- All sections are ordered alphabetically by title.
- Books I have read are are marked by a tick (√.) Any I haven’t read are endorsed by reviewers and/or other sex educators.
- Books I particularly love are marked by a little heart (❤️)
- I am aware this is only a small cross section of the available material. If there’s a text you love that isn’t on this list, or you have a compelling argument for one of the listed texts to be removed, just drop me a line and let me know.
- Linked books are affiliate links, FYI.
BDSM – Theory
- Domination & Submission: The BDSM Relationship Handbook (Michael Makai)
- Power Circuits: Polyamory in a Power Dynamic (Raven Kaldera)
- Sacred Kink: The Eightfold Paths of BDSM & Beyond (Lee Harrington)
- Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns (Miller & Devon) √
- The Control Book (Peter Masters)
- The Loving Dominant (John Warren)
- The S&M Feminist (Clarisse Thorne) √
- The Ultimate Guide to Kink (Tristan Taormino) √❤️
- Wild Side Sex: The Book of Kink (Midori)
BDSM – Good for Beginners
- 50 Shades of Kink: An Introduction to BDSM (Tristan Taormino)
- 150 Shades of Play: A Beginner’s Guide to Kink (Em & Lo)
- How to Be Kinky: A Beginner’s Guide to BDSM (Morpheus)
- Playing Well With Others (Mollena Williams-Haas & Lee Harrington)
- SM-101: A Realistic Introduction (Jay Wiseman)
- The Kinky Girl’s Guide to Dating (Luna Grey) √
- The New Bottoming Book (Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy) √❤️
- The New Topping Book (Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy) √❤️
- The Ultimate Guide to Kink (Tristan Taormino) √❤️
BDSM – Impact Play
- Flogging (Joseph W Bean)
- Hot Crossed Buns: A Beginner’s Guide to Spanking (Tasha Lee)
- The Toybag Guide to Canes & Caning (Janet W Hardy)
BDSM – Rope
- Erotic Bondage Handbook (Jay Wiseman)
- Midori’s Expert Guide to Sensual Bondage (Midori)
- Shibari You Can Use & More Shibari You Can Use (Lee Harrington)
- Showing You the Ropes & Back on the Ropes (Two Knotty Boys) √
- The Little Guide to Getting Tied Up (Evie Vane)
- The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage (Midori)
- The Toybag Guide to Basic Rope Bondage (Jay Wiseman)
BDSM – Power Exchange
BDSM – FemDom
- A Keyholder’s Handbook:A Woman’s Guide to Male Chastity (Georgia Ivey Green)
- Male Chastity: A Guide for Keyholders (Lucy Fairbourne)
- The Mistress Manual (Mistress Lorelei)
- The Sexually Dominant Woman: A Workbook for Nervous Beginners (Lady Green) √
BDSM – Other Practical Skills Guides
- 21st Century Kinkycrafts (Janet W Hardy)
- Fantasy Made Flesh: The Essential Guide to Erotic Roleplay (Deborah Addington)
- The Human Pony: A Handbook for Owners, Trainers & Admirers (Rebecca Wilcox)
- The Toybag Guide to Age Play (Lee Harrington)
- The Toybag Guide to Chastity Play (Mistress Simone)
- The Toybag Guide to Clips & Clamps (Jack Rinella)
- The Toybag Guide to Dungeon Emergencies & Supplies (Jay Wiseman)
- The Toybag Guide to Erotic Knifeplay (Miranda Austen)
- The Toybag Guide to Foot & Shoe Worship (Midori)
- The Toybag Guide to High Tech Toys (John Warren)
- The Toybag Guide to Hot Wax & Temperature Play (Spectrum)
- The Toybag Guide to Medical Play (Tempest)
- The Toybag Guide to Playing With Taboo (Mollena Williams)
Sex & Science
- Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science & Sex (Mary Roach)
- Come As You Are (Emily Nagoski, PhD) √❤️
- Mating in Captivity: Sex, Lies & Domestic Bliss (Esther Perel)
- Sex At Dawn (Christopher Ryan & Cacilda Jetha)
- The Myth of Sex Addiction (Dr David Ley)
Sex – History & Culture
- Buzz: A Stimulating History of the Sex Toy (Hallie Lieberman) √
- Vibrator Nation: How Feminist Sex-Toy Stores Changed the Business of Pleasure (Lynn Comella) √❤️
- Unscrewed: Women, Sex, Power, and How to Stop Letting the System Screw Us All (Jaclyn Friedman) √❤️
- Fucked: Being Sexually Explorative and Self-Confident in a World That’s Screwed (Corrine Fisher & Krystyna Hutchinson)
Sex-General
- (B Clement PhD & M Clement PhD)
- Big Big Love: A Sex & Relationships Guide for People of Size (Hanne Black)
- Enjoy Sex: How, When and IF You Want To (Meg-John Barker & Justin Hancock)
- Expanded Orgasm (Patricia Taylor, PhD)
- Great Sex for Moms: Nurturing Passion While Raising Kids (Valerie Davis Raskin)
- The Sex Myth: Why Everything We’re Told Is Wrong (Dr Brooke Magnanti)
- The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex (Cathy Winks)
- The Modern Kama Sutra (Kamini & Kirk Thomas)
- Red Hot Touch: A Head-to-Toe Handbook for Mindblowing Orgasms (J & J Hanauer)
- The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability (Kaufman, Silverberg & Odette)
Sex – For Couples
-
- Daily Sex: 365 Positions & Activities (Jane Seddon)
- Hot Sex (Tracey Cox)
- Kama Sutra: A New Guide to Ancient Arts of Love (Anne Hooper)
- Kama Sutra Pocket Sex Guide (Quiver)
- Kama Sutra Workout – 300 Sensual Exercises (Lovehoney)
- Position of the Day: Sex Every Day in Every Way (Nerve.com)
- Position Sex Bible (Randi Foxx)
- Ride ‘Em Cowgirl! Sex Position Secrets for Better Bucking (Dr Sadie Allison)
- Ultimate Erotic Massage (Kavida Rei)
Sex & Aging
- Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After 60 (Joan Price)
- Naked At Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex (Joan Price)
- Sex Over 50 (Joel D Black, PhD)
Sex – Anal
- Anal Pleasure & Health (Jack Morin)
- Anal Sex Basics (Carlyle Jansen)
- The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men (Bill Brent)
- The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women (Tristan Taormino) √
- Tickle My Tush: Mild to Wild Anal Adventures for Everybooty (Dr Sadie Allison)
Sex – Female Pleasure
- Becoming Cliterate (Dr Laurie Mintz)
- Female Ejaculation & the G-Spot (Deborah Sundahl)
- Oral Sex Pocket Guide (Quiver)
- Oral Sex She’ll Never Forget (Sonia Borg, PhD)
- Orgasm Pocket Sex Guide (Quiver)
- The Clitoral Truth: The Secret World at Your Fingertips (Rebecca Chalkner)
- The Good Vibrations Guide to the G-Spot (Cathy Winks)
- The Lowdown on Going Down: How to Give Her Mindblowing Oral Sex (Marcy Michaels)
Sex – Male Pleasure
- Blow Him Away: How to Give Him Mindblowing Oral Sex (Marcy Michaels)
- Oral Sex He’ll Never Forget (Sonia Borg, PhD)
- Penis Genuis Pocket Sex Guide (Quiver)
- Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-On Guide to Penis Pleasing (Dr Sadie Allison)
Sex – Lesbian/FF
- Girl Sex 101 (Allison Moon)
- Lesbian Sex Positions (Shanna Katz)
- The Whole Lesbian Sex Book (Felice Newman)
Sex & Spirituality
- Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the 21st Century (Barbara Carellas)
- Radical Ecstasy (Dossie Easton)
Sex – Toys & Masturbation
- Sex For One: The Joy of Selfloving (Betty Dodson)
- Sex Yourself: The Woman’s Guide to Mastering Masturbation (Carlyle Jansen)
- The Adventurous Couples’ Guide to Strap-On Play (Violet Blue)
- The Big Book of Sex Toys (Tristan Taormino)
Polyamory, Swinging and Ethical Non-Monogamy
- 8 Things I Wish I’d Known About Polyamory (Cunning Minx) √
- Ask Me About Polyamory: The Best of Kimchi Cuddles (Tikva Wolf) √
- Love in Abundance: A Counselor’s Advice on Open Relationships (Kathy Labriola)
- More Than Two (Franklin Veaux & Eve Rickert) √
- Opening Up (Tristan Taormino) √❤️
- Pagan Polyamory (Raven Kaldera)
- Polyamory in the 21st Century (Dr Deborah Anapol)
- Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits (Dr Deborah Anapol) √
- Redefining Our Relationships (Wendy O Matik)
- Rewriting The Rules (Meg-John Barker)
- Stories from the Polycule: Real Life Polyamorous Families (Dr Elisabeth Sheff)
- The Ethical Slut (Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy) √
- The Jealousy Workbook (Kathy Labriola)
- The Myth of Monogamy (David Philip Barash)
- The Polyamorists Next Door (Dr Elisabeth Sheff)
- The Smart Girl’s Guide to Polyamory (Dedeker Winston) √
- When Someone You Love is Polyamorous (Dr Elisabeth Sheff)
Feminism
- 50 Shades of Feminism (ed. Lisa Appignanesi, Susie Orbach, Rachel Holmes) √❤️
- Against Our Will: Men, Women & Rape (Susan Brownmiller)
- Ain’t I A Woman: Black Women & Feminism (bell hooks)
- A Room of One’s Own (Virginia Woolf)
- Bad Feminist (Roxane Gay) √
- Bitch: In Praise of Difficult Women (Elizabeth Wurtzel)
- Cinderella Ate My Daughter (Peggy Orenstein) √
- Colonise This! Young Women of Colour on Today’s Feminism (Daisy Hernandez)
- Cunt: A Declaration of Independence (Inga Muscio)
- Delusions of Gender (Cordelia Fine)
- Enlightened Sexism (Susan Douglas)
- Excluded: Making Feminist & Queer Movements More Inclusive (Julie Serano)
- Fat is a Feminist Issue (Susie Orbach)
- Feminism is For Everybody: Passionate Politics (bell hooks)
- Full Frontal Feminism (Jessica Valenti)
- Girl Up (Laura Bates) √
- He’s a Stud, She’s a Slut, and 49 Other Double Standards (Jessica Valenti)
- I Call Myself a Feminist (ed. Victoria Pepe, Rachel Holmes et al.) √
- I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings (Maya Angelou)
- Living Dolls: The Return of Sexism (Natasha Walter) √
- Men Explain Things To Me and Other Essays (Rebecca Solnit) √
- Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters (Courtney E Martin) √
- Sister Outsider (Audre Lorde)
- The Beauty Myth (Naomi Wolf)
- The Means of Reproduction: Sex Power & the Future of the World (Michelle Goldberg)
- The Purity Myth (Jessica Valenti) √❤️
- We Should All By Feminists (Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie)
- Women Who Run With the Wolves (Clarissa Pinkola Estes)
- Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power & a World Without Rape (Jaclyn Friedman)
LGBTQ+ Issues
- Bi Any Other Name (ed. Lorraine Hutchins & Lani Kaahumanu) √
- Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women & the Rest of Us (Kate Bornstein)
- I Promised Not to Tell: Raising a Transgender Child (Cheryl B Evans)
- Nobody Passes: Rejecting the Rules of Gender & Conformity (Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore)
- Outlaw Marriages: The Hidden Histories of Same-Sex Couples (Rodger Streitmatter)
- Purple Prose: Bisexuality in Britain (ed. Kate Harrad) √❤️
- Queer: A Graphic History (Meg-John Barker & Julia Scheele)
- Redefining Realness (Janet Mock)
- The Letter Q: Queer Writers’ Notes to Their Younger Selves (ed. Sarah Moon)
- Traversing Gender: Understanding Transgender Realities (Lee Harrington)
- Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism & the Scapegoating of Femininity (Julie Serano)
Pornography
- Ethical Porn for Dicks: A Man’s Guide to Responsible Viewing Pleasure (Dr David Ley)
My Favourite Erotic Fiction
- Sleeping Beauty series – Claiming, Kingdom, Punishment, Release (Anne Rice as A N Roquelaire) √
- The Marketplace series (Laura Antoniou) √❤️
- A Life Less Monogamous (Cooper S Beckett) √❤️
- Approaching the Swingularity (Cooper S Beckett) √❤️
- Come Again: Sex Toy Erotica (Rachel Kramer Bussel)
My Favourite Sexy/Sex-Related Memoirs
- Call Me Elizabeth (Dawn Annandale) √
- The Husband Swap (Louisa Leontiades) √
- The Intimate Adventures & Further Adventures of a London Call Girl (Belle de Jour) √
- How a Bad Girl Fell in Love (Girl On The Net) √❤️
- My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging and Polyamory (Cooper S Beckett) √
- Open (Jenny Block) √
- The Game Changer (Franklin Veaux) √
- True Lust (Tristan Taormino) √
- Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal? (Jeanette Winterson) √
And Some Randoms That Don’t Fit Anywhere Else!
- Love You Two [Fiction] (Maria Pallotta-Chiarolli) √
- The Big Book of Domination [Erotic Fiction] (D.L. King)
- Twice The Pleasure: Bisexual Women’s Erotica (Rachel Kramer Bussel)
- On Starry Thighs: Sacred & Sensual Poetry (Lee Harrington)
- The Killer Wore Leather [Fiction] (Laura Antoniou)
- Trauma & Recovery (Judith Herman) √
- The Five Love Languages (Gary Chapman)