Who am I?
Hello! I’m Amy Norton (she/her). I am, in no particular order, a sex blogger, a digital sexuality journalist, an erotica author, an adult product reviewer, a sex educator, and a community organiser.
I’m a 30-something queer, cis woman. I’m based in the UK where I live with my nesting partner, Mr CK (he/him). Some words I use to describe myself include #Sparklefemme, polyamorous, a crap swinger, an ethical slut, an intersectional feminist, a survivor, and a very-occasionally-switchy submissive.
I like my sex like I like my coffee: hot and several times a day.
Why a sex blog?
Because I find sexuality endlessly fascinating and I am firmly convinced that sex has the power to change the world. The sex education most of us receive is woefully lacking, if we get any at all, which means we have millions of adults who don’t understand their bodies and live under the weight of massive and needless sexual shame.
I want people to talk openly about sex. I want accurate, pleasure-focused information for everyone, and I want informed, enthusiastic consent to become a minimum standard. Coffee & Kink is my small attempt at being that change.
I can’t imagine ever running out of things to say about sex. Back in late 2016, my writing was getting some attention over on Fetlife, so I thought, hey, looks like some people actually care what I have to say! I opened up a free WordPress account, and Coffee & Kink was born.
I thought it might be a fun writing exercise and that a few people might read it. What I did not expect was that the site would explode in popularity, that people would give me money to write about sex, or that it would help me quit my day job to be a full time writer. But here we are! It’s been almost five years at the time of revamping this page, and this whole experience is still kind of bonkers to me.
What to expect here
You’ll find reviews of sex toys, books, BDSM gear, and more. You’ll find articles, personal essays and opinion pieces on all aspects of sexuality and relationships, with somewhat of a focus on BDSM and consensual non-monogamy. There will be occasional personal stories from my own sex and love life, as well as erotic fiction and guest posts from carefully selected writers.
Coffee & Kink is set up to be an accessible and inclusive space for people to read, learn, expand their horizons and start having conversations. I run this space on an explicitly intersectional feminist ethos with consent, pleasure, equality, education, and safety as my guiding values.
Respectful debate and discussion is encouraged, but bigotry will not be tolerated. I have a zero-tolerance policy for misogyny, racism, homophobia, biphobia, transphobia, classism, ableism, kink shaming, and body shaming. I moderate all comments and will not allow hateful ones through, and I will block repeat offenders. Basically, don’t be a dick.
Again, this is an 18+ space. If you are under legal age to access adult materials where you live, then please leave now. You can find accurate information about sex and relationships at Scarleteen or Bish.
Where to start?
If you’re new to all this and just doing your research, try the Good for Beginners category.
If you’re looking for your next sex toy purchase, check out my toy reviews.
Want more recommendations for awesome blogs and books you should be reading? Check out The Bookshelf and Resources.
If you’re a social media person, feel free to connect with me on Twitter or send me a friend request on Fetlife (no message required, but feel free to send one if you have a question, some feedback, or just want to say hi and/or tell me I’m amazing). I hate Facebook, I don’t trust the privacy settings on Instagram, I am way too old for Snapchat, and I really don’t understand what the fuck TikTok is. So Twitter and Fetlife are where I live.
If you want to work with me, check out this page or drop me an email.
If my work is valuable to you and you’d like to support me, please consider buying me a coffee.
If you like smut and good causes, check out Smutathon, a charity sex writing challenge I founded and that has raised around £10,000 for various organisations since 2017.
And finally, to dive in wherever fate takes you, try today’s ‘Random Post’ in the right hand sidebar.
I invite you to brew yourself a hot cup of coffee (or whatever your poison is), open your mind, read around, explore, and enjoy.
Amy x
The Coffee & Kink logo and illustrations are by Charlotte Willcox, an amazing feminist artist who you should hire for all your graphic design needs!