valentine's day Archives

One of the fun things about being both a femme and a sex blogger at this time of year is seeing all the sweet, cutesy, pink-and-hearts-and-flowers themed products that companies are putting out for Valentine’s Day. Bijoux Indiscrets were kind enough to send me this year’s Valentine’s offering from their range: the Bubblegum Play Kit which includes a lube, a massage oil, and a lipgloss.

Bijoux Indiscrets Bubblegum Play Kit: Lube, Massage Oil and Lipgloss

The Bubblegum Play Kit contains three products: a warming massage oil, a full-body massage gel that doubles as a water-based lube, and a lipgloss. Each one is scented and flavoured like bubblegum. All three products, like everything in Bijoux’s range, are vegan.

The kit came packaged in a cute pink box with a heart on the front, much like the packaging you might get on a gift set of cosmetics or bath products. The overall effect, like the products themselves, is sweet to the point of saccharine. But how did the contents stack up? Let’s take a closer look at each item.

Warming Massage Oil

This isn’t really an oil in the true sense of the word. As far as I can tell, it doesn’t actually contain any oil at all. It’s really a water-based gel that warms as you massage it in. Still, we’ll call it “massage oil” to distinguish it from the other massage product in this kit.

For me, it takes about a minute to feel the massage oil warming on my skin. You’ll get a more intense warming sensation if you blow gently on it.

I found that the bubblegum massage oil didn’t really blend or get fully absorbed into the skin the way some oils and lubes do. Instead, it tends to linger on the surface. This can be a good thing, as a little bit goes a long way and there’s no need to keep reapplying it. However, it can also be a problem if you don’t enjoy the feeling of having oil or gel lingering on your skin.

This is by far the nicest tasting of the three products. It’s very, very, very sweet, so you’ll want to know that going on. That sweetness is likely due to its first ingredient: glycerin. Due to the glycerin, I found that my hands and skin felt quite sticky after using it and I wanted to wash it off. Glycerin is okay in a massage product in the way it wouldn’t be in a lube, but from a sensory perspective it is a downside to this bubblegum massage oil.

Stickiness aside, though, this is a fine massage gel and the sweet bubblegum taste and pink aesthetic gives it a fun and playful vibe.

You can buy this oil separately for €22/£20. It’s also available in caramel & sea salt and strawberry & honey flavours.

Full Body Bubblegum Massage Gel/Lube

Bijoux Indiscrets bubblegum massage gel/lube

According to Bijoux Indiscrets, this bubblegum flavoured water-based massage gel can double up as an intimate lube. It has quite a long list of ingredients, so you’ll want to review it carefully to make sure there’s nothing you’re sensitive to.

I can’t see anything alarming in the ingredients, but I’m also not enough of an expert to declare them all definitely fine. At the very least this bubblegum gel/lube contains no glycerin or parabens, though it does contain “Aroma” (artificial fragrance/flavour) which is not very specific and can include any number of things.

I do quite like the feeling of this one. It’s somewhere between a thick liquid and a thin gel, and it spreads across the skin nicely and lasts well. However, unlike the massage oil, this gel tastes really unpleasant to me. Instead of sweetness, it’s got a horrible chemical-y taste. I’m quite sensitive to artificial sweeteners and I can really, really taste them in this.

I probably won’t finish this one, honestly. I’m “meh” on flavoured lubes at best to begin with and this isn’t a nice tasting one.

Oral Pleasure Lip Gloss

This lip gloss is more subtly flavoured than the lube and massage oil, but still has a distinctive bubblegum flavour.

After you apply it, you start getting a tingling sensation thanks to the peppermint oil it contains. I think, based on the name, the idea is that you put it on and then perform oral sex with it. I haven’t had the opportunity to try that but I did try putting a bit on my vulva, just to see what the effect would be. It gave a kinda pleasurable tingly, warming feeling a bit like a warming lube or menthol pleasure balm. So that effect might translate if you used it during oral?

The warming and tingling is really noticeable on my lips, to the point that it becomes uncomfortable if I use too much. You really only need a little bit of this one.

This lipgloss lasts well and gives a nice glossy shine. It’s a little sticky, which wasn’t a problem once it was on but made applying it with my fingers annoying. A brush or wand would be better than the pump top bottle. Neither the lube nor the lipgloss are ass aggressively sweet as the massage oil in the Bubblegum Play Kit.

Verdict

I generally liked two out of the three products in this kit and will definitely finish them, though the bubblegum lube was a miss for me. However, at €60/£54 it’s pretty pricey for what it is. For that reason I don’t think I’d buy it again.

If you have a femme in your life who really likes pink things and bubblegum, though, it could be a cute and sensual Valentine’s Day gift.

Thanks to Bijoux Indiscrets for sending me this product to review! All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Flowers and chocolates might be the most traditional tokens of love on February 14th, but have you ever thought about sex toys for Valentine’s Day gifts for your lover instead?

I love Valentine’s Day. And look, I know I probably shouldn’t. I know it’s a manufactured and over-commercialised holiday. But at the end of the day, it gives me an excuse to surprise my loved ones… and to wear a bunch of pink, girly, sparkly shit with hearts all over it. (Who am I kidding? I do that all year round.)

But if you’re looking for sexy gift ideas, should you give your partner(s) or lover(s) sex toys for Valentine’s Day?

Sex Toy Gifts: Yay or Nay?

I’m going to say yes… with caveats.

First of all, please only even think about doing this for established sexual partners[*]. Giving your sweetie a vibrator can be cute and flirtatious. Giving one to your office crush (or – and I swear to God I saw this happen once – putting one in the office Secret Santa) is ~~creepy as fuck~~ sexual harassment.

In the right context, I think sex toys can be fabulous gifts. And the right context for that is:

You’re in some kind of established sexual relationship with the person[*]
You have checked in and established that sexualised gifts are welcome
You know they either like sex toys or are interested in trying them
You have a good enough understanding of their needs, likes, dislikes, preferences, and fantasies to pick out something with reasonable certainty that they’ll like it

If all of those things are true? Read on.

[*] There are very occasional exceptions to this, in that some non-sexual friendships are close and intimate enough that this wouldn’t be weird. There are definitely friends in my life I’d buy sex toys for and vice versa. But if you’re not extremely certain that this is the kind of friendship you have, you probably don’t. If in doubt, err on the side of getting them something safer.

Buying Sex Toys for Valentine’s Day: How to Do It Right

So you’ve decided that you do want to buy your partner, sweetie, or lover a sex toy for Valentine’s Day. How do you know what to choose? With so many thousands of products out there, all of them promising orgasms for days, which one should you buy for your sexy someone? These are a few of my simple shopping tips.

Tap Into What You Know About Their Preferences

Does your partner enjoy penetration, and if so do they prefer large or small insertables? Are they more into girth or length? Does she need really intense clitoral stimulation to get off? Are they all about their cock, or super into anal play? Do they love dual stimulation of two or more erogenous zones at once, or prefer to focus on one thing at a time? You need to know these sorts of basic things about your lover’s body and sexual preferences before you can successfully buy them a toy.

Aesthetic preferences matter for a lot of people, too. Would your partner like a realistic dildo, or is something colourful and sparkly more their vibe? How do they feel about fantasy aesthetics? Some people love pink, others hate it.

This stuff isn’t that hard to learn when you’re in an intimate relationship with someone. You just need to be paying attention and asking the right questions.

Finally, don’t forget about the practicalities of the toy you’re thinking of buying. They probably wouldn’t thank you for a 42lb sex doll if they live in a tiny apartment or a vibrator that sounds like a plane taking off (or a lawnmower) if they have nosy roommates.

Their Preferences, Not Yours

If there’s one mistake that I see people make more than any other when choosing sex toys for Valentine’s Day or any other gifting occasion, it’s this: instead of buying something their partner will love, they buy something they like the idea of their partner using.

There’s no point buying them a super large or extra-long dildo if they’re all about clitoral stimulation. You might like the idea of anal sex, but if they’re not into it then even the best butt plugs aren’t going to see any action. Perhaps tentacles turn you on but turn them right off.

This is a gift for them, so centre them and their needs.

Ask For Advice

People who work in adult retail and the sex toy industry are generally pretty knowledgeable. Why not go into your local sex toy shop or get in touch with your favourite retailer and ask for some buying guidance?

You’ll need to put in the work here. “What toy should I buy for my husband?” or “what are the best toys for women?” is far too vague for you to get any useful information. But narrow it down a bit and say something like, “I’m looking for a non-realistic insertable toy that also has powerful vibrations”, and you’ll get somewhere useful.

Hell, if you want, contact me and tell me a little about your budget, your needs, and the person you’re shopping for and I’ll send you a free recommendation (buying me a coffee to say thanks or shopping with my affiliate links is highly appreciated but not mandatory!)

If In Doubt, Ask

You can simply ask your partner overtly, if you want. “I was thinking I’d love to buy you a new sex toy for Valentine’s Day. Would you be into that? Is there anything you’ve got your eye on?” A lot of people would happily sacrifice the surprise element in exchange for giving or receiving the ideal gift.

Of course, you might want the gift to be a surprise. If so, you’ll have to do some subtler sleuthing. Bring up the idea of toys when the two of you are talking about fantasies, desires, and new things to try. If you ever browse sex shops together or look at toys online, see what sorts of things they gravitate towards.

Still Not Sure? Get a Gift Card.

Most sex shops, both brick-and-mortar and online, sell gift cards. If you’re not sure what your partner would like, a voucher for a reputable sex shop is a great way to give them the gift of sex toys for Valentine’s Day without having to guess.

This way, they can go and pick something out solo or you can make it a fun and sexy date activity.

If you’re looking for a sexy gift you can enjoy together that’s not a toy, something like couples’ chocolate is a great option. It’s an experience and a physical present all in one.

Pro Tip: Proceed With Caution with Prepackaged “Gift Bundles”

When I wrote an earlier draft of this post, I told people looking to buy sex toys for Valentine’s Day that they should skip bundles and kits altogether. Happily, these seem to have generally improved in the last few years so I’m updating this post to say that you don’t necessarily need to avoid them. They can offer variety and value for money. However, I still say you should proceed carefully.

A sex toy kit can be a good choice if you’re new to toys and not sure what to pick, or if you happen to be after two or more things and can find them bundled together. If you and your partner are curious about or new to BDSM, a BDSM starter kit can be a fun, sexy gift to start off your explorations together.

If you’re choosing a product bundle or sex toy kit, make sure that everything in it is body-safe. Avoid toxic materials and choose only body-safe options like silicone, stainless steel, or glass. Compare prices, too, to make sure you’re actually getting a good deal.

One Final Word of Caution on Buying Sex Toys for Valentine’s Day

Please, please, please don’t buy sex toys or kink gear from places like Amazon, Shein, Temu, and so on. You have almost no way of being sure that what you’re getting is genuine, and chances are high that it isn’t. In a broadly unregulated industry, there is no way to know what that $5 vibrator is made of but it probably isn’t anything good. And many unscrupulous companies ramp up their marketing of adult products on these sites around this time of year.

Also those companies commit gross labour rights violations (including the use of forced and child labour) and are killing the planet. So, you know, there’s that.

Some reputable companies do, unfortunately, insist on operating Amazon storefronts. But in general, the risk of getting an unsafe knock-off is so high that it’s just not worth it. Instead, visit your local women-owned or queer-owned sex shop, or check out the stores I recommend in the sidebar.

Affiliate links appear in this post. All opinions are, as always, my own!

Tag: valentine’s day

[Lube, Cosmetics & Massage Products Review] Bijoux Indiscrets Bubblegum Play Kit