[Toy Review] Monster Pub Dr Whale 2

You’ve heard of rabbit vibrators. You’ve probably heard of Satisfyer’s famous Penguin clitoral suction toy. But have you ever seen a whale vibrator before? Well, now you have! Specifically, the Dr Whale vibrator, which I recently received to test and review.

Monster Pub Dr Whale 2: Basics

The Dr Whale 2 is a curved vibrator shaped like a little whale. It measures 7 inches in total when stretched out flat (4 inches insertable) and 1.3 inches in diameter at the widest point. It houses two motors, one in the whale’s “body” and one in its tail.

Monster Pub Dr Whale 2

The Dr Whale 2 is coated in soft and body-safe silicone in a pretty shade of pale blue. It is rechargeable via the included USB cable and you get 120 minutes use out of a full charge. You also get a storage bag for the toy.

Confusingly, the website says the toy is waterproof but the included instruction booklet says NOT to submerge it in water. I’m going to assume that means it’s splashproof only, though I’m not entirely sure. I didn’t want to risk breaking it by submerging it. For a toy of this price point, though, I feel like “waterproof” should come as standard.

Monster Pub Dr Whale 2

The Dr Whale 2 features an internal heating element that warms up to a comfortable 42C within a couple minutes of being switched on. Most intriguing of all, it is controllable via the Monster Pub app (available free on iOS and Android).

App-Controlled Kegel Exerciser

One of the advertised purposes of the Dr Whale 2 is as a kegel exerciser. Performing kegel exercises regularly can help strengthen your pelvic floor, which some evidence shows has a variety of benefits from better bladder control to stronger orgasms. I delved into some of the science on kegel exercises a long time ago on this blog, and anecdotal evidence seems to suggest that while using internal exercisers like the Dr Whale 2 doesn’t necessarily make the kegel exercises more effective, using one might make you more likely to perform them regularly.

I downloaded the app and the toy connected easily. The connection is good, reliable and steady as long as you have a stable internet connection.

You have to set up an account on the app, which takes a few seconds. It also asks you to select your gender, but only offers “girl” and “boy” (which is weirdly infantilising as well as annoyingly binary.)

The app then asked me to complete a “Q&A For Girls” which consists of a few questions about whether you’re using the app alone or with a lover and whether you want to share it with a partner. It also, however, includes THIS:

I strongly suspect this is just some really, really bad Google Translate but the last thing I want to see in a sex toy app is talk of being “molested”. Gross. It also gives me pause about the app’s security and safety. Is it likely that someone is going to randomly take control of my toy? Because that’s, erm, deeply concerning if so.

Once you’re in, you can choose from a range of pre-set patterns and those created by other users. You can also create your own using the “Gesture” mode, connect with a partner via chat tools such as WeChat or WhatsApp, or make the vibes respond to movement with the “Action/Reaction” mode.

If you go into the “Health” tab at the top of the screen, you’ll find the various kegel exercise section. In this mode, a voice talks you through a range of exercises. The sessions are pretty short, stating at just 3 minutes, so they’re quite accessible. If you need a little extra encouragement to do kegel exercises regularly, you might enjoy being gently talked through it by the narrator’s soothing voice. I certainly find it helps me to actually bother doing my exercises!

The app responsiveness is good. It’s also fairly intuitive to use, with just a few basic controls to get your head around.

What About as a Sex Toy?

I like the shape and flexibility of the Dr Whale 2. I also really like the gently ridged texture of the silicone on one side of the whale’s body. Its flexy tail means it will work for a variety of bodies and comfortable positioning is easy. The downside of the flexible tail is that, when you’ve inserted the toy, it’s difficult to get a satisfying amount of clitoral pressure.

Monster Pub Dr Whale 2

I’m not really a fan of internal vibrations, though, so I soon turned to using it solely as a clitoral toy.

Unfortunately, the Dr Whale 2 really falls down for me on power. It’s not the worst by any stretch, and I’ve certainly used more expensive toys that were packing less of a punch than this one. But ultimately the vibrations are of mediocre strength and very buzzy. This toy is highly unlikely to ever get me off.

Verdict

A mixed bag here.

I do think the Dr Whale 2 is a good kegel exerciser. The guided sessions on the app are a nice touch and the vibrations add more pleasure to the whole process. As a sex toy, though, I’m unlikely to ever use it again. It’s just too buzzy and not really powerful enough to be satisfying.

The Monster Pub Dr Whale 2 retails for $119.00.

This review was sponsored, meaning the company paid me to write an honest review. All views and experiences are my own.

[Toy Review] Womanizer Starlet 3

If you’ve been around for a while, you might remember my reviews of the Womanizer Starlet and Womanizer Starlet 2. I was impressed with the original Starlet, a teeny-tiny, no-frills version of Womanizer’s classic clitoral suction stimulators, and significantly less enamoured with the Starlet 2.

The latest iteration in this range, the Womanizer Starlet 3, has just hit the market. Read on to find out how I got on when Lovehoney sent me one to try.

Womanizer Starlet 3: Details

Womanizer Starlet 3 clitoral suction stimulator

The Womanizer Starlet 3 is very similar in design to the Starlet 2. I can’t take a picture of them side by side because I passed on my Starlet 2 to a friend, but as far as I can tell they’re the same size (5″ total length) and the same shape. The Starlet 3 has the same ABS plastic body and removeable silicone nozzle, and is similarly lightweight and compact.

So what’s the difference?

As far as I can tell, the biggest difference is that the Womanizer Starlet 3 has 6 speed settings. The Starlet Original and Starlet 2 each have only 4.

Womanizer Starlet clit sucking toy

The Starlet 3 comes in a couple of new colourways, including the beautiful teal green I received. I specifically requested this because I love green and it’s an unusual shade for sex toys, so I jump on it when I see it. You can also get the Starlet 3 in blue, grey, or pink.

The Starlet 3 also arrived in revamped, sustainable cardboard packaging. Manufacturers who are still using tonnes of single-use plastic, take note.

Womanizer Starlet 3 recyclable sustainable packaging

The Womanizer Starlet 3 is waterproof and USB rechargeable via the included cable. You can clean the body of the toy with a sterile wipe or warm soapy water, and remove the nozzle to sterilise it in boiling water (or the dishwasher).

Starlet 3 in Use

Since it’s the same basic shape as the Starlet 2, many of the issues I had with that product carry over to this one. Specifically, the handle is short and the nozzle only sticks out from the toy’s body about half an inch. I find this makes it incredibly difficult to get and maintain a good angle for both maximum stimulation and comfort. This is probably an issue of personal preference rather than a fundamental flaw with the product, but if it’s a problem for me it’s sure to be a problem for at least some other users. Some of Lovehoney’s on-site reviewers have noted this issue, too.

The nozzle opening is also very small, only about half an inch across at the widest point. That means it’s probably only going to work for someone with a fairly small clit. (Yes, like all other body parts, they vary in shape and size).

The Starlet 3’s controls are fine, wth +/- buttons (which are also the on/off buttons) situated on the back of the main body of the toy. The buttons are a little stiff and require quite a firm press.

Womanizer Starlet 3 buttons

My biggest issue with the Starlet 3 is its battery life. The advertised runtime of 30 minutes on a full charge is already pretty poor. It takes many people longer than that to reach orgasm! But I found that the Starlet 3’s motor became juddery and unreliable after only about 20 minutes. If I pressed it too firmly against my body, or moved too suddenly, it would suddenly reduce in intensity or cut out completely.

Utimately, the Womanizer Starlet 3 fails the “does it get me off?” test. It didn’t on any of the three occasions I tried it. The level of power isn’t bad, especially on the higher settings. I also have no complaints about the suction sensation itself. It probably could have brought me to orgasm using the top couple of speeds, if only the shape weren’t so annoying and it hadn’t died mid-session!

Interestingly, the product copy specifically states that this toy can be used for edging (getting close to orgasm then backing off), something I and many other people enjoy. And while that’s true, it’s… also sort of true for any sex toy that is capable of bringing the user to orgasm? I’m not really sure why it’s specified for this one in particular. Plus, getting edged non-consensually because the damn battery ran out isn’t my idea of a good time.

Verdict

I really wanted to like this one. I appreciate that Womanizer have tried to offer a more budget-friendly option in their range of notoriously high-priced toys. Not to mention it’s just so pretty!

But… ugh.

For a toy that retails for £69.99 ($79.99 US), the Womanizer Starlet 3 was highly disappointing and I cannot recommend it. While the issues I had with the shape are arguably a matter of preference, there’s no excuse for the terrible battery life and unreliable motor. If you’re on a budget, the Romp Switch is a better (and cheaper!) alternative. If you can afford to spend a bit more, you can’t go wrong with the Womanizer/Lovehoney Pro40.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product to review. All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Rings “Pyramids” and “Tall Pyramids”

If you’re anything like me, “spikes” probably isn’t a word you associate with something you want near your genitals. Well, the newest Grind Ring designs from Godemiche, known as “Pyramids” or “Pyramid Spikes” and “Tall Pyramids”, a variation on the popular “Spike” texture, are a happy exception to that generally-sensible rule.

That’s right, I’m back again with another Godemiche Grind Rings review!

In Case You’re New Here…

If you’re new, you may have missed my previous posts, in which I outline what a Grind Ring is and some of the many ways you can use it. Check them out here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3. If you’re considering getting one, these reviews will also help you decide which texture is likely to work best for you.

In brief, here’s a description of what they are and how they work:

The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding, dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

Each Grind Ring measures 6 inches in length and 4.3 inches across at the widest point. They feature a stretchy hole for a penis or dildo to fit through at the base. They’re designed to be used during penetrative sex for additional clitoral stimulation, but they’re actually really versatile and can be used in all sorts of ways, from getting you off while you’re sitting at your desk writing erotica, to changing up hand sex with different textures.

The Two New Textures

I received the new “Pyramid Spikes” and “Tall Pyramid Spikes” textures, which are exactly what they sound like. Here’s what they look like:

Pyramid Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings from Godemiche

As with all Godemiche products, you can choose from an array of gorgeous colours for your Grind Ring. I asked for purples and greens, and I received the Tall Pyramid Spikes in Winter Berry and the Pyramid Spikes in a mix of Ruby Rose and Garden Party. (As a general rule, Grind Rings are only available in single colours, so I feel very privileged to have received a limited edition one in my two favourite colours!)

The colours have a subtle shimmer and a really lovely swirling effect that you can see on the back:

Back view of Godemiche Grind Rings

Most importantly, though, how did they feel?

Pyramids

Adam from Godemiche says that the Pyramids Grind Ring texture was “inspired by a belt I happened to see someone wearing while out grocery shopping. It reminded me of my own ‘skater boy’ days when none of my trousers fit and I often opted for a studded belt to keep them around my thighs.” If you can’t picture what he means, think something like this.

I expected the Pyramids to feel a lot like the Spikes, but they really don’t. They’re less flexible, and still soft but with an overall firmer texture. I found the sensation from the Pyramids to be quite subtle compared to other designs in the range. I can best describe the feeling as a kind of pressure with some gentle texturing. For a point of comparison, the Pyramids is about on a par with the Bubbles for me, intensity-wise.

I’m unlikely to each orgasm with this one, but it’s a good warm-up texture before moving onto something more intense.

Tall Pyramids

I think the Tall Pyramids might have overtaken the Waves as my favourite Grind Ring texture of all!

The square spikes are noticeably smaller than those on the Spikes ring (see the below picture for comparison). So though that’s probably the closet comparison, they’re really quite different in use.

Godemiche Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings

The Tall Pyramids are very soft and very flexible. Since they’re so soft, they really don’t feel “pointy” at all.

You can get a range of sensations from the Tall Pyramids Grind Ring. In my experience, if I grind down hard against it, I get an all-over rubbing sensation, whereas if I support some of my weight and just glide my vulva along it, it’s more of a gentle tickle.

I think I like this texture best because you get constant stimulation as the spikes slide along your vulva. The little pyramids feel like dozens of little silicone tongues lapping at and around my clit. As you grind, they flick back and forth, offering both direct clitoral stimulation and all-over vulva pleasure.

Verdict

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: these toys are so genuinely innovative and just so damn good! They’re all very different and, interestingly, I think overall the Pyramids is my least favourite of the six and the Tall Pyramids is my favourite. But all the designs are good, it’s just a matter of individual preferences which one will work best for you.

Such a simple idea, so brilliantly executed.

Grind Rings retail for £34.99. You can get one hand-made to order in your choice of colour and texture, or grab one off-the-shelf for faster delivery.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me these Grind Rings in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post and using them sends me a small commission at no additional cost to you.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Morpheus

Many of you may be aware that I consider the Godemiche Ambit to be just about the most perfect silicone dildo in existence. The size, the curve, the flex… it’s all there. The fact that it comes in a huge array of colours, combinations, and even sparkly and pride flag options doesn’t hurt, either.

That’s why I was very keen to try out Godemiche’s new dildo, the Morpheus, which went on sale today.

I received the Morpheus in Emerald Glitter, a beautiful and bright shade of sparkly green. In the sea of near-endless pink/black that is the sex toy industry, being able to get things in different and unexpected colours is one of Godemiche’s big selling points.

Seriously, look how pretty it is!

Godemiche Morpheus green glittery silicone dildo

The Morpheus is made from body-safe, easy-care silicone. It’s hypoallergenic, condom compatible, and sterilising is as easy as throwing it in a pan of boiling water for a few minutes.

How does the Morpheus differ from the Ambit?

Like the Ambit, the Morpheus comes in an array of different sizing options. I received the Morpheus Thin Small, which measures 5.7″ in total length (5.3″ insertable) and 1.1″ wide at the centre of the shaft. There’s also a Thin Medium, Thick Small, and Thick Medium option. So whatever your length and girth preferences, you should be able to find a Morpheus to suit you.

The most notable difference between the Morpheus and the Ambit is that the former has a more pronounced curve. Here’s what they look like next to each other:

Godemiche Ambit and Morpheus silicone dildo comparison

The Morpheus’s head is also more gently tapered and less pronounced than the Ambit’s. This might make it more comfortable for some users and in some circumstances (more on my experiences with that in a minute).

Morpheus in use

The first thing I noticed about the Morpheus, once I’d finished admiring how sparkly and pretty it is, is that the silicone is quite matte and “grabby”. This just means it’s really, really important to use plenty of lube, which I always recommend anyway. A simple water-based lube will give you a pleasurable glide without damaging your toy (or staining the hell out of your sheets!)

Green glitter dildo

Unlike many sex writers I know, I’m not really into very girthy penetrative toys. I find that they cross the line from pleasurable to painful really quickly. When it comes to insertable things, I’m all about direct and targeted G-spot stimulation, which means that slimline toys with a decent curve tend to be the way to go. The Morpheus’s slimline shaft is perfect for my body in this regard.

Flexible dildo, green silicone dildo from Godemiche

This toy’s deep curve and bulbed head are also absolutely dreamy. The head is the ideal size for focused G-spot pressure, and the curve makes it easy to find the right spot. It’s also super flexible, which can help with comfortable insertion and positioning. I don’t have a prostate, being a cis woman, but if you’re someone who does I can imagine this toy would be equally perfect for P-spot play. Its flared base makes it anal safe.

The Morpheus comes with a nice wide base, so it’s perfect for popping into your strap-on harness if that’s your thing. I also appreciate this wider base designed because it makes for a convenient handle, making the toy easier to hold and manipulate.

Pro tip: fan of strong vibrations internally? Place a high-powered wand vibrator against the base of your dildo.

Verdict

Comfortable, slimline shaft? Check. Great curve? Check. Pronounced head for targeted G-spotting? Check. On all counts, the Godemiche Morpheus is a genuinely excellent dildo and a worthy addition to the company’s range and my collection. It’s also currently living on my desk because it’s so sparkly it makes me happy every time I look at it.

The Morpheus retails from £44.99 – £52.99 depending on which size you go for.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me this product to review. All views are, as ever, my own. Affiliate links appear within this post.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Ring “Hearts”

Happy Valentine’s Day, loves!

I’m generally not too fussed about Valentine’s Day these days. In non-plague times it’s as good an excuse for a date as any, but I’m not super into the idea of expressing love just because it’s a particular date. I’d rather show my love all year round. With that said, I’ve decided to mark the day in two ways: I’m wearing my “DM Me” heart tights from Snag, and I’m bringing you a review of Godemiche’s new Grind Ring texture, “Hearts”.

What is a Grind Ring and how do you use it?

If you’re new here, you may have missed my previous reviews (part 1 and part 2) of the Grind Ring collection. In Godemiche’s own words:

The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding, dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

They measure 6 inches in length and 4.3 inches across at the widest point, and feature a stretchy hole for a penis or dildo to fit through at the base.

There are currently six textures available, of which Hearts is the newest addition. I knew I wanted my Hearts Grind Ring in a Valentine’s-themed colour, so I opted for Ruby Rose. It’s a gorgeous and shimmery red/pink, and on the flat back side of the toy you get a beautiful marbling, swirling effect. Here’s what it looks like:

Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring, Valentine's Day sex toy
Back of Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring, Valentine's Day sex toy for women and people with clits

The intended purpose of a Grind Ring is to wear it around the penis or dildo during penetrative sex with someone with a clitoris, so that the receptive partner can grind against it and enjoy additional clitoral stimulation (which, as we know, is essential to reach orgasm for a significant majority of cis women and other people with vulvas).

However, as I’ve discovered, there are numerous other ways to enjoy this toy. While it’s certainly fun to use during P-in-V sex with my partner, I actually mostly use my Grind Rings by placing them on a firm surface (my desk chair is ideal) and grinding against it from a seated position. I also regularly use them as an accessory for hand sex, as that allows me to feel all the lovely texture while having finer control over the pressure and angle. Other good options include using it with a dildo for solo sex, or placing it over the head of a powerful wand vibrator.

As always, the only “right” way to use a toy is the way that feels right for you.

Texture: Hearts

So the Hearts Grind Ring is obviously cute as fuck. But how does it feel in use? I had a feeling I was going to get along well with this one as soon as I saw it, and I wasn’t disappointed. The hearts are sufficiently raised to provide a unique, and moderately intense, sensation. For a point of comparison, I’d describe the Hearts texture as less intense than the Spikes texture but more intense than the Waves or Bumps.

Due to the shape of the hearts, I find this Grind Ring is more intense on the downward motion than on the upward motion. The smooth silicone, coupled with the deeply ridged texture, is divine when paired with tonnes of lube. Of all the Grind Ring textures I’ve now tried, the Hearts is the one that gets me off the most quickly and the most consistently.

I’d recommend this one to people who enjoy firm pressure with their clitoral stimulation. It’s as functional as it is pretty and I’m a little bit in love.

Pro tip: I like to put a little clitoral balm on the toy itself for added intensity.

Verdict

Definitely a toy that’s not just for Valentine’s Day! I just received my Hearts Grind Ring a few days ago and it’s fast becoming an absolute favourite.

You know what else I love about these toys? Apart from the fact that they feel amazing, that is. As far as I can tell, there really isn’t anything else quite like this on the market. Genuine innovation is pretty rare in this industry, where copycat products and occasionally blatant design stealing are rampant. And oftentimes, when a sex toy is original in design, it’s also… kind of terrible. So to come across something that’s both actually innovative and actually good is a breath of fresh air.

The Hearts Grind Ring retails for £34.99. Get one for yourself or your favourite clit owner. You won’t regret it.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me this product to review. Affiliate links appear in this post. Buying through my links helps to keep the blog going at no additional cost to you. All views, as always, are mine.

[Toy Review] Hot Octopuss PleX with Flex

Do you all remember the Kurve vibrator from Hot Octopuss? I raved about the Kurve because of its dual “treble and bass” motors, which allow the user to customise not just the intensity level of the vibrations, but also where they fall on the buzz-rumble scale. Well, a new Hot Octopuss toy has arrived, and it uses the same tech. But this time, it’s for your butt. Meet the PleX with Flex.

What is PleX with Flex?

The PleX with Flex is a vibrating butt plug by Hot Octopuss. It measures 5.5″ in total length, of which around 5″ are insertable, and 1.7″ in diameter at the widest point. The plug sits on a wide base. As the name suggests, it’s ultra flexible, bending up to 90 degrees in any direction.

My PleX with Flex arrived packaged in Hot Octopuss’s signature, sleek black packaging with a picture of the toy on the front. In the box you’ll find your plug, a little square remote control, a branded storage pouch, a charging cable, and an instruction leaflet. I do appreciate that Hot Octopuss always include a storage bag with their toys. It’s such a small thing but it really does help a more expensive product feel like value for money.

PleX with Flex vibrating butt plug in its box

The PleX with Flex is made of smooth and body-safe matte black silicone. It is also fully waterproof, though the remote control is not. It’s rechargeable via the included USB cable.

What I Liked

By far my favourite thing about the PleX with Flex is its shape. The smooth, tapered shape makes insertion comfortable, and the ultra flexible nature of it means you can position the toy exactly how you want. I don’t have a prostate but for people who do, I’m informed that the curved shape of the PleX with Flex makes it ideal for targeted prostate pleasure.

PleX with Flex black silicone butt plug from Hot Octopuss

The PleX with Flex’s motors are also fantastic. It houses a rumbly (“bass”) motor towards the bottom of the shaft, and a buzzy (“treble”) motor towards the tip. With independent controls (we’ll talk more about the and five available pattern settings for each motor, you can create an enormous range of different experiences and sensations. Best of all, each motor is powerful. I’m not a big fan of buzz, so I eventually found that the sweet spot for me was to have the buzzy motor on low and the rumbly motor on a higher setting.

PleX with Flex vibrating prostate massager

The large base, which essentially functions as a handle, also makes it possible to thrust with this toy, if you want to. That’s unusual in a butt plug style toy. For that reason, I’d recommend this one if you’re working up to anal penetration with a penis or a larger dildo.

The PleX with Flex also isn’t too loud relative to its vibration strength. Even outside the body it’s pretty quiet, and when it’s inserted the sound is muffled still further. You might not want to use it out in public, but there’s no way you’ll wake the neighbours!

The PleX with Flex is also easy to keep clean. I recommend using a body-safe sterilising wipe then wash it thoroughly in warm water and gentle soap.

Anything I Didn’t Love?

The PleX with Flex is fundamentally a well designed toy. Its shape is dreamy and its motors are excellent. With that said, there are a few things I think could be improved.

My biggest complaint lies in the buttons and controls. Placing the controls on the bottom of the toy’s base is an odd choice for this one. This makes it impossible to see the buttons when the toy is inserted. So you have to either rely on touch alone (possible but not ideal), ask your partner to change the setting for you if you’re using the toy together, or take it out to change the setting and then reinsert. None of which is ideal.

PleX with Flex silicone prostate massager buttons

I could forgive this if the remote control was brilliantly designed, but it’s… not. Hot Octopuss’s remote controls are inexplicably tiny. I think they’re going for discretion but, unless you’re going to use the toy in public (which, as I’ve said, I don’t recommend) I’d rather have a slightly bigger control that’s easier to use. Being so small, it’s difficult to hold and easy to lose. I much, much prefer the wrist strap design offered with toys like the Pulse Solo Lux.

Remote for remote control vibrating butt plug PleX with Flex

The battery life is also a bit of an issue. It lasts about an hour on a full charge. But with a charging time of 4 hours, I would have liked its run time to be a little longer.

From a personal experience perspective, another downside is that the PleX with Flex is slightly too big. It took me a long-ass (ha) time to write up this review, partly because my butt is rarely up for taking something of this size. This is less an objective criticism, admittedly, than a personal preference. I’d really love to see them release a mini version alongside this one, for those of us who prefer a smaller anal toy. So if any Hot Octopuss designers are reading…

The PleX with Flex isn’t really a leave-in toy. Given the size of the base and the location of the buttons, sitting or walking around all day with it in isn’t really possible. This isn’t really a downside as such, just something to be aware of. This is a toy

Verdict

It’s a mixed bag for me with this one. Ultimately, the PleX with Flex is a toy that meets specific needs well. If you’re looking for a butt toy with strong motors and an ability to experiment with buzz/rumble as well as power level and patterns, this is the one for you. I also recommend it if you’re looking for a vibrating anal toy you can thrust with. On the other hand, if you’re looking for something more akin to an “insert and leave in” anal toy, this is not it.

At £89.95, it’s not a cheap toy. While its body-safe materials, well-designed shape, and powerful motors work in its favour, there are notable downsides that make it hard to give an unqualified YES to this one.

PleX with Flex banner from Hot Octopuss sex toys

The PleX with Flex is available from Hot Octopuss, who sent me the product in exchange for an honest review. All views are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Agent Provocateur X Lovehoney Rumba Wand Vibrator

I have never owned a single thing made by luxury lingerie brand Agent Provocateur. This is partly due to the fact that they make only a very few bra styles and zero unwired designs in my size (36G in case you were wondering), and partly because I do not live in a world where spending tens or even hundreds of pounds on a pair of knickers is a reasonable financial choice. Even so, every time I am reminded that they exist, I find myself sighing over the pretty things and wishing I was both wealthier and smaller busted.

So naturally, when I saw that Lovehoney had teamed up with Agent Provocateur to create a line of sex toys, I simply had to get my hands on one to try.

Agent Provocateur X Lovehoney Rumba Wand Vibrator

I received the Rumba Wand Vibrator. This silicone wand measures 7″ in length and features a broad, prominent head and flexible neck.

My Rumba Wand Vibrator arrived in an attractive pink box with Lovehoney and Agent Provocateur branding. Inside, the toy sits in a very stylish zip-up leather case with rose gold zip and Agent Provocateur branding. It’s definitely real leather, so that’s something you might want to be aware of if you’re vegan or have ethical objections to leather. Absolutely top marks for stylish and luxurious presentation!

The Rumba Wand Vibrator is coated in super soft, body-safe black silicone. Its handle is firm to the touch, while the head has a nice level of squish. The button panel is the same rose gold as the adornments on the case, and the base of the toy features the Lovehoney heart insignia on one side and the Agent Provocateur logo on the other side.

The Rumba Wand Vibrator is USB rechargeable and waterproof.

In Use

In case you’re new here: hi, I’m Amy and I have a wand vibrator obsession! I collect every type I can get my hands on. I even once did a big compare and contrast (though that’s now woefully out of date, so I should probably do another one). All this to say that I am predisposed to like wands, but I am also very discerning.

So did the Rumba Wand Vibrator pass the test?

First, the good. I love the Rumba’s flexible neck, which allows for easy and comfortable positioning. The ultra squishy dual density silicone of the head also feels lovely. The user interface is simple, with one button to change between the 7 patterns and one button to change between the 3 levels of intensity.

Flexible vibrator, wand massager with bendy neck

There’s also a nifty setting where, if you hold down the bottom button (the one for the patterns), it will switch back to continuous vibration no matter what pattern setting you were on. Pretty useful for people who don’t care for patterns, especially if you accidentally hit the wrong button when trying to change speeds.

So with credit given where it’s due for this toy’s good points, what didn’t I love? The main issue with the Rumba Wand Vibrator is that it’s just not as powerful as I wanted it to be. A rechargeable mini wand vibrator is never going to be as powerful as a mains powered wand, of course. But even taking that into account, the motor was neither as strong nor as rumbly as I would expect from a toy at this price point.

I can orgasm with the Rumba Wand Vibrator if I’m very turned on and at least somewhat patient, but it takes effort. Since I tend to reach for my wand vibes when I want a quick and easy orgasm, I doubt I’ll be using this one regularly.

The battery life isn’t great, either – 45 minutes for a full (2 hour) charge.

Finally, and this is a small issue but it’s really bugging me: the rose gold coating on the button panel is already starting to chip off. It doesn’t affect the functionality of the toy, but I’d expect better from a product with a £110 pricetag and a luxury brand name behind it.

Verdict

I really wanted to love this one more than I actually did.

Though it has some good design points and is clearly made of safe and high quality materials, the Rumba Wand Vibrator falls down in the functionality department with its disappointing, buzzy motor. Considering it retails for £109.99 ($149.99 US), I’d have expected it to pack more of a punch than it did.

If you’re after a basic middling-power wand vibe, it’s fine, but be aware that you’re paying for the brand name as much as anything. You can get a better mini wand, or even the world’s best wand vibrator, for less money.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product to review! All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Orgazmic Waterproof Clitoral Vibrator

When Honey Play Box invited me to review some products from their extensive range, I was immediately drawn to the Orgazmic Waterproof Clitoral Vibrator. Its interesting shape and remote control functionality suggested a range of interesting possibilities.

But did it impress me when I tried it out?

What is the Orgazmic?

Orgazmic waterproof clitoral vibrator, vibrator for women, people with vulvas, couples

The Orgazmic is a small clitoral vibrator. It measures 4.16″ in length and 1.05″ across at the widest point and is coated in 100% body-safe, hypoallergenic silicone. It’s available in pink or purple. It is rechargeable via the included magnetic cable, with a full charge giving around 2 hours of play.

The Orgazmic is completely waterproof, so you can use it in the bath or shower if that’s your thing.

My Orgazmic came packaged discreetly in a solid, plain black box. Great for gifting and also works well as a storage box.

My Experience

As soon as I pulled it out of the box, I knew I was going to absolutely love the shape of the Orgazmic. It is slightly curved, similar in shape to “panty vibes” you may have seen, with ribbing in the silicone at the wider end and a raised nub in the centre. This is a vibrator that’s absolutely made for grinding on! Slide it between bodies during sex with a partner, or place it on a firm surface. It also rests comfortably against the vulva as a lay-on toy, or even slips into your underwear, if you prefer.

Orgazmic panty vibrator, clitoral vibrator

The Orgazmic offers 9 different vibration modes including 3 constant speeds and 9 patterns, and operates on a simple 1 button interface.

Orgazmic waterproof vibrator

While the Orgazmic offers a decent level of power for such a small toy, I really would have liked it to be rumblier. I much prefer deep, penetrating rumbles to the more surface-level vibes of the Orgazmic. Of course, this isn’t a universal experience! If you prefer higher frequency vibrations, the Orgazmic will suit you well.

The Orgazmic is easy to clean when you’re done. Just use some warm water and gentle soap or a sterile medical wipe.

Remote Control Capabilities

The Orgazmic comes with a separate remote control, which you can slip into your pocket or hand to your partner. I’m not sure exactly what the range is, but I tested it at a range of about 10 metres and it worked perfectly, so it’ll be suitable for most remote control play when you’re in the same physical space.

Remote from remote control vibrator panty vibrator

The Orgazmic is quiet-ish, topping out at around 45 dB. If you want to use it out and about, I’d recommend choosing spaces that have a decent level of ambient noise to begin with. Remember it’s not cool to involve others in your play without consent!

Remember that the remote control will also need charging (via the same cable as the toy), so factor that in to your charging time before you play.

Verdict

The Orgazmic is a decent all-rounder if you like buzzier vibrations. It’s got a great shape, reliable remote control compatibility, and a good number of settings and patterns to choose from.

The Orgazmic retails for $51.99.

This review was sponsored by Honey Play Box. This means they provided me with this product and paid me to write a fair and honest review. All opinions are, as always, my own.

[Toy Review] Fifty Shades of Grey Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator

I think we all know how I feel about Fifty Shades of Grey as a cultural phenomenon by now, don’t we? In case you don’t, here’s a quick primer: it romanticises domestic abuse, gets BDSM dangerously wrong, and is just horribly written considering how much money it made.

However, I’m also a realist, and I know that this genie is out of the bottle, so to speak. People are going to come to sex positivity, BDSM, and sex toys via the Fifty Shades route. As a kinkster, sex positive educator, and pleasure product expert, I think those of us already in these communities have a big responsibility to these newcomers. And that responsibility is to welcome them. To provide resources. To be there for them and to show them that while Fifty Shades might be a fun fantasy (if you like that sort of thing), the reality is so much cooler and more exciting.

That’s why I’m glad that, when the inevitable Fifty Shades of Grey vibrators and other Fifty Shades sex toys emerged, they were at least well-designed and body safe.

All this to say I’m reviewing another toy from Lovehoney’s official Fifty Shades range: the Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator.

Fifty Shades Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator

Fifty Shades of Grey Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator

The Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator measures 4.5″ in length, and tapers from a wide base to a narrow, pointed tip. When switched on, this tip “flickers” against your clit as the toy vibrates.

In the box, you’ll find the toy as well as a USB charging cable and a storage bag made from REPREVE® recycled plastic (eco-friendly, yay!)

Fifty Shades of Grey vibrator and sex toy storage bag

The Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator is made of smooth matte black silicone, which is non-porous and body-safe. It’s also submersible, should you want to use it in water (this also makes cleaning easier).

Sensation-al?

After some recent positive experiences with tongue vibrators, I was hopeful that the Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator would be another surprising gem. Unfortunately, that wasn’t to be. On the whole, this toy didn’t work for me.

The first problem is the pointy tip. While I sometimes enjoy pinpoint clitoral stimulation, the Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator’s silicone tip felt more like something jabbing my clit than stimulating it. (I mean, maybe that’s your thing? If so, live your best life! But it’s not mine). It was a little better when I used it sideways on or over my clitoral hood, but with the slightest wrong move, the pokey sensation was back.

Fifty Shades of Grey vibrator tongue vibe

The second problem is that the motor is not very strong, and buzzy as hell to boot. After ten minutes or so of vainly chasing an orgasm, I was annoyed and had a numb clit.

Finally, the user interface. The Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator has a single button interface and a whopping 20 patterns and settings. This means that if you want to turn the power down a notch, or return to a previous pattern, you’re left scrolling alllllllll the way back through. I don’t know about you, but having to press a button 20 times just to get the setting I want seriously impedes my wank game.

Good point, because credit where credit is due: the Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator is quiet. That and its body-safe material, though, are about the only good things I can say about it.

Verdict

Overall, I found the Fifty Shades of Grey Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator disappointing. With a stronger and rumblier motor, it could be fine for people who like very pinpointed stimulation. With a stronger motor, a less pointy tip, and a better button system, it could be excellent. But the current product is lacklustre at best and I doubt I’ll use it again.

Skip it and get a decent bullet vibe instead.

The Sensation Flickering Tongue Vibrator retails for £36.99 ($44.99 US) at Lovehoney.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product to review. All views, as always, are my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Seduction and Alvina Tongue Vibrators

My favourite types of sex toys to try are those that I look at and think “I can’t even imagine what that would feel like!” Call me a curious creature, I guess. That’s why I was spoiled for choice when the good folks at Honey Play Box reached out and offered me a selection of products from their extensive catalogue – which includes suction toys, tongue vibrators, traditional vibes, and much more – to try.

Alvina and Seduction tongue vibrators from Honey Play Box
Seduction (back) and Alvina.

In the end, I chose four products to test, and I’m going to talk about two of them in this post. “Tongue vibrators” are hit and miss for me in general, and I don’t think it’s realistic to expect a toy to effectively mimic receiving oral sex from a human partner. So with that in mind, could the Seduction and Alvina vibrators from Honey Play Box impress me?

Seduction

The Seduction (or Seduction Stimulation Suction Vibrator, to give it its full title) won the Xbiz Toy of the Year Award 2021, so I was very keen to test this award-winning product.

Honey Play Box seduction clit licking tongue vibrator suction vibrator

The Seduction’s innovative design combines suction (of the type you’d get from a pussy pump) with a rapid licking action from a small silicone tongue. The wide head sits over your vulva, creating a seal. This then provides suction either constantly or in a pulsing pattern, while the tongue laps at your clit. There are 5 suction modes and 10 tongue modes to choose from.

Buttons on Honey Play Box Seduction tongue vibrator

The only real downside for me was that I struggled to get the Seduction to create a proper vacuum against my vulva due to my pubic hair. I feel like this toy was definitely designed with hairless pussies or heavily trimmed pubes in mind. Getting it to stick in place and create a seal was a matter of trial and error, and it would dislodge with a small wrong movement. Adding a little water-based lube around the rim helped to get a seal.

Honey Play Box Seduction clit licking suction vibrator for a review of tongue vibrators

That frustration aside, I genuinely enjoyed using the Seduction. The suction function offers a new and different sensation that’s unlike any toy I’ve used before, and the flicking tongue is perfect for those like me who love intense and targeted clitoral stimulation.

The Seduction is rechargeable via the included cable (a full charge lasts around 3 hours) and made of body-safe silicone with ABS plastic accents. It’s also pretty quiet. The suction makes a distinctive whirring noise, but it’s not super loud and is unlikely to be audible, say, in the next room. The flicking tongue is impressively quiet. The Seduction is splashproof but not waterproof, so clean it with a medical wipe or a warm damp cloth but do not submerge it underwater.

Alvina

The Alvina (full title Alvina Luxury Tongue Licking Clitoral Vibrator) features a circular handle/base with a finger loop for ease of use. It’s ultra light and a pretty rose pink/red colour.

Alvina tongue vibrator for a review of Honey Play Box tongue vibrators

The Alvina opens at the top to reveal a wide silicone tongue. This tongue flicks back and forth in any one of 9 different speeds and patterns, controlled by a single button, and can be used by itself or with any of the 9 vibration patterns controlled by the second button. You can mix and match the two functions in any combination, creating over 80 different possible combinations. Pretty neat!

My clit adores the Alvina’s wide, flat tongue, especially when combined with plenty of lube. The gentle, rhythmical lapping is an amazing warm up and, when I add the vibrations, it becomes intense enough to get me off quickly and reliably.

Alvina tongue vibrator clitoral oral sex simulator

The vibrations are quite “buzzy”, which I’m usually not a big fan of, but in this context I find I don’t mind. I think the combination of vibration and tongue motion means that I don’t really notice that the vibes are buzzier than I’d typically go for.

Buttons on Alvina clit tongue vibrator from Honey Play Box

The Alvina is rechargeable, with a full charge lasting up to 3 hours. Like the Seduction, it’s impressively quiet. Made of silicone with ABS plastic, it is hygienic and body-safe. The Alvina is also waterproof, in case bath or shower play is your thing. Clean it using warm, soapy water or a sterile medical wipe.

So Which Do I Like More?

It’s a tough call, as I was genuinely impressed by both of these toys. But I think ultimately the Alvina has the edge for me. I found the slightly wider tongue more friendly to my sensitive clit, and this design more compatible with a body with pubic hair. But these are both cleverly designed, effective tongue vibrators that are distinct from anything else I have in my collection.

The Seduction retails for $106.99 and the Alvina retails for $71.99.

Heads up: this review was sponsored, meaning I was paid to test the products and provide my honest opinion. All views are my own, as always.