Tag: penetrative sex

Abstract music notes background. Text reads: We-Vibe Chorus Pro

[Toy Review] We-Vibe Chorus Pro

Published on by Amy

When I learned that a new version of the We-Vibe Chorus was dropping, this time named the We-Vibe Chorus Pro, my first thought was “already!?” Surely it hasn’t been that long since the first iteration of the Chorus hit the market. However, apparently it’s been well over five years! Time is fake. That can mean only one thing: it’s time for a review of the newly released We-Vibe Chorus Pro.

What is the We-Vibe Chorus Pro?

The Pro is a new, updated version of the original We-Vibe Chorus. It’s the same basic design, and follows the theme of We-Vibe’s classic C-shaped “wear during intercourse” vibrators.

We-Vibe Chorus Pro & remote in purple

It’s designed to offer additional clitoral stimulation to the wearer during penetrative sex, while also stimulating the inside of their vagina and (if applicable) their partner’s penis with vibrations. It comes with a “Haptic Squeeze Remote” (more on that below) and can also be controlled via the We-Vibe app.

The Chorus Pro is made of body-safe silicone and available in 3 colourways: Cosmic Purple, Satin Black, and Electric Pink. Its internal arm measures ???

The Chorus Pro is rechargeable, with a 2 hour charge giving around 90 minutes of running time. Its sturdy black plastic storage case is also a USB charging case. It is also IPX7 waterproof, i.e. submersible. It’s unclear whether the remote is waterproof, though; the Chorus Original’s remote was only splashproof so the same may be true here.

Chorus vs Chorus Pro: What’s New?

The We-Vibe Chorus Pro offers many of the same features as the previous iteration of this product, including the adjustable hinged design, squeezable remote, app control options, and touch sensors on the main body of the toy. However, it also offers a number of upgrades. Most notably:

Three Motors and Fusion Wave Stimulation

While the original Chorus had two motors, the Chorus Pro has three. There are two motors in the external clitoral stimulator, and one in the insertable arm. This enables something We-Vibe calls “Fusion Wave Technology”, which sounds like something out of Star Trek but actually seems to just mean that the two clitoral motor synchronise to offer rhythmic, rolling and flowing “wave-like” vibrations.

“Haptic Squeeze” Remote

Close up of We-Vibe Chorus Pro remote in my hand, demonstrating for review

Though the original Chorus had a squeeze-sensitive remote, the Chorus Pro has had a significant upgrade in this regard. The word “haptic” just means something relating to the sense of touch. The new Chorus remote is designed to adjust vibration strength with the intensity of the squeeze, with the remote vibrating at the same strength as the toy to provide immediate feedback to the person holding it.

Is this a good thing? Debatable. We’ll get into this in more detail shortly.

We-Vibe Chorus Pro Review: Pros

Something I appreciate about We-Vibe is that, unlike some toy manufacturers, they don’t constantly churn out new products at an alarmingly fast rate. Instead, they seem to take their time and put real thought into their designs. As a result, the We-Vibe Chorus Pro has a lot to recommend it.

Let’s get into what I like about this product.

  • It’s so pretty! The material sort of shimmers.
  • The hinged design allows you to adjust the fit according to your body.
  • The charging case is convenient for both travel and storage. For an ADHDer like me, it also makes me less likely to lose either the toy or the remote.
  • With 7 classic We-Vibe patterns and 3 new “Fusion Wave” patterns built in, as well as constant vibrations and the ability to change the intensity level of any pattern using the remote, the user experience is pretty versatile even before you get the app involved.
  • The remote is highly responsive, both in squeeze mode and when just using the buttons.
  • The squishy design also makes the motor super comfortable to hold and use.
Underside of We-Vibe Chorus Pro with hinge open to show textured surface

  • I love the texturing on the underside of the external arm. It’s pretty subtle but it adds a little extra stimulation. I can’t personally feel the texturing on the internal arm when I’m wearing it, but other users’ experience may differ.
  • The addition of a third motor really does make a difference in use. While I think calling it “Fusion Wave” is a stretch, the synchronised external motors deliver more intense clitoral and all-over vulva stimulation than a single motor can manage on its own.
  • The motors! We-Vibe always uses excellent strong and rumbly motors in its toys, and this one is no exception.

Cons

There are also a few things about the We-Vibe Chorus Pro I found frustrating. Namely:

  • While the original Chorus had two adjustable hinges for a better fit, the Chorus Pro appears to only have one. It’s a shame to lose the extra adjustability the additional hinge offered.
  • There doesn’t seem to be a way to control the motors separately using the toy itself or the remote. If you want to do this, you’ll need the app. As someone who doesn’t like internal vibrations, this is a pretty big downside for me personally.
  • The insertable section isn’t long enough (or curved enough) to get anywhere near my G-spot. Instead of providing additional pleasure, it just sort of sits there as an anchor to hold the toy in place (sort of; see below.)
  • Overall, as in the original We-Vibe Chorus, I found the “Touch Sense” modes too unpredictable and unreliable to be pleasurable. It’s an interesting concept, but the reality is mostly just annoying.
  • I wish there were better controls on the toy itself. The single button interface is very limiting and basically means this toy is only worthwhile with either the remote or the app.
  • Like virtually all toys of this type, it doesn’t really stay in place without a helping hand unless you’re staying very still (and sometimes not even then.) If you’re moving or doing any kind of thrusting, you pretty much have to hold it in position with your hand to stop it slipping around all over the place.

Other Things to Be Aware Of

We-Vibe Chorus Pro inside its black plastic charging case

I have really mixed feelings about the haptic feedback of the squeeze remote. On the one hand, having the feedback could be useful if you’re using the toy on a partner and want to get a sense of the intensity of the stimulation for them. On the other hand, having your hand repeatedly vibrated is really annoying and uncomfortable. Ultimately, each user will need to decide if this bothers them (and, if it does, if they like the feature enough to put up with it.)

I also find that, the longer I do this job, the less I care about a toy’s app features. I can count on one hand the times I’ve used an app to control a toy outside of an “I’m testing this product so I can review it” session. I don’t really want to be on my phone when I’m trying to masturbate or have sex, I don’t use toys in public because they’re nowhere near as discreet as some people seem to think they are, and I’ve found ways to have long-distance sex that work better for me personally.

That said, We-Vibe’s app is one of the better options for app-controlled toys out there, and it offers a number of intriguing additional options including:

  • Handing control over to a partner anywhere in the world with an internet connection
  • Chatting and video-calling with a partner while they control the toy
  • As mentioned above, controlling the motors separately
  • Activating the three available “Touch Sense” modes
  • More finely controlling the intensity of the vibrations
  • Touch mode, in which you can control the toy with the swipe of a finger
  • Creating your own vibration patterns
  • Creating “playlists” of your favourite patterns

We-Vibe Chorus Pro Review: Verdict

Overall, I think the We-Vibe Chorus Pro is an excellent product. It improves on the original in a couple of fun ways, while maintaining We-Vibe’s reputation for good motors and thoughtful design. Despite a few frustrations, I’m still happy to recommend it.

The Chorus Pro retails for £189/$229 and is available from Lovehoney UK, Lovehoney US, Shevibe, Good Vibes, Babeland, or directly from We-Vibe Europe and North America.

I received the We-Vibe Chorus Pro in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post. All views, as always, are mine.

Header image for UEROS vibe review featuring woman's body in black lingerie

[Toy Review] UEROS Remote Control Wearable Vibrator with Detachable Egg Set

Published on by Amy

Following my UEROS sex machine review a while back, I received another UEROS product to try. This time, we’re looking at the wearable vibe set, or the “UEROS Remote Control Wearable Vibrator with Detachable Egg Set,” to give it its full name.

What is the UEROS Wearable Vibe Set?

At first glance, the UEROS wearable vibrator set is an interesting concept. It contains four main pieces:

  • A thin, vaguely saddle-shaped vibrator that sits against the pubis with a protruding clitoral stimulator
  • A detachable egg vibrator that fits inside the vagina
  • A harness/crotchless panty thing with straps to hold the vibrator against the body
  • A remote control

The main intended use for the UEROS vibe set is for it to be wearable during (penetrative) partnered sex. In case you’re struggling to visualise how it’s intended to work, here’s a handy diagram provided by UEROS:

UEROS wearable vibe set official product photo showing a woman wearing the toy over a set of black lingerie

The vibrator and egg are made of body-safe silicone (with plastic accents on the former.) The harness is made of polyester and spandex.

This USB rechargeable toy offers 1 hour of runtime for a 2 hour charge. It is also IPX6 waterproof, i.e. splashproof but not submersible.

UEROS Wearable Vibe Set: The Good

Let’s start with the positive things I can say about this product.

UEROS wearable vibe attached to included panties

First, I do think the concept is neat. It’s kind of a combination of insertable wearable vibrators (such as the various iterations of We-Vibe’s classic shape) and those “vibrating knickers” that are still inexplicably a thing even though they almost universally suck.

The slim design is thoughtful and means the toy is less obtrusive and “in the way” if you’re using it during partnered sex. Design-wise, I also like the long tail on the egg. This sidesteps the issue of dual-stimulation toys often being designed for one specific type of genitals, making it more likely to fit comfortably with a range of bodies.

The detachable design of the egg vibrator makes this a more versatile product. You could also use the egg on its own as a non-vibrating, leave-in toy, if you like.

The six straps on the harness/panties hold the vibrator in place very well. Unlikely many “wear during intercourse” toys, it stays securely in position. A rare instance of a supposedly hands-free toy that’s actually suitable for hands-free use.

I like that, when you’re using the external vibrator and the egg together, you can control them completely separately. There’s one button for each part on both the main toy and the remote control. Each has five settings: three constant speeds and two patterns.

UEROS wearable vibrator with egg part attached

The silicone is soft and silky. Aesthetically, it’s also kind of fun. The metallic accents give the whole thing a vaguely sci-fi/techno feel.

UEROS Wearable Vibe Set: The Bad

Buckle in, because once I started actually trying this product, things went sideways fast.

The placement of the buttons on the top side of the toy seems fine initially, but quickly reveals a significant problem. If you’re having penetrative sex in a face-to-face position such as missionary, the chances of the toy getting smushed between bodies and accidentally turned off are very high.

I also want to know why the clitoral stimulator is squishy. This makes the already-poor vibration transmission even worse and makes it hard to get any significant, consistent pressure.

Underside of UEROS wearable vibrator showing squishy clitoral stimulator

My biggest complaint about this toy, though? The sizing of the included harness/panty, without which the main function of the toy is unusable. UEROS claims this item is size inclusive, which is laughably untrue. It is adjustable, but only accommodates waist sizes of ~28″ to ~38″. Apparently it was “rigorously tested on diverse body types”, which means on women (presumably cis) between 5’3″ and 5’8″ and between 60 and 70kg. That’s not a diverse range of body types. That’s a difference of maybe two or three dress sizes, if that.

Crotchless panties/harness that comes with UEROS wearable vibrator set

If you’re going to design a toy that’s exclusively for thin people… well, first of all, don’t. But if you must, at least be honest about it. Claiming a demonstrably exclusionary product is size-inclusive doesn’t make it so.

Finally, the UEROS wearable vibe’s vibrations are nothing short of useless. They’re as weak and buzzy as they come. There is zero possibility of this toy ever giving me an orgasm, in any configuration. And believe me, I’ve tried.

Verdict

This is a product that is significantly better in theory than in practice. I don’t know if corners were cut to bring it to market faster or if it just wasn’t tested sufficiently, but there’s so much wrong with the execution of what is objectively a good idea.

The UEROS wearable vibe set could have been a great product. Unfortunately, in its current state, it just isn’t.

This set retails for $99.

Thanks to UEROS for sending me this product to review. All views are, as always, mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Header image for We-Vibe Sync O review featuring a purple background, multicoloured light ring and some purple plant leaves

[Toy Review] We-Vibe Sync O

Published on by Amy

Wearable vibrators are eternally popular, and every time I think I’ve seen every possible iteration on this theme something new comes along. With the promise of a toy you can use hands-free, a toy that can provide clitoral stimulation (which most people with vulvas need to orgasm) during penetrative sex, or a toy you can use in places where it would normally not be okay to use a sex toy, the allure of these types of products is obvious. It’s time to review the We-Vibe Sync O.

We-Vibe Sync O: Details

We-Vibe Sync O with its remote control

The We-Vibe Sync O is a remote-controlled and app-controlled vibrator. It is designed primarily to be worn during penetrative sex to provide extra clitoral stimulation. This U-shaped toy has a bendable hinge, allowing you to position it in the way that works for your body.

There’s a loop-shaped internal arm designed to hold it in place securely inside your body, and an external portion that rests against the vulva and clit. Design-wise, the We-Vibe Sync O is clearly a successor to other popular We-Vibe products such as the Sync and Chorus/Chorus Pro.

The insertable portion measures 3″ in length, and the clitoral arm measures about 4″.

The Sync O is made of body-safe silicone and available in two colours: green or purple. It is fully waterproof and submersible for use in the bath or shower, and USB rechargeable. You’ll get up to 150 minutes runtime from a full charge depending on which settings you’re using. You also get a little storage bag, but for some reason this isn’t really big enough to fit the toy, the remote, and the charging cable so it’s a bit pointless.

Let’s have a look at the pros and cons of the We-Vibe Sync O.

We-Vibe Sync O Review: What I Liked

We-Vibe Sync O

  • The Sync O’s vibrations are reasonably strong and rumbly
  • The hinged design makes it easy to position the vibrator comfortably
  • The remote control’s responsiveness is excellent and somewhat makes up for the annoying one-button interface (see below)
  • The product page says that the We-Vibe Sync O’s internal arm is designed to keep the toy securely in place. This is likely because the flexible silicone loop pushes outwards against the vaginal walls when you’re wearing it. I did find that it was less likely to fall out than other wearable toys I’ve tried (though the trade-off was some considerable discomfort – see below.)
  • The texturing on the underside of the clitoral arm adds an extra bit of friction and additional stimulation
  • The silicone is soft, smooth, and easy to clean
  • The Sync O is pretty quiet in use

What I Didn’t Like

We-Vibe Sync O

  • Companies always sell these toys as “hands free” but in my experience they rarely actually are. As with the Chorus, I found I needed to use my hand to hold the We-Vibe Sync O in place during use. Otherwise, it just slipped out of position and away from my clit, leading to an experience far more frustrating than pleasurable.
  • The single button interface on the toy itself limits your options if you don’t want to use the remote or the app.
  • I found the insertable loop really uncomfortable, bordering on painful, to wear. The sensation of having my vaginal walls pushed outwards was a bit like having a speculum inserted at the gyno (in other words, the least sexy thing imaginable.) Getting a penis or dildo inside me alongside it? No chance. This is a pretty major issue considering it’s the main selling point of the toy and renders it virtually unusable for me.

The We-Vibe App

The We-Vibe app is free to download on Android or iOS. Connecting your toy via Bluetooth is easy, with clear instructions, and takes less than 30 seconds. From there, you can select “Play” and make use of all the app’s functionalities including:

  • Single Vibe, which allows you to adjust the toy’s speed on a constant vibration setting
  • Multi vibe, which allows you to use up to four different settings and switch between them quickly
  • Touch mode, which was annoyingly useless (it’s supposed to change the vibrations based on your finger movements on the screen, but actually did the same lacklustre juddering vibration no matter where and how I pressed)
  • Beat, which syncs your toy to music.
  • Playlist, in which you can create your own personalised collection of settings in a specified order
  • Ambient, in which the toy responds and vibes along to ambient noise around you. For the record, I do not recommend using toys in public. Yes, people can probably tell, and yes, you’re probably making them uncomfortable.

The app’s responsiveness is generally good, and I found connectivity to be reliable. In practice I don’t really use apps to control toys that much – somehow, pulling out my phone mid-sex feels like it ruins the moment! The app offers some intriguing possibilities, but I don’t see myself actually using it very often.

I did not have the opportunity to test the app’s long-distance functionality as I no longer have a long-distance partner to try it with. However, I will say that my experience with the We-Vibe app’s distance features have been… a mix. With the Chorus, it worked beautifully. With the Rave 2, it didn’t work at all. I suspect this is due to app version upgrades rather than specific toys, though, as it’s the same basic tech in all of them.

We-Vibe Sync O Review: Verdict

Though I was impressed by the We-Vibe Sync O’s motor and bendable design, it’s let down hugely by the fact that I can’t actually wear it for any significant period of time as the insertable part just causes me pain. Of course, all bodies are different. You might not have any issue with wearing this toy at all – and the many rave reviews indicate that it works well for a lot of people!

This is really a “know your body” situation. If your vagina is more accommodating than mine and you’re looking for a wearable toy, it could be a great choice for you.

The We-Vibe Sync O retails for £159.99/$179 and is available from Lovehoney UK, Lovehoney US, Good Vibes, Babeland, Shevibe, or directly from We-Vibe Europe or North America.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the We-Vibe Sync O to review. All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Header image for sex position wedge article

5 Ways to Use a Sex Position Wedge

Published on by Amy

I recently received Lovehoney’s Ultimate Sex Position Enhancer Set, a two-piece set comprising a sex position wedge and ramp. Instead of doing a straightforward review, I thought I’d do something a little different and tell you about a few different ways you can use these items, from trying new sexual positions to using your wedge as a toy mount.

Sex furniture and sex position aids are having a moment in a big way, and I’ve been wanting to try some for ages. Turns out they are both enormous (Mr C&K when this thing arrived in a comically huge box: “Amy, where on EARTH are you going to keep it!?”) and surprisingly versatile.

Lovehoney Ultimate Sex Position Enhancer Wedge Set

This set consists of two pieces, a wedge and a ramp, that can be used together or separately. Both are 24″ wide, with the ramp measuring 34″ in length and 12″ in height and the wedge measuring 14″ in length and 7″ in height. Again: I did not fully grasp how huge these things are. Think very carefully before purchasing if you live in a tiny apartment or don’t have anywhere to store them!

Lovehoney sex position wedge and ramp combo
Lovehoney sex position wedge and ramp combo

The cushions are made of a firm and supportive foam, and covered with a micro-velvet cover that is fluid proof, removeable, and washable. So if you get sex fluids or lube all over it, just whip the cover off and wash it on a normal cycle in the washing machine. The exterior is also soft and non-slippery. I wish they came in a colour other than grey, but at least it’s fairly unobtrusive and will blend in with your decor.

The set retails for £249.99 ($299.99 US.)

5 Ways to Use a Sex Position Wedge or Other Sex Position Aid

There are so many creative ways to use a sex position wedge, position aid, or other types of sex furniture. Here are just a few of my faves.

Try Different Sexual Positions with Your Wedge

This is perhaps the most obvious use for a piece of sex furniture such as a sex position wedge. It is, presumably, what they were originally designed for. But whether you’re having penis-in-vagina, anal, or strap-on sex, a wedge or ramp can make it easier and more comfortable to get into all kinds of sexual positions.

I hear they can be particularly good for missionary position vaginal sex, raising the receiver’s hips to allow for deeper penetration and more precise G-spot stimulation. They’re also great for legs-up positions and for cushioning the knees during receiver-on-top positions.

Make Oral Sex Easier

Do you love going down on your partner for hours but find that neck strain is an issue for you? Yeah, me too (I often use the edge of the bed for this reason, which can work well.) But a positioning aid can be a game changer in this area.

A sex position wedge under the receiver’s hips can make their genitals more accessible and make it more comfortable for the giver. That way, you can lick or suck for as long as you like in absolute comfort.

Get Comfy During Masturbation

Do you ever find it difficult to get comfortable in one position while you’re masturbating, particularly during a long session or if it takes you a while to get off? If so, try using your sex position wedge or ramp to experiment with different positions.

Personally, I find reclining on the ramp while using the wedge to prop up my upper back and neck supremely comfy. Your mileage may vary, of course.

Have Sex on the Floor… In Style

Sometimes you just want to get all primal and fuck on the floor… but then find the idea is better in theory than in practice. Carpet burn or hard wooden floors against your knees? No thanks. But get the ramp and wedge out, and suddenly you’ve got a ready made sex couch wherever you want to put it!

Use It as a Toy Mount

If you enjoy grinding toys, a sex position wedge can make an ideal toy mount. I find the wedge works particularly well with my Godemiche Grind Pads and Vibe Pads. Just fasten them to the wedge with the straps provided, position it underneath you, and you’re good to go.

Of course, you can also get creative with all kinds of sex toys. If you can find a way to hold it in place (I recommend those same straps or a length of rope,) the wedge also works brilliantly as a wand mount.

Bonus: Use It For Totally Unsexy Things

Mine is currently propping up a wet mattress in my guest room while it dries out. It’s… a long story.

Thanks to Lovehoney for supplying me with the product featured in this post to share with you all. All views, as always, are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post. Product images: Lovehoney.

Two condoms in red packets. Header image for a post on rejecting the term fluid bonding

Why I’m No Longer Using the Term “Fluid Bonding”

Published on by Amy

In the decade and a half I’ve been non-monogamous, I’ve had numerous conversations about so-called “fluid bonding.” I’ve negotiated the circumstances under which it is okay, not-okay, and maybe-okay to do it in various relationships. I have discussed the potential risks brought about by myself, my partners, or even my metamours choosing to fluid bond in certain relationships, and how those impacted might protect their sexual health. I’ve had literally hundreds of conversations involving this subject.

And I’m rejecting the term. When I talk about barriers, safer sex practices, and sexual health, I will no longer be using the term “fluid bonding.”

Here’s why.

First, What is Fluid Bonding?

If you ask ten polyamorous people what “fluid bonding” means, most of them will probably tell you something like “having sex without barriers.” In practice, though, the term’s most widely-used and accepted definition is narrower than that.

When most people say “fluid bonding,” they are referring to the act of having penetrative penis-in-vagina (or, less commonly, penis-in-anus) sex without a condom.

“Fluid Bonding” is Vague

Under the above definition, I have only ever “fluid bonded” with two people in my entire life. But that feels like a ridiculous, reductive, and wildly inaccurate assessment of how I have had sex over the years.

But the term “fluid bonding” is inherently vague. Though there’s the commonly-used definition I outlined above, I’ve seen plenty of instances where people thought they were on the same page about its meaning but were not. This can lead to hurt, anger, and feelings of violation and betrayal as well as people’s safer sex boundaries being inadvertently violated.

When we assume we all use a term in the same way, miscommunications are inevitable. Nowadays, if a partner or prospective partner tell me they’re “fluid bonded” with this or that person, or expresses a desire to fluid bond with me, I’m going to be asking far more questions rather than assuming I know what they mean.

Vague Terminology Makes it Harder to Have Accurate Safer Sex Conversations

Here’s the reality: semen is one bodily fluid, but not the only one. And semen going into a vagina is just one way of sharing bodily fluids in a sexual relationship. It’s also only one possible way to contract an STI.

If you’re having oral sex without a condom, dam, or other barrier, you are exhanging fluids. If you are touching your partner and then yourself with your hands (or touching more than one partner’s genitals in one session) without changing gloves or handwashing in between, you are exchanging fluids. Any kind of kink activity involving blood, such as needle play, is a fluid exchange risk. Hell, even saliva is a bodily fluid. So if we’re getting really technical about it, kissing is a form of fluid exchange. It’s a low risk one, admittedly, but some STIs can be transmitted in this way. Sharing toys creates risk. And for some STIs to spread, skin-to-skin contact is all you need.

I’m not telling you any of this to scare you. Quite the opposite, actually. STIs carry a heavy stigma but most of them are also easily avoidable, treatable, or manageable. I’m telling you this because having the correct information is how we can all make better choices to keep ourselves and our lovers safe and healthy. Regular testing, clear and specific negotiations about barrier use or lack thereof, and knowing the facts is how we do that.

I’ve also seen people, particularly non-monogamy newbies and those not clued up on sexual health, assume that if they are not “fluid bonded” (i.e. having unbarriered intercourse with a penis) with any of their partners, then they are free from any sexual health risk and can eschew testing. The reality is that anyone who is sexually active should be testing at least occasionally, if not regularly.

Continuing to use this term makes it harder to have accurate conversations about sexual health. It perpetuates the idea that penetrative sex with a penis is the only form of sex that carries a risk. This belief is simply inaccurate and frankly dangerous. It prevents people from being fully informed and protecting their sexual health accordingly.

“Fluid Bonding” is Heterocentric and Cissexist

Part of rejecting “fluid bonding” is tied to my broader and long-standing desire to completely decentre penetrative sex with a penis as some kind of pinnacle of sexual experience. Penis-in-vagina intercourse is one type of sex. It’s not “full” sex (look out for my rant on that subject, coming soon to a sex blog near you!) It’s not “real” sex. When we centre it above other activities in our discussions about sex, we are perpetuating cisheteronormativity.

When we talk about “fluid bonding”, we are assuming that one partner in the equation has a penis and the other has a vulva. This may or may not be true. Further, even if this does happen to be the combination of bodies we’re working with, penis-in-vagina (or anus) intercourse may or may not be a part of that couple’s sexual relationship.

This is heterocentric. It is also cissexist. In reality, relationships can include any combination of gender identities and genital types that you can think of. In reality, penetrative sex is a part of some sexual relationships but not all. And any sexual relationship likely involves at least some form of fluid exchange unless you’re covering your entire bodies in latex prior to sex and not kissing.

The vast majority of the sex I have outside of my nesting relationship is with other people with vulvas. This sex still carries risk, and sexual health is still a consideration. Many queer and sapphic women assume sexual health concerns don’t apply to them because of heteronormative narratives around so-called “fluid bonding.” This directly increases their sexual health risks.

“Fluid Bonding” is Emotionally Loaded

If having unbarriered sex with your partners is emotionally meaningful to you, I’m not going to tell you it shouldn’t be. I also prefer to have unbarriered sex in situations where it feels safe and comfortable to do so! As I said, I’ve only had unbarriered penis-in-vagina sex with two people in my entire life. This should tell you that I do not, personally, consider it trivial.

However, I think we should be very, very careful about applying emotionally loaded terms to conversations about safer sex.

A relationship with Partner A isn’t less emotionally meaningful than a relationship with Partner B just because you use barriers with one partner and not the other. There are so many reasons you could make this choice. Perhaps one partner has much more casual sex outside of your relationship and using barriers makes you feel safer. Maybe you or one of your partners is trying to get pregnant in one relationship but not another. Perhaps one penis-owning person has had a vasectomy and another hasn’t. So many possible reasons, and none of them are “I love this person more than that person.”

With that said, some people do use so-called fluid bonding as a sign of emotional significance in a relationship. Again, I’m not going to tell you that you shouldn’t do this. The emotional weight you apply to sexual decisions is highly personal and up to you to negotiate with your partner(s.)

However, I believe the term “fluid bonding” automatically confers this emotional weight, whether or not the people in question believe in or experience it. That feeds into problematic (and often heteronormative and mononormative) assumptions about which sex acts do and don’t carry emotional significance.

Sex without a barrier is not inherently more connective (or “bonding”) than sex with one.

So What Am I Using Instead?

In rejecting this term, my goal is to get far more accurate and specific in my conversations about sexual health. It might seem useful to have a shorthand at first glance. But, as we’ve seen, that shorthand is so imprecise as to be functionally useless.

So instead, when negotiating sexual health, I’ll talk about what I am actually doing with whom. How many people am I having sex with? What barriers am I using or not using for which activities? How often and in which circumstances do I have casual sex, and what precautions am I taking when I do? How often do I and my partners test, and what were our most recent results? And so on.

Does it take longer? Sure. Is it a little clunkier? Yes. Can it feel more vulnerable, or even embarrassing, to get so specific? Yes. But it’s a hell of a lot more useful for everyone.

FYI: this post contains affiliate links.

A woman straddling a man. She is wearing red lingerie and he is unhooking her bra. Text reads: Godemiche Grind Ring Review

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Rings

Published on by Amy1 Comment

Back in the day, Godemiche’s Twitter bio said that their goal was “not to break the mold, but recolour it.” Their Ambit is a simple yet near-perfect dildo, and they offer an array of body-safe dildos, plugs, strokers, gags and more in a dizzying array of colours and combinations. But despite this stated aim, the Godemiche Grind Ring really does break a few molds.

In a world of endless knock-offs and derivatives, it is so refreshing when I see sex toy designers doing something genuinely new and innovative. And I have never come across anything quite like the Grind Ring before. But what is a Grind Ring, how does it work, and—most importantly—is it good?

What is a Grind Ring?

A Grind Ring is a piece of silicone shaped a bit like a pizza slice, with a hole designed to fit around the penis or dildo during penetrative sex. Its main purpose is to provide extra external stimulation to a person with a clitoris. Each of these innovative clit grinders has a raised mound covered in one of nine textures.

Each Grind Ring measures 6″ in length and 4.3″ across at the widest point, and feature a stretchy hole for a penis or dildo to fit through at the base.

In Godemiche’s words:

The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding. Dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

This review covers the original “low grind” Grind Ring in its nine available textures as well as one of the “high grind” variations. There are also Dual Density and Dual Texture Grind Rings available.

So How Does it Work?

Most people with vulvas need sustained clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, which penis-in-vagina intercourse doesn’t always provide. The main purpose of a Grind Ring, as I mentioned above, is to provide that clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex. So, naturally, Mr C&K and I began by testing it that way.

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone sex toy in Bubbles and Waves
Feat. “Bumps” in Aquamarine and “Waves” in Pastel Pearlescent Green

After trying a few different positions, we concluded that by far the most effective way to use this toy was with me on top. This allowed me to effectively grind down against the textured surface. However, any position that involves a lot of close, face-to-face bodily contact works pretty well. Positions with more space between bodies tend to make the Grind Ring flap around and slip out of position.

While using a Grind Ring did not get me to orgasm during penetrative sex (the stimulation was a little too inconsistent for that), it did up the intensity and add a lot of additional pleasure.

Other Ways to Use These Toys

The fun thing about sex toys is that you don’t have to just use them in the way they were originally designed to be used. Wand vibrators on penises or clitoral suckers on nipples, anyone?

The Grind Ring (or any pussy grinder, for that matter) is no different.

Girl on the Net posted a brilliant piece about using it “wrong” (there’s obviously no such thing!) and I was inspired to try her “textured Doxy wank” idea[1].

Doxy Die Cast with Godemiche Bubbles Grind Ring
Feat. Doxy Die Cast

You might also want to try:

  • Using the Grind Ring as an addition to hand sex, either on yourself or your partner
  • Placing the Grind Ring underneath you on a chair or other firm surface
  • Lying on top of the Grind Ring on your bed
  • Experimenting with positions using pillows, positioning wedges, or toy mounts
  • Putting a little clitoral balm or stimulating lube on your Grind Ring before you start
Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring with Lovehoney clitoral balm
Pictured with Lovehoney Ignite Pleasure Balm.

[1] Since I initially wrote this review, Godemiche have added textured Doxy and Magic Wand attachment heads to their line-up!

Let’s dive into the review of the various Grind Ring textures.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Waves”

Godemiche Waves Grind Ring clitoral sex toy

I received the Waves Grind Ring in gorgeous pastel pearlescent green.

This Grind Ring was perhaps the biggest surprise of the range. After feeling how soft its silicone ripples are, I wasn’t sure how much I’d be able to feel them. But when I ground against them, especially when they had a firm surface underneath, they felt like a series of repeated licks from dozens of little silicone tongues. Since the waves are so close together and flex as you rub against them, it offers a smooth, flowing, continuous sensation.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Bumps”

Godemiche Bumps Grind Ring sex toy for clit

I received this one in Aquamarine, a deep sea-green shade.

The Bumps Grind Ring is the perfect middle ground in terms of intensity compared to others in the range. The little nodules are small and quite close together so whichever way I move against them, several of them are always making contact with my clit from various angles. This one works best for long, slow, back-and-forth movements.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Bubbles”

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone clitoral stimulator in Bubbles

I received the Bubbles Grind Ring in a shade of watery blue known as “Reefs Water.”

This was actually the first Grind Ring Mr C&K and I tried as an addition to penetrative sex. I had a feeling this one would be gentle, which it was and it wasn’t. This one is ultra smooth and offers a squishy “bounce” when you move against it. Rather than the licking sensation of the Waves or the flicky back-and-forth of the Pills and Spikes, the main sensation of the Bubbles is one of pressure.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Spikes”

Godemiche Grind Ring clitoral stimulator in Spikes

I received the Spikes Grind Ring in a vibrant shade of orange known as “Dragon’s Breath.”

My first thought when I saw this texture was “eek”. The Spikes Grind Ring looked like it might be too intense for my sensitive clit. As it turns out, that’s the case sometimes but not always. I have to be in a specific mood for the Spikes Grind Ring, and that mood is “craving something so intense it’s almost too much”. It’s not painful, as the silicone is indeed very soft and squishy. It’s just… a lot.

The Spikes Grind Ring creates a teasing, unpredictable flicking sensation. One amazing thing I discovered about this one: if I lay it across my vulva and use a powerful vibrator over the top of it, the tips of the spikes transmit the vibrations in very interesting ways.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Hearts”

Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring, Valentine's Day sex toy

I knew I wanted my Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring in a Valentine’s-themed colour, so I opted for this shimmery pinkish-red known as “Ruby Rose.”

The Hearts Grind Ring feels somewhat similar to the Bubbles. It offers a similar kind of deep pressure when you grind against it, but the larger and flatter surface of the hearts makes it feel a little less bouncy. Due to the shape of the hearts, I find that this texture is more intense on the downward motion than on the upward motion.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Pyramids”

Pyramid Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings from Godemiche
“Pyramids” (left) and “Tall Pyramids” (right)

I received the Pyramids Grind Ring in a green and burgundy/purple swirl colourway called “Garden Party.”

Adam from Godemiche says that the Pyramids Grind Ring texture was “inspired by a belt I happened to see someone wearing while out grocery shopping. It reminded me of my skater boy days when none of my trousers fit and I often opted for a studded belt to keep them around my thighs.” If you can’t picture what he means, think something like this.

I expected the Pyramids to feel a lot like the Spikes, but they don’t. They’re less flexible and, though they’re still soft, they have a firmer texture. The overall sensation is more targeted, deeper, and less “flicky.”

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Tall Pyramids”

Godemiche Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings
“Tall Pyramids” (right) and “Spikes” (left)

I received the Tall Pyramid Spikes in a reddish-purple shade called “Winter Berry.”

As you can see in the above picture, these tall pyramid spikes are noticeably smaller than those on the Spikes ring. So though that’s probably the closet comparison in terms of sensation, they’re really quite different.

The Tall Pyramids are very soft and very flexible, and they really don’t feel “pointy” at all. You can get a range of sensations from this one: if I grind down hard against it, I get an all-over rubbing sensation, whereas if I support some of my weight and just glide my vulva along it, it’s more of a gentle tickle.

I think I like this texture best because you get constant stimulation as the spikes slide along your vulva. The flicking of the little pyramids feel like dozens of little silicone tongues lapping at and around my clit.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Pills”

Godemiche Grind Ring in Pills texture

I received the Pills Grind Ring in “Green UV,” one of Godemiche’s brightest shades.

This is perhaps the softest of all the Grind Ring textures, and Godemiche recommends it as a suitable texture for beginners to grinding toy. The Pills texture offers a flicking sensation similar to the Spikes and Tall Pyramids, but far softer. Even when you grind down hard into it, the overall sensation is still pretty light. This one borders on tickly.

I often reach for the Pills Grind Ring at the start of a session because it’s a great warm-up texture.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Tall Waves”

Godemiche Grind Ring in Tall Waves texture

I received the Tall Waves ring in Godemiche Purple, the company’s signature shade.

The Tall Waves is a twist on the original Waves texture, only with higher ridges. Like the original Waves, this one offers continuous, rhythmic back-and-forth thanks to the softness and close placement of the silicone tongues. This one is soft enough for a long session but intense enough that it usually doesn’t take very long at all to get me off.

Godemiche Grind Ring Tall Waves

High Grind Ring: “Bubbles”

Godemiche High Grind Ring

Godemiche’s High Grind Ring variation is different from the original design in one important way: it has “a much larger mound designed to bring the texture even closer to your body while being designed to be comfortable on your genitals.”

Other than that, it’s the same Grind Ring design you know and love. I received the High Grind Ring in the Bubbles texture, which was the only one available at the time. It’s now also available in “Spikes,” “Tall Waves,” and a new texture known as “Suckers.”

Bubbles isn’t a Grind Ring texture I reach for super often as it’s a little too gentle for me. But the more raised style of the High Grind Ring adds a little more of the intensity I was seeking. The silicone mound provides more to grind against and is firm enough to offer significant pressure.

Interestingly, due to the more raised mound, the High Grind provides slightly more focused clitoral pressure and slightly less in terms of broad, all-over vulva stimulation. This isn’t necessarily a good or bad thing. It’s just different, and you should take your own preferences into account when deciding whether the Low Grind or High Grind will work best for you.

Verdict

I still love the absolute fuck out of these toys. They’re innovative, they’re versatile, and they’re shockingly effective.

Totally fucking brilliant. I am obsessed with the Godemiche Grind Rings and I will be shouting about them to anyone who will listen.

Grind Rings start from £39.99. Custom colours, a higher mound, or adding a vibrating “V-Plate” all increase the cost.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me these toys to review. Affiliate links appear in this post. All views, as ever, are my own.

Position of the Week header

[Book Review] “Position of the Week” from Lovehoney

Published on by Amy

Today’s review is something a bit different: instead of a toy, wearable item, or piece of kink gear, we’re looking at the Position of the Week book from Lovehoney. (Or, as I think it should be called, “Borderline Impossible Sex Positions for Improbably Athletic Straight People.”) Let’s get into it.

What is Position of the Week?

Position of the Week is a book of 52 sex positions (the idea being that there’s one for each week for a year. It’s a pocket-sized hardback book.

Position of the Week book

Each double-page spread includes a silhouette-style drawing of a couple having sex in the given position on the left page. The right page gives the position number, name, and a brief description.

Who Is Position of the Week For?

This book is very, very heterosexual.

Every position is designed with a cisgender male/female couple having penetrative (penis-in-vagina) sex in mind. The illustrations even feature a woman drawn in pink and a man drawn in blue. There’s also a lot of gendered language throughout (“he does X, she does Y”, “girl power”, and so on.) I

Seriously, it’s so freaking straight I can feel my queerness leaking out all over its pages.

Pages from the Position of the Week book

A lot of the positions in this book would actually work for different body and genital configurations. Many of the positions would work just as well for two vulva owners using a strap-on, or for anal sex with any configuration of bodies.

So queer and trans folks absolutely could use it. But the language and the whole aesthetic is so cisheteronormative that it feels completely alienating as a queer person.

On the 3rd page, after the welcome but before the positions start, you get a little consent disclaimer. This states that you should talk before trying something new, that everything must be 100% consensual, and that you should stop if anything hurts or is uncomfortable.

It’s pretty much Consent 101 summed up in 33 words. But you know what? I’m here for it. Because fundamentally, this book isn’t for people like me. It’s not aimed at sex nerds who engage in non-traditional relationships and have long and nuanced conversations about sexuality out of academic as well as personal interest. This book is for people who are likely newer to sexual experimentation, many of whom might understand that consent is important but not have a sophisticated understanding of exactly what that means or how to talk about it.

Basically, what Lovehoney have done with this little one-pager helps to normalise and demystify consent conversations. And I’m very here for that.

So About the Actual Sex Positions, From Obvious to Impossible

Some of the positions in this book are pretty good. We have some obvious-but-decent classics (doggy style, sit-down sex, spooning) and some creative interpretations on classics like reverse cowgirl and standing sex.

Others, though, were definitely created for the athletically-inclined. No. 30 (“the Can-Can”) requires the person being penetrated to be able to get their foot on their partner’s shoulder while standing. That’s not a sex position, that’s a workout, and not one that’s going to be possible for the vast majority of bodies.

Pages from the Position of the Week book

Positions like the “Standing Thrust” and “Up Against It” require the penetrating partner to be able to support most or all of their partner’s weight while thrusting. Again: for most people this is just not going to happen. And I’m going to go ahead and call sex position No. 47 (“the Raunchy Rider”) physiologically impossible for 99% of people.

Pages from the Sex Position of the Week book showing an impossible sex position

This book clearly assumes that women are tiny, petite, and flexible, while men are muscular and strong. If that’s not you, it can lead to some pretty negative body feelings. (And it’s not most of us, by the way!)

On the plus side, a number of the position descriptions reference clitoral stimulation, which the vast majority of people with vulvas need in order to get off. So that’s something.

Verdict

Meh.

If you’re cisgender, heterosexual, skinny/strong, and athletic, you’ll probably get something from it. Otherwise, you might find a few interesting sex position ideas but largely be left thinking “…yeah but my body doesn’t work that way” (or “that is straight up impossible.)

Position of the Week retails for £6.99 from Lovehoney ($8.99 US). A fun stocking-stuffer if you’re within the very specific demographic it caters to. Otherwise, don’t bother.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product to review! Views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Pills spilling out of an orange bottle on a blue background. Text reads: Nagivating sexual side effects

Sexual Side Effects: How to Have Sex if Medication is Getting in the Way of Your Pleasure

Published on by Amy

Unfortunately, sexual side effects are incredibly common with numerous types of medication. Antidepressants and other mental health medications including SSRIs and MOAIs, blood pressure medications, ADHD medications, and certain hormonal therapies are just some of the commonly prescribed medical treatments that can affect sex drive, orgasm, and sexual function.

Sexual side effects can include loss of desire, low arousal, erectile issues, pain during sex, and anorgasmia. Obviously, not everyone who takes medication experiences these issues and not everyone will experience them to the same extent. They can also naturally occur as a result of ageing, stress, physical health issues, and so on. But they are super common. In this post, I’ll share some strategies that can help you to manage them and continue to access sexual pleasure, if you want to.

Note: I am not a medical professional, so I have kept my advice here to sex and relationships advice, not medical advice. If you have any medical concerns or queries, see your doctor.

Talk to Your Doctor About Sexual Side Effects

You shouldn’t have to choose between the right medication and a happy and pleasurable sex life. You should be able to have both! So if you’re suffering from sexual side effects, talk to your doctor. My doctor once told me to stay on my antidepressants even though they killed my sex drive and appetite. I ignored that advice and ultimately switched to a different doctor (and a different drug.)

A good provider will work with you to find a medication solution that helps you without damaging your sex life. This might mean adjusting your dose, trying a different drug, or implementing other strategies to combat the sexual side effects. If your doctor dismisses you or doesn’t think sexual pleasure is important, go to a different doctor.

Sex matters. For many of us, it’s a quality of life issue. You deserve to get medical support and be taken seriously.

Get Creative and Expand Your Definition of Sex

Perhaps you can’t or don’t want to change your medication right now (or ever), but you also want to start enjoying sex again. If so, I invite you to think about your definition of sex. When you think of sex, are you thinking exclusively about penetrative intercourse or another specific activity?

Getting creative, exploring different kinds of touch, and expanding your definition of sex can all be great ways to sidestep sexual side effects and find new ways to access pleasure and sensuality.

What if sex didn’t need to involve penetration? What if there was no pressure for anyone to have an orgasm, and you could just enjoy touch and sensation without racing towards any particular goal? If it didn’t matter whether a cock got hard or a pussy got wet? Paradoxically, removing the focus from things like penetration, erection, or orgasm can actually make those things easier. Don’t underestimate the power of taking the pressure off.

Intimate connection doesn’t even need to involve your genitals! What if you spent an entire session just kissing and making out, focusing on nipple play, trading massages? What if a kink scene, whether that involves flogging or shibari or candle wax or sensation play or power exchange, was the main event rather than an appetiser? When you step away from what you assume sex is, you discover all the things pleasure can be.

Experiment with Toys

Sex toys are amazing for so many reasons! (That’s why I turned talking about them into a career.) One of the ways they’re amazing? They can help to overcome or navigate sexual side effects by offering different kinds and intensities of sensation.

If you’re struggling with a loss of sensation, powerful vibrators can help. When I suffered from anorgasmia and a reduced sex drive due to antidepressants, a wand vibrator helped me to break through the block. Some people with a clitoris find that the focused intensity of suction toys works well when sensitivity is low. If you have a penis and your medication makes it difficult to get or stay hard, a toy like the Hot Octopuss Pulse – which can be used from either erect or flaccid – can be a great choice. If you want to have penetrative sex, a strap-on, fucking machine, thrusting toy, or dildo can facilitate it.

If pain during sex is an issue, toys and accessories can also help. The OhNut is an amazing invention that limits the depth of penetration with a penis or dildo, and dilators can help to gently stretch and relax your vaginal tissue.

Explore Self-Touch

Learning to navigate sexual side effects and adjusting to your body’s new normal can be a process. Whether or not you have a partner, this is a great time to explore self-touch. You might want to experiment with masturbating in different ways (such as in a new position or with toys), experiment with mindful masturbation, or perhaps just touch your body in whatever ways feel good to you.

Talk About Your Sexual Side Effects with Your Lover(s)

Too many of us have, at some point, struggled through sex that was not pleasurable or even sex that was painful. Perhaps we felt pressured, perhaps we didn’t want to let our partner down, or perhaps we believed that maybe we’d “get into it” if we just kept going. I understand the urge, but you deserve so much more than suffering through uncomfortable or painful sex.

A partner who loves and respects you will want to understand your experience and support you. Great sex with a partner is a collaborative process. It begins with honesty and vulnerability, so – as long as you’re in a safe and trusting relationship – talk to your partner(s) about how you’re feeling, what’s going on for you, and how you’d like to address it. If you want them to do or not to something specific, ask for it. If you just want their patience and understanding while you adjust, ask for that.

Fight Shame and Self-Blame

Sexual side effects often bring a lot of shame. You might feel as though there’s something wrong with you, or worry that you’re letting your partner(s) down. Some people even feel as though their masculinity, femininity, or sense of sexual identity is threatened.

There is absolutely no shame in what you’re going through right now. Orgasm problems and loss of sex drive are still stigmatised and, unfortunately, so are certain types of medication such as antidepressants. However, please try to avoid getting into a shame cycle or blaming yourself. But sexual side effects are incredibly normal, and most of us will be on medication that will impact our sexuality at some point in our lives.

If you’re struggling with shame, reach out to others who have had similar experiences, ask your partner(s) for reassurance and support, or talk to a therapist.

Check Out These Resources to Help You Navigate Sexual Side Effects

Wherever you are in your journey with medication and navigating sexual side effects, these are a few resources I recommend. As always, pick the ones that sound most useful to you!

If you find my work useful, you can help me keep doing this by buying me a coffee! This post contains affiliate links.

We-Vibe Chorus review header image featuring the toy, remote, and a smartphone

[Toy Review] We-Vibe Chorus

Published on by Amy1 Comment

Update 2026: a new version of this classic toy for couples, the We-Vibe Chorus Pro, is now out! I have left this We-Vibe Chorus review up because this older version is still available from some retailers.

There are a number of buzzwords and phrases, frequently used to describe sex toys, of which I am highly sceptical. One of these is “for couples”. Another is “hands free”. The We-Vibe Chorus claims to be both of these things. However, my experiences with We-Vibe over the years have been almost universally positive, so with my hopeful-but-ready-to-be-disappointed face firmly in place, I set out to test the new We-Vibe Chorus for you all.

What is the We-Vibe Chorus Vibrator for Couples?

Official product image for We-Vibe Chorus vibrator for couples review

The We-Vibe Chorus is a wearable vibrator with two arms: one that sits inside the vagina, and another that rests against the clitoris. The idea is that it provides extra clitoral stimulation for the wearer during penetrative sex.

Inside you’ll find the toy and remote, a charging cable, and a dock that functions as both travel case and charging station. The Chorus is IPX7 waterproof (i.e. submersible) and USB rechargeable, with a full charge giving around 90 minutes of runtime.

The We-Vibe Chorus is made of soft and squishy matte silicone and comes in three colours. Mine is “Cosmic Pink.” It has a sort of shiny-sparkly effect that’s really pretty.

We-Vibe Chorus Review: What’s New?

The Chorus is the latest iteration of We-Vibe’s signature “wearable” vibrators designed for (primarily cishetero) couples. But how is this one different?

The We-Vibe Chorus and remote

The most obvious upgrade, when we compare the Chorus to the Sync (its most recent predecessor,) is the introduction of the squeeze remote. The tighter you squeeze the remote, the more intense the vibration gets. You can turn squeeze control off with the small button at the top of your remote if you don’t like it.

There’s also new touch-sense tech, which responds to your movements against the sensor and changes the intensity of the vibrations to match depending on which setting you’ve selected. You can turn touch-sense off through the We-Connect app, if you want to. Overall, I found this function’s responsiveness too unpredictable to be pleasurable, and quickly turned it off.

Another significant upgrade to this model is that it is adjustable in two places. Not only can you adjust the distance between the two arms, you can also alter the angle of the internal arm for a more comfortable and stimulating fit. Bodies come in a wide range of shapes and sizes, and one size will never fit all. I find getting poked in the vaginal walls off-putting and the opposite of erotic (weird, I know!) so being able to adjust the Chorus to actually sit comfortably in my body was a game-changer.

Finally, the Chorus is the first We-Vibe product to use a mix of AnkorLink and Bluetooth technology to connect it to the We-Connect app. The difference here was extremely noticeable when I compared the Chorus to earlier We-Vibe products I’ve reviewed. The connection was much more stable and the responses much more consistent.

In conclusion, the Chorus might superficially resemble We-Vibe’s previous offerings, but you get so much more bang for your buck.

In Use for Couples (and Solo Players)

I’ve said before that I find the marketing of “toys for couples” annoying. A toy for a couple is literally anything you use with a partner! Also, that particular phrase generally means “toys you wear during penis-in-vagina intercourse,” which betrays such a narrow understanding of 1) what a couple is and 2) what sex is.

That notwithstanding, the We-Vibe Chorus is a good option if you’re a couple looking for a toy to wear during penetrative sex. The slender and adjustable internal arm makes for a comfortable fit for all different kinds of vulvas and the external arm provides powerful clitoral stimulation (which 70-90% of vulva-owners need to reach orgasm) through a strong and rumbly motor.

It’s not truly hands-free, though, as it does slip around if you’re doing some particularly vigorous thrusting. However I adjusted it, I could not get it to stay firmly in place. Every time I moved more than a little, it would shift and move away from my clit. I ended up using one hand to hold it in place and the other hand to operate the remote.

Worth noting: the lovely Phallophile Reviews suggests that wearing tight knickers (such as Spanx) helps the We-Vibe Chorus stay in place if you want a truly hands-free experience. So that’s something to try!

Do You Need to Use the App to Enjoy this Toy?

Not really!

I tested the app to write this We-Vibe Chorus review but I haven’t used it since (and I have absolutely used the toy since.)

The We-Vibe app is a nice extra, and adds some bonus options such as handing over control to a partner from anywhere in the world, creating your own vibration patterns, and video calling or text chatting. However, you don’t need it and the remote control is more than adequate for controlling the toy if using an app doesn’t sound fun or sexy to you.

We-Vibe Chorus Review: Verdict

Overall, I’m seriously impressed with the Chorus! Despite the hands-free issues, it has a great motor and comes with numerous additional features.

The We-Vibe Chorus is available from Shevibe and directly from We-Vibe (North America or Europe.)

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product to review! All opinions are my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Header image for Hot Octopuss Atom review

[Toy Review] Hot Octopuss Atom Cock Ring

Published on by Amy

The purpose of a cock ring is simple: by constricting blood flow out of the penis, enabling a stronger and more consistent erection. Vibrating cock rings have built on this by adding stimulation for the wearer and, if worn during penetrative sex, for their partner. It’s a simple premise, but one that is so often executed really badly. Would the Hot Octopuss Atom, the so-called “next generation in cock rings,” break the mold? I received one to review, so let’s find out.

Hot Octopuss Atom cock ring
Image: Hot Octopuss

Hot Octopuss Atom

The Hot Octopuss Atom is a stretchy black silicone ring. There’s a large contact area with a raised nub at one end, designed to sit against the clitoris of the wearer’s partner during penetrative sex. The Atom is adorned with a simple silver-coloured plastic band featuring the speed buttons and the company’s crown logo. The company name is also stamped into the silicone. A drawstring storage bag is provided.

The Atom is USB rechargeable and waterproof. It has five vibration patterns as well as constant vibrations, each of which can be used on any of five speeds.

A word for those with girthier cocks: you’re gonna need lube, friends! This ring’s diameter is only about 1.5″. It is stretchy to accommodate most sizes, but getting it on can be a challenge if you’re not adequately lubricated.

Hot Octopuss Atom Review: What We Loved

Mr C&K and I tested out this toy together. Let’s start with the things we liked.

Most importantly, the Hot Octopuss Atom boasts by far the strongest vibrations I have ever felt from a cock-ring. They are powerful, rumbly, and satisfying on all levels. I love the additional clitoral contact and focused stimulation provided by the “nub.”

Ultimately, I’m unlikely to have an orgasm from a vibrating cock ring used in the traditional way. Unless my partner puts their penis inside me and then just sort of stays still, there isn’t the level of sustained clitoral contact required to get me there. So I have learned to manage my expectations. Even so, it adds an enjoyable extra later of stimulation for both of us.

It was also tight enough to actually have the desired effect of allowing my partner to maintain a stronger, harder and longer-lasting erection.

What We Didn’t Love

The biggest problem with this toy, from my perspective, is in the placement of the buttons. The two speed buttons are situated on either end of the plastic band across the top of the toy. This means that changing the settings during penetrative sex is difficult and will almost certainly interrupt your flow. We had to pause to look more closely at which button was which, and then to switch settings. This could be easily remedied with a remote control.

There is also quite a large seam where the plastic band connects to the main body of the toy. This area could easily be a germ trap, harbouring fluids and bacteria, so take the time to clean it properly.

Atom or Atom Plus?

Hot Octopuss actually released two cock-rings last year, the Atom and the Atom Plus. Though I have not reviewed the Plus, I will tell you what I know about it to help you make an informed decision. The main differences between the Atom and Atom Plus are:

  • The Atom features one motor primarily designed for clitoral stimulation, while the Atom Plus has two. The second motor offers stimulation of the perineum, the area between the testicles and anus, which is extremely pleasurable for many people.
  • The Atom is worn around the shaft of the penis, whereas the Plus fits around both the penis and testicles.
  • The Plus is, of course, physically bigger and more expensive (at the time of writing it retails for £69.95 to the Atom’s £49.95.)

Hot Octopuss Atom Review: Verdict

There are far too few quality, body-safe toys with good motors on the market for people with penises. Hot Octopuss are ahead of the curve in redressing that balance. If you’re looking for some additional clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex, or if you’ve tried vibrating cock rings in the past and found their motors too weak for you, give the Atom a try.

Mr C&K concluded that the Hot Octopuss Atom is “hands down the best cock-ring I have ever used!”

The Hot Octopuss Atom is available directly from the manufacturer as well as from retailers such as Shevibe, Good Vibes, Babeland, and The Pleasure Garden.

A banner ad for sex toy company Hot Octopuss, who sponsored a post on sex and mental health
Image: Hot Octopuss

Thank you to Hot Octopuss for sending me the Atom cock ring to review. All views are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.