[Toy Review] Satisfyer Wand-er Woman

Satisfyer started out making pressure wave toys, bringing products like the excellent Satisfyer Pro 2 and the famously adorable Pro Penguin to market. After that, they branched out into vibrators, some of which I loved and some of which were just okay. So I suppose it was inevitable they’d make a wand eventually.

The good folks at EroticFeel, an online sex shop selling an extensive range of products from sex toys and lingerie to BDSM gear, were kind enough to send me the Satisfyer Wand-er Woman to try out.

Wand-erful First Impressions?

The Wand-er Woman arrived discreetly in plain packaging and inside, the toy was presented in an attractive blue/pink/purple box with information about the toy and line drawings of nude women. I have to say that I don’t like this product’s name. It’s a cute pun, sure, but it’s really unnecessarily gendered since wand vibrators are for everyone.

Satisfyer Wand-er Woman wand vibrator

My other first impression of the Satisfyer Wand-er Woman is that it’s LARGE. Measuring 34cm (13.4″) in length and weighing in at 647g, this is not a small toy. I’m not necessarily opposed to large toys, but they can be challenging to hold and manipulate and are inaccessible for some people. I actually found the thickness of the Wand-er Woman’s handle to be more of a problem than its weight alone. I have fairly small hands, but the thickness of this toy’s handle combined with its weight made it challenging to hold for long enough to have a decent play session with it.

Woman holding magic wand vibrator by Satisfyer

The Wand-er Woman is available in three colourways: black, white, or purple. I received the white version, which has lilac buttons and a silver decorative bad at the top of the handle. The Wand-er Woman is rechargeable via the included cable, and completely waterproof. The body and head are coated in soft, body-safe matte silicone and the silicone cap is removeable from the head, which allows for easier cleaning.

In Use

The Wand-er Woman boasts ten vibration settings (constant vibration plus 9 patterns) and 5 speeds, for an impressive total of 50 possible combinations. The three-button interface is simple and intuitive, and the buttons are easy to press. I appreciated being able to scroll through the speeds by simply holding the plus or minus buttons down, without needing to press repeatedly. The Wand-er Woman’s neck has a little flex, which is useful for positioning.

Satisfyer Wand-er Woman magic wand vibrator buttons

The Wand-er Woman is not quite as powerful, nor as rumbly, as many of the corded wands in my collection. It doesn’t deliver the eyeball-shaking, whole-room-rattling intensity of some of my all-time faves. It also doesn’t quite match up in terms of deep, penetrating rumbles.

Satisfyer Wand-er Woman wand vibrator

That’s not to say it isn’t powerful, though! All but the most discerning Power Royalty will still be able to get plenty of pleasure out of this toy. It’s not exactly buzzy, either, just… somewhere closer to the centre of the buzz/rumble spectrum. I need the highest setting to get off, but not everyone’s clit is as demanding as mine. I also don’t particularly care for patterns – I tried them all for the sake of being thorough, and because I keep hoping to meet a vibration pattern that changes my mind about vibration patterns, though I haven’t yet.

The cordless design is useful, as I don’t always wand power cords trailing across my bedroom (and, in environments like play parties, there isn’t always an outlet available). The battery life is good. Noise-wise, it’s fine. Interestingly, I’ve seen some users complain of their Wand-er Woman being excessively loud, but mine just makes a persistent hum at the kind of volume you’d expect for a toy at this power level. It’s not silent but it doesn’t sound like a power tool, either.

Verdict

One of the key selling points of the Satisfyer Wand-er Woman is its relatively affordable price point. Retailing for £44.95 at full price, it’s less than half the price of many of its main competitors. If you’re willing to cope with the downsides, such as the toy’s weight and the width of the handle, and you’re not expecting the same power you’d get from a pricy corded toy, it’s a perfectly fine option. Folks on a budget, or beginners wanting to try out wands without splashing out £100 or more immediately, might find it’s perfectly adequate for their needs.

I don’t think I’ll be reaching for it regularly, but I’m glad it exists!

Thanks to EroticFeel for sending me this product to review. All views are, as ever, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Black Friday Sex Toys, Lingerie, and More: All the Best Deals

Looking for the best Black Friday sex toys deals? You’ve come to the right place! In this thread, I’ve put together a rundown of the best deals from the companies I’ve partnered with (plus a couple I have no affiliation with just because they do beautiful things!)

DISCLAIMER! Unless specified otherwise, links in this post are affiliate links and buying through them will send me a small commission at no extra cost to you. Please note that I have a policy of only promoting body-safe products and only recommending items that I have actually tried and actually love (or, in the case of toys for penises, that I have had recommended by folks I trust).

You can also follow along with my deal-of-the-hour tweet storm over at #CoffeeKinkBlackFriday. Retweeting and signal boosting really helps, even if you’re not buying for yourself this time.

Right. Let’s go, shall we?

Lovehoney

Lovehoney often have epic Black Friday sex toys sales, and this year is no exception. There’s up to 60% off selected sex toys, lingerie, lubes and better sex products, and kink gear.

You can also use my code coffkink10 at checkout to get an additional 10% off your entire order.

My top picks:

Godemiche

Everyone’s favourite purveyors of beautiful, colourful sex toys have actually got two Black Friday specials this year: limited edition colourways on some of their most popular toys, and huge discounted inventory drops of plugs, dildos, and gags in a wide array of colours and styles.

My top picks:

Bijoux Indiscrets

Use code BLACK25 to get 25% off all Bijoux Indiscrets products and receive a free kit including a bullet vibe, lube or massage gel, and cosmetics pouch.

My top picks:

The Pleasure Garden

Use my unique affiliate code kink20 to get 20% off all orders of £50 and above.

My top picks:

Hot Octopuss

Hot Octopuss have discounts of up to 50% on all their bestselling products.

My top picks:

Shevibe

Shevibe’s Black Friday offering consists of a site-wide discount (with a few exclusions) that increases depending on how much you spend. Use the code BEACH and you’ll get:

10% Off Orders Of $75+
15% Off Orders Of $100+
20% Off Orders Of $125+
25% Off Orders Of $350+

My top picks:

Peepshow Toys

Peepshow Toys have a massive blowout sale with up to 70% off some products, and 20-25% off sitewide (20% on purchases of $10-324, 25% on purchases of $325 or more). Discounts are applied automatically, so no need to use a code.

My top picks:

Bondara

Bondara are offering 30% off everything with the code BLACK. Be aware that they do unfortunately sell some toxic and porous toys. Never purchase toys made of jelly, gel, or mystery materials, and be very wary of porous materials such as TPE and TPR, especially for insertable toys. Look for silicone, ABS (hard) plastic, glass, or stainless steel.

My top picks:

Self & More

Self & More have a flash sale of 25% off Lelo products (I won’t use Lelo personally, but you do you!) and a smattering of other discounts available across the site.

My top picks:

Erotic Feel

Erotic Feel have numerous discounted products in their Black Friday sale, with up to 70% off some lines.

My top picks:

The Kinkery

The Kinkery, run by the wonderful Kayla and John of Loving BDSM fame, are offering 20% off all products (except gift cards) with code SPANKS21 until November 30th.

Sh! Women’s Store

Sh! have numerous discounted products in their FriYAY sale, while stocks last.

Tyes by Tara

Tyes by Tara have a sale page with several gorgeous discounted products including necktyes, niptyes, and tyecuffs.

Do you know of any other Black Friday sex toys, lingerie, BDSM, or other sexy product sales? Let me know!

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Ring “Waves” and “Bumps”

This is the second part of a two-part series on the Godemiche Grind Ring! You can read part 1 here.

In the first part of this series, I decribed the Godemiche Grind Ring as a “revelation in sensation”. Having now tried the other two textures in the range – known as “waves” and “bumps” – I’m standing by that assessment and excited to gush even more about how much I love these genuinely amazing toys.

So What is a Grind Ring, Again?

A Grind Ring is a piece of silicone shaped a bit like a pizza slice, designed to fit around the penis or dildo during penetrative sex and provide extra external stimulation to a person with a clitoris. Each Grind Ring has a raised bulge and one of four textures. It can also be used in a whole bunch of other ways: combine it with a vibrator, put it on a sex position wedge or pillow and grind against it, or use it as an accompaniment to hand sex. Or, you know, whatever other creative ideas you can come up with!

Grind Rings are body-safe and easy to clean with soap and water (or a pot of boiling water).

The Toy for Smut Writers (and Readers!)

Are you a smutty writer? Do you, like me, sometimes find yourself getting turned on by your own words? Or do you just enjoy sitting at your desk and reading filthy words? If so, consider putting the Grind Ring on your desk chair and grinding against it as you read/write. The firm surface helps to keep it in place and provide some delicious pressure. I just discovered this possibility a few days ago and I can’t get enough of it. Thank goodness I finally have curtains back up in my office…

With that said, let’s look at the two remaining Grind Ring textures that I haven’t yet talked about: “Waves” and “Bumps”.

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone sex toy in Bubbles and Waves
Feat. “Bumps” in Aquamarine and “Waves” in Pastel Pearlescent Green

Texture 3: “Waves”

Just this morning, I told Mr CK I was writing up this review, and he asked me which of the Grind Ring designs I liked best overall. After thinking about it for a moment, I declared Waves my favourite.

Godemiche Waves Grind Ring clitoral sex toy

The Waves ring was also perhaps the biggest surprise. After feeling how soft the silicone ripples are, I wasn’t sure how much I’d be able to feel them. But when I ground against them, especially when they had a firm surface underneath, they felt like a series of continuous licks from little silicone tongues. Since the waves are so close together and flex as you rub against them, it’s a continuous sensation.

If I’m aroused and using plenty of lube, I can orgasm easily just by grinding my clit into the Waves Grind Ring.

Texture 4: “Bumps”

The Bumps Grind Ring is the perfect middle ground when I want something more intense than the Bubbles but less intense than the Spikes. The bumps are quite small and quite close together so whichever way I move against them, several of them are always making contact with my clit from various angles.

Godemiche Bumps Grind Ring sex toy for clit

I like to use the Bumps ring before moving on to the Waves or Spikes. It’s just the right level of intensity for a hot warmup. With that said, I could probably come on it with some perseverance and a little time. I’ll have to try – you know, for science.

Verdict

Now that I’ve tried out all four Grind Ring textures, I’m even more impressed and maybe even a little obsessed. They’re amazingly versatile and a brilliant way to experiment with different sensations to see what works for you.

If you have a clitoris, I can’t recommend Grind Rings highly enough. If you’ve tried them, which texture was your favourite?

Grind Rings retail for £34.99 each.

Also: there’s a new texture out! “Pyramid Spikes” has just hit the Godemiche website. If I can get hold of one, I’ll report back with a review. Stay tuned…

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me four Grind Rings in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post and if you use them, I make a small commission. All commissions help me to keep C&K going!

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Ring “Bubbles” and “Spikes”

This is the first post in a two-part series. Since the Grind Rings come in four different textures (and I hear there may be others in the works), I decided to review them in two sets of two rather than one epic post.

In their Twitter bio, Godemiche – the UK toy company made up of powerhouse married duo Adam and Monika – state that their goal is “not to break the mold, but recolour it.” I firmly believe that their Ambit is the most perfect dildo I have ever encountered, and their array of body-safe dildos, plugs, strokers, and gags are available in a dizzying array of colours and combinations. But despite this stated aim, their latest product, the Grind Ring, really does break a few molds.

In a world of endless knock-offs and derivatives, it is so refreshing when I see sex toy designers doing something genuinely new and innovative. And I have never come across anything quite like the Grind Ring before.

But what is a Grind Ring, how does it work, and – most importantly – is it good?

What is the Godemiche Grind Ring?

The Grind Ring is a toy (or actually a series of toys) designed for folks who enjoy clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex.

Godemiche describe it thus: The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding, dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

And yeah, that’s a pretty perfect description. Here’s what they look like:

Two Godemiche Grind Ring silicone sex toys

Since I typically default to getting everything in purple when I’m choosing sex toys, I decided to go for something a bit different this time. Pictured above are the Bubbles ring in Reefs Water, and the Spikes ring in Dragon’s Breath. The colours are as gorgeously vibrant as ever, and the silicone has this lovely marbled swirly effect that’s just so, so pretty:

Back of Godemiche Grind Ring clitoral stimulators showing pretty marbled silicone pattern

So How Does it Work?

Like the dutiful sex toy testers we are, my partner Mr CK and I initially tested the Grind Ring in the way it was intended to be used. After trying a few different positions, we concluded that by far the most effective way to use this toy was the me-on-top position. This meant I could effectively grind my vulva against the textured surface while he was inside me.

It also worked pretty well in the him-on-top position. Basically, any position that involves a lot of close, face-to-face bodily contact is probably going to work well. When we tried having sex with him standing and me lying on my back on the bed, this presented the opportunity for him to use his hand to stimulate my clit with the ring, which was also extremely fucking hot.

Since most people with vulvas need sustained clitoral stimulation to orgasm, Grind Rings are a great way to achieve that during penetrative sex (if you want to) and to experiment with different textures. While using a Grind Ring did not give me a clitoral orgasm during sex, it did up the intensity and add a whole bunch of additional hotness and pleasure to the experience.

Other Ways to Use the Grind Ring

The fun thing about sex toys is that you don’t have to just use them in the way they were originally designed to be used. Wand vibrators on penises or clitoral suckers on nipples, anyone?

The Grind Ring is no different. Girl on the Net posted a brilliant piece about using it “wrong” (there’s obviously no such thing!) and I was inspired to try her “textured Doxy wank” idea. And oof, yes, this is highly, highly recommended. I’ve also found that using the Grind Rings as an addition to hand sex, either solo or partnered, is fucking excellent. One of these and plenty of lube between my/my partner’s hand and my vulva is currently one of my favourite ways to get off.

Another option is to place the Grind Ring over a suitable firm surface, such as a couch arm, sex position wedge, or particularly firm pillow, and grind on it that way.

And don’t forget, of course, that if you or your partner don’t have a penis you can also use the Grind Ring with any dildo or strap-on.

Godemiche Ambit with Spikes Grind Ring
Feat. the Godemiche Bi Pride Ambit

Texture 1: Bubbles

The Bubbles Grind Ring looks like this:

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone clitoral stimulator in Bubbles

This was actually the first one we tried as an addition to penetrative sex. I wasn’t sure the texture would be noticeable enough to do anything but it really, really is.

Out of all the Grind Ring textures, Bubbles is by far my favourite as an addition to hand sex. It’s textured enough to offer something distinctive and different, but not so intense as to be too much. The smoothness, when coupled with plenty of lube, is divine when I or my partner rub it across my clitoral hood.

Texture 2: Spikes

The Spikes Grind Ring looks like this:

Godemiche Grind Ring clitoral stimulator in Spikes

My first thought when I saw this texture was “eek”. I know silicone is pretty soft, but even so, this looked like it might be too intense for my sensitive clit.

And it is… sometimes.

I have to be in a specific mood for the Spikes Grind Ring. And that mood is “extremely horny” and “in the mood for something so intense it’s almost too much”. It’s not painful, as the silicone is indeed very soft and squishy. It’s just… a lot. Of course, if you do find it painful, you could use it to indulge in a little consensual clitoral pain play if you like that sort of thing.

I did discover one absolutely amazing way to use this ring. If I lay it across my vulva and use a powerful vibrator over the top of it, the tips of the spikes transmit the vibrations in VERY interesting ways. You’re welcome!

Verdict

These things are a revelation in sensation, particularly the Bubbles ring. They’re effective for their intended purpose but also super versatile if you get a little creative.

Godemiche Grind Rings retail for £34.99 each and are hand-made to order in whatever combination of colour and texture you choose. Stay tuned for part 2 – “Waves” and “Bumps” – coming very soon!

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me these products in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post. If you use them to make a purchase, I’ll make a small commission at no extra cost to you. All commissions help fund C&K’s continued existence and keep me well-stocked with coffee!

Pink

When my girlfriend first asked me to fuck her with a strap-on, I wasn’t at all sure about it. I don’t consider myself dominant or toppy, and Rosie is the first AFAB person I’ve dated, so I don’t exactly have a lot of experience.

“I don’t know, babe,” I said when she brought it up. “I’m just not sure it’s really my thing.”

“No pressure,” she said. “Just let me know if you ever change your mind.” She didn’t mention it again, and over the next few months we explored all kinds of other things together. She was the first woman I went down on, the first person to fist me, and we even begun to experiment with tying each other up.

The best thing about being with Rosie was that she never pushed me to do anything I didn’t want to do. She was far more experienced than me in the beginning, and she’s filthy as hell in the best possible way, but if I wasn’t up for doing something she always dropped it immediately.

I’d half forgotten our early conversation about strap-on sex until I stumbled upon a porn scene by chance. Rosie was out for the evening and, bored and horny, I got out my favourite bullet vibrator and pulled up Crashpad Series on my laptop. After scrolling through a few scenes, looking for something that would hit the spot, one video thumbnail caught my eye. A grinning woman lay on her back, sporting a bright purple strap-on dildo, which her partner was enthusiastically sucking.

I hit play, suddenly intrigued. Truthfully, I’d never seen the appeal of strap-on sex before. The person wielding the dick couldn’t actually feel it, after all, so why not just use a dildo by hand? But now, watching this gorgeous and joyful queer porn scene, I got it. My eyes remained glued to the screen, transfixed, as the woman wearing the dildo flipped her partner over and slid it into their cunt from behind. I watched the way their bodies moved together, grinding and thrusting, my own cunt growing wet at the sound of their moans. When I switched the vibrator on and pressed it to my clit, I came in less than a minute.

“So about the strap-on thing…” I said to Rosie later, when we were curled around each other cosily in bed. She gave me a curious look but said nothing, waiting. “I think I might want to try it. I’m a little nervous, but I think it could be really hot to fuck you that way. You know, if you still want…”

She kissed me. “Yes, I still want. Are you sure?”

I nodded. “Yeah.”

“What got you curious?” she asked.

“One of the scenes on that website you sent me,” I said, a little bashful.

A smile spread over her face. “Well, okay then.”

_____________

Three days later, and we were standing together before a wall of harnesses in Rosie’s favourite feminist sex shop. It made me giggle that she was on first-name terms with half the sales staff.

“Can’t I just use your harness the first time?” I’d asked when she suggested this shopping trip. She’d showed it to me, along with the rest of her impressive sex toy collection, back at the beginning of our relationship.

“No,” she said. “Strap-ons are very personal. We need to find you one that feels like you.” I didn’t really understand what she meant, but she was the expert, so I ran with it.

“I don’t know where to start,” I said. “There are so many options.”

“Just see what speaks to you,” she said.

I ran a hand along the shelf, touching supple black leather and thick nylon straps, harnesses that looked like pairs of boxer shorts and harnesses adorned with pretty floral lace. Some of them would be quite hot on the right person, I thought, but not on me.

Then my eyes fell on it.

“Now this,” I said, gently tugging one off the rack to show Rosie, “this I could see myself wearing.” It was made of soft leather in the brightest shade of pink I’d ever seen.

My girlfriend grinned at me. “That’s just about the most femme strap-on I’ve ever seen. It’s perfect for you.”

After much deliberation, we selected a curved silicone dildo in a gorgeous, pearlescent pink-and-white swirl effect to go with the harness. On the way to the counter, Rosie also grabbed a bottle of lube. I blushed deeply as our purchases were rung up, bagged, and handed to us.

_________________

I put the harness on in the bathroom by myself, still not sure how I’d feel once it was attached to me. The bright pink leather had looked pretty under the shop lights, but how would it look on my body, in our bedroom? I slid it up over my hips and adjusted it for size, then slipped the dildo through the O-ring and secured it in place. At last, I dared to look at myself in the mirror.

I’d thought I might feel silly, or possibly sexy, or a combination of both. What I had not expected to feel was – there was only one word for it – powerful. One glance at my reflection, and I knew that the pink leather harness had been the perfect choice. Yes. I looked hot as hell, and me and my hot pink cock were going to fuck my beautiful girlfriend.

Back in the bedroom, Rosie was lying on the bed in a tank top and a pair of black knickers. When I emerged, her eyes swept over my body. There was a moment of silence while we took each other in, and then,

Fuck,” she breathed.

“You like?” I asked.

“That’s just about the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. Get over here.”

I climbed onto the bed and crawled over to my girlfriend. She sat up and I knelt, my legs straddling hers, and kissed her deeply. I broke the kiss just long enough to pull her top off over her head then, my mouth still on hers, brought my hands to her breasts. She moaned into my mouth. I kissed my way down her neck and collarbone then down her body, pausing to suck one perfect nipple and then the other. As I continued the trail of kisses down her stomach and towards her pubic mound, I stole a glance at her face. Her eyes were closed in bliss and she had a little smile on her face.

When I reached her cunt and pulled off the knickers, she was already soaking wet. My tongue found her clit, sucking it into my mouth and inhaling the scent of her from her curls of dark pubic hair. I knew from experience that giving her a clitoral orgasm was the best way to get her ready for penetrative play. Forgetting my nerves for a moment, I threw all my energy into giving her pleasure. It did not take long before she was writhing beneath me, and then I felt the telltale rush of wetness as her cunt gushed against my eager mouth.

I kissed her as she came down from her first orgasm of the night, loving the feeling of her body trembling. She knelt over me. “Can I suck your dick?” she asked. Unexpectedly, the question sent a pulse of arousal to my cunt. I nodded. Holding eye contact, she slid down and closed her lips over the strap-on dildo. She slid her beautiful mouth up and down its length, swirling her tongue around the tip and then closing a hand around the shaft, stroking and sucking and stroking and sucking. Even without being able to exactly feel what her mouth was doing to the pink and white silicone, the image was almost unbearably erotic.

“Do you want me to fuck you?” I asked her, suddenly feeling bold.

She released the dildo – my cock – from her mouth. “Please.”

I reached for the bottle of lube and added a generous amount to the dildo, which was already slick from the blow job she’d just given me. “What position do you want to be in?”

She lay down on her back, her legs parted. “Like this.”

I positioned myself over her in an approximation of the missionary position. Despite its reputation as the most vanilla of sex positions, I always thought it was deeply underrated.

“Ready?” I asked her, guiding the tip of the dildo to her entrance. She nodded with such enthusiasm it made me smile. I kissed her again and, at the same time, slid the length of the dildo into her cunt.

The gasp as I slid into her was replaced by a moan as my cock made contact with her G-spot. She wrapped her arms around me and, with her hands on my ass, pulled me against her in a steady rhythm. Her sounds and the way she moved under me were making me wetter than I could remember being in a long time.

“You’re so fucking hot,” I murmured in her ear, moving my hips in small circles against her with my cock deep inside her.

“If you keep doing that, I’m going to come,” she gasped. In answer, I ground against her harder. I watched in wonder as she began to tremble, taking in the look on her face as her orgasm rose and crashed over her. When she came, she pulled me to her and buried her face in my shoulder.

“That… was fucking incredible,” she gasped when she could speak again.

I kissed her. “You’re incredible.”

I snuggled close to my girlfriend, revelling in her body against mine, the warmth of her and the feeling of her hair tickling my nose.

“I love you,” she said.

This post was written as part of Smutathon 2021! You can check out all our work and learn more about the challenge on the Smutathon website. Please consider donating to this year’s charities, Gendered Intelligence and Trans Lifeline.

Kink in Public: Is it Okay and How Can You Do It Safely?

A lot of people have exhibitionism kinks, meaning they get off on the idea (or reality) of doing sex and/or kink things in front of other people. But is this something you can do? Is it something you should do? The short answer is yes, but you need to be careful and

Consent Matters

Consent to sex and BDSM extends to anyone who will witness it. And this means that random members of the public should not be seeing your activities, since they have not consented to do so.

In some spaces, such as swing clubs and kink dungeons, consenting to be there means consenting to see certain activities that fall within the rules of the space. So if you want to get your exhibitionist on, consider going to one of these spaces so you can do so in a safe, controlled, and consensual way with enthusiastically voyeuristic participants.

Remote Control Sex Toys

One way to play subtly in public spaces is to use wearable, remote control vibrators such as the Lovense Lush or We-Vibe toys. These toys are generally quite quiet, meaning that you can safely use them in spaces with a decent level of ambient noise. Plus if people hear something vibrating with no other context, they’ll likely assume it is a mobile phone ringing.

Obviously, you’ll need to keep your facial expressions and responses under control if you want to do this.

Check out my Lovense Ferri review, We-Vibe Chorus review, and Lovense Lush review for some inspiration for remote control sex toys you can use.

Subtle Protocols

Many kinky and D/s couples continue their dynamic in public – without violating anyone’s consent – by implementing protocols that people would not associate with kink without additional context. Easy examples include the submissive always walking on a particular side, the submissive carrying the Dominant’s belongings for them, or the submissive going to the bar to fetch the drinks as an act of service.

These are just a few ideas. Use your imagination and come up with subtle kink protocols that work for you.

Day Collars

I have mixed feelings on the subject of wearing obvious BDSM collars in public. On the one hand, we all get to wear the things we like on our own bodies, and many collars could plausibly pass for simple chokers. On the other hand, a collar can still be a fairly obvious symbol of a power exchange dynamic. You must decide for yourself where you fall on this. I used to wear my collar in public when I was in my former 24/7 relationship, but I probably wouldn’t do so now.

Fortunately, you can get subtle or completely vanilla-looking day collars. Mine used to be a bracelet with a little lock and key charm. Some look like simple necklaces. Your “day collar” can be a necklace, bracelet, ring, or something else entirely. I even know people who have a tattoo as their day collar, though obviously this requires an enormous degree of commitment and certainly!

Wear Something Your Dominant Chose

An easy way to feel submissive all day long? Ask your Dominant to choose your outfit for the day (or even an aspect of it, such as your underwear). Kayla Lords has written before about having her Dominant partner choose her panties for the day when they were long distance, and I think this is a great idea!

Receiving Tasks by Text

If you’re out and about away from your kinky partner, why not experiment with sending and receiving tasks by text (or email, messaging app, or communication system of your choice). These tasks can be sexual (“next time you go to the bathroom, take your knickers off and put them in your bag”) or completely vanilla (“drink a glass of water in the next half hour”). This is a great way to feel connected as you go about your days, and does not risk involving any non-consenting participants in your dynamic.

This post was written as part of Smutathon 2021! You can check out all our work and learn more about the challenge on the Smutathon website. Please consider donating to this year’s charities, Gendered Intelligence and Trans Lifeline.

[Toy Review] Womanizer Premium 2

Long-time readers might remember my Womanizer Premium review from way back in 2018. Well, did you know that there’s a new Womanizer clitoral stimulator on the market? Enter the new, upgraded Womanizer Premium 2.

Womanizer Premium vs. Premium 2: What’s the Difference?

Womanizer Premium 2 clit sucker

The Womanizer Premium 2 has a lot in common with the original Womanizer Premium. It’s the same size (6.5″ in length) and the same basic design and structure. It features the same tapered body, coated in silky-smooth, body-safe silicone, and the same removable nozzle.

There are two main differences, as follows:

  • The Womanizer Premium 2 offers 14 speed settings (the Premium has an already-impressive 12).
  • The “autopilot” mode has been improved and upgraded for the Premium 2.

Surprisingly, they retail for the same price: £169.99.

The Womanizer Premium 2 comes in 5 colourways. Mine is a gorgeous midnight blue with a silver accent. It is fully waterproof, and rechargeable via the included cable, with a full charge giving you over two hours of use.

What’s in the Box?

The Womanizer Premium 2 comes in beautiful, elegant packaging that is reminiscent of the sort of box high-end perfume might come in. If you’re buying the toy as a gift (or a gift to yourself), it definitely has that “luxury” feel.

In the box, alongside the stimulator, you’ll find:

  • Magnetic USB charging cable
  • Cotton storage pouch
  • An extra nozzle in a different size (you can also buy extras!)
  • A quick-start guide
  • A set of safety instructions

The inclusion of a storage bag is appreciated, and the extra nozzle (presented in a little packet rather fetchingly decorated with vulva drawings!) is a nice inclusion and a nod to the fact that bodies come in different shapes and sizes.

Womanizer Premium extra nozzles in bag with vulva drawing

Womanizer Premium 2 in Use

The Womanizer Premium 2 is a delight to handle and use. It is comfortable to hold, and the buttons are intuitively placed and easy to push. You might need to try different ways of positioning it to see what works best for your body. For me, I hold it upside down (so with the tapered end facing towards my face) to make contact with my clit from above, but some people find that the other way around, or even a side-on approach, works best. The only right way is the way that works for you!

Womanizer Premium 2 buttons

Thanks to its enormous 14 levels of power, the Womanizer Premium 2 offers very small and incremental speed increases, from the lowest purring rumble to the rip-the-orgasm-from-your-body top setting. If you’re very sensitive, this can be a good way to explore different levels of intensity without getting overstimulated. For me, the sweet spot was between about level 9 and level 13. Anything lower wasn’t intense enough, but the very top was a little too much.

No other suction toy has ever gotten me off as quickly as this one does. The first time I tested it, it took me from zero to orgasm in less than ten minutes. Subsequent attempts have more or less replicated that experience. Of course, it’s possible to drag it out by using lower settings or just backing off from the edge.

I also love Womanizer’s “Smart Silence” feature. This simply means that when the toy is on, the motor only activates when it’s actually against your body. If discretion or being able to stop your toy instantly is important to you, this is a nice feature. I just like it because it means that the toy doesn’t keep buzzing away next to me when I’m grabbing lube or finding a porn clip to watch.

The main downside of the Womanizer Premium 2 in use is that it’s a little noisy. It’s quieter than some of my power-tool mains wand vibrators, but definitely significantly louder than my trusty go-to bullet.

About that Autopilot Feature

I didn’t care for the Womanizer 2’s autopilot feature at all, and I’m afraid my assessment still stands. One of the biggest benefits of masturbation is knowing exactly what your body needs and being able to adjust accordingly. Autopilot removes that, and the result is random changes in stimulation that can seriously disrupt

When I tried the autopilot mode, I soon ended up frustrated and annoyed. I switched the toy back to manual mode as soon as I felt I’d given autopilot a fair shot for the sake of writing up this review. Is it better than the original Womanizer Premium’s autopilot feature? Yes. Do I still kind of hate it? Also yes.

Your mileage may vary, of course. If you love unpredictability and being surprised by changes in intensity, the autopilot mode may be a great feature for you. It’s not bad, it’s just not right for me.

Verdict

The Womanizer Premium was an excellent clitoral suction toy, and the Premium 2 is a worthy update to that original design. The two extra settings are much appreciated, and the autopilot is noticeably better even if I don’t actually like it.

This is a seriously pricy toy, though you do get bang for your buck (so to speak). If £169.99 is a bit steep for you, the Womanizer Classic (priced at £119.99) is a great alternative, offering the same sensations, just with fewer settings and no Smart Silence.

Thanks to Womanizer for sending me this product to review. All pictures and all views, as ever, are mine. If you buy through the affiliate links in this post, I make a small commission.

[Toy Review] Hot Octopuss Atom Plus Lux

This review has been a long time coming. For various reasons, we kept getting thwarted each time we tried to test out this toy! But better late than never, and I’m pleased to be bringing you a review of the Hot Octopuss Atom Plus Lux today.

What is the Atom Plus Lux?

The Atom Plus Lux is the newest vibrating cock ring from Hot Octopuss, London-based purveyors of innovative sex toys. It’s an upgrade on the original Hot Octopus Atom Plus, the main difference being that it now comes with a remote control.

Hot Octopuss Atom Plus Lux cock ring

The Atom Plus Lux measures 4.72″ in length and 2.36″ in total width. It is made of ultra soft and body-safe matte black silicone and adorned with plastic accents on each end, which is also where the buttons live. The top is stamped with the Hot Octopuss crown insignia.

The Atom Plus Lux contains two motors. Motor #1 is housed at the top and designed to deliver vibrations to the head and upper shaft of the penis, as well as the receptive partner’s clitoris during penetrative sex. The second motor lives in the base and, combined with the pronounced ridge, stimulates the wearer’s perineum.

Atom Plus Lux vibrating cock ring viewed from the side

The Atom Plus Lux is rechargeable via the included USB cable. Charging takes 2 hours and you get around 40 minutes’ use out of a full charge, which isn’t amazing. It is fully waterproof, should you want to use it in the bath or shower.

How powerful is it?

One thing Hot Octopuss has consistently got right is their motors. The Atom Plus Lux’s two motors are impressively powerful, certainly more so than any other vibrating cock ring I’ve tried. That said, they are a little on the buzzy side. They do not have the deep, satisfying rumbles of the “bass” motors in, say, the Jett or the Kurve.

The Atom Plus Lux offers five levels of power and five vibrating patterns. I asked Mr CK how the vibrations felt to him. His answer: “I mean, they’re fine, but they won’t get me off”. I could definitely orgasm from this toy if I used it just for clitoral stimulation, but probably not during penetrative sex (for reasons I’ll get into below).

By the way: the two motors are integrated, so you cannot control them separately.

How does it fare in use?

I am coming to the conclusion that Mr CK and I just don’t really care for vibrating cock rings all that much. The idea of them is good, but in practice they tend to be more trouble than they’re really worth.

Hot Octopuss Atom Plus Lux vibrating cock ring on Godemiche Ambit silicone dildo
Feat. Godemiche Ambit in a limited edition Valentine’s Day design.

You have to put on the Atom Plus Lux when the penis is flaccid or semi-flaccid, and it has to sit behind the testicles (we tried it first just around the penis, and it just moves around and slips off). The silicone is pretty rigid and hard to stretch for long at first, although it does loosen up a little after a few uses. That said, if you suffer from pain or muscle weakness in your hands, you may find it challenging to put on.

Part of the idea behind vibrating cock rings is that most people with vulvas need sustained clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm. The problem is that they don’t really provide that stimulation very well! While I appreciate the extra clitoral sensation that comes from using a vibrating cock ring like the Atom Plus Lux, it’s neither consistent nor sustained enough to actually get me off unless my partner just, sort of, puts his penis inside me and then doesn’t move. (Which… can be hot and is apparently a thing Mormons don’t think counts as sex, but it’s not really our thing!)

Remote control cock ring Hot Octopuss Atom Plus Lux remote

The Atom Plus Lux’s controls are easy to use, with an on/off/change pattern button located on the bottom and the speed buttons located on either side at the top. The remote control is a nice addition, as pressing buttons on the toy itself can be a little fiddly mid-fuck!

Verdict

The Atom Plus Lux is a very well-designed and well-made vibrating cock ring with two reasonably powerful motors. I don’t think we’ll be using it much, but that’s got very little to do with the product itself.

Honestly, if any toy was going to turn me into a vibrating cock ring convert, it’d be this one. Sadly, it really hasn’t, so I have to conclude they’re probably not for me.

That said, if you enjoy (or think you might enjoy) this kind of toy, the Atom Plus Lux is a good bet! Hot Octopuss’s products are well-made and built to last and, if something does go wrong, their customer service is stellar. I actually recently had an issue with a different product and they sorted it so quickly and professionally.

The Atom Plus Lux retails for £89.95 (that’s $129.95 for my American friends).

Thanks to Hot Octopuss, who sent me this product in exchange for an honest review. All views and images in this post are mine. Affiliate links are included and if you shop through them, I make a small commission at no extra cost to you.

[Review] Lovehoney “Best Sex of Your Life” Sex Toy Advent Calendar

We made it! I reviewed every single item in the Lovehoney Best Sex of Your Life advent calendar over the last 24 days. Before I call it a wrap on this project, I wanted to provide a final review where I share my thoughts on the set as a whole.

Lovehoney Best Sex of Your Life sex toy advent calendar
Image: Lovehoney

Who is the target market?

The Best Sex of Your Life advent calendar is aimed at couples, and specifically assumes a cisgender, heterosexual couple. I’m not a fan of gendered language or assumptions in sex toy marketing, since body parts don’t have inherent genders and products certainly don’t.

In the future, I’d like to see these calendars marketed according to what body parts they work with, rather than gendering things, which can be alienating for trans and non-binary people. I’d also like to see versions available for couples made up of two vulva-owners or two penis-owners.

Gendering aside, this set is very clearly designed to provide sex toys for beginners. Many of the items are super basic, which is mostly fine for its intended purpose.

What’s inside?

In case you’ve forgotten, here’s a rundown of what you’ll find in your Best Sex of Your Life sex toy advent calendar:

A mixed bag, I’m sure you’ll agree. And that’s definitely a plus. This set is aimed at people who are new to exploring sex toys and different ways to connect intimately, so offering lots of different options and ideas is a great thing.

Best and worst of

The quality of the items in this set is wildly variable. There are a few things that are genuinely great quality and will probably last many years, like the silicone toys. A few that are fine for a use or two, but won’t last long, like the strokers. Some that are fine for complete beginners but “meh” for anyone with an iota of experience, like the kink gear. And the odd one that made me go “aaaaaahhhhh, no!”

So here’s my best and worst of roundup:

Best item: This is easy – definitely the Womanizer Classic from Day #24, a genuinely excellent clitoral suction toy that retails for £119.99 by itself.

Honourable mention: The bullet vibe from Day #1. Reasonable power, versatile (it pairs well with many of the other items in this set), and rechargeable.

Worst item: That damn penis sleeve from Day #22. Unsafe, unsanitary, and just overall not something I would ever recommend anyone puts near their genitals.

Honourable mention: The wrist ties from Day #13. Not only are they glorified basic satin ribbons, they also work in a way that is very dubiously safe for any but the lightest bondage.

So is it worth it?

Whether or not this kit is worth the money very much depends on what you want to get out of it. If you’re an experienced player looking to expand your sex toy collection, skip it and get one or two really good quality toys instead (might I suggest a Doxy or a We-Vibe Tango?)

If you and your partner are brand new to toys and looking to explore some basic things together, you might get a lot out of this set. Despite the variable quality, it offers possibilities and a kind of permission to try things out. And if something doesn’t work for you? No big deal, there are 23 other things to try.

If you’re specifically after a Womanizer Classic and think you might enjoy a few of the other items too, the Best Sex of Your Life set is a no-brainer. The Womanizer costs literally the same as this entire set, so you might as well snag a bargain.

You do get £370+ worth of products for £120 (and can get a further 10% off with my code “coffkink10”). So if you think there are at least a few things you’ll enjoy, it’s a good deal.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending us the Best Sex of Your Life couples’ sex toy advent calendar to review. All views are our own. Affiliate links appear in this post and shopping through them helps to keep the site going!

Lovehoney Sex Toy Advent Calendar Door #24: Womanizer Classic

We’ve made it! I have successfully tested and reviewed every item in Lovehoney’s “Best Sex of Your Life” advent calendar. And what a ride it’s been. There will be an overview of the entire set coming out tomorrow. For now, though, it’s time to open Door #24!

Door #24: Womanizer Classic

If you were expecting something big and exciting for Day 24, Lovehoney did not disappoint! Behind Door #24 is a Womanizer Classic, one of the newer additions to the famed Womanizer line of clitoral stimulators. Let’s start with the basic rundown:

  • Material: ABS plastic body, silicone nozzle.
  • Colour: Pink body, white nozzle.
  • Body safe? Yes, completely. ABS plastic and silicone are both 100% body-friendly and non-porous.
  • Power: Rechargeable via the included magnetic cable.
  • Waterproof: Yes, submersible. Suction toys offer a very different sensation underwater, so it’s worth trying to see if it works for you.
  • Size: The body is 6″ in total length. The nozzle opening is 0.7″.
  • Lube compatible: Use water-based or oil-based lubes with this one.
  • Cleaning: Wipe the body clean with a sterile wipe. Clean the removable nozzle by boiling it or popping it into a 10% bleach solution.

The Womanizer Classic is shaped very similarly to the Womanizer Premium, which you may recall I adored. The Classic model has slightly fewer features (none of the fancy Smart Silence or Auto Pilot stuff, and only 8 speeds instead of 12). But otherwise, it’s broadly much the same.

Womanizer Classic suction sex toy for Womanizer Classic review

Most importantly, it delivers those slow-build, leg-shakingly intense orgasms I’ve come to expect from Womanizer toys.

These toys all use patented “Pleasure Air” technology. The nozzle surrounds your clit and delivers stimulation through rapid air pulses. Sound too gentle? It’s not. It’s amazing.

The Womanizer Classic has three intuitively placed buttons: an on/off, and buttons to turn the speed up or down. They’re easy to press, and they’re different sizes so you can feel for the right one without needing to break your flow to look.

The only thing to be aware of is that it’s pretty loud at the higher settings. It gets a little quieter when the nozzle has a proper seal against your body, but it’s still got a distinctive sound. I don’t really care about discretion (“Goodnight, honey, I’m going for a wank” is a commonly used sentence in my house!) but your mileage may vary.

Womanizer Classic sex toy clitoral suction vibrator

One thing to be aware of as a beginner, is that suction sex toys do take a little getting used to. The sensations are quite different to a traditional vibrating toy, and it can take practice to figure out how it works best for you. So if you don’t get on with it the first time, I recommend

Yes, the Womanizer Classic is a winner and a worthy final prize in this set! It also retails for £119.99, which – considering the Best Sex of Your Life set retails for £120 – means you’re getting a pretty incredible deal. You can also use my code “coffkink10” at checkout to get 10% off this or any other purchase at Lovehoney.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending us the Best Sex of Your Life couples’ sex toy advent calendar to review. All views are our own. Affiliate links appear in this post and shopping through them helps to keep the site going!