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Bestvibe CYRUS thrusting realistic dildo

Review: Bestvibe CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo

Published on January 6, 2023January 6, 2023 by AmyLeave a comment

Happy new year, friends! 2022 was a rough one and I’m not naive enough to say “2023 is going to be my year!” We’re all still facing ongoing challenges due to *gestures vaguely at everything*. Personally, I’ll be satisfied if 2023 reaches the bar of “better than 2022.”

With that said, it’s time to dive into my very first review of the new year: the CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo from Bestvibe.

Bestvibe CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo

Bestvibe approached me right before the holidays to ask if I’d be interested in reviewing any of their products. Since I get asked about recommendations for both realistic toys and thrusting toys all the time, I thought I’d choose this one, which ticks both of those boxes.

The CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo is designed to closely resemble a bio-cock. It is impressively detailed, with a veined shaft, textured balls, a pronounced head, and even skin texturing at the base of the head. If you’re looking for a highly detailed realistic toy without breaking the bank, look no further.

The CYRUS measures 9″ from base to tip, of which 7″ is insertable length, and 1.59″ in diameter at the widest point. This makes it a little larger than the average factory-installed penis, but not scarily huge. Due to the internal mechanisms and dense silicone, it weighs in at a hefty 490g. It features a suction cup base, allowing for hands-free play or harness compatibility for strap-on sex.

The CYRUS is made of body-safe silicone. Since the texture is quite similar to some TPE/TPR toys I’ve handled, I flame tested it to be sure, and I’m pleased to say it’s definitely silicone. (The lack of any discernible smell also tipped me off that it’s real silicone.) Body safety is often sacrificed in favour of “real feel” materials when it comes to realistic toys, so I’m always delighted to find safe, non-porous alternatives.

The CYRUS is IPX5 waterproof, meaning it can withstand a sustained, low-pressure spray of water such as that from a home tap. This means you can safely get your toy wet to wash it, but shouldn’t submerge it in water. It is rechargeable via the included cable and comes with a battery-operated remote control (1 x 27A 12V battery is included.)

The CYRUS retails for a very reasonable $77 and is currently on sale at $66.

Settings and Controls

There are two ways to control the CYRUS: via the button on the base or via the remote control. Using the button, you’ll be able to scroll through 9 different patterns of vibration and their corresponding inbuilt thrusting patterns (there are 3 different thrusting patterns.)

With the remote, you can enjoy a much finer level of control, pairing any of the 3 thrusting and rotating modes with any of the 9 vibration patterns for a completely customisable experience. You can also use either the vibrations or thrusting separately, if you like.

The button on the base of the toy is a little stiff and requires quite a firm press. The buttons on the remote control, on the other hand, are easy to press. The toy’s responsiveness to the remote is fast and reliable, and the range of the remote is 10 metres.

In Use

The CYRUS’s realistic design is ideal for users looking for the most lifelike experience possible from a toy. The shaft is rigid most of the way along, though the soft and squishy head (the last inch or so) really makes a positive difference from a comfort and ease of use perspective. The pronounced and ridged head is ideal for G-spotting.

I also really love the dual density feel. This means that the toy has a firm core on the inside, and a softer layer on the outside. Like an erect penis, in other words!

The CYRUS’s thrusting mechanism feels amazing in use. If you have a vulva and enjoy dual stimulation, try using it hands-free (or asking a partner to use it on you) and pairing it with your favourite clitoral vibe. I actually prefer to use the thrusting mode alone, because I’m not the biggest fan of internal vibrations. Though it’s far too large for me to have tried it in this way personally, the CYRUS is also anal-safe if that’s your jam.

One of my favourite features of the CYRUS is its “warming” function. Press the little flame icon on the remote, and the toy will warm to 38℃ (just very slightly above human body temperature). This really enhances the experience if you’re looking for a toy that feels as realistic as possible. Instead of cool silicone, you can mimic the natural warmth you’d feel with a partner’s cock.

The CYRUS’s silicone is quite “grabby” due to its matte texture. Therefore, I’d really recommend using plenty of lubricant for a comfortable experience. Any water-based lube will work. It will also pick up dust and lint in storage, so give it a quick wipe before each use.

The vibrations aren’t massively strong and are a little buzzy, but they are concentrated in the head of the toy. If you like really powerful G-spot vibrations, this one might not be for you. But if you’re happy with gentler vibes (or mainly here for the thrusting function, as I was) this shouldn’t be too much of a problem.

Volume-wise, the vibrations are very quiet. The thrusting mode isn’t exactly loud, but it does have a very distinctive sound that’s best described as a repetitive, high-pitched whirr. The suction cup is strong and stays in place well on every surface I’ve tried it on.

Verdict

I really like this one! If I’m honest, realistic dildos aren’t often my thing, aesthetically speaking. I tend to prefer more abstract, colourful (and occasionally glittery) designs. But functionally, it absolutely gets the job done and comes with some great extra features. If I was going to recommend one body-safe, realistic toy that is very reasonably priced, it might be this one.

Thanks to Bestvibe for sending me the CYRUS to review. All views are, as always, my own. This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write an honest review.

Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator review header

[Toy Review] Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator

Published on December 18, 2022December 18, 2022 by AmyLeave a comment

Rose sex toys seem to be all the rage at the moment, possibly largely thanks to one such product going viral on TikTok in early 2021. Since then, many different variations on the theme have come out from various companies, some of which I’ve tested in the past. This week, I received another of these toys to try out: the Seductive Rose Vibrator from Lovegasm.

Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator: Details

The Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator is a clitoral “suction” toy, meaning that it has an open nozzle and delivers stimuation to the clitoris via pulses of air. This petite toy measures just 2.6″ from base to top, and 2.3″ in diameter at the widest point. The nozzle is 0.5″ in diameter. It’s light and easy to hold, coming in at a petite 124g.

The charging time is around 75 minutes, and you’ll get 75-90 minutes use out of a full charge. The Seductive Rose Vibrator has a waterproof rating of IPX4, meaning it is splashproof but you should not submerge it in water.

In the box you’ll also find a magnetic USB charging stand, an instruction leaflet, and a drawstring storage bag,

The Seductive Rose Vibrator is coated in 100% soft and body-safe silicone. Confusingly, the box it came in claims the material is “silica gel”, which is a different thing entirely. I flame-tested the toy and the results indicate real silicone, which is what I already suspected from the look and feel of the material, so you can use it with confidence.

If you like pretty toys, you’ll love this one. The toy is a lovely deep red and the silicone is fashioned into delicate rose petals at the top.

Settings and Controls

The Seductive Rose offers 3 constant speeds and 7 patterns. You control these through a single button interface located just below the centre of the toy’s main body. The button is easy to press and responsive. It also lights up, making it easy to see if you’re playing in low light.

I would have preferred both-ways controls to switch between settings. However, I can forgive that oversight in a toy at this price-point.

Does it Feel Like Cunnilingus?

These types of suction-based sex toys are often marketed as oral sex simulators. While I sort of understand where the thinking behind this is coming from, it’s just not really accurate. Cunnilingus is a very, very difficult think to effectively mimic with a sex toy. Despite valiant efforts, I’m not sure any toy manufacturer has succeeded yet.

So does the Seductive Rose Vibrator feel like receiving cunnilingus? No. That doesn’t mean it’s not a good toy, but it means I cannot get behind the claim that the Seductive Rose Vibrator will “satisfy your craving for oral action.” I’ve used enough pressure wave toys at this point that I don’t go in expecting them to feel like cunnilingus. A beginner to this type of toy might not know that, though, and I don’t think this kind of marketing is helpful.

In Use

With the above said, I actually think the Seductive Rose Vibrator is a great toy! The motor is strong enough to get the job done, and the range of settings allows you to explore with different sensations. I also like that the smaller nozzle allows for intensely focused and targeted clitoral stimulation. This is such an easy toy to use – I pretty much just switch it to my favourite setting, put it in place, and hold it there until I come. Bliss!

Here’s a little pro tip for you: if a toy like this one is too intense when you place it directly over your clit, try positioning it over the hood instead. You’ll still get all that focused sensation, but with a little less intensity.

The Seductive Rose Vibrator isn’t too loud, coming in at around 60 dB at its loudest. If it’s switched on and the door is closed, it cannot be heard in the next room.

Thanks to its light weight, the Seductive Rose is easy to angle and position. It is comfortable to hold in place even for an extended session. It’s worth bearing in mind that the nozzle is on the smaller side. Genitals, like all body parts, come in different shapes and sizes and this toy might not be a good fit if you have a larger glans clitoris (that’s the external bit.)

Verdict

The Seductive Rose retails for just £34, making it an excellent budget-friendly sex toy. With body-safe materials, a decent motor, multiple settings to choose from, and an attractive design, it’s got everything you need in a basic clitoral toy at an affordable price-point.

This review was sponsored by Lovegasm.co, meaning I was paid to test the toy and give my honest opinion. All views are, as always, my own. Don’t forget to check out Lovegasm’s full catalogue of products!

[Toy Review] PinkPunch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator

Published on December 9, 2022December 9, 2022 by AmyLeave a comment

I’ve reviewed many different styles of sex toys at this stage. There’s the classic vibrators and dildos, of course. But I’ve also tested toys shaped like penguins, whales, emojis, birds, roses, and more. Until this week, though, I have never tested a vibrator shaped like a mushroom!

PinkPunch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator: Details

PinkPunch got in touch and asked me to test their brand new Sunset Mushroom vibrator, which is the result of multiple years of development and a significant financial investment. I was only too happy to agree!

The Sunset Mushroom is a miniature app-controlled vibrator made of silky smooth and body-safe matte silicone. It measures just under 4″ in total length and looks like a little pink mushroom with cream and orange detailing. The design is really cute and eyecatching. I particularly like the detailing on the mushroom head and the translucent top layer of silicone gives it a softened, otherworldly aesthetic.

The Sunset Mushroom Vibrator comes with its own wireless charging case (think the sort of thing that you charge Airpods in!) This means you don’t need to plug the toy into the wall to charge it. As long as the case is charged, the toy will charge up automatically when you pop it into the case. The little heart light will flash to indicate that the toy is charging. This design makes the toy ideal for travel. A full charge takes 30 minutes and you’ll get an hour of runtime (charging the case takes around 2 hours.) The Sunset Mushroom is also fully waterproof, though its charging case is not.

My Sunset Mushroom Vibrator arrived in discreet, nondescript packaging. Inside, the toy is attractively boxed in cute branded packaging and fastened with a PinkPunch branded ribbon. Inside the box you’ll find the toy, its charging capsule, a micro USB cable to plug it in, a detachable pull loop with you can optionally clip onto the toy, and a little PinkPunch pin badge. You’ll also find an envelope containing an instruction leaflet and some PinkPunch stickers. It’s clear that real thought has gone into the presentation here, making this toy lovely for gifting or just as a treat for yourself.

PinkPunch sunset mushroom vibrator in its case

The Sunset Mushroom Vibrator retails for $99 (just over £80), which is at the lower end of the price range for an app-controlled toy. But how did it fare in use?

Sunset Mushroom Vibrator In Use: Manual

Despite its small size, the PinkPunch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator packs, well, a punch when it comes to features and functionality.

The motor is sensibly located in the head of the mushroom for best vibration transferrence. This isn’t quite as powerful as I would ideally like and it’s a little buzzy. The handle also vibrates a little during use, so be aware of this if that’s likely to be a problem for you.

The single-button interface is sensibly located on the base of the toy and is easy to press to cycle through the inbuilt three constant vibration speeds and four patterns.

Here’s a really cool thing about this toy: at first glance it looks like it’s primarily a clitoral vibrator (essentially it’s a mini wand!) but, thanks to the included detachable pull-loop to aid with easy removal, you can also use it as an internal vibrator. It’s small enough that it can even function as a leave-in if you like, stimulating you as you go about your day.

One of my favourite aspects of the Sunset Mushroom Vibrator’s design is the rigid neck. This means that you can get a good amount of pressure without it flexing away from your body. The curved shape and large, rigid head is amazing for targeted G-spot stimulation. I also really love the texturing on the tip of the head for clitoral play which, when coupled with a little water-based lube, adds a lovely additional sensation.

Personally, and perhaps surprisingly, I like this one best as an internal toy. The vibrations weren’t quite enough for me to orgasm clitorally, which tends to require very high powered and rumbly vibes. But I prefer gentler toys for internal use. The lower level vibrations combined with the fantastic shape and bulbed mushroom head made it the ideal long-term wear G-spot toy for me.

Unlike so many toys that make this claim, the Sunset Mushroom Vibrator actually is impressively quiet. It’s unlikely anyone in the next room will hear it unless you have paper-thin walls. And if you want to surreptitiously play in public, it’s likely to be fine anywhere with a reasonable level of ambient background noise.

Sunset Mushroom Vibrator In Use: App Functionality

The Sunset Mushroom Vibrator functions just fine by itself, but really comes into its own when coupled with the PinkPunch app, which is available for free on both Android and iOS. Once you’ve downloaded the app, you’ll need to set up an account using your email address. It’ll ask you for your date of birth (I’m not really sure why? A licensing requirement for an 18+ product maybe?) and your gender (there are, sadly, only “male” and “female” options.)

Once you’re in, you need to connect your toy by following the instructions on the leaflet. This took less than a minute and connected the first time with no issues. At this point, the app gives you an array of options.

To start controlling your toy from your phone, click “start”. You can then scroll through the four different pattern options and change the speed with a swipe of your finger. The “Lottery” option is fun, cycling through patterns at random in ten-second increments.

You can give control to your partner using the “remote control” option. They will need to have the app downloaded on their phone. Then you simply give them a unique code which will allow them to control your toy until you end the session. This has good potential for people in long-distance relationships, as well as for online sex workers such as cam performers.

The app has a fun and colourful aesthetic that reminds me a little of a retro video game. There’s even a section where you can see your use stats and get reward badges for using different functions. So that’s fun if, like me, you are eternally motivated by little hits of digital dopamine.

Verdict

I really like this one! Even though I wasn’t blown away by the strength of the vibrations and am unlikely to use it again as a clitoral toy, it’s a surprisingly excellent insertable. The design is cute, the shape is excellent, and the app functionalities and portable charging case really elevate it.

You can get 30% off your order at PinkPunch.com with my exclusive discount code, Amy30.

This review was sponsored by the good folks at PinkPunch, meaning I was paid to test the product and write a fair and honest review. All opinions and experiences are, as always, my own.

[Toy Review] Ifonnx Euna App-Controlled Vibrator

Published on November 18, 2022November 18, 2022 by AmyLeave a comment

Wow, it has been a while since I’ve written a full toy review, hasn’t it? I have to admit that I’ve missed doing this, though, so it’s really nice to get back into the swing of things with the Euna app-controlled vibrator from Ifonnx.

Ifonnx Euna: Basics

The Ifonnx Euna is a curved vibrator that sits somewhere between a classic “love egg” and that whale thing I reviewed last year. Its insertable length is around 3.5″ and it has a long, curved tail for easy insertion and retrieval.

The single control button is located on the end of the tail and is large, easy to press, and prominent enough that you can feel for it without needing to look. Without using the app you’ll have access to 3 constant speeds and 8 patterns, which you can scroll through with the touch of the button.

The Ifonnx Euna is coated in 100% soft, hypoallergenic, and body-safe silicone. Mine is a bright shade of pink, and it’s also available in a dusky dark blue. It is IPX7 waterproof, meaning it can be submerged safely in shallow water for up to 30 minutes. In other words, if playing in the bath or shower is your thing, that’s totally possible.

The Euna retails for $96 at full price (around £80 GBP), which is a pretty competitive price point for a body-safe, rechargeable, waterproof, app-controlled toy. It arrived discreetly shipped and packaged in an attractive branded box made of recyclable cardboard with a plastic inlay tray.

Along with your toy, in the box you’ll find a charging cable (you’ll get 60 minutes use from a 60 minute charge), a red velvety storage pouch, an instruction leaflet, and a gift card for a discount off your next purchase.

Ifonnx App

The Ifonnx Euna is controllable from anywhere in the world via the free app, which is available on both iOS and Android. Weirdly, I couldn’t find the app by searching the Play Store, but it popped up immediately when I scanned the QR code on the toy’s instruction booklet.

It took a couple of attempts to connect my toy. For some reason, you have to have location permissions enabled for the app to pick up the device. I’m not sure why that should be but maybe someone with more Bluetooth knowhow can explain? But as soon as I’d figured that out, it conncted in less than a second.

Ifonnx Euna app-controlled vibrator app screenshot

Once you’re in the app, you have several options. The Motion option vibrates the toy along with movements of your phone, which has interesting potential for (for example) putting the phone in your or your partner’s pocket as you walk and feeling the vibrations with every step. The Sound setting picks up sounds in the surrounding area and vibes along to them. Try playing music, talking into it, or just keeping it switched on when you’re in a noisy space.

In the Patterns section, you can choose from 9 pre-set patterns or draw and save your own, giving you literally endless possibilities. Under Music, you can upload your own favourite tunes to vibe along to. And in the Remote Connect section, you can hand control over to your partner from anywhere in the world as long as there’s an internet connection.

You can even wake yourself or your partner up with vibrations, if you wish. Since this is an intertable leave-in vibrator, you can wear it overnight. Just set it to vibrate with your chosen pattern and specified intensity at the time you want to wake up. Well, there are worse ways to start your day!

The toy-to-app connection is excellent. Unlike many toys I’ve tried in this category, the connectivity is stable and reliable and the response speed is virtually instantaneous. It also has an attractive black and gold aesthetic and an intuitive user interface.

How Does It Feel?

I like the shape of the Ifonnx Euna a lot. Its slightly curved body provides a nice internal pressure. If you position it just right, the tip can rest against your G-spot. The flexible tale makes it easy and comfortable to insert and remove, and lies non-intrusively against your body while you’re wearing the toy. Thanks to the soft silicone, it’s comfortable enough for all-day wear if that’s your thing.

The vibrations are pretty strong and honestly, more powerful than many more expensive toys of this type that I’ve tried. Unfortunately, they are a little more buzzy than I prefer. If you enjoy deep rumbling vibrations, this might not be the toy for you.

Personally, it’s unlikely that I would orgasm with it, but it’s fun for an ongoing tease throughout the day, while out and about, or as a precursor to sex.

Verdict

The Ifonnx Euna is a great quality little vibrator with excellent app functionality. It also sits at a surprisingly affordable price point compared to many of its competitors!

Buy yours here and check out Infonnx’s other products while you’re there.

This review was sponsored, meaning I was paid to test the product and write a fair and honest review. All options and experiences are, as always, my own.

[Toy Review] Monster Pub Dr Whale 2

Published on April 19, 2022April 19, 2022 by Amy1 Comment

You’ve heard of rabbit vibrators. You’ve probably heard of Satisfyer’s famous Penguin clitoral suction toy. But have you ever seen a whale vibrator before? Well, now you have! Specifically, the Dr Whale vibrator, which I recently received to test and review.

Monster Pub Dr Whale 2: Basics

The Dr Whale 2 is a curved vibrator shaped like a little whale. It measures 7 inches in total when stretched out flat (4 inches insertable) and 1.3 inches in diameter at the widest point. It houses two motors, one in the whale’s “body” and one in its tail.

The Dr Whale 2 is coated in soft and body-safe silicone in a pretty shade of pale blue. It is rechargeable via the included USB cable and you get 120 minutes use out of a full charge. You also get a storage bag for the toy.

Confusingly, the website says the toy is waterproof but the included instruction booklet says NOT to submerge it in water. I’m going to assume that means it’s splashproof only, though I’m not entirely sure. I didn’t want to risk breaking it by submerging it. For a toy of this price point, though, I feel like “waterproof” should come as standard.

The Dr Whale 2 features an internal heating element that warms up to a comfortable 42C within a couple minutes of being switched on. Most intriguing of all, it is controllable via the Monster Pub app (available free on iOS and Android).

App-Controlled Kegel Exerciser

One of the advertised purposes of the Dr Whale 2 is as a kegel exerciser. Performing kegel exercises regularly can help strengthen your pelvic floor, which some evidence shows has a variety of benefits from better bladder control to stronger orgasms. I delved into some of the science on kegel exercises a long time ago on this blog, and anecdotal evidence seems to suggest that while using internal exercisers like the Dr Whale 2 doesn’t necessarily make the kegel exercises more effective, using one might make you more likely to perform them regularly.

I downloaded the app and the toy connected easily. The connection is good, reliable and steady as long as you have a stable internet connection.

You have to set up an account on the app, which takes a few seconds. It also asks you to select your gender, but only offers “girl” and “boy” (which is weirdly infantilising as well as annoyingly binary.)

The app then asked me to complete a “Q&A For Girls” which consists of a few questions about whether you’re using the app alone or with a lover and whether you want to share it with a partner. It also, however, includes THIS:

I strongly suspect this is just some really, really bad Google Translate but the last thing I want to see in a sex toy app is talk of being “molested”. Gross. It also gives me pause about the app’s security and safety. Is it likely that someone is going to randomly take control of my toy? Because that’s, erm, deeply concerning if so.

Once you’re in, you can choose from a range of pre-set patterns and those created by other users. You can also create your own using the “Gesture” mode, connect with a partner via chat tools such as WeChat or WhatsApp, or make the vibes respond to movement with the “Action/Reaction” mode.

If you go into the “Health” tab at the top of the screen, you’ll find the various kegel exercise section. In this mode, a voice talks you through a range of exercises. The sessions are pretty short, stating at just 3 minutes, so they’re quite accessible. If you need a little extra encouragement to do kegel exercises regularly, you might enjoy being gently talked through it by the narrator’s soothing voice. I certainly find it helps me to actually bother doing my exercises!

The app responsiveness is good. It’s also fairly intuitive to use, with just a few basic controls to get your head around.

What About as a Sex Toy?

I like the shape and flexibility of the Dr Whale 2. I also really like the gently ridged texture of the silicone on one side of the whale’s body. Its flexy tail means it will work for a variety of bodies and comfortable positioning is easy. The downside of the flexible tail is that, when you’ve inserted the toy, it’s difficult to get a satisfying amount of clitoral pressure.

I’m not really a fan of internal vibrations, though, so I soon turned to using it solely as a clitoral toy.

Unfortunately, the Dr Whale 2 really falls down for me on power. It’s not the worst by any stretch, and I’ve certainly used more expensive toys that were packing less of a punch than this one. But ultimately the vibrations are of mediocre strength and very buzzy. This toy is highly unlikely to ever get me off.

Verdict

A mixed bag here.

I do think the Dr Whale 2 is a good kegel exerciser. The guided sessions on the app are a nice touch and the vibrations add more pleasure to the whole process. As a sex toy, though, I’m unlikely to ever use it again. It’s just too buzzy and not really powerful enough to be satisfying.

The Monster Pub Dr Whale 2 retails for $119.00.

This review was sponsored, meaning the company paid me to write an honest review. All views and experiences are my own.

Orgazmic waterproof clitoral vibrator review header

[Toy Review] Orgazmic Waterproof Clitoral Vibrator

Published on December 8, 2021December 6, 2021 by AmyLeave a comment

When Honey Play Box invited me to review some products from their extensive range, I was immediately drawn to the Orgazmic Waterproof Clitoral Vibrator. Its interesting shape and remote control functionality suggested a range of interesting possibilities.

But did it impress me when I tried it out?

What is the Orgazmic?

Orgazmic waterproof clitoral vibrator, vibrator for women, people with vulvas, couples

The Orgazmic is a small clitoral vibrator. It measures 4.16″ in length and 1.05″ across at the widest point and is coated in 100% body-safe, hypoallergenic silicone. It’s available in pink or purple. It is rechargeable via the included magnetic cable, with a full charge giving around 2 hours of play.

The Orgazmic is completely waterproof, so you can use it in the bath or shower if that’s your thing.

My Orgazmic came packaged discreetly in a solid, plain black box. Great for gifting and also works well as a storage box.

My Experience

As soon as I pulled it out of the box, I knew I was going to absolutely love the shape of the Orgazmic. It is slightly curved, similar in shape to “panty vibes” you may have seen, with ribbing in the silicone at the wider end and a raised nub in the centre. This is a vibrator that’s absolutely made for grinding on! Slide it between bodies during sex with a partner, or place it on a firm surface. It also rests comfortably against the vulva as a lay-on toy, or even slips into your underwear, if you prefer.

Orgazmic panty vibrator, clitoral vibrator

The Orgazmic offers 9 different vibration modes including 3 constant speeds and 9 patterns, and operates on a simple 1 button interface.

While the Orgazmic offers a decent level of power for such a small toy, I really would have liked it to be rumblier. I much prefer deep, penetrating rumbles to the more surface-level vibes of the Orgazmic. Of course, this isn’t a universal experience! If you prefer higher frequency vibrations, the Orgazmic will suit you well.

The Orgazmic is easy to clean when you’re done. Just use some warm water and gentle soap or a sterile medical wipe.

Remote Control Capabilities

The Orgazmic comes with a separate remote control, which you can slip into your pocket or hand to your partner. I’m not sure exactly what the range is, but I tested it at a range of about 10 metres and it worked perfectly, so it’ll be suitable for most remote control play when you’re in the same physical space.

Remote from remote control vibrator panty vibrator

The Orgazmic is quiet-ish, topping out at around 45 dB. If you want to use it out and about, I’d recommend choosing spaces that have a decent level of ambient noise to begin with. Remember it’s not cool to involve others in your play without consent!

Remember that the remote control will also need charging (via the same cable as the toy), so factor that in to your charging time before you play.

Verdict

The Orgazmic is a decent all-rounder if you like buzzier vibrations. It’s got a great shape, reliable remote control compatibility, and a good number of settings and patterns to choose from.

The Orgazmic retails for $51.99.

This review was sponsored by Honey Play Box. This means they provided me with this product and paid me to write a fair and honest review. All opinions are, as always, my own.

Honey Play Box tongue vibrators header image

[Toy Review] Seduction and Alvina Tongue Vibrators

Published on December 5, 2021December 5, 2021 by AmyLeave a comment

My favourite types of sex toys to try are those that I look at and think “I can’t even imagine what that would feel like!” Call me a curious creature, I guess. That’s why I was spoiled for choice when the good folks at Honey Play Box reached out and offered me a selection of products from their extensive catalogue – which includes suction toys, tongue vibrators, traditional vibes, and much more – to try.

In the end, I chose four products to test, and I’m going to talk about two of them in this post. “Tongue vibrators” are hit and miss for me in general, and I don’t think it’s realistic to expect a toy to effectively mimic receiving oral sex from a human partner. So with that in mind, could the Seduction and Alvina vibrators from Honey Play Box impress me?

Seduction

The Seduction (or Seduction Stimulation Suction Vibrator, to give it its full title) won the Xbiz Toy of the Year Award 2021, so I was very keen to test this award-winning product.

The Seduction’s innovative design combines suction (of the type you’d get from a pussy pump) with a rapid licking action from a small silicone tongue. The wide head sits over your vulva, creating a seal. This then provides suction either constantly or in a pulsing pattern, while the tongue laps at your clit. There are 5 suction modes and 10 tongue modes to choose from.

Buttons on Honey Play Box Seduction tongue vibrator

The only real downside for me was that I struggled to get the Seduction to create a proper vacuum against my vulva due to my pubic hair. I feel like this toy was definitely designed with hairless pussies or heavily trimmed pubes in mind. Getting it to stick in place and create a seal was a matter of trial and error, and it would dislodge with a small wrong movement. Adding a little water-based lube around the rim helped to get a seal.

Honey Play Box Seduction clit licking suction vibrator for a review of tongue vibrators

That frustration aside, I genuinely enjoyed using the Seduction. The suction function offers a new and different sensation that’s unlike any toy I’ve used before, and the flicking tongue is perfect for those like me who love intense and targeted clitoral stimulation.

The Seduction is rechargeable via the included cable (a full charge lasts around 3 hours) and made of body-safe silicone with ABS plastic accents. It’s also pretty quiet. The suction makes a distinctive whirring noise, but it’s not super loud and is unlikely to be audible, say, in the next room. The flicking tongue is impressively quiet. The Seduction is splashproof but not waterproof, so clean it with a medical wipe or a warm damp cloth but do not submerge it underwater.

Alvina

The Alvina (full title Alvina Luxury Tongue Licking Clitoral Vibrator) features a circular handle/base with a finger loop for ease of use. It’s ultra light and a pretty rose pink/red colour.

The Alvina opens at the top to reveal a wide silicone tongue. This tongue flicks back and forth in any one of 9 different speeds and patterns, controlled by a single button, and can be used by itself or with any of the 9 vibration patterns controlled by the second button. You can mix and match the two functions in any combination, creating over 80 different possible combinations. Pretty neat!

My clit adores the Alvina’s wide, flat tongue, especially when combined with plenty of lube. The gentle, rhythmical lapping is an amazing warm up and, when I add the vibrations, it becomes intense enough to get me off quickly and reliably.

Alvina tongue vibrator clitoral oral sex simulator

The vibrations are quite “buzzy”, which I’m usually not a big fan of, but in this context I find I don’t mind. I think the combination of vibration and tongue motion means that I don’t really notice that the vibes are buzzier than I’d typically go for.

Buttons on Alvina clit tongue vibrator from Honey Play Box

The Alvina is rechargeable, with a full charge lasting up to 3 hours. Like the Seduction, it’s impressively quiet. Made of silicone with ABS plastic, it is hygienic and body-safe. The Alvina is also waterproof, in case bath or shower play is your thing. Clean it using warm, soapy water or a sterile medical wipe.

So Which Do I Like More?

It’s a tough call, as I was genuinely impressed by both of these toys. But I think ultimately the Alvina has the edge for me. I found the slightly wider tongue more friendly to my sensitive clit, and this design more compatible with a body with pubic hair. But these are both cleverly designed, effective tongue vibrators that are distinct from anything else I have in my collection.

The Seduction retails for $106.99 and the Alvina retails for $71.99.

Heads up: this review was sponsored, meaning I was paid to test the products and provide my honest opinion. All views are my own, as always.

[Toy Review] Sohimi Rose Queen

Published on September 8, 2021September 8, 2021 by AmyLeave a comment

I tend to come to cheap sex toys with a healthy degree of scepticism. Yes, there are amazing toys costing under £30 out there. But so many budget sex toys are poor in quality, made of unsafe materials, have shitty buzzy motors, or die after three uses. I say all this to illustrate how impressed I was with the Sohimi Rose Queen, a $37.99 (that’s about £27.50) dual purpose sex toy that absolutely blew me away.

A Rose Queen by any other name…

(Yes, there are going to be rose puns.)

The Sohimi Rose Queen is a dual purpose sex toy shaped like – you guessed it – a rose on a stem. Look how pretty it is!

The flower part of the rose houses a clitoral suction toy, while the handle is a vibrator that can be used internally or externally. Given that the rose head offers a form of flared base, you could even use it anally, if you wanted.

The Sohimi Rose Queen is made of soft and body-safe silicone in a bright shade of red. (Real silicone, not a weird blend or an unsafe gel material masquerading as silicone!) It is rechargeable, offering an hour’s run time and taking around two hours to charge via the included magnetic cable, and fully waterproof.

This toy measures 8″ in total length, of which 6″ makes up the insertable handle and 2″ the rose head. The shaft measures 1.3″ in diameter at the widest point and is lovely and flexible.

Interface and functionality

The Sohimi Rose Queen features two buttons, located on the top of the shaft just below the rose head. The top button (with a lips icon) controls the suction functionality, while the bottom button (with a vibration waves icon) controls the vibrations in the shaft.

Sohimi Rose Queen double ended vibrator buttons

You can use both settings at once, though I’m not really sure why you’d want to.

The clitoral sucking rose head offers five settings: three constant speeds and two pulsing settings. The vibrating end, meanwhile, offers 10 settings: 3 speeds and 7 patterns. I’d have preferred two-way controls, as you have to scroll all the way through to find the settings you want, but we can’t have everything. Remember, this is a $38 vibrator.

Sohimi Rose Queen close-up of clitoral sucking vibrator

Volume-wise, the Rose Queen is acceptable. The vibrations are about what you’d expect for the level of power on offer. Unusually, the clitoral suction end actually gets louder when applied to the body. According to Sohimi, the toy’s highest volume is still under 30 dB, so it’s not egregiously loud or anything.

Rose to the occasion?

So how did the Sohimi Rose Queen fare in use?

The most important thing with any sex toy, ultimately, is “did it get me off?” And dear God, yes, the Rose Queen got me off!

The nozzle is wide enough to encompass a good portion of the external clit, and the silicone is soft enough to provide comfort during use, especially if you add plenty of lube to its rim.

Here’s something I’ve learned: if suction sex toys feel too intense for you, try applying the nozzle over your clitoral hood rather than directly to the glans itself. Many people find that this lowers the overwhelming intensity without reducing pleasure.

Sohimi Rose Queen flexible shaft vibrator

The shape of this toy is a real godsend. Many suction toys are difficult to hold or position in the way that works for my body, simply due to their shape. But the Sohimi Rose Queen’s flexible stem handle is not only comfortable and ergonomic to hold, but also makes it easy to manipulate the toy into my desired position and keep it there.

The vibrating end did less for me. I’m not a fan of internal vibrations, and the vibes are a little too buzzy to do much for me in the way of clitoral stimulation. However, the firm-yet-flexible silicone means it can be used as an insertable dildo for G-spot (or prostate) stimulation, if that’s your thing.

I doubt I’ll reach for the Rose Queen for internal use much, if at all. But that rose head end though? Yes, that’s going to see plenty of use!

Verdict

If you’re looking for an affordable, dual purpose sex toy that offers both vibrations and sucking action, then you’ve found it. The Rose Queen isn’t perfect, of course. The lack of two-way controls and the buzzy vibrations are notable downsides. But overall, it’s a great product that is made of quality materials and gets the job done.

I don’t usually care much about packaging, unless you count getting upset by excessive single-use plastics. But the Rose Queen came packaged in a lovely sturdy box with a rose design on the outside. If you’re on a budget but want to give your loved one a toy that feels special, this is a really nice touch that makes the Rose Queen ideal for gifting.

Get yours from Sohimi, who ship worldwide, and check out their other clitoral vibrators while you’re there.

This Sohimi Rose Queen review was sponsored. This does not impact my views of the product which are, and will always be, my own.

[Toy Review] Osuga Cuddly Bird

Published on July 30, 2021August 2, 2021 by Amy1 Comment

Osuga is a woman-owned sexual wellness brand founded in 2015 and based in Hong Kong. Their Cuddly Bird toy for people with vulvas has won awards including a Bronze IDEA Award (2020) and a Golden Pin Design Award (2019). So I was pretty excited to try it and see what all the hype is about.

The Osuga Cuddly Bird is so named, because… well, look at it!

It was posted discreetly and inside, the toy was packaged in a sturdy Osuga-branded box. In the box you’ll find the toy, its charging base and cable, a set of instructions, and a soft, velvety storage bag in the same colour as your toy.

Design and Materials

The Osuga Cuddly Bird is really two toys in one, featuring an ordinary motor for use as a traditional vibrator as well as a nozzle with clitoral suction function.

The Cuddly Bird measures just a hair over 3″ in height. Its body circumference is 7″ (2.2″ diameter) at the widest point, and the clitoral nozzle is 0.5″ in diameter. It weighs in at 133g.

This toy is made of ultra-soft silicone which feels thick and plushy as well as being body-safe and hygienic. Aesthetically, it’s really cute and pretty. I got the mint green variation (my favourite colour aside from purple!) but you can also get it in pastel pink or yellow. The inclusion of a matching storage bag is a nice touch. I particularly enjoyed the charging port looking like a little bird cage:

Cuddly Bird clit sucking vibrator in birdcage charging port

Fun fact: the charging cage will stay lit up as long as it’s plugged in, even as the toy is removed, so you could double its function as a mini night-light if you wish. If the toy is attached, the light will switch off when the toy is fully charged.

The Cuddly Bird is somewhat waterproof. The website says it’s suitable for shower usage and the booklet advises not submersing it below 30cm. Run time is about 2.5 hours on suction mode or 80 minutes on vibration mode for a full charge.

User Interface

The Cuddly Bird has two buttons, one for each of its functionalities. The button with the circle icon controls the suction, and the button with the two wavy lines icon controls the vibration.

The buttons are sensibly located on the base of the toy and are easy to press. Simply press and hold the button for your desired function to switch it on, use the same button to scroll through the settings (three vibration speeds and one pattern on the vibrating side, three speeds on the suction side.)

Be aware that you can’t use the vibrations and suction at the same time. It’s easy to switch between them, but I would have appreciated the ability to try using them together.

Cuddly Bird in Use

I’ll start by saying that the vibration settings didn’t really do much for me. They’re pretty buzzy, and that isn’t a sensation that works well for my body. The power is also dampened a lot by the thick silicone. If you prefer gentler or buzzier vibrations, the Cuddly Bird may work well for you. But if you’re like me and prefer a deeper rumble, skip this toy’s vibrating mode.

The suction setting, though? Well, that is a different matter entirely!

I have a pretty small glans clitoris (that’s the external bit, for anyone who isn’t a sex ed nerd like me!) and this toy’s nozzle is just the right size to envelop it.

I found the shape of the Cuddly Bird easy and comfortable to hold. For me, the best angle was using it sideways on (so the toy at 90 degrees to my body, closing around my clit from the left hand side). Your mileage may vary and suction toys are notoriously different for every body, so experiment and see what works for you.

Once I had the angle right, the Cuddly Bird delivered near-perfectly in terms of what I look for from a clitoral suction toy. It very quickly brought me to the point of orgasm. When I’d finished, my legs were shaking – always a sign of a good time!

Bonus: the Cuddly Bird is relatively quiet, maxing out at around 50dB. It easily passed my extremely scientific “door closed, under a blanket” test, and it’s quiet enough that I can comfortably watch porn or listen to audio smut while using it.

Top Tips for Choosing and Using Your Vibrator

I often say that sex education failed me and I believe it failed many of us. One of the most critical aspects of sexuality as a whole is… pleasure! And guess what didn’t get a mention in any of the sex ed I received? Yup, you’ve guessed it.

Like me, Osuga believes that “sex is a beautiful and natural experience” and wants everyone who desires it to have the best sex possible. What that looks like will be different for every person. But whether you’re monogamous or open, queer or straight, male or female or non-binary, you can use toys to enhance your sex life if you want to. Here’s a very quick rundown of my top tips for choosing and using a sex toy:

Pay attention to what YOU like, not what you (or your partner, or society) think people with your body parts are “supposed” to like.
Choose a body-safe product. There are so many affordable body-safe options on the market nowadays!
If you’re new to using toys, aim for a versatile product that you can use to explore different sensations.
Lube makes just about everything better. Choose a safe, water-based lube with as few ingredients as possible.
Clean your toy between every use (see the next section for more info) to keep it hygienic.
Consider experimenting with a toy on your own before introducing it into partnered sex.
If you’re bringing toys into partnered play (which is awesome – yay!) make sure you communicate honestly about what’s working and what isn’t. Aim for exploration and mutual pleasure, not a specific goal.

Most importantly of all, remember that sexuality and sexual pleasure are endlessly, beautifully unique. There’s no right and wrong way to explore or use toys. If you’re staying safe and having fun, then you’re doing it right.

How to Clean Your Sex Toy

If there’s one question about toys I get asked more than any other, it’s probably “how do I keep my sex toys clean?” I actually wrote a whole article about this, but here’s an executive summary:

You can boil a silicone or stainless steel sex toy that doesn’t contain a motor (or pop it in the dishwasher on the top rack).
For toys with motors, like the Cuddly Bird, you can’t boil them as it will destroy the motor. Instead, use either a 10% bleach solution (9 parts water to 1 part bleach) or a body-safe sterile wipe (I get mine from a medical supplies website). Then rinse your toy and let it dry thoroughly before you put it away.
It’s safe to share non-porous toys like the Cuddly Bird, in general, but sterilise it between users unless you’re fluid bonded.

If you take care of it, a body-safe sex toy in a material like silicone will last you for years. A great investment in your pleasure, I’m sure you’ll agree.

Cuddly Bird: Verdict

(Bird-ict? No.)

The Cuddly Bird is a really fabulous little clit sucker. It was a pleasure to use, it got the job done, and the fact that it’s cute as hell and in one of my favourite colours doesn’t hurt, either!

The Osuga Cuddly Bird retails for £78.21 (around $110 for my US friends). You can get $40 off using my link and the code “Coffee”.

Thanks to Osuga for sponsoring this review. Please note that sponsorship does not guarantee a glowing review and that all opinions are my own!

Funejoy clitoral sucking vibrator header image

[Toy Review] Funejoy Clitoral Sucking Vibrator

Published on July 29, 2021July 28, 2021 by AmyLeave a comment

This week, I’ve got a couple of reviews coming out for products from companies I haven’t worked with before. First up is Funejoy, based out of Japan and the US. They kindly sent me their Clitoral Sucking Vibrator to try.

I don’t think it’s a secret that I am not a big fan of Amazon. The Bezos Behemoth has a number of very significant issues and downsides. However, it’s also the biggest and most convenient retailer in the world, and most people (including me) shop there from time to time.

Sex toys on Amazon are a notorious minefield. There are many people selling knock-off versions of high-end and brand-name toys, which will not be under warranty and may not even be safe. There are many others selling cheap toys made of unsafe materials. But since it’s so convenient, there will always be people buying sex toys on Amazon. To that end, it’s always a relief when Amazon-based retailers stock products that are precisely as advertised.

Let’s dive into a closer look at the Funejoy Clitoral Sucking Vibrator.

Funejoy Sucking Vibrator: Details & Design

The Funejoy Clitoral Sucking Vibrator is a toy for people with vulvas based around the enduringly popular “suction” style stimulation. Instead of vibrating in the traditional sense, these toys deliver intense clitoral stimulation via rapid air pulses.

Funejoy clitoral sucking vibrator in red silicone

Many people find this sensation intensely pleasurable and some say it induces near-instant orgasms. As ever, your mileage may vary.

It arrived in discreet packaging and inside, the toy was packaged in a sturdy box along with its charging cable and user manual. It’s made of 100% silicone (yes I flame-tested it, and yes it’s definitely silicone!) with a soft matte finish and in a bright shade of red.

The toy measures 4″ in total length and is shaped like a teardrop – flat on one end and tapering to a point on the other. The suction nozzle sits in the centre of the flat end.

This toy is fully waterproof and submersible. Pro tip: suction toys can feel amazing underwater. If you’ve ever masturbated with a jacuzzi jet, the sensation is a little bit like that, only better! The Funejoy Clitoral Sucking Vibrator is rechargeable via the included USB cable and a magnetic charging port on the back.

Experience

To say I was pleasantly surprised by this toy would be an understatement. I always moderate my expectations when it comes to cheap toys (though let’s be real, high-end sex toys can be disappointing, too!) So I really wasn’t expecting the Funejoy Clitoral Sucking Vibrator to knock my socks off, so to speak… but it did.

Let’s start with the shape. I have really small hands and I found the teardrop shape ergonomic and comfortable to hold, even through long testing sessions.

The positioning of the nozzle also worked really well for my body. With some suction toys, I have to do strange hand or wrist contortions to get them to sit right. But this one rests comfortably against my body and envelopes my clit and clitoral hood easily.

The user interface consists of a single button to cycle through the settings (three constant speeds and seven patterns.) I’d have liked a back button, in an ideal world, but I can live without it given the way I use this toy.

Buy sex toys on Amazon from Funejoy, like this red clit suction toy

As anyone who has read my previous reviews will probably guess, it’s all about the three constant speeds for me. I like to start with the lowest one and build up slowly, only switching to the highest constant speed when I’m very close to orgasm. Even the low speed has some intensity behind it, and the top speed packs a hell of a punch. The pulsing patterns are fine if you like that sort of thing, but they’re not really for me.

The bottom line: it’s easy to use, it feels incredible, and it can get me off quickly and reliably.

A Note on Volume

Be aware that the Funejoy Clitoral Sucking Vibrator is a little loud. Not egregiously so, and all suction toys tend to have some volume to them, but it’s definitely noticeable. It juuuuuust passes the “under a blanket, door closed” test in my house, but if you have thin walls or roommates, this is something you’ll want to be aware of.

Someone in one of the Amazon reviews states that you could use it in the office without anyone noticing and… unless your office is literally on a building site with power tools going off all day, that is laughably untrue. But don’t use sex toys in the office anyway, your colleagues didn’t consent to that and you could get fired!

Verdict

A really pleasant surprise that has left me genuinely impressed! If you’re looking for a clitoral sucking toy and you’re on a budget, this is a safe and quality option for the price.

The Funejoy Clitoral Sucking Vibrator retails for $34.99 (that’s about £25 to my fellow Brits.) You can get 50% off for a limited time using my code, DXTPF9AL.

Thanks to Funejoy for sending me this product and sponsoring this post, which means they paid me to write an honest review. All views, as always, are mine.