict your breathing.
Exploring the Depths of Control
Medical kink and restraint play in BDSM is not just about physical immobilization—it’s a journey into mental surrender. The feeling of being securely bound in a system designed for absolute stillness can be both calming and intensely erotic. Whether used for roleplay, sensory deprivation, or long-term confinement, medical restraints offer a structured and immersive way to explore deep levels of submission and control.
More than just a fetish, medical restraints bring a uniquely intense experience of restriction and immobilization to your kinky scenes.
About the Writer
Lorenz Engel is the founder of KlinikBondage, a German BDSM brand redefining modern fetish aesthetics. With a background in fiber engineering and a deep passion for the kinky community, he’s been pushing the boundaries of fetish aesthetics since 2020.
Heads up: this post contains sponsored links. All content and views are the writer’s own!
Some kinksters have always known they were kinky, sometimes from even before they had a word for it. Others come to kink and BDSM later on, after intensely questioning and examining their desires and fantasies. Have you ever agonised over the question “am I kinky?”, wondered if you’re kinky enough to claim the label and call yourself a part of the community, or felt stuck on how to explore your interest in kinky things?
If so, this post is for you.
What is Kinky?
This is where I always like to start when it comes to examining the question of whether a person is kinky: what even is kinky, anyway?
Wikipedia defines kinkiness as “the use of sexual practices, concepts or fantasies that are not conventional.” This general theme continues in other definitions I looked at. Justin Hancock, of sex education platform Bish UK, writes that “‘Kink’ is a set of pleasurable activities that people choose to do together that in other contexts are not pleasurable or usual.” The Cambridge Dictionary definies it as “a strange habit, usually of a sexual nature.”
But these definitions require us to ask ourselves: what is “conventional?” What is “usual?” In order to define what it means to step outside of these “norms”, we have to understand what the norms are in the first place.
Sexual norms, like other societal norms, are inherently subjective and informed by an array of factors from the social and political to the religious. Some people would say that the only “normal” sex to have is married, penis-in-vagina intercourse in the missionary position. Some would say that activities such as oral sex, anal sex, and mutual masturbation are completely “normal” and therefore not kinky. For others, however, having anal sex or masturbating in front of their partner might feel extremely kinky.
Pain is often associated with BDSM, but this isn’t always the case. My friend Violet Grey wrote a great guest blog about how kink isn’t all whips and chains. You don’t need to play with pain at all to be kinky, if you don’t want to. For some people, kink is entirely or mostly psychological. For others, it involves playing with intense or challenging sensations that are not necessarily painful (rope bondage, tickling kinks, and temperature play being just some obvious examples.)
Power play is another facet that often appears in kink, but doesn’t have to. Dominant and submissive dynamics – the D/s in BDSM – are one way to play with kink, but they are not essential to it. For example, some people enjoy sadomasochism (the consensual giving and receiving of pain) without any element of power imbalance.
Then there’s fetishism, which involves a sexual response to an item, body part, or activity that is not traditionally viewed as sexual. Foot fetishes, material fetishes (such as latex or rubber), and watersports (playing with pee) are just some examples of common fetishes. But do you need to have a fetish to be kinky? Nope!
I realise this might not be very helpful. I realise I’m offering lots of things that being kinky might mean, but no hard and fast litmus test. But that’s also part of the beauty of kink. You get to define what it means to you and for you.
Do you fantasise about, or take part in, sexual or sensual acts that feel in some way unconventional or “outside the norm” to you? If so, you might be kinky!
Am I Kinky Enough to Call Myself Kinky?
If you take nothing else from this piece, I hope you’ll remember this: there’s no such thing as “kinky enough”.
Much like queerness, ultimately the only test is “do you identify as kinky?” If so, then congratulations! You’re kinky! It’s also fine to take part in the community even if you’re not yet sure if you’re kinky, by the way. We’ll talk about this a bit more later on.
You don’t need to be into the most extreme things imaginable to call yourself kinky. Everyone has unique preferences, desires, limits, and boundaries. You also don’t need to be constantly trying out the next new hardcore thing! If the only kinky thing you ever want to do is get tickled with feathers, or have your wrists cuffed to the headboard during sex, or spank your lover? You’re kinky enough!
I can’t promise you won’t encounter any gatekeeping in the kink community. Sadly you might. After all, kink scenes are made up of people and people are sometimes dickheads. However, the vast majority of the people you meet will likely be completely lovely and non-judgemental. If anyone judges you for not being extreme enough or says that your kink isn’t really a kink, feel enormously free to ignore them. Or tell them to fuck off. That’s fun too.
6 Ways to Better Understand Your Kinks
If you think you could be kinky, you might already know exactly what you’re into. You might also have only a vague sense… or absolutely no idea yet! Whatever is true for you, it’s all fine. In this section, I’ll give you a few ideas for ways you can explore your kinky identity further and develop a deeper understanding of your kinks.
Take a BDSM Test
A BDSM test is an online quiz that asks you a series of questions to help you determine your kink identity, role, interests, or archetype. It can be a great place to start your explorations.
Remember that a BDSM test is supposed to be a guide, not Gospel. If your result doesn’t feel quite right for you, then that’s also useful information you can take forward. It can also be useful to revisit your BDSM test of choice every year or two. Chances are your preferences will evolve and your results might change, too. Mine certainly have!
Do a Yes/No/Maybe List
Yes/No/Maybe lists are checklists of all kinds of kinky activities. The idea is that you go through the list and indicate whether you’re a “yes”, a “no”, or a “maybe” to doing each thing. Some lists also have a column where you can indicate your level of interest and/or level of experience with each activity. They’re a great place to start exploring what types of kinky play might interest you. They can also help you to identify the things you absolutely don’t want to do, which is equally useful.
Yes/No/Maybe lists can be particularly useful tools in negotiating kinky play or relationships. If you and your partner or prospective partner complete the same list, you can then compare your results to find out where your interests overlap.
Erotic content such as ethical porn, written erotica, and audio erotica can be great ways to explore your interest in kink, whether you consume it alone or with a partner. If you consume a wide array of content you might even discover new things that interest you!
Remember: porn and erotica are entertainment, not instruction. They can help you to understand your kinks, but they are not a blueprint for how to do it in real life. Finding something hot in fiction also doesn’t mean you need to do it in real life. If you have a fantasy that you’d prefer stayed a fantasy, that is completely valid.
Get Involved in Your Local Kink Community
Wherever you are in your personal kink journey, there are so many great reasons to seek out your local community.
Firstly, you’ll make friends. Kinky friends can be utterly invaluable, particularly when you’re new and exploring. It’s considered poor etiquette to treat kink spaces as your personal cruising grounds, but if you’re looking for a partner or play partner then making authentic connections and building a solid reputation in the kinky community is a great place to start.
Being active in your local community is the best way to find out about events, get vetted, and get invited to awesome play parties!
You’ll also learn a lot. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about kinksters in my 16 years “on the scene” it’s that we’re fucking nerds. Want to enthuse about your favourite kinky thing? Desperate to show off your gorgeous new custom flogger or eager to learn how to tie someone up safely? The kink community is where you can make the kinds of friends who will relish these interactions.
If you have a partner or partners, talking about your fantasies can help you both/all to learn more about your kinks. Talking about fantasies can be a safe way to ease into trying them out. It can also be a hot precursor to sex.
Want to talk about your kinks but don’t have a partner to do it with? Try joining some discussion groups for your interests on Fetlife or paying a professional phone sex/cyber sex provider to engage in some dirty talk with you.
Try Things Out
Sometimes there’s no substitute for just trying something to see if you like it. If you think you might be into a particular kink, why not grab a consenting partner and give it a go? (You can also explore many elements of BDSM alone, by the way, but that’s a subject for another post!)
Do your research beforehand so you know how to stay safe. Establish a safeword or safe signal. Discuss desires, hard and soft limits, and boundaries. Go as slowly as you need to. Most importantly, check in regularly and communicate with your partner or partners at every stage. Grab a beginners’ bondage kit to start trying things out without spending a fortune.
And remember: kink and BDSM is a journey. You don’t need to have all the answers now or ever. Evolving, growing, changing, and reevaluating is part of the deal and part of the fun. Let the adventure take you where it will!
This post was kindly sponsored by Fetish.com and their BDSM test! All views and writing are, as always, mine.
Did you see that Netflix series How to Build a Sex Room? Like millions of other kinksters, I watched it and it got me thinking about what my own “sex room” might look like. In a world where I had a much bigger house than I do and an unlimited interior design budget, one of the first things I’d do would be to construct a badass playroom or home dungeon. And of course, from a bondage bed and spanking bench to suspension points and toy storage solutions, I’ve put a lot of thought into this concept and what I’d want to include.
It goes without saying that you don’t need tonnes of amazing kit to do BDSM. Your first and best tool in constructing scenes is your imagination. But one of the reasons I enjoy going to clubs and public play spaces is to use the kit I don’t have access to at home. I suspect the same is true for a lot of kinksters who play at clubs, dungeons and parties.
So just for fun, let’s do a little kink-meets-interior-design. If I could build my dream home dungeon, what would I put in it?
Suspension Points
Suspension points are absolutely essential if you want to do any kind of shibari or bondage that includes someone coming off the ground. You can get portable suspension frames (I actually have one in bits in my spare room right now!) but properly ceiling-mounted hard points are safer, more space-efficient, and less effort to set up.
Suspension points (AKA hard points) aren’t just for rope, either. You can also use them for other things, such as mounting a sex swing.
Speaking of which…
A Sex Swing
Sex swings are so versatile. They allow you to get into all kinds of positions safely and comfortably that would not otherwise be possible. They’re great for trying out different positions for penetrative sex (either with a bio-cock or a strap-on) but you can also use them for oral sex, kink scenarios, and more.
I actually own a door-mounted sex swing, but it has never come out of its packaging for the simple reason that I do not trust the structural integrity of my very old house’s doors that much. It feels like a recipe for injury. So a proper sex swing that I could mount on safe, load-rated hard points would be amazing.
The awesome thing about bondage beds is they’re not just one thing. Despite the name, a bondage bed can also be a table or flat surface, a restraint rack, an alternative to a St Andrews cross for standing impact play, and much more. You can even use it in conjunction with other items of dungeon furniture to create just about anything your kinky heart desires. For example, why not add a toy mount or a wand harness, which can hold a toy in place against the bottom’s body while keeping the top’s hands free to do other things?
The possibilities are limited only by your imagination, your and your partner’s boundaries, and the laws of physics. A good bondage bed will also be able to accommodate all body types, no matter your size or weight.
I’d love a customisable bondage bed for my home dungeon. I think I’d really enjoy getting cuffed to it for a flogging, or using it with the toy mount for edging and denial scenes. Given the size, it would also be ideal for group scenes. I think it would be super fun to cuff two submissives to it in a face to face position, making them each watch what’s happening to the other one. Exhibitionism, voyeurism, anticipation, and a little light fear play all in one… fun, no?
A Spanking Bench
The humble spanking bench always seems to be one of the most-used bits of kit whenever I go to a dungeon or play party. A spanking bench allows the bottom to hold a bent-over position for impact play more easily. It can help the bottom to stay comfortable and prevent them moving around too much, give the top a clear spot to aim for, and enhance feelings of vulnerability and humiliation if you’re into that.
My ideal spanking bench would be one of those lovely wooden, leather-padded ones that comes with built-in restraints for the wrists, ankles, and upper body.
A Bondage Wheel
One of my favourite local dungeons has one of these, and I absolutely love it. It’s a padded, wall-mounted wheel with restraints to strap a person to in an upright position. You can then tilt it in any direction, or even spin it all the way around.
Bondage wheels are fun for all kinds of reasons. You can immobilise your partner and move them around at will to try out different activities or reach different parts of their body. If disorientation is something you like to play with, combining a bondage wheel with sensory deprivation play can create a very intense experience.
They’re also a fun way to experiment with inversion (being upside down) in a way that you can get out of in seconds if you need to.
Wall-Mounted Toy Storage
When designing the perfect kinky play space, practicality is at least as important as aesthetics. To that end, I’d make use of wall-mounted toy storage solutions.
I have to credit sex and mental health writer JoEllen Notte for the genius idea of using a wall-mounted wine rack to store wand vibrators. I’d love to display my wands this way in my hypothetical home dungeon! (JoEllen is also the person who gave me the idea of repurposing door-hanging shoe holders with multiple pockets, which I now use to store both my sex toys and my hair and beauty products!)
I’d also love to have some beautiful wooden or metal hooks on the walls to store my floggers, paddles, and other large impact toys as well as coils of rope and cuff sets.
Erotic Art & Decor
I have a growing collection of erotic art in my office and bedroom, from shibari-themed embroidery to a sapphic BDSM print to an incense holder shaped like a vulva. I’d love to expand this collection a lot more, and I feel like my home dungeon would be the perfect place to show this off. My dream would be to invest in commissioning my favourite kinky and sex-positive artists to create some custom work for the space.
As far as colour schemes, I’m thinking dark wood furniture and splashes of dark plum purple and rich teal green. Less “red room of pain” and more “high-end hotel suite… but make it kinky.”
Aftercare Corner
Aftercare is one of the most crucial parts of a good kink scene. Good aftercare helps the players to ground, regroup, and connect to each other again as equal humans after intense play. My dungeon would have a cosy aftercare corner with a comfortable sofa, warm blankets, and maybe a mini-fridge well stocked with water and snacks for a post-play pick-me-up.
What would you want in your home dungeon?
FYI: this post was sponsored. All views and writing are, as always, my own.
It’s that time of year again when I do a day-by-day unboxing of the Lovehoney Advent Calendar for couples! Lovehoney UK is offering three advent calendars this year: a 12-day version and a 24-day version in partnership with Womanizer, as well as the Amorana Deluxe 24-day calendar which contains over £1100 worth of products. In the US, the 24-day version is the only one currently available.
I received the Lovehoney x Womanizer 24-day advent calendar. Straight away, I will say that I like the presentation of this Lovehoney advent calendar much more than previousiterations. The products are packaged in little individually labelled cardboard boxes in festive red and gold, rather than the tear-off doors that start to look a little scruffy when you’re a few days in. There’s also no plastic inner tray, cutting down on single-use plastic to make the whole thing more eco-friendly.
For the next 24 days, I’ll open one door each day and tell you a little about the item inside in a mini review with product info, pros and cons.
Without further ado, let’s dive into Day 1, shall we?
Day #1: Rechargeable Bullet Vibrator
Like previous iterations of the Lovehoney Advent Calendar, this one begins with a rechargeable bullet vibrator. This time, it’s a pretty rose gold colour with black button and Lovehoney insignia.
Light and compact – ideal for sliding between bodies during partnered sex or throwing into your bag for a sexy date
Surprisingly decent level of power for its size and price-point, and the hard plastic transmits the vibrations well
Versatile – designed for clits but great for penises, balls, nipples, and all kinds of other erogenous zones too (don’t use it anally, though, as it doesn’t have a suitable base)
Cons
Unlike many Lovehoney toys, it does not arrive with any charge so you’ll need to plug it in before you use it. This can ruin the mood if you’re aiming for an “unbox and use straight away” vibe.
A little more buzzy than I would prefer
Single button interface is kind of annoying when there are so many settings
Verdict
Once again, a solid basic bullet vibrator to kick things off. I would prefer it to be a bit more rumbly, but for the size and price-point it’s decent.
Day #2: Lube and Toy Wipes
Door #2 contains two items: a 60ml tube of Womanizer water-based lubricant and a packet of 10 Lovehoney toy cleaning wipes.
Pros
The biodegradable wipes are eco-friendly
The handy travel sizes are ideal for taking with you on a date or weekend away
Both products are compatible with all toy materials including silicone
The lube has a nice, fairly thin and runny consistency that flows and spreads well
The lube is virtually scent-free and flavourless
Cons
The lube contains glycerin as the second ingredient. Experts believe that glycerin can damage the vagina’s mucus membranes and raise the osmolality of a lube, increasing the risk of irritation or even infection. Claims that glycerin contributes to yeast infections are somewhat controversial and hotly debated. However, experts at Stanford OB/GYN and the Cleveland Clinic believe there is a risk. Personally, I avoid glycerin-containing lubes for the sake of my vaginal health. They also tend to have an unpleasant sticky or tacky feeling after a while.
The toy wipes will clean your toy and should not be taken as a substitute for properly sterilizing it, especially if you are sharing it with a partner or partners.
Verdict
I like this combination of two miniature products together, but I would like to see the lube swapped out with one that doesn’t contain glycerin.
Day #3: Silicone Textured Dildo
Today’s box revealed a bright red silicone dildo with a curved shaft, gentle rippling texture on the underside, and slightly pronounced head. It also has a suction cup base and a hollow space where you can insert the bullet vibrator from Day 1.
Product Info
Material: Silicone
Colour: Scarlet red
Body safe? Yes, silicone is body-safe and non-porous
Waterproof: Yes, there is no motor and the material is non-porous so you can safely use this toy in water
Size: 6″ length, 1.2″ diameter at widest point
Speeds/patterns: N/A
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
Cleaning: Sterile wipe, warm water and antibacterial soap, or boiling
Lovely curve, ideal for targeted G-spot or prostate stimulation
Large base makes the toy anal safe
Works with or without the bullet vibe from Day 1 (or any suitably sized bullet in your collection)
Texturing adds additional internal stimulation
Cons
Bullet vibe has a tendency to get stuck and be hard to remove (pro tip: lube it first!)
Base is too small for the toy to be harness-compatible
Verdict
A great basic textured dildo! These kits are really aimed at people who are newer to toys/sexual exploration, and this item’s thoughtful design and small-ish size make it ideal for a first dildo. I would like to see a slightly larger base to make it harness-compatible, though.
Day #4: TPE Penis Stroker
Day 4’s box contains a TPE penis stroker, complete with a slot along the side to add the bullet vibrator from Day 1 (or any other bullet in your collection) if you want to.
Body safe? Ish. TPE is generally non-toxic but it is porous, which means it will harbour bacteria and cannot be fully sterilised. Don’t share it and don’t expect it to last forever. I recommend upgrading to a silicone stroker when you can.
Waterproof: Yes, you can use this toy in water safely, though it may damage the material more quickly.
Size: 4″ length but stretchy
Speeds/patterns: N/A
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
Cleaning: Warm water and antibacterial soap. Dusting the toy with a little cornstarch after cleaning and drying may help to extend its life.
A decent introduction to strokers if you’ve never used one before
Ability to use with the bullet vibrator from Day 1, transforming it into a vibrating stroker
Very stretchy to accommodate most penis sizes
Nice internal texturing that hugs and stimulates the entire shaft of your penis
Cons
Weird powdery texture that feels horrible on my hands
Material cannot be fully sterilised
Unlikely to last long
Verdict
It’s fine for what it is, but I would much prefer it were made of a non-porous material like silicone. Again: if you like the sensation, upgrade to a silicone stroker for a toy that will last you a lifetime and be far more hygienic.
Day #5: Kink Blindfold
Sensory deprivation can be a lot of fun to play with. By taking away one or more of the senses (such as sight) you heighten the others (such as touch). It can also be a great way to enhance anticipation, play with power and control, or otherwise explore whatever aspects of kink and BDSM appeal to you.
Today’s advent calendar box contains a kink blindfold. Made of polyester and with a pretty black and rose gold pattern, this blindfold measures 7″ across and 2.5″ top to bottom. A similar item retails for £7.99 if bought separately.
Pros
Stretchy elastic means the blindfold will fit most users
Plushy padded backing is comfortable to wear
Pretty black and rose gold design
Doubles as a sleep mask (I have several of these now and as a seasoned kinkster I rarely use them for BDSM as I have better blindfolds, but I always take one with me when I travel to help me sleep)
Cons
Not quite big enough – it blocks most of the light effectively but I can still see around the edges a bit if I keep my eyes open
Cheap fabric is starting to pull at the edges and look less attractive after just a few wears
I’m not sure how well it would survive washing
Verdict
A perfectly serviceable basic blindfold if you just want to play but aren’t looking for complete sight deprivation. It would be better if it was slightly wider. If you enjoy playing with this, then it’s easy to upgrade to a better kink blindfold that will last you longer and block more of your vision.
Day #6: Crystal Butt Plug
Box #6 contains an aluminium metal butt plug with a sparkly red crystal-look base.
Product Info
Material: Aluminium
Colour: Rose gold body with a red gem base
Body safe? Generally yes; aluminium is a non-toxic and non-porous metal that is safe for use in sex toys. However, some aluminium can contain traces of nickel so I’d be very cautious if you are allergic.
Waterproof: Yes, you can use this toy in water with no issues.
Size: 3″ in total length, 1.1″ in diameter at widest insertable point
Cleaning: Sterile wipe, 10% bleach solution, or warm water and antibacterial soap. I wouldn’t boil this one or put it in the dishwasher as it might damage the glue holding the gem in place.
RRP if bought as a single item:This similar toy retails for £22.99
Pros
Surprisingly light – aluminium is a lot lighter than stainless steel, making it a more accessible entry point for metal toys
The rose gold body and red crystal colour scheme is really pretty
Great for temperature play – just pop it in the fridge or run it under some warm (not hot) water right before use
Small size likely to make it suitable for more users
Cons
In general, I think a metal anal toy in a set aimed at beginners is a bold choice. I might have gone for silicone instead.
The firm rounded base might dig in after you’ve been wearing it for a while and could be uncomfortable
Verdict
A nice little metal plug; personally I would have gone for silicone if I were designing this kit, but as entry-level metal anal toys go this is a decent one. The pretty colour and sparkly crystal make it super cute, too.
Day #7: Vanilla Massage Oil
Day 7’s box contains a 30ml bottle of Lovehoney’s vanilla massage oil. Massage can be a great precursor to sex, a way to connect intimately and show love and affection to a partner without getting your genitals involved, or a form of aftercare. For those in kinky dynamics, it can also be a fun form of service!
Product Info
This vanilla massage oil contains just four ingredients:
Ethylhexyl palmite: A common and safe emollient and carrying agent which can soften and smooth the skin.
Caprylic/capric triglyceride: Derived from coconut oil and glycerine, this antioxidant also smooths the skin and helps to bind other ingredients. It is safe for topical use unless you have a coconut oil allergy.
Isopropyl myristate: An emollient with low viscosity which softens, smooths, and moisturises the skin and is safe and beneficial for most users. It may cause skin irritation in a small minority of people, usually those with existing skin conditions.
Parfum (aroma): This is a weird one. “Parfum” isn’t actually an ingredient but a concoction that could contain any of over 3000 ingredients designed to make a product smell good. Some people recommend avoiding products with this mystery mix, others say it’s probably fine as long as you don’t have an allergy or sensitivity. Personally I don’t worry about it too much for products for occasional topical use (such as massage oils), but your risk tolerance may vary.
This oil is also sold separately under Lovehoney’s Fifty Shades of Grey branded products and retails for £11.99 for 30ml.
Pros
Nice vanilla smell, distinctive but not overpowering or too “chemically”
Glides on smoothly and has a pleasant skin feel
Cons
Dries out quickly and doesn’t last particularly well, meaning you might need to reapply it regularly
May be unsuitable for those with fragrance sensitivities or certain skin allergies
Leaves a slight oily feeling on my hands after use
Verdict
Not my favourite massage oil, but it’s fine. I wouldn’t likely buy this again as there are other massage products I like a lot more.
Day #8: Wrist Restraints
Today’s box contains a pair of velcro-shut wrist cuffs with plastic hardware. The cuffs are black, and the hardware is rose gold, matching various other items in this set. I’ll say this for Lovehoney and Womanizer, they have their aesthetic cohesion down.
Pros
I will say straight away that these are a huge step up from the 2021 calendar’s “wrist restraints” (glorified ribbons and frankly pretty dangerous) and from 2022’s uncomfortable rough cuffs. These ones are made of a soft material that feels nice against the skin.
Other pros include:
Velcro fastenings come undone in seconds, enhancing safety and making them beginner-friendly
Very adjustable so will fit just about anyone
Attached clips allow you to cuff someone’s hands together or clip them to something else
Cons
Clips are tiny, so what you can fasten them to is pretty limited
Not particularly strong – the hardware feels like it would break if you pulled against them too hard
When you fasten them tighter, there’s nowhere for the spare velcro to be tucked so it just sort of… dangles
Verdict
You might be sending a theme in my overall impression of this kit: these cuffs aren’t amazing, but they’re fine. If you want to play with light bedroom bondage or try out getting restrained for the first time, they’re ideal. If you’re looking for something a bit more heavy-duty, though, you’ll probably want to upgrade to leather cuffs (or vegan equivalent) or go to a dedicated kink gear maker.
Day #9: We-Vibe Sync Lite
The We-Vibe Sync Light is a wearable vibrator designed to be inserted into the vagina during penetrative sex, with an external arm that provides clitoral stimulation. Of course, as always, there are lots of different ways to use toys and the suggested way is just one of them!
Product Info
Material: Silicone
Colour: Black
Body safe? Yes
Waterproof: No – toy is IPX-4 splashproof but should not be submerged
Middling power vibrations – they’re not knock-your-socks-off, but they’re decent
Flexible middle between the two arms allows you to position the toy in whatever way is most comfortable for your body
App controls! I did not expect to find an app-controlled toy in this kit but I am very pleasantly surprised. We-Vibe’s app is free from the Android or iOS stores and allows you to connect at close range or remotely from anywhere in the world.
Cons
No remote control, which is a downside if you don’t want to use the app
Single button interface on the body of the toy is kind of annoying
Not waterproof
In my experience, these toys don’t generally stay in place well during partnered sex without someone holding them in position
Verdict
This is a really impressive addition to the kit! These types of toys are normally seriously pricey, so this is a great introduction for those who are curious about trying one. The app controls are also a really nice extra, particularly for couples who want to connect sexually over long distance.
Day #10: Silicone Cock Ring
Today’s item is a basic silicone thick cock ring. Cock rings are worn around the base of the penis, restricting blood flow outwards to help the wearer maintain a stronger erection for longer. Some also say they heighten sensation and intensify orgasm.
According to Healthline, cock rings are safe for the vast majority of wearers as long as you listen to your body, wear a ring of a suitable size, and follow some basic precautions, such as using lube and not leaving the ring on for more than 30 minutes at a time.
Product Info
Material: Silicone
Colour: Black
Body safe? Yes – silicone is non-porous and non-toxic.
Waterproof: Yes, this toy is non-porous and has no motor so can safely be used in water
Size: 1.5″ diameter but stretchy
Speeds/patterns: N/A
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
Cleaning: Boiling, a 10% bleach solution, a sterile wipe, or warm water and antibacterial soap
May be uncomfortably tight on those with very girthy penises
Verdict
Not much more to say on this one – a great basic cock ring that is also body-safe and should be durable and long-lasting.
Day #11: Spanking Paddle
Today’s item is a mini spanking paddle with a pretty black and rose gold design matching other items in the kit. It’s made of silky satin on one side and faux leather on the other, and has a ribbon wrist loop. It measures 9″ in total length.
Very safe as an intro toy for impact play beginners – you’re very unlikely to do anyone real damage with this
Slightly different sensation from each of the two sides (the leather side is a little more stingy)
Impressive slappy noise which is hot to some people
Cons
Unlikely to satisfy anyone who enjoys more than very mild pain
Loud noise may be problematic if you have to keep your play discreet
Not particularly robust, will probably fall apart after a bit
Verdict
This is a perfectly okay spanking paddle for total beginners. It’s gentle enough to be safe and non-threatening, and might be a decent way to figure out if impact play is something you enjoy. It’s unlikely to satisfy serious BDSM enthusiasts but honestly, serious BDSM enthusiasts aren’t the target market for this kit anyway.
Today it’s literally the card game “Snap” but as a sex position card game. Is the idea that you play the game and then when you get a “snap”, you have to have sex in that position? Because YKINMKBYKIOK and all, but that doesn’t sound sexy to me.
Also, they should really rename this as “Sex Position Card Game For Very Athletic Straight People.” Because seriously, look at them. They all assume, to a greater or lesser extent, a cisgender man and woman having penetrative vaginal sex. Some of them are fine, if fairly generic. Some are potentially doable, if you’re very fit, like “The Wheelbarrow”:
Others are… well, this:
Stop it, Lovehoney. You’re being silly now.
Pros
Potentially a fun, goofy and low-pressure way into exploring new positions, I guess?
Calls to mind this scene from The Bold Type in which our three bestie protagonists test out a new sex position for Scarlet Magazine.
Some of these, at least, could potentially work for strap-on sex or anal sex (at least if you made some minor adjustments) as well as vaginal sex.
Cons
A lot of these are just fairly standard positions that most people who have penetrative sex likely already have in their repertoire.
The others are, as we have identified above, anything from “improbable if you’re not an athlete” to “physically im-fucking-possible.”
Extremely cishetero and gendered
Verdict
You might get a little inspiration from this, or at the very least you’ll have a laugh trying out some of the more challenging positions. Overall, though, I don’t know why we’re still pretending that contorting yourself into all kinds of weird shapes is superior to or hotter than good old missionary, doggy style, or over-the-edge-of-the-bed fucking.
Day #13: G-Spot/P-Spot Massager
Today’s product is a G-Spot/P-Spot Massager. In other words, a penetrative toy that can be used to stimulate either the G-spot or the prostate. It has an optional slot to insert a bullet vibrator such as the one from Day 1.
Product Info
Material: Silicone
Colour: Black
Body safe? Yes
Waterproof: Yes (though if you’re using a vibrator with it, make sure that’s waterproof too!)
Size: 4″ insertable length, 1.4″ diameter at widest point
Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, boiling, or gentle antibacterial soap and water
RRP if bought as a single item: N/A – not available
Pros
Suitable and safe for both vaginal and anal use
Can be used with or without a vibrator
Very flexible, which can help with insertion and comfortable positioning
Bulbed head for precision stimulation of the G-spot or prostate
Narrow neck allows it to sit comfortably once inserted
Beginner-friendly size
Cons
None that I can see!
Verdict
This is a lovely item and a great inclusion in the kit. It’s good to see items that are suitable for people regardless of their body or genital type, the shape and curve are excellent, and the size isn’t too intimidating for those who are new to anal play.
Day #14: Menthol Pleasure Balm
Today’s item is a 7g tin of Lovehoney’s menthol pleasure balm. This item isn’t sold separately in this form but it’s pretty similar to the Bliss Orgasm Balm, which I love and use regularly.
Product Info
In a nutshell, pleasure balm or orgasm balm is designed to be applied to the external genitals, especially the clitoris. The ingredients provide a tingling sensation and may encourage blood flow, promoting greater sensitivity.
The Menthol Pleasure Balm contains a pretty long list of ingredients, but most of them give me no cause for concern. It does contain propylparaben, and some people like to avoid parabens entirely for understandable reasons. However, according to a report by the Scientific Committee on Consumer Safety, “the SCCS has concluded that propylparaben is safe when used as a preservative in cosmetic products up to a maximum concentration of 0.14%.” I’m not a scientist, of course, but I would conclude from this data that the tiny amount in this product is unlikely to do you any harm.
Unfortunately this balm contains beeswax, so it is not vegan.
Pros
7g doesn’t sound like a very big tin, but you really don’t need a lot to get the effects so you’ll get a good few uses out of this
Genuinely works! I have had several tins of this stuff over the years and I love it. It really does enhance sensitivity (it’s not a magic orgasm spell, though, so keep your expectations realistic!)
Some of the plant-based oils and other ingredients may have beneficial properties for skin
Cons
Not vegan due to beeswax
Oily consistency can make clean-up a bit annoying
Strong minty scent may be unpleasant to some people
Verdict
I still really like this stuff, though I think personally I’ll be sticking to the vegan, paraben-free version.
Day #15: Plastic Massager
Today’s item is a handheld plastic massager. It’s red and sparkly, and has a central handle and then four arms each with a spherical bulb on the end to get deep into all those muscles and knots. On its own, this item retails for £5.99.
Pros
Light weight and ergonomic design make it comfortable to hold and use
Great way to give a deeper massage, especially if your hands or wrists get tired or sore
Flexible options – use one, two, or all four ends at once for different sensations
Really good for getting properly into sore muscles!
Basically zero maintenance – just wash off excess massage oil after use and you’re good to go
Cons
Because it’s hard plastic, you need to be a little bit careful – you could possibly hurt someone if you press too hard. We’re not talking “serious injury” here, but maybe “nasty bruise.”
Verdict
I really like this one. And it’s sparkly, which never hurts my opinion of a product!
Day #16: Micro Wand Vibrator
Today’s product is a micro wand vibrator. Look how tiny it is!
Product Info
Material: Plastic body. I thought the head material was probably silicone but wasn’t 100% sure, so I flame-tested it and based on what I know about deciphering flame test results I think I’m correct
Colour: Black
Body safe? Yes, assuming it is indeed silicone
Waterproof: No
Size: 4.5″ in total length
Speeds/patterns: 3 speeds, 7 patterns
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
Cleaning: Wipe the head with a body-safe sterile wipe (do not submerge this toy in water)
Easy user interface and satisfyingly clicky buttons
Cons
Requires batteries, which are not included (2 x AAA)
Not waterproof
Vibrations not particularly powerful
Buzzy as fuck
Verdict
I think people see “wand vibrator” and assume that it’s going to be powerful. But this isn’t a wand in any meaningful sense. This is a wand. This tiny little thing, though, is just a crappy vibrator with a weak and buzzy motor designed to look like a micro version of a wand.
I already have something very similar from a previous calendar, and it’s often within reach because it does wonders for my sore neck when I’ve been sitting at the computer for too long. Partners have also really enjoyed having it used on them.
Day #17: Dice Sex Game
Today’s box contains a simple dice sex game. One dice includes pictures of items from the calendar (stroker, bullet vibe, paddle, mini wand, dildo, and massager). The other contains timeframes ranging from 1 minute to 15 minutes, plus a “free” option.
Pros
Can be a fun, low-pressure way into exploring with a partner if you are new and nervous about using toys or experimenting sexually
You can use the dice in different ways. I’m immediately thinking of a game where you roll the “implement” die three times and then have to come up with a quick scene that incorporates all three elements.
Cons
Things can end up feeling unbalanced if you follow the game too rigidly. If one person gets 15 minutes of something then the other rolls one minute, it’s probably not going to feel very mutual. Of course, you can get around this by creating “house rules” or just ensuring everyone gets roughly equal time (or whatever they want/need) even if you’re switching between different activities.
Verdict
Not really my thing, but perfectly fine for its intended audience.
Day #18: Ankle Restraints
Remember those velcro-fastening wrist cuffs from Day 8? Well, today’s box containd the matching set of ankle restraints. These, too, are black with rose gold hardware and come with a clip to fasten them together.
Pros
Like the wrist cuffs, they’re a huge step up from the rough nylon cuffs and those unsafe ribbon things from previous years
Soft and comfy to wear
Safe and beginner-friendly as you can unfasten them in a second
Very adjustable sizing
Cons
The clips are tiny and not very strong
Annoying dangling velcro strap when they’re on
Mostly, I’m just annoyed that these were a separate item. All four cuffs should have been in the same box as they’re clearly a set.
Verdict
Exactly like the other half of this matching set (sensing a pattern here?) these are far from amazing, but they’re fine. They do the job if all you want to do is experiment with light bondage. If you find you enjoy it, you can always splash out on some properly made kink ankle cuffs later on.
Day #19: Kegel Balls
Day 19’s box contains a set of kegel balls, AKA ben-wa balls. Kegel balls are interesting, because there are a lot of lofty claims out there about them. They’ll solve incontinence! They’ll make your orgasms better! They might even make it easier to orgasm if you struggle!
Is any of this true?
Eh. Maybe. Check out my past posts on kegel balls and kegel exercisers, especially this one, to learn more about what the current research does and does not say.
In this post I will be approaching kegel balls solely as a sex toy designed for pleasure, not as any sort of health or wellness device.
Product Info
Material: Silicone
Colour: Red balls with black casing
Body safe? Yes
Waterproof: Yes
Size: 3″ insertable length, 3.5″ tail, 1.1″ diameter across each ball
Speeds/patterns: N/A
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
Cleaning: Boiling is best as this will kill all bacteria even in hard-to-reach places
RRP if bought as a single item:This similar set retails for £12.99
Pros
Small enough for beginners
Long and strong silicone cord for easy removal
Removeable sling makes cleaning easy
Cons
None that I can find – these are great.
Verdict
An ideal introduction to kegel balls for anyone who has never tried them before.
Day #20: Rabbit Cock Ring
Day 20’s box contains a silicone cock ring with rabbit ears. This can be used with the bullet vibrator from Day 1, or on its own. When combined with the bullet vibrator, the ears can provide clitoral stimulation to the receptive partner during penetrative sex as well as stimulating the wearer. On its own, it still gives you all the benefits of using a cock ring.
Product Info
Material: Silicone
Colour: Black
Body safe? Yes
Waterproof: Yes
Size: 1.5″ ring diameter, 1″ ears
Speeds/patterns: N/A
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube
Cleaning: Boiling, soap and water, or a 10% bleach solution
RRP if bought as a single item: Not available but this similar item retails for £24.99
Pros
Versatile toy suitable for use during masturbation or partnered sex, and with or without a vibrator
Adds clitoral stimulation, which a large majority of vulva-owners need to orgasm and which is not always forthcoming during p-in-v sex
Wide band for comfortable fit
Stretchy to accommodate different sizes
Cons
May not fit people with very girthy penises comfortably
Verdict
Realistically, this toy is not something I’m likely to use. My experience has been that vibrating cock rings during penetrative sex don’t tend to do much for me as the stimulation they provide isn’t consistent enough. But everyone’s different and it’s a perfectly fine item, just not really for me.
Day #21: Beginner Nipple Clamps
Day 21’s box contains a pair of nipple clamps. They’re made of rose gold plastic, with a little decorative lightning bolt charm and red silicone tips. The slider design allows you to loosen or tighten them as desired.
They’re cute; I like the colour and the lightning charm is a fun touch
Easy to put on and take off quickly
Adjustable to fit different nipple sizes and tightness preferences
Very gentle, which makes them suitable beginner nipple clamps
Cons
That beginner-friendly gentleness means they’re unlikely to be enough for wearers who prefer any significant pressure or intensity
Won’t fit people with larger nipples
The slider starts to rub off the coloured plating after a few uses
They don’t stay on particularly well and fall off at the slightest tug
Verdict
These are fine if you’re just after a pair of purely decorative nipple clamps or want to try something very gentle for your first time. However, they’re neither particularly functional nor particularly durable for anything more than that. If you like them or want to experiment more with nipple clamps, get a more robust pair of adjustable clamps or try clover clamps.
Day #22: Finger Vibe Sleeve
Box 22 contains a finger vibe sleeve. There’s a space to insert a bullet vibrator (such as the bullet vibe from Day 1, or any other bullet in your collection that fits) and a loop for your finger.
Product Info
Material: Silicone
Colour: Red
Body safe? Yes
Waterproof: Yes (but the bullet vibrator you use with it may or may not be, so check first!)
Size: 2.5″ long sleeve for bullet, 0.5″ diameter finger loop
Speeds/patterns: N/A
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube
Cleaning: Boiling, soap and water, or a 10% bleach solution
Pairs with the bullet vibrator from Day 1, allowing yet another way to use it
Offers a fun new way to explore fingering and hand sex, which I believe are wildly underrated sex acts and should be explored far more
Gentle texturing on the underside offers additional clitoral stimulation
Can reduce the physical effort of the giving partner during hand sex, which is useful if you suffer from pain or fatigue in your hands
Cons
The finger loop is tiny! It was snug on me, and I have small hands. Someone with larger hands doesn’t stand a chance using this
If your bullet vibrator isn’t super powerful, the silicone dampens the vibrations
Texturing could do with being a bit more pronounced
Verdict
This is a really nice addition to the kit at least in theory. However, it feels to me like the design was a bit rushed and basic things – is the finger loop large/stretchy enough to be comfortable, is the texturing pronounced enough to be felt by most users? – were missed.
Day #23: Under-Mattress Restraints
Today’s item is a set of under-mattress restraints with clips to attach cuffs at each corner. These four-way restraints are designed to fit under your mattress, which then anchors them in place. Use in conjunction with the wrist cuffs from Day 8 and the ankle cuffs from Day 18 for a full set of restraints.
Adjustable to use with all bed sizes, including my fabulous super-king
Great way to try bedroom bondage if you want to tie someone to the bed but don’t have a metal bed frame or other suitable hard points.
Easy to tuck them out of sight quickly if you need to without dismantling the whole set-up
Strong and sturdy material
Safe and easy introduction to bondage
Pairs with the cuffs in this set or, if you prefer, you can upgrade to better cuffs and continue using the restraint kit
Cons
I feel like the under-mattress restraints and pairs of cuffs should have been ONE item in the advent calendar, not three. Otherwise, no complaints.
Verdict
Overall, this is a great addition for the second-last day of the advent kit. I’m also pleasantly surprised to learn they will work with my giant bad, having assumed they wouldn’t. For people who are brand new to playing with bondage and restraint, they’re a safe and accessible place to start.
Day #24: Womanizer Liberty 2
Day 24’s box contains the second of this kit’s two premium products (the first being the We-Vibe Sync Lite from Day 9!) Namely, the Womanizer Liberty 2, a petite clitoral suction stimulator in a neat little travel case.
Product Info
Material: Plastic body and case, silicone nozzle
Colour: Black
Body safe? Yes
Waterproof: Yes, IPX 7 waterproof
Size: 4.5″ total length
Speeds/patterns: 8 intensity levels
Lube-compatible: Water-based lube
Cleaning: Soap and water or a 10% bleach solution, or remove the nozzle and boil-sterilise the nozzle only
Petite size makes it light and comfortable to hold
Removeable nozzle is easy to clean
Quieter than comparable models at the highest speeds
Two-way controls
5 year warranty should anything go wrong
Cons
Buttons are not always as responsive as they could be – sometimes I have to press twice to get the speed to change
Verdict
Yes yes yes yes. This is an excellent product and a great note to finish on! Honestly, as long as you like at least a few of the other things at least somewhat, this toy kinda makes the value of the entire kit.
Phew. And we’re done! Will I do this again next year? Probably! Until then, I’ll return you to the regular C&K content you know and love.
The Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2024 (24 Day) retails for £149 at Lovehoney UK and $199 at Lovehoney US, and contains £457/$530 worth of products! Move fast if you want one – these usually sell out by mid November.Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the this set to review. All views are mine (with occasional input from Mr C&K!) Affiliate links appear in this post.
One of the coolest things about being a sex writer is that I get to discover new things I’m into that I would never have thought to try. Another super cool thing about it? I get to discover new things I’m not into that I would never have thought to try. This week I have learned that I am not into ovipositor toys, or egg-laying dildos.
This revelation isn’t entirely surprising to me, to be fair. I can’t say the idea, in itself, is ever something that has sparked fantasies or even that I have thought about very much at all. But, when Nothosaur asked me if I would test out one of their ovipositor dildos and write about it, I was curious enough to give it a go. Naturally, being a huge musical theatre nerd, I had to pick the one called “Audrey II.”
What is an Ovipositor Toy and Why Are People Into Them?
In nature, an ovipositor is a tube-like organ that some animals use for laying eggs. In the world of sex toys, it’s a hollow dildo that “lays eggs” inside the user.
Ovipositation kinks often come along with impregnation fetishes, though they can also exist separately as their own thing. I’m far too legitimately afraid of pregnancy to eroticise it, personally, but it’s a super common kink. The reasons why people might be into ovipositation are many and varied. Some enjoy the physical sensation of having the eggs deposited inside them, or of “laying” them out again. For others, it’s a natural extension of a monster-fucking or alien-fucking fetish. Some connect it to consensual non-consent (CNC) fantasies, humiliation kinks, fear play, dehumanisation or animal roleplay kinks, and many more.
Ovipositor dildos have a hollow cavity through the middle into which users can insert eggs, which they can then pop out inside their vagina or anus.
Important Things to Know About the Audrey II Ovipositor Toy
If you’re into the idea of fucking an alien plant tendril, then look no further. The Nothosaur Audrey II is a beautifully made and intricate ovipositor toy with an impressive level of detailing. It is made of body-safe matte silicone and the various ridges and bumps add not just aesthetic appeal but also additional internal stimulation in use. The standard green colourway with hints of red adds to the “scary alien plant” vibe, but you can also get it in your choice of custom colours if you prefer.
You can’t really use the Audrey II as a regular dildo without the eggs unless you’re into VERY soft and flexible toys. Due to the hollow interior, it’s ultra squishy to the point that it is hard to even insert. It has a suction cup base, though I’m not sure how much use this would be to anyone using the toy for its intended purpose.
You can order the Audrey II ovipositor toy with or without eggs, known at Nothosaur as OGGs and available in a range of sizes. You can also order OGGs separately if you decide you want to add them on later or if you want to add more to your collection. The eggs are genuinely super pretty and come in a range of random colourways.
Your other option is to make eggs yourself using the included molds. The Audrey II comes with 3 egg molds in different sizes. Nothosaur has also provided handy instructions on how to make eggs. In a nutshell, you’ll need gelatin powder, very hot water, a syringe, and your fridge or freezer. I did some research into this and the general consensus seems to be that gelatin is safe to use in the vagina or anus as long as you’re not allergic. Use plain gelatin with no sugars, dyes, or any other additives, as introducing these things into your body can disrupt your vaginal health and be a breeding ground for infection.
If you want to use the Audrey II ovipositor anally, it’s important to only use gelatin eggs which will dissolve inside you. Never, ever put the silicone eggs inside your butt. They could get lost or stuck, which can be dangerous. The gelatin will go all melty and goopy pretty quickly, so it’s best to allow some time for clean-up. Put a towel down if you don’t want to risk staining your sheets.
Inserting the eggs takes a little practice but is easy once you get the hang of it. You’ll need plenty of lubricant (water-based or oil-based is ideal) and to use the provided plastic booster to push the eggs up inside and through the toy.
The Audrey II’s squishiness helps to enable eggs to pass through the dildo more easily. Be careful where you’re squeezing, though. They can pop out of the bottom of the toy if you’re not careful.
Actually getting the eggs to come out took me a couple of attempts to get the hang of. It takes a little more pressure than you think it will. Pro tip: clean your hands if they’re covered in lube from setting things up, otherwise you’ll just end up with things slipping out of your hands and flying everywhere.
I ordered the small size Audrey II, which measures 7″ in total length and around 5.5″ in insertable length. Its 1.8″ diameter makes it comfortable to use and not too girthy.
Verdict
I have learned that this definitively isn’t my kink. But it’s a pretty common one, as I learned in the course of researching this post, so it might well be yours! And if so, this is an excellent product. The Audrey II ovipositor is thoughtfully designed and beautifully made. Nothosaur’s product presentation and customer service are both excellent, too. I received several fun extras with my toy, including a cute branded storage bag, some stickers, and a cock keyring.
I’ll just leave you with this, courtesy of my nesting partner Mr C&K:
Him: “Audrey II didn’t lay eggs.” Me: “No, it ate faces… I’m putting that in the review.”
The Audrey II ovipositor dildo starts from $75.99 for the smallest size. Larger sizes, custom colours, and adding silicone eggs will all increase the price. When you use my links and my code COFFEE at checkout, you can get 10% off your entire purchase.
Thanks to Nothosaur Toys for sending me this product to review and for sponsoring this post. All views, as always, are mine. Check out their full range of ovipositors and other fantasy dildos.
I’ve written for Total Chastity a couple of times before, and this time their team pitched me a guest post of their own! They decided to poll their customers on what “total chastity” means to them. The results are quite enlightening, so I’ll hand you over to them to tell you all about it!
Amy x
What Does “Total Chastity” Mean to You?
Running a male chastity[1] website gives us the opportunity to interact with a huge range of submissives, Dominants, and Mistresses. While we’re all here for similar reasons, each individual in the fetish community is different. Even our name, Total Chastity, invokes all kinds of ideas and fantasies for different people, so we thought it would be fun to ask the question:
“What does “total chastity” mean to you?”
Here are some of the responses we got.
[1] “Male chastity” is the term commonly used to refer to a person with a penis being locked up in a chastity cage. However, this is a bit of a misnomer as not everyone with a penis–or who enjoys this kink–is a man
“Total Chastity Means Being Locked 24/7”
Permanent chastity was one of the most common answers we got when we quizzed our customers. The idea of chastity totally taking over your life is a common one within the fetish, and many submissives aspire to reach this despite the difficulty for most people.
“Even when I was just getting started, being locked all the time was the goal. It’s harder than you think to pull off though. There’s always a day where you’re uncomfortable or don’t feel up to it. I’m still not there yet but I don’t feel like I’ll be doing “Total Chastity” until I am.”
While the idea of permanent chastity can be a tantalising carrot for many submissives, it’s not something you should dive straight into. We advise starting with small periods of time wearing the cage and increasing them gradually. Even if you need to take the cage off at night, but wear it throughout the day, you shouldn’t feel like a failure.
It’s also important to be aware of the safety implications of wearing a chastity cage long term. We like this piece by Dan Savage in which he consulted with a urologist on how to do chastity safely.
“Total Chastity Means Having a Mistress”
While we always encourage those who want to practise male chastity alone to do so, for some it’s never enough. Despite the majority of the experience being completely possible as a solo submissive, many of the responses we got from our customers stated that they felt they wouldn’t be doing “Total Chastity” until they find themselves someone to hold the keys and to truly submit to.
“I did my time on my own, but it never really clicked until I found Mistress. You can try all the neat tricks you want like giving the key to a friend or burying it in the garden, but you can always just go get it back. Once you’ve found someone to take that dominant role over you it really changes everything. To me that’s the step that takes it from just chastity to “total chastity”.”
Even though this point of view was fairly common amongst the chastity enthusiasts we spoke to, we always encourage those with an interest in chastity to give it a try even without a partner. It can help you explore the fetish, figure out which parts you like and dislike, and go into a partnered relationship more prepared with an idea of what you want to get out of it. There are also more and more products coming out to help support solo submissives such as app locking cages, and online keyholding services, which can give you an idea of what it’ll be like having a real Mistress, Master, or Dominant.
“Total Chastity Means More Than a Cage”
Anyone can put on a chastity cage. Anyone can wear one for hours or even days. But does that make them a chastity submissive? For many of our customers, the bit that comes after putting on the cage is what really defines “total chastity”.
“When I first started, I think I mind- gamed myself a bit. For some reason I thought once I’d bought a chastity device and put it on that would be it. Really though, it was only the beginning. Once the initial excitement wore off, reality started to set in. For me the things you do while you’re wearing the cage are so much more important than just the act of locking up your junk. Only once you start to live your life as a submissive do you truly start to experience “total chastity”.”
A lot of stores are only really in it to sell you a cage. Once they’ve made the sale, you’re left to figure out the rest on your own. Luckily there are plenty of resources online to help, including forums where you can talk to others who’ve gone through exactly the same process when they started out.
At Total Chastity, we want to be part of this process. That’s why we regularly post an array of chastity themed content that can help you not just with choosing and buying a cage, but what to do after you’ve put it on.
“Total Chastity Means Total Submission”
A slightly more philosophical answer that we got from some of our customers was focused on the submissive component of the chastity process. These answers were massively varied, but followed the same general theme that there was a moment during the experience where it truly felt that they were powerless and “became a true submissive”. For these individuals, that “moment” is what it means to experience “total chastity”.
“There wasn’t one specific thing that I can think of. It was more like I’d crossed a bridge and there was no going back. I’d gone through the motions for months and yeah, it was fun and interesting. But one day it just clicked. She was in control. My cock was hers. Nothing I said or did would change that. That was my “total chastity” moment.”
It’s difficult to pin down a specific thing that would give you this “moment”. All we can really do if you’re looking for it is to keep exploring and trying different aspects of chastity, experimenting and exploring to figure out what works for you.
“Total Chastity Means Total Chastity”
Hearing these points of view from our customers was a fascinating experienced which reaffirmed our own beliefs. Total Chastity isn’t about one specific thing. It’s the whole experience that matters, and it is deeply personal.
That’s why we aim to focus on providing as much of that experience as possible. From quality cages to in depth advice. From chatting to submissives and Dominants on social media to trying out as many cages as we can. Total Chastity is our mission, and we aim to deliver it to all who want to experience it–whatever that means to you.
When people are getting ready to attend their first kink party, one of the most frequency asked questions is “what the hell do I wear!?” What to wear to a play party can feel like a minefield, but it’s not as complicated as it seems. In this post I’ll dispel some common myths as well as share some kink party outfit ideas to get you inspired. I’ve also included some links to some of my favourite pieces and stores.
Check the Dress Code
Some parties and events have their own dresscode. These can be anything from very broad and general to highly specific. Events with very specific dress codes are generally those geared around a particular kink which relates in some way to the dress code – for example, clothed Dom/naked sub events or those for latex fetishists. Some may even have fun fancy dress themes.
Many events will simply state “fetishwear”, “make an effort”, “smart black minimum”, or “no jeans or trainers.” Within the dress code or general guidelines, you’re free to be as creative as you like.
Check out the Fetlife page for your chosen event, if they have one. You may see pictures that past attendees have shared of their outfits, which can provide some inspiration, or example pictures for what constitutes suitable attire.
What is “Fetishwear?”
Fetishwear is a pretty broad term. In short, though, it refers to anything out-of-the-box, provocative, sexualised, or in some way over-the-top or extreme. Certain fabrics, such as leather, latex, rubber, and PVC, are commonly seen in fetishwear.
Highly structured items such as corsets as well as revealing clothing such as lingerie may also be considered fetishwear. Certain types of detailing, such as straps, studs, or spikes, can add a fetishy vibe to your kink party outfit.
Kinky or sexualised accessories such as collars and cuffs, body harnesses, stockings, and extreme footwear can fall into this category, too.
Do I Have to Spend a Lot of Money?
Nope!
There are some kink events that have a reputation for being picky to the point of snobbish about the dress code, putting expectations on attendees that are financially prohibitive to many. I recommend avoiding those events unless spending hundreds of £/$ on an outfit is part of the fun for you.
For most kink events, there is no expectation that you spend a lot of money. In fact, you can likely get something suitable on sale or even put together an outfit from pieces you already own if money is a concern for you.
Do I Have to Show a Lot of Skin?
No!
Well, not usually. Again, there are a small number of events where this is expected as part of the event theme (such as clothed Dom/naked sub events.) As a general rule, though, there is no expectation to get naked or to show off any more of your body than you feel comfortable with.
You probably will see people naked or wearing very skimpy outfits. But you’ll also see people in full length dresses or skirts, trousers or suits, or outfits that are sexy but not revealing (for example, catsuits.)
In short, at the vast majority of kink events you can show as much or as little skin as you like. Some events do have restrictions on genital nudity due to venue licensing, so always check if you are planning a very skimpy outfit.
The Classics: Lingerie, Corsetry, Kilts, LBDs and More
There are some types of outfit you’ll see again and again at kink events and play parties, and which are almost always appropriate. Lingerie (such as bra-and-panties sets, bodysuits, and chemises), corsets, kilts, suits, and little black dresses will usually be absolutely fine.
In some spaces, black jeans and a button-down shirt or the kind of dress you’d wear to go clubbing will also be acceptable.
Latex, Leather and Rubber, Oh My!
Certain fabrics have specifically kinky connotations: latex, leather, rubber, PVC, and so on. If any of these fabrics appeal to you, they can be a great starting point for an outfit.
You don’t need to shell out a lot of money unless you want to. A PVC/leather-look piece of the kind available at many sex shops is a great alternative to more expensive real leather. Lovehoney’s Easy-On Latex items are an affordable alternative to the price-tag of custom latex that I wear regularly. They’re also a great choice for those of us who are too clumsy to want to risk traditional latex (hi!)
You can also invest in a single piece, such as a leather corset or pair of trousers or a latex top, and then build your outfit around that from cheaper items or things you already own. Even an accessory made of one of these fabrics, such as latex suspenders, gauntlets or a pair of gloves, can give a nod to these fetishes without the cost of a full outfit.
Accessorise to Impress
I wear a lot of the same outfits again and again to different parties. What I like to do, though, is accessorise them differently. A few appropriate accessories can really elevate your outfit and allow you ro express your kinky self.
My current kinky accessory obsession? These amazing hand harnesses. I’ve worn them with everything from dungarees to a corset, and I love them. I also like to finish off my party outfit with a perfume that matches my vibe for the night, whether it’s something sweet and flirty or sultry and sensual.
Let’s Talk Shoes
One common misconception is that women or femme-presenting people have to wear heels in kink spaces. This isn’t the case at all. I very rarely wear heels to kink parties because, well, they fucking hurt and I have chronic pain in my feet anyway without making it worse.
Of course, you can wear those sky-high heels if you like. But if you’d rather not, you can also opt for low heels or for flat shoes/boots. Just make sure they’re clean, polished, and go with your outfit. If in doubt, you’ll rarely go wrong with a nice pair of plain black shoes or boots in your preferred style.
Statement shoes can also be fun, if that’s your thing. My turquoise glitter flats get a lot of outings with various outfits! You’ll also likely see footwear brands such as New Rocks, Doc Martens, Koi, and their various equivalents in kink spaces.
Hair & Makeup
If you’re the kind of person who likes doing fun things with your hair and/or makeup, a kink party is a great chance to go wild. Why not experiment with a new temporary hair colour (or a wig), a fabulous eye makeup look, a bold lipstick, or even something more outlandish such as glitter or body-paint?
Nails can be a fun place to express your style, too. I often get my nails done before a big event and I usually opt for something ostentatious and over the top (typically with sparkles and lots of colour.) Of course, a striking black or classic red polish are also great options.
If makeup, nail polish and fancy hairstyles aren’t your thing, that’s cool too! Just make sure your hair is washed and your nails are clean, and you’ll be fine.
Wear Your Kink
Collars are perhaps the most common accessory you’ll see people wearing in kink spaces. If you have a collar you love (whether it’s associated with a specific relationship or not) then wearing it can help you to get into a kinky headspace. You can add a leash, too, if you like.
That latex outfit might look amazing, but if it takes 30 minutes to get in and out of it, is it the best choice for an event where you’re going to want to get naked to play or get in the hot tub? You might love your favourite corset, but is it practical for moving around in as you flog or tie up your partner?
Don’t forget to think about what you might want to do at the party and factor these practicalities into your kink party outfit choice.
Consider the weather, too. If it’s 35°C out, you probably don’t want to wear a full latex catsuit. (Ask me how I know.)
Don’t Overthink It
This is a lot of information and a lot of things to think about as you plan your kink party outfit. A play party can be a great place to experiment with different modes of presentation and tap into your most authentic self.
The most important thing in deciding what to wear to a play party is that it makes you feel good. You won’t have a good time if you feel like you’re pretending to be someone you’re not.
Here are my five golden rules for putting together an amazing kink party outfit:
Check the dress code, follow it, and ask the organisers if in doubt
Make an effort and get creative
Wear something that makes YOU feel amazing, focusing on being authentic and true to yourself
Don’t forget the details, from accessories and shoes to hair and makeup – they can lift your entire look!
Think about the practicalities.
This is supposed to be fun, so enjoy yourself no matter what you decide to wear.
This post contains affiliate links. All views, as always, are mine.
Do you enjoy the sensation, or the idea, of having someone ejaculate inside you or on your body? Getting aroused by bodily fluids such as semen (cum) is very common. You might think that you need a partner to enjoy this particular kink, but that’s not necessarily true. Enter ejaculating dildos.
Ejaculating dildos, also known as squirting dildos, are designed to squirt a liquid out of the tip in a way that mimics a bio-cock ejaculating. They typically have a bulb, syringe, or similar receptacle inside which you can fill with liquid, and then a tube that connects this to the head of the toy. There will be something you can press or squeeze to have the toy ejaculate when you want it to.
Why Use an Ejaculating Dildo?
Playing with bodily fluids such as cum can be extremely hot. However, it also carries some risks including STI transmission and unwanted pregnancy if you are a person who can get pregnant. You may not be willing or able to take those risks, or only be willing to take them within a very specific relational context. They also require a partner or partners. If you’re single or not in a relationship where fluid exchange is part of your dynamic, an ejaculating dildo can be an accessible and safe alternative.
In addition, ejaculating dildos allow you to experiment with and indulge various kinks, fetishes, and fantasies. We’ll look at some of those in more detail below.
How to Choose and Set Up an Ejaculating Dildo
Many ejaculating dildos are still made out of unsafe materials such as jelly, PVC and latex. These materials are porous and often contain toxic additives such as phthalates, which should not be going anywhere near your body. Always look for an ejaculating dildo made from a body-safe material, typically silicone. Consider the size, shape, texturing, and aesthetic preferences that work for you, too.
Good ejaculating dildos are easy to set up, though the specifics will vary product to product. Manufacturers usually provide instructions along with their toys. Typically you’ll need to suck up your chosen liquid into the bulb or syringe and then reattach it to the tube and the toy.
It’s also important to learn how to clean your ejaculating dildo properly. Leaving liquids such as lube inside your toy can breed bacteria and may damage the toy or lead to an infection. Again, follow the manufacturer’s instructions here. In general, silicone can be boil-sterilised for a thorough cleaning. Plastic components can be cleaned with warm water and a gentle antibacterial soap or with a body-safe sterile wipe (I buy these from an online medical supplies store.) Take particular care in creases, crevices and small parts where fluids can build up.
Which Kinds of Lube Are Best?
The most common liquid to use with an ejaculating dildo is lubricant. You have a few different options to choose from here, and it depends what your main goals are in using an ejaculating dildo.
If you want to simulate the feeling of a bio-cock ejaculating as closely as possible, then “cum lube” (which is designed to mimic the look, colour and consistency of cum) is your friend. Remember to pay attention to the ingredients if the lube is going to be going inside you. Avoid ingredients like glycerin, propylene glycol, and parabens. If the lube is just going to stay on the outside of your body, this is less of a concern.
If your toy is silicone, do not use a silicone-based lube as it may damage the toy.
What Kinks and Fetishes Can You Explore with Ejaculating Dildos?
Everyone who is into ejaculating dildos enjoys them in different ways and for different reasons. But if you’re curious, here are a few of the kinks, fetishes and fantasies you can explore or play out using them.
Simultaneous Climax
In reality, both partners reaching orgasm at the same time during penetrative (vaginal or anal) sex is difficult to achieve. I advocate against making it a goal, because chasing it can just stress you out and take the fun out of things.
However, if you want to feel someone ejaculate inside you at the same moment that you climax, you can easily simulate this with an ejaculating dildo. Simply press the bulb or syringe at the right moment.
Threesomes or Group Sex
Threesomes and group sex are incredibly common fantasies, but not everyone can (or wants to) act them out in reality. However, you can simulate some aspects of the experience using toys.
For example, perhaps you’re into the idea of double penetration and having both partners ejaculate inside you at the same time. If so, using an ejaculating dildo along with being penetrated by your partner, and pressing the button on the dildo at the same moment that they climax, can provide a similar physical sensation. And if you’re single or playing solo, there’s nothing to stop you using two ejaculating dildos at the same time (though this might require some impressive physical dexterity but if you can pull it off, have at it!)
Cuckolding or Chastity
Chastity refers to restricting or inhibiting someone’s ability to orgasm, either through instructions or a physical barrier such as a chastity device. Cuckolding refers to getting turned on by your partner having sexual experiences with others, often as part of a submission or humiliation kink.
Ejaculating dildos can be a great addition to these kinks and fantasies without the need to involve third parties. For example, you can make your cuckold partner watch without touching themselves while your dildo ejaculates inside you. Adding dirty talk can make the experience feel even hotter and more authentic.
Bukkake
Bukkake refers to multiple people ejaculating onto the body or face of another person. It’s a surprisingly common fetish! Ejaculating dildos can be a safe and simple way to explore this kink, enjoying the physical sensation of having cum on your body and the fantasy of multiple partners ejaculating over you.
Impregnation
Impregnation kinks are also surprisingly common. This refers to being turned on by the idea of someone getting you pregnant.
The majority of people with this kink do not actually want to become pregnant, and certainly not every time they have sex. Many people play with it by having trusted partners ejaculate inside them without barriers while using birth control. Another easy way to play with this kink without the risk of actual pregnancy is to use an ejaculating dildo.
What Do YOU Like About Ejaculating Dildos?
With any kink, the most interesting question to me is always “what appeals about this to you?”. So ask yourself why you’re drawn to ejaculating dildos. What is it about them that you like? What fantasy or interest do they hit? Your reasons might not be the same as anyone else’s, and that’s great. Sex and kink are, after all, spaces of infinite variety.
Thanks to Nothosaur for sponsoring this post! Check out their range of ejaculating dildos, fantasy toys, and much more. All views and writing mine. Images and GIFs kindly provided by Nothosaur.
When you think of BDSM and kink, what colour palette do you think of? Chances are you’re imagining black, right? Maybe touches of red or purple? But that aesthetic isn’t for everyone. What if you want your kink to be pretty and pastel, to have a look that’s light and playful or just plain fun? Fortunately there are now more options than ever for kinksters of all tastes, from custom BDSM collars and impact toys to beautiful basics in an array of colours and styles, like this pink collar and leash set in vegan leather from Liebe Seele.
Dark Candy Pink Collar & Leash Set
Image: Liebe Seele
Dark Candy is a new range from Japanese brand Liebe Seele (which means “dear soul” in German, by the way.) The Dark Candy range consists of various pieces of BDSM gear including cuffs, blindfolds, collars, gags, and impact toys, all in black or pink faux leather. I received the pink collar and leash set.
This set consists of two pieces, both made from organosilicon faux leather (more on that in a minute) with nickel-free metal hardware. The collar is fully adjustable to fit all neck sizes from 30.5 up to 44.5cm. The leash can be attached or detached from the collar using the clip and the central O-ring.
Vegan Faux Leather
The Dark Candy collar and leash set, like everything else in this range, is made from Organosilicon PU, a vegan-friendly alternative to leather that mimics the look and feel of the real thing.
Many vegan leather alternatives, including traditional polyurethane, are controversial due to their negative environmental impacts. Organosilicon is an alternative that, according to some sources, is far more environmentally friendly. I’m not quite prepared to declare it totally eco-friendly because few of the sources I could find for this claim could be called unbiased. But, if you’re looking for an animal-free alternative to leather that is less problematic than traditional PU or plastic leathers, organosilicon may be worthy of consideration.
Organosilicon leather is also able to withstand both hot and damp conditions better than animal or plastic leathers. This makes it a practical choice if you’re looking for a hardwearing regular-use collar.
Look, Feel & Function
I really like both the look and feel of this collar.
The light dusky pink is pretty and femme. I’d wear it as a finishing touch to a cute and pastel fetish look or to add a fun and unexpected pop of colour to an all-black outfit.
It appears well-made, with neat and sturdy stitching and robust-feeling hardware. It feels like you could comfortably give it a good tug without doing any damage (carefully. Necks are delicate.)
Most importantly, this collar is so, so soft! This is really important to me from a comfort perspective; my particular flavour of neurospiciness makes me highly sensitive to sensations and textures, and uncomfortable fabrics and sensations against my skin can be utterly unbearable.
The downside of vegan leathers is that they do not “breathe” in the same way as animal leathers. This means that my neck does get quite sweaty when I wear this collar for a while. If you’re wearing a collar made of a fabric like this, I’d recommend taking it off every few hours to give your skin chance to breathe.
The Dark Candy pink collar and leash set retails for a budget-friendly £33. You can also enjoy 15% off sitewide using my links and entering code Amy15 at checkout.
Thanks to Liebe Seele for sending me the Dark Candy Pink Collar and Leash Set to review. All views, as always, are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.
When you first start out in kink and BDSM, you might be thinking about building up a toybag. Perhaps you’ve been exploring for a while and you’re ready to upgrade your basic kit for something a bit fancier. Perhaps you’re in a new relationship or have a special occasion coming up and want to treat yourself or your partner to something special. Custom BDSM collars, outfits, toys, and other handmade kink gear can be amazing, one-of-a-kind additions to your collection.
To be absolutely clear: you don’t need expensive custom gear to be kinky. We’ve all met those individuals who think that a toybag worth thousands of dollars makes them a truer kinkster but who doesn’t know how to actually use any of that stuff safely. Kink isn’t about the toys you own. You can do amazing things with your bodies, with your imaginations, with pervertables, and with some basic items from a beginners’ bondage kit or your local sex shop.
But if you want to add some artisan or custom kink pieces to your collection, here are five places you can go to find them.
Go to a Fetish Market
I love a fetish market (though my bank balance does not!) Fetish markets or kink markets are in-person events where vendors can come to network, meet customers, and sell their wares.
Some happen at regular intervals, such as the monthly Birmingham Bizarre Bazaar/BBB in the UK and the annual Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco. Others are pop-up or one off events. You’ll also find kink and fetish sections in the vendors’ area at some Pride festivals.
The beauty of fetish markets is that you can see and handle items before you buy them. You may even be able to try things – try that collar on, swing those custom floggers against your arm to see how they feel – before you commit. And, since most kinky crafters and makers are hugely passionate about what they do, you’ll benefit from their knowledge and advice to help you choose the perfect thing for you.
Etsy (Maybe?)
The Etsy adult content guidelines have made the news over the last couple weeks as the popular crafters’ and makers’ marketplace has clamped down on pornography, sex toys, and other sexual content. At the time of writing, the guidelines explicitly state that kink and BDSM products ARE still permitted:
Etsy allows the sale of non-insertable and non-penetrable adult toys and sexual accessories, as long as they meet our requirements for sale on Etsy. This includes items such as restraints, handcuffs, nipple clamps, body harnesses, sex furniture, and BDSM accessories.
Permitted adult toys and sexual accessories may not be shown in use or worn by human models in listing or review photos. Consider using a mannequin or flat lay photography instead.
Etsy content guidelines as of 11/07/2024
So this is good news for those who buy or sell handmade and custom kink gear. It may change, of course, so keep an eye on it. For now, though, there are thousands of beautiful kinky pieces from custom BDSM collars, cuffs and harnesses to wax play kits, floggers, whips, clamps and much more for sale on Etsy.
A couple of my personal favourites are Kandles by Kitten for the best wax play candles you’ll ever try, and Freebound Studio for all-vegan collars, cuffs and more.
Commission a Maker Directly
If you find a particular artist or maker you like but they don’t have quite what you’re looking for, ask if you can commission them to make you something unique. Others in your local kink community will probably also have recommendations for their favourite makers. A commission allows you to choose everything from the colours and materials to the sizing.
Again, kinky makers and crafters tend to get into this field because they love it. So if you ask them to help you create something, you’re sure to end up with a unique and beautiful piece you’ll love.
Make Your Own
Not everyone can or wants to get into making their own stuff, of course. This isn’t an easy or quick solution. Many kinky makers have spent years honing their crafts to get as good as they are. But if you’re passionate about making things, have the time, and are willing to drop money on the equipment you’ll need, making your own is one way to guarantee you get something truly bespoke.
Of course, if you already have a crafty talent – such as leatherworking or wood-turning – it should be easy to turn your skills to kinkier projects.
Don’t try to make your own sex toy unless you have an excellent working knowledge of body-safe materials and how to work with them, and test your handmade kink gear thoroughly before you use it on a person.
Check Out the Spicerack
Spicerack is a new platform that is basically Etsy for adults! This sex-positive online marketplace allows makers to sell products from sex toys and BDSM gear to lingerie, accessories, art, novelties, sexual wellness products and more. It’s an absolute treasure-trove of
For example, The Kinky Peach sells made-to-order and custom BDSM collars in delightfully whimsical and playful designs. LVX offers custom floggers in a range of handle wood and leather colour options. And I am absolutely lusting over Naughty Pawsies’ colourful shades and quirky pieces.
Whatever your kinky heart desires, there’s probably someone on Spicerack selling it… or someone you can commission to make it for you!
Affiliate links appear in this post. All views, as always, are mine.
