[Toy Reviews] Funzze 3-in-1 Sucking & Flapping Thrusting Triple Stimulator

We might be coming to the end of Black Friday/Cyber Monday weekend, but the sex toy deals aren’t over yet! Funzze, who have kindly sponsored this post, have a series of discounts that increase depending on how much you spend:

  • 40% off orders $80+ with code: BF40
  • 30% off orders $50+ with code: BF30
  • 20% off orders $30+ with code: BF20
Funzze 2024 Black Friday banner
Banner: Funzze

In all cases, just enter the code at checkout to get your discount up until 2 December.

With that said, let’s get into today’s review of Funzze’s 3-in-1 triple stimulator vibrator/sucker/thruster.

What is the Funzze 3-in-1 Triple Stimulator Vibrator?

The Funzze 3-in-1 Sucking & Flapping Thrusting Vibrator (hereafter the Funzze 3-in-1 for the sake of brevity) is a triple stimulator that offers three different ways to use it. Its head end features a clitoral suction stimulator on one side and, on the reverse side, this same motor allows the flat surface to make a “tapping” motion. At the other end, the toy’s handle is also an insertable dildo with a thrusting mechanism.

Funzze triple stimulator official product picture to show clitoral suction and tapping motions
Image: Funzze

The Funzze 3-in-1 is made of body-safe silicone and available in either purple or green. It is IPX-6 waterproof (suitable for use in the shower and for cleaning under the tap, but not fully submersible) and USB rechargeable. It measures around 7.5″ in total length, 3.5″ in insertable length.

Funzze triple stimulator 3-in-1 vibrator shown in purple and green
Image: Funzze

What I Liked About the Funzze 3-in-1

There’s a common problem with sex toys that try to do too many different things: they do none of them particularly well. Happily, this isn’t the case with the Funzze 3-in-1. Let’s talk about the things I liked about this triple stimulator.

  • The clitoral suction part performs well. It is moderately intense on the lowest setting and very intense on the higher ones. One thing to be aware of is that the nozzle is on the smaller side, so if you have a larger clit that might be something to be aware of. But if you enjoy serious focused clitoral stimulation, this toy will likely work well for you.
  • The tapping function is genuinely excellent. The stimulation it provides offers the depth and intensity of very rumbly vibrations. Even the lowest speed feels surprisingly intense, particularly for a toy at this price-point.
  • The construction of the toy feels sturdy. I can press it firmly against my body and get plenty of pressure without feeling like I’m going to damage it.
  • I kind of like that the suction and tapping functions operate off the same motor. This means you can switch between the two in a second, just by turning it around.
Funzze triple stimulator 3-in-1 vibrator in purple with buttons illuminated in blue

  • The two motors – suction/tapping and thrusting – are controllable separately. They can also be used together, though I can’t think of any reason you’d want to that doesn’t defy the laws of physics!
  • The controls are simple and intuitive, and the buttons are easy to press.
  • The thrusting part has quite a short “length” – only maybe an inch or two of thrust. This won’t work for everyone, of course, but for those who (like me) enjoy penetration but often find deep thrusting more painful than pleasurable, it’s a great choice.
  • With 10 thrusting speeds and 10 sucking/tapping intensity levels, it’s a truly customisable experience with numerous options for different users and different preferences.
  • It comes with a storage bag included.
  • The retail price of $42.99 (that’s around £34) is exceptional value for the quality.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

There’s one main thing I don’t like about the Funzze 3-in-1 triple stimulator: the noise. Whichever way you’re using it, this thing is loud. Both the loud buzz of the head end and the back-and-forth squeak of the thruster are really offputting and grating to me. Which is a shame in a product that I otherwise liked so much.

Funzze triple stimulator 3-in-1 vibrator

My other criticism is the lack of dual-directional controls. Whichever of the toy’s three functions I’m using, it would be nice to be able to scroll through the speeds in either direction.

Funzze 3-in-1 Triple Stimulator: Verdict

Overall, the Funzze 3-in-1 is a much better product than many of the “multiple things in one” options on the market. The clitoral suction stimulator does its job well, and the thrusting function is gentle enough that I can actually use it. It’s that glorious tapping function, though, that really elevates this one for me.

A surprising winner. Good job, Funzze!

The Funzze 3-in-1 triple stimulator retails for $42.99.

Thanks to Funzze for sponsoring this review! This means they paid me to test the toy and write an honest account of my experience. All views, as always, are mine.

Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2024 Day #24: Womanizer Liberty 2

We’ve made it! It’s the final day! I’ve been writing mini reviews of every item in the 2024 adult advent calendar from Lovehoney and Womanizer for the last 24 days. This set retails for £149 at Lovehoney UK and $199 at Lovehoney US and contains £457/$530 worth of products. If this series has inspired you to get one, don’t delay because they usually sell out long before the beginning of December.

Day 24? Let’s finish this thing.

Lovehoney Advent Calendar Day 24 box

Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2024 Day #24: Womanizer Liberty 2

Day 24’s box contains the second of this kit’s two premium products (the first being the We-Vibe Sync Lite from Day 9!) Namely, the Womanizer Liberty 2, a petite clitoral suction stimulator in a neat little travel case.

Product Info

Womanizer Liberty 2 with case

  • Material: Plastic body and case, silicone nozzle
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: Yes, IPX 7 waterproof
  • Size: 4.5″ total length
  • Speeds/patterns: 8 intensity levels
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube
  • Cleaning: Soap and water or a 10% bleach solution, or remove the nozzle and boil-sterilise the nozzle only
  • RRP if bought as a single item: £89.99, available in various colourways

Pros

Womanizer Liberty 2 in case

  • Discreet and travel-friendly case
  • Waterproof for use in the bath or shower
  • Petite size makes it light and comfortable to hold
  • Removeable nozzle is easy to clean
  • Quieter than comparable models at the highest speeds
  • Two-way controls
  • 5 year warranty should anything go wrong

Cons

Womanizer Liberty 2

  • Buttons are not always as responsive as they could be – sometimes I have to press twice to get the speed to change

Verdict

Yes yes yes yes. This is an excellent product and a great note to finish on! Honestly, as long as you like at least a few of the other things at least somewhat, this toy kinda makes the value of the entire kit.

Phew. And we’re done! Will I do this again next year? Probably! Until then, I’ll return you to the regular C&K content you know and love.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the 24 day Lovehoney x Womanizer Sex Toy Advent Calendar to review. All views are mine (with occasional input from Mr C&K!) Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Pleasure Engine Rose Clit Sucker

One rose clit sucker had a viral moment a few years ago thanks, in large part, to TikTok. Some of those reviews were hilarious, and others made incredible claims about how many orgasms they had or how quickly they had them.

As you might know, I’m rather cynical about intense sex toy marketing claims. Even so, I thought it was time I brought you my take on another iteration of the famed rose clit sucker: The Rose by Pleasure Engine.

The Rose by Pleasure Engine

Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker

The Rose by Pleasure Engine is one of many (many) pressure wave stimulators that look like a red rose currently on the market. It has an opening at the top that sits over your clit, creating a seal. Rapid air pulses then provide the stimulation, which some describe as a “sucking” feeling.

The Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker is rechargeable, with a USB magnetic charging station included. I got about an hour of use out of a two-hour charge. It is small, measuring only 2.6″ in total length, and fits in the palm of my hand.

The Rose is made of body-safe silicone and is splashproof but not waterproof.

What I Liked About the Pleasure Engine Rose Clit Sucker

Fundamentally, these products are so popular because they work incredibly well for a lot of people. The Pleasure Engine Rose is no different; it gets me off with the kind of orgasm that leaves my legs shaking. Its pressure waves are perhaps not as smooth as those of some higher-end toys I’ve tried, but they still get the job done reliably every time.

Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker

The nozzle size of rose toys varies, and this one is on the smaller side. It works well for me because my clitoral glans (that’s the external bit) is also fairly small. If you have a larger clit, you might want to look at toys with a wider nozzle. The small size of this one’s nozzle allows it to closely engulf my clit and provide targeted, pinpoint stimulation.

I also think rose toys are popular because they’re aesthetically pleasing. The little silicone petals around the nozzle have no practical purpose, but they do look cute.

The Pleasure Engine Rose is super light, easy to hold, and not too loud.

Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker

Finally, this is more about the marketing than the toy itself, but I also have to give Pleasure Engine and Shevibe props for not claiming that this toy feels like cunnilingus. I’m so sick of the tendency to call suction toys “oral sex simulators.” They’re not. The technology does not exist yet to realistically mimic cunnilingus with a toy. Let’s move on.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

Overall, the Pleasure Engine Rose is a good toy, especially for its price-point. I’m just not sure we needed another of these. I do understand cashing in on viral trends, but almost every sex toy company I can think of that makes clitoral suction toys has now released its own version of the rose. And, a few small details notwithstanding, they’re all kinda sorta very much the same. Even many of the “related products” that show up when I view this one are virtually the same product only made by a different manufacturer.

I also kinda wish it was fully waterproof. This used to be a luxury feature only found on high-end toys, but it’s increasingly becoming standard. The Rose is splash-resistant, but not properly waterproof, so you can’t use it in the bath or submerge it to clean.

I would have preferred a two-button interface rather than a single button, too, as the Rose has 9 settings in total (3 speeds and 6 patterns).

Verdict

If you don’t already have a rose toy and are looking to try one (or have worn yours out and are looking for a replacement) this is as good a choice as any… and, bonus, not sold by Amazon. Please don’t buy sex toys on Amazon, I’m begging you. There is a very significant chance you’ll get a knock-off that may not be body-safe and may not even work.

The Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker is body-safe, gets the job done, and is sold by a reputable company with a great reputation in the world of pleasure products. This toy retails for a very affordable £31/$39 from Shevibe.

Thanks to Shevibe for sending me this product to review. All views are, as always, my own

New Suction Toy Launch: Introducing the Suck-o-Saurus

Despite the date, I promise you that this is a real product that actually exists! Mine is sitting next to me on my desk as I’m typing out this review.

You might remember Velvet Brands from the review of their Velvet Thruster Sex Machine that I published about a year ago. Well, they are back and proud to announce their new toy which is hitting the market today. Meet the Little GOO dinosaur sex toy, also lovingly known as the Suck-o-Saurus.

It looks a little something like this:

Suck-o-saurus dinosaur sex toy clit sucker

What is the Suck-o-Saurus?

The Little GOO, AKA the Suck-o-Saurus, is a clitoral suction toy shaped like a little green dinosaur. It uses a patented reciprocating motion technology to deliver suction-like stimulation to the clitoris. The suction part is located in the base, not in the end of the dinosaur’s face as I assumed it would be!

It is rechargeable via the included magnetic cable, fully IPX7 waterproof and submersible, and made of body-safe silicone. There’s a simple one button interface to turn it on and off and change the setting. It offers six constant speeds (no patterns). The nozzle is also removable for easy cleaning.

The Suck-o-Saurus measures a petite 4″ in height and is small enough to hold comfortably. It’s got more weight to it than I was expecting, and is very firm. Despite the unusual shape, I didn’t have any problems with positioning or comfort while I was using it.

Suck-o-saurus dinosaur clitoral suction toy

The Suck-o-Saurus retails for an incredibly affordable $35. Compared to many suction toys on the market, which can go for $100 or more (occasionally a lot more,) this is frankly a steal. If you’re on a budget or looking for something to try out suction toys without committing to a more expensive purchase, it’s a great place to start. And if something goes wrong it’s under a 1-year no-questions-asked warranty, so you can purchase with confidence.

Okay But… Why?

We’ve had sex toys shaped like rabbits for decades. In recent years we’ve also had penguins, whales, mushrooms, lipsticks, emojis, birds, peaches, and more. So why not dinosaurs as well?

I often think that sex is too serious and should be more fun and playful, and this extends to the toys we use. There’s a time and a place, of course, for beautiful and sensual toys. But there’s also a time and a place for silly and fun toys. Laughter as part of a sexual relationship can help to diffuse tension or awkwardness, break the ice, and help everyone to feel more relaxed.

Suck-o-saurus dinosaur sex toy

On a more serious note, some users – particularly first timers and those newer to the world of sex toys – can find it quite intimidating to choose and use a toy. If choosing something playful – especially if it’s body-safe too – helps those people to feel safer and more comfortable in exploring, I’m all for it.

Over the last few years, thanks to a viral TikTok sensation and some hilariously worded reviews (I’m still laughing at “My legs shot out like one of those little goats that get paralyzed when they’re scared,”) everyone has been obsessed with rose sex toys. That trend, though understandable, has probably just about run its course with virtually every sex toy company I can think of coming out with their own iteration of “the rose.” Will dinosaur sex toys be the next big thing to replace them?

Is the Suck-o-Saurus Any Good?

I’m hoping to work with Velvet on a full review of this product later in the year, so I won’t go into too much depth here, but I know you’re all dying to know whether this whimsical little toy is actually any good.

Well, I’m pleased to tell you that it is! The nozzle is on the smaller side, so this is something to be aware of if you have a larger clitoris or prefer the nozzle to surround more of your clit when you use a suction toy. Its power is good and manages not to be too buzzy, even on the higher settings. The button is easy to press and, since there are only 6 settings, the single button interface doesn’t annoy me as much as they usually do!

When I see cute, quirky or silly sex toy designs, I often worry they are going to be nothing but gimmick. In this case, though, Velvet have released a legitimately good budget clit sucker… that just happens to look like a dinosaur.

Bonus: it also makes a hilarious desk mascot that makes me giggle every time I look at it.

Thanks to Velvet Brands for sponsoring this post. All views and writing are, as always, my own.

[Toy Review] Lovehoney Heartbeat Clitoral Suction Stimulator

Who doesn’t love a sex toy that’s as cute as it is functional? For many of us, the aesthetic of our toys matters and adds to our overall experience. This is particularly true when you’re giving a toy to a lover as a gift. The Heartbeat Clitoral Suction Stimulator from Lovehoney certainly fits the bill of “cute.” But how did it fare in use?

About the Heartbeat Clitoral Suction Stimulator

This is a petite, heart-shaped clitoral suction toy with the nozzle located in the bottom tip of the heart. If you’re not familiar with this type of toy, it surrounds your clit and stimulates it not with vibrations, but with rapid air pulses that create a “sucking” sensation. (Companies keep insisting on claiming that these toys feel like receiving cunnilingus. They do not. Let’s move on from this silliness, shall we?)

Lovehoney Heartbeat clitoral suction stimulator red clit sucker vibrator

Measuring just 3″ in height, the Heartbeat Clitoral Suction Stimulator is light and small enough to fit into the palm of your hand. It is made of soft and body-safe silicone in an attractive, bright crimson red.

The Heartbeat is rechargeable via the included USB cable, with a 60 minute charge giving you around the same in running time. It also has a travel lock function and is IPX7 waterproof – that is, fully submersible for up to 30 minutes.

Lovehoney Heartbeat clitoral suction stimulator red clit sucker vibrator

Settings and Controls

The Heartbeat Clitoral Suction Stimulator offers an impressive ten levels of power. The levels are well-spaced and distinctive. Due to the nature of this type of toy, there are no “patterns” to contend with (fuck patterns amirite?)

Lovehoney Heartbeat clitoral suction stimulator red clit sucker vibrator turned on its side to show the buttons

The toy has a two-button interface located on its side. One button powers it on and off, the other changes the setting. For a toy with as many as 10 settings, you really need two-way controls. Having to scroll all the way back through just to go back one level is a recipe for ruined orgasms and annoyance. Otherwise, the buttons are easy to press and the user interface is simple.

In Use

I understand the appeal of a heart-shaped sex toy, but the shape also creates problems. This is one of the least ergonomic clitoral suction toys I’ve ever tried and it is, frankly, a nightmare to hold for any length of time. Every time I’ve used it, I’ve ended up with serious hand cramp.

My other major complaint with this toy is that the nozzle is too small. I don’t have a particularly large clitoral glans, but this toy is still too small to surround it comfortably. If you have a larger or more prominent clit, forget it. Someone in the Lovehoney on-site reviews does note that they have a smaller-than-average clit and that this toy works really well for them as a result, so it might just be a matter of what types of anatomy it is best suited to.

The Heartbeat Clitoral Suction Stimulator’s power is decent, particularly on the higher levels. On the top setting, it can make me cum in less than 10 minutes (which is good because I can’t really hold it for much longer than that due to the aforementioned shape issues.) The suction sensation is perhaps a little more “buzzy” than many of the higher-end clitoral suckers I’ve tried. It’s also reasonably quiet, which is nice.

Verdict

Cute, for sure, but ultimately more gimmick than function. This toy has too many flaws for me to fully recommend it, most notably the awkward shape and too-small nozzle.

The Heartbeat Clitoral Suction Stimulator retails for £49.99 (UK) or $59.99 (US.) To be honest, it’s pretty overpriced for what it is. I recommend the Rose Clitoral Suction Stimulator or the Romp Switch (review) for budget-friendly alternatives, or the Womanizer Liberty (review) if you can spend a little more.

Don’t forget to use code AFF-COFFKINK10 at checkout for 10% off your entire Lovehoney order.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post and shopping with them sends a small commission my way at no extra cost to you. All views, as always, are mine.

[Toy Review] Womanizer Next

Can you believe it’s 10 years since Womanizer released their first Pleasure Air clitoral stimulator into the world? That product brought a whole new category of sex toys into popular consciousness and launched a thousand copycats. To celebrate 10 years, the company has released their latest offering: the Womanizer Next.

How does it stack up? Let’s take a look, shall we?

Womanizer Next Clitoral Suction Stimulator: What’s New?

The Womanizer Next is the latest in Womanizer’s long line of clitoral suction stimulators based on their patented “Pleasure Air” technology. If you’re not familiar with this type of toy, they feature a nozzle that goes over your clit and then stimulates it with rapid air pulses.

The Womanizer Next comes in sleek and sexy packaging that adds to the overall luxury vibe of the product. In the box you’ll find the toy, the charging cable, a storage bag, a spare nozzle, and an instruction leaflet.

Womanizer Next in its packaging

This toy is rechargeable with a full charge taking around 2 hours and giving you about the same in battery life. It’s also IPX7 waterproof (submersible in up to 1 metre of water).

At first glance, the Womanizer Next and Womanizer Premium bear a strong resemblance. They also retail for a similar price: £179.99/$199 for the Premium and £189.99/$219 for the Next. But what’s special about the Next and how is it similar and different from the Premium?

Womanizer Premium and Womanizer Next
The Womanizer Next (right) with the Womanizer Premium

Womanizer Next vs. Premium: Similarities

  • The two toys are the same basic shape, design, and interface, though the Next is slightly larger than the Premium.
  • Both feature a soft, silicone-coated body and body-safe silicone interchangeable nozzles.
  • Both offer 14 intensity settings.
  • Both come with Smart Silence technology (which means the toy will only operate when it’s in close contact with the body) and an Autopilot mode which guides you through a pre-set sequence of stimulation levels.

Womanizer Next vs. Premium: Differences

This is where things get interesting! The Womanizer Next offers an array of new features alongside those old favourites from the Premium.

  • The latest technology enhancement, 3D Pleasure Air, allows you to control not only the speed/intensity of the suction but also the “depth.” With 14 intensity settings and 3 depth settings – controlled by a separate button – it’s highly customisable.
  • The “Afterglow” function allows you to immediately switch to the lowest setting after orgasm.
  • The new, redesigned motor provides slower pulses than previous Womanizer toys and a “linear, up-and-down movement”. Supposedly this provides a more realistic sensation that more closely mimics oral sex (which… we’ll pick apart later.)

Overall, if you’re choosing between the two products, I’d advise you to go for the Next. You’re only paying £10/$20 more, and you get several great new features for that small price difference.

The Next also comes in two new colourways, Sage and Dark Purple, as well as black.

Womanizer Next: Pros

I had high expectations for the Womanizer Next. I’ve tried many Womanizer products over the years and, despite some occasional missteps, there have been far more hits than misses.

Womanizer Next back view

So what were the best things about this one?

  • That depth function! It’s perfect for ramping things up just at the moment when you need a tiny bit more. Each of the three depth settings feels noticeably different on all the toy’s speeds.
  • The Afterglow feature is genuinely brilliant. Many people, including me, find that their clit gets over-sensitive immediately after orgasm. Being able to switch to the lowest setting and continue enjoying a level of stimulation that’s comfortable is a game-changer.
  • The two nozzles provided are slightly different sizes, making the toy suitable for more bodies. The slightly larger one works best for me.
  • I love the slower air pulses, which give a gentler level of stimulation to start with. Great for warm-up or just for high sensitivity days.
  • I can easily use it hands-free just by kinda holding it between my thighs. This is unusual, but suction toys often work best for me with my legs closed rather than spread. I suspect it’s because so much of the focus is on the head of the clit and this position kinda brings everything closer together.
  • The Smart Silence feature isn’t particularly useful to me – I share a house with a partner who knows all about my masturbation habits! – but may be highly useful to those who need to be more discreet.
  • The button placement is intuitive and the interface is simple to use despite the toy’s many features.
  • It works beautifully in water, creating a kind of “swirling” feeling that is absolutely divine.
  • Most importantly, this thing got me off hard and fast. I’ll say this for Womanizer: they’re reliable when it comes to inducing leg-shaking, sheet-soaking, neighbour-scaring orgasms.

Womanizer Next: Downsides

With all of those great things said, was there anything I didn’t like about the Womanizer Next?

  • I still can’t say I see the point of the Autopilot feature. I guess it’s a little more like receiving stimulation from a partner because the toy changes intensity without input from you? However, unlike a partner, the toy cannot respond to your reactions so the changes are essentially random. And if it shifts down at the wrong moment, that seems like a recipe for ruined orgasms and frustration. (Of course, that might be your kink. In which case have fun.)
  • The buttons are not as clicky or easy to press as on previous Womanizer models.
  • I’m annoyed by the “designed for multiple orgasms” marketing. Not everyone can have multiples! Not everyone WANTS to have multiples! Stop being prescriptive. This is less egregious than “orgasm guaranteed” but it’s still… not great.
  • It is not, despite the packaging and product listing’s claims, “noiseless.” Yes, it’s very quiet on the lower settings. However, on the higher settings (and particularly once the top depth settings get involved) I would say it’s average-to-loud.

No, It Still Doesn’t Feel Like Cunnilingus

I’m calling it: it is not possible, with the technology we currently have available, to design a sex toy that accurately and realistically replicates the feeling of receiving cunnilingus.

Yes, using a clit sucker is much closer to cunnilingus than other forms of stimulation (e.g. masturbation with fingers or vibrators.) It kinda sorta resembles the “sucking” motion that a partner might make on your clit. It’s the closest way for me to scratch that particular itch if I’m craving cunnilingus and do not have a willing partner available. However, it cannot replicate the warmth, wetness, or overall feel of a mouth.

I really wish companies would stop marketing toys in this way, because it just feeds unrealistic expectations. This is a great product, but it is not in any meaningful way an “oral sex simulator.” I am sure such a thing will exist one day, but it doesn’t yet.

Verdict

The Womanizer Next is, like many of its predecessors, seriously pricey. However, it does offer a lot of bang for your buck (so to speak) in terms of features, functionality, and effectiveness. It’s a great next generation of an already excellent product and a worthy celebration of Womanizer’s 10th anniversary!

The Womanizer Next is available from Lovehoney UK* and Lovehoney US*, and of course Womanizer themselves.

[*] Use code AFF-COFFKINK10 to get 10% off

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product, which features in their top sex toys for Valentine’s Day! Affiliate links appear in this post. All views are, as always, mine.

[Toy Review] ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator

ROMP is a toy brand owned by WOW Tech, the parent company behind brands such as Womanizer, We-Vibe, Pjur, and Arcwave. ROMP toys have a fun, playful aesthetic and come in a range of bright, popping colours. I received the ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator (US link) which features in Lovehoney’s top picks for Valentine’s Day, to test.

ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator

The ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator measures 4″ in total length and looks like, well, a tube of lipstick (or other makeup product such as mascara.) It wouldn’t look at all out of place in my makeup bag.

ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator

The ROMP Lipstick is a clitoral suction stimulator that – like the thousands of other toys in this category now on the market – uses a nozzle opening and rapid pulses of air to provide “touchless” stimulation to the clit. The toy’s body is made of hard plastic, and its nozzle is made of body-safe silicone.

This toy is rechargeable. A full charge (2 hours) gives you around 60 minutes of use on the top setting. It’s also IPX7 waterproof, i.e. submersible in water up to 1 metre for up to 30 minutes.

Things I Like About the ROMP Lipstick

Before I start complaining about all the issues with the ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator, let’s talk about the things I did like!

ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator

  • The look. In general, I’m “meh” about the concept of sex toys that are deliberately designed not to look like sex toys. But the aesthetic of this one is cute and fun enough that it gets away with it.
  • It’s small, light, and comfortable to hold.
  • The button placement is sensible (on the base of the toy) and the button itself is clicky and easy to press.
  • It has 7 evenly-graded power settings, which is reasonable for a toy at this price point.
  • It’s pretty quiet, especially when the nozzle is against the body.

That’s about it, I’m afraid.

Anything I Don’t Like?

Ugh. Where do I begin? I really wanted to love this product, because I was drawn to its bright colours and cute design. Unfortunately, I have far more negative than positive to say about the ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator. Namely…

  • The nozzle is too small! I don’t have a particularly large clit, but I couldn’t even get this thing to enclose it all. The nozzle opening is a tiny 1cm in diameter. If your clit is anything but quite small, I think you’ll struggle with this one.
  • The suction mechanism is – how do I put this nicely? – absolute crap. I didn’t get any of the lovely fluttering sensations that I get from good clit suction toys. Instead, it just felt like a particularly weak and buzzy vibrator.
  • The button isn’t always responsive. About 10-20% of the time, I have to press it twice to get the setting to change.
  • For a toy at this price-point, a one-button interface (meaning you have to scroll through all the settings to go backwards) really isn’t good enough.
  • It’s far too expensive. £49.99/$59.99 is a reasonable price for a mid-range toy, but feels like a rip-off for something as disappointing as this.
ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator

Worst of all is that I knew within two minutes that this thing was never going to get me off. Even with warm-up and some hot content to read, there was just absolutely no way. To be honest, even when I was turned on and my clit was sensitive and ready to go, this toy didn’t even feel particularly good. If “did not give me an orgasm” is a damning statement to make about a sex toy, “did not even feel good” is pretty unforgiveable.

A final and possibly petty gripe: the packaging tells me I can “cancel my next booty call”. This is an immediate ugh from me because I do not think we should be comparing toys to human partners or framing them as replacements, even in jest. It’s also just ridiculously inaccurate considering the speed with which I threw this thing across the room and reached for something effective to finish the job.

Verdict

The ROMP Lipstick Clitoral Suction Stimulator is, all things considered, tremendously disappointing. Its nozzle is too small, its suction functionality is lacklustre, and there is simply no universe in which it will ever make me cum.

Sadly, I’m chalking this one up as overpriced and underwhelming. Especially because you can get far better clitoral suction toys for the same price (or even less!) Skip it.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links appear in this post. Using them sends a small commission my way at no extra cost to you!

[Toy Review] Pink Punch Peachu Sucking Vibrator

I am endlessly fascinated and entertained by the different iterations of sex toy designs that companies come out with. As well as the classic rabbit vibes, we’ve got products that look like penguins, whales, emojis, mushrooms, and more. But peaches are a new one on me. I suppose it makes sense – apparently, the peach emoji is the universal symbol for a butt (or, less frequently, a vulva) when sexting, much like the aubergine/eggplant is the symbol for a penis. (And yes, there are aubergine emoji vibrators.) Enter the Pink Punch Peachu Sucking Vibrator.

Pink Punch Peachu Sucking Vibrator: Details

Following the success of their Sunset Mushroom vibrator, Pink Punch have developed their latest offering: an app-capable clit sucking toy known as the Peachu.

Pink Punch Peachu sucking vibrator

My Peachu arrived discreetly packaged and, inside, was attractively boxed in sturdy branded packaging. As well as the toy, the box contains the charging pod and cable, some instructions and additional information, and a set of Pink Punch stickers. As a mid-priced toy, it’s lovely to see the effort that has gone into the presentation here.

The Pink Punch Peachu is a small clitoral toy shaped like a peach. It measures just 4″ from base to tip, and 3″ in diameter at the widest point. It’s made of ultra-soft, matte food-grade silicone, which is completely body-safe as well as a joy to handle. Its colour is a deep orange fading to a pale yellow, with a translucent layer on top to give it a softer aesthetic.

Peachu by Pink Punch
Image: Pink Punch

The Peachu comes with a dome-shaped charging case. Please note that, unlike the last Pink Punch product I tried, this charging case is NOT wireless. You’ll get around 2 hours of use out of a full charge, which takes 2 hours.

The Peachu is waterproof to an IPX7 rating. This means that it is submersible in up to 1 metre of water for up to 30 minutes. So if playing in the bath or shower is your jam, have at it. (Leave the case outside the bathroom, though, as this part isn’t waterproof.)

The Peachu Sucking Vibrator retails for $109 (that’s around £88). I’d consider this a very reasonable price for an app-controlled toy. But did it live up to expectations in use?

What I Like About the Pink Punch Peachu

There are a lot of things – honestly, more than I expected! – that I like about the Pink Punch Peachu.

First, the aesthetic is legitimately cute. I’ve tried so many sex toys at this point that I’m excited by quirky designs, unique shapes, and different twists on old themes. I think something like this could also be a non-threatening introduction to toys for a nervous beginner.

Peachu clit sucker
Image: Pink Punch

The Peachu is pleasingly light at just 164g and surprisingly ergonomic to hold. I have fairly small hands and the Peachu fits comfortably into my hand. The dual layer silicone is also enjoyably squishy to the touch. Its button is easy to press (though I don’t love the placement – more on that in a minute) and I can even forgive a single-button interface on a toy with only five inbuilt settings.

Pink Punch Peachu clit sucker

The charging case is a really big plus for me. It means the toy doesn’t have to sit on the floor (not very hygienic!) or awkwardly perch on the edge of my bed/desk/sofa while I’m charging it. The hard plastic case doubles as a dust cover, keeping the toy clean while it’s in storage.

Noise-wise, the Peachu is fine. Calling it “whisper-quiet” is a stretch, but it’s not going to wake the neighbours or alert your roomates to your masturbatory activities unless your walls are made of paper.

Most importantly, the Peachu gets me off quickly and reliably. The suction sensation is steady and intense, and ramping up slowly through the five speeds can bring me to orgasm in a few minutes. One fellow tester noted that the toy’s stimulation style was somewhat too direct and intense for their preferences. That directness and intensity is what I like in a suction toy, but your mileage may vary. Always be mindful of your own preferences when choosing a toy!

Because the Peachu doesn’t have a typical “nozzle,” just a hole in the body housing the suction element, it’s hard to get a true seal but easy to move around in use. Since I often prefer to move toys around against my vulva rather than simply put them in place and leave them there, this is a feature rather than a bug. With a little lube, it’s easy to slide around and reposition in use as required.

How is the App Functionality?

The first couple times I tried the Peachu, I used it on its own in manual mode. I like to get a sense of how a toy functions in this way before adding all the bells and whistles of app functionality. As we’ve discussed, the Peach is a good clitoral suction toy by itself. But did the Pink Punch app add much to the equation?

The Pink Punch app is available for free on both Android and iOS. Once you’ve downloaded the app, you’ll need to set up an account using your email address and a couple of basic details such as your birth date and gender. You can then connect your toy using Bluetooth, which took me about 20 seconds.

You’ll then see the app’s fun and memorable cyberpunk-y homescreen, from which you can select your options and start exploring. The look and feel is fun, and always calls to mind a retro video game for me.

PinkPunch app

You can try out different settings and control your toy’s intensity with a simple swipe of the finger. There are a number of different patterns and modes to choose from, including the amusingly-yet-bizarrely named Naughty Cat (is this a pussy joke?) I don’t really care for patterns, though, as my regular readers will no doubt be aware. While I had a little fun trying them out, I generally prefer to stick to the constant suction mode.

You can use your phone to control the Peachu from up to 10m away, or connect with a partner remotely anywhere in the world using an invitation code generated through the app. In both cases, the responsiveness is good with little lag or drop-off.

I doubt I’ll be using the Peachu with the app regularly for solo play. I can get everything I want out of it with the built-in patterns and manual interface. But for the occasions when I find myself playing remotely with one of my partners, it’s fun to have the remote control option.

Anything I Don’t Like?

I’m not wild about the button placement. When I’m holding the Peachu in my hand and against my clit, I have to curl my little finger under in a slightly awkward fashion to change the setting in manual mode. The button would be better placed on the back of the toy rather than the base.

I also would have liked the opening to be slightly wider. My clit is, as far as I know, fairly average in size. So this toy might not be a good fit if you have a larger clit or prefer a wider portion of your clitoral area to be covered by the toy’s suction nozzle.

Finally, I don’t love that the app asks for gender (seems unnecessary) and that the only options it offers are “male” and “female.”

Verdict

The Pink Punch Peachu is a surprising gem. When I took it out of the packaging, I wasn’t at all sure its shape or design was going to work for me. But, a few little issues aside, it’s a great little clitoral stimulator with the added bonus of app functionality.

Plus it looks cute as hell on my nightstand.

Coffee & Kink readers can get 30% off on this and other Pink Punch products with code Amy30 at checkout.

This review was sponsored by Pink Punch. This means the company paid me to test the product and write a fair and honest review. All opinions and experiences are, as always, my own.

[Toy Review] Womanizer OG Pleasure Air G-Spot Stimulator

Every now and then, I will encounter a sex toy that leaves me scratching my head in a “I don’t really know what this is” sort of way. Womanizer’s new OG (the Womanizer OG Pleasure Air G-Spot Stimulator, to give it its full title) is one such product.

I find the concept of this toy confusing, and the execution even more so.

Womanizer OG: The Details

This new toy from Womanizer (purveyers of some of my absolute faves in the clitoral suction toys space) looks like a traditional G-spot vibrator at first glance. It measures 9″ in total length, with a generous curve, and 1.4″ in diameter at the widest point.

Womanizer OG G-spot suction vibrator

The Womanizer OG is made of smooth and body-safe silicone, and available in 3 colours: lilac, aubergine, or dark grey. I received the lilac, and it’s genuinely very pretty. It’s also the exact colour my hair goes when the dye has almost but not entirely faded out, which is pleasing.

This toy is waterproof and rechargeable, with a runtime of about 2 hours on a full charge. The Womanizer OG is also equipped with Smart Silence technology, meaning that the suction function will only switch on when it is in contact with the body. This helps to preserve the battery and is also a useful function if discretion matters to you.

A Suction Toy… For Your G-Spot?

I love clitoral suction toys; I own a lot of them, and use them regularly. I also own a G-spot, and like to have it stimulated sometimes. But the combination of these two things has led to a concept that has me confused: a suction toy for the G-spot? Why?

Womanizer OG suction sex toy

I don’t know about you, but I have never had the desire to have my G-spot sucked. (Side note: is it just me or does “I will suck on your G-spot” sound like something a Fetlife rando who doesn’t actually understand how bodies work would drop into the inbox of an unsuspecting sub?)

Despite my reservations, I was curious. Perhaps I would be truly surprised, awed, and blown away by this new innovation in pleasure technology. Reader, I was not. I lubed the toy up and slid it into place, then spent some time slowly cycling through all of the 12 intensity levels. (Another small complaint: the buttons are small and hard to push.)

Womanizer OG review picture of toy's buttons

The result can best be described as “nothing” followed by “why?”. When I eventually managed to get the suction nozzle positioned over my G-spot, I found the sucking sensation little more than mildly annoying on the lower levels, and distinctly uncomfortable on the higher settings. I like a little “ouch” with my sex sometimes, but I usually want that to be inflicted by a cute Top, not by my vibrator!

Is it Better as a Clitoral Toy?

By this point in this endeavour, I had established that I do not enjoy having my G-spot suctioned. (Sentences I did not expect to write today…)

I do, however, like using suction toys on my clit. So naturally I tried to use the Womanizer OG in that way instead. Unfortunately, it wasn’t too effective there, either. Perhaps due to the shape and size of the nozzle, it was almost impossible to get a decent seal around my clit.

Womanizer OG g-spot sucker nozzle

Pro tip: you’ll want to turn Smart Silence off for this (do so by holding down the + and – buttons at the same time for 3 seconds.) When Smart Silence was on, the poor seal meant that the toy kept switching itself off when I was trying to use it!

It’s also loud in a really annoying way – the sound at the higher levels can best be described as “rattly” – and an ergonomic nightmare when used externally. So no, I do not think I’ll be using this one clitorally again.

What About the Vibration Function?

You can use your Womanizer OG with or without the accompanying vibrations. There are 3 constant vibration speeds, controllable through a single button. This button, like the others, is annoyingly fiddly and hard to press.

The vibrations themselves are lacklustre. They are weak and buzzy, as though they were clearly added as an afterthought. This toy is pitched at the “luxury” end of the market, and there’s really no excuse for shitty motors and buzzy vibrations at this price point.

To give credit where credit is due, the Womanizer OG’s curved shape is excellent. Its flexible shaft also makes it easy to position comfortably. But “it makes an okay G-spot dildo” is not the best thing I expect to be able to say about a £180 toy!

Verdict

This one’s a miss from me. The suction sensation on my G-spot was utterly unenjoyable, and it didn’t fare any better as a clitoral suction toy. Without the suction, it’s just a basic G-spot vibrator (that costs £180!). And it’s a kinda meh, buzzy one at that.

As always, take my review as what it is: one person’s experience. This toy has had a lot of great reviews, so your mileage may vary if you decide to try it.

The Womanizer OG is available from some of my favourite adult retailers including Lovehoney UK*, Lovehoney US*, Shevibe, and of course Womanizer themselves!

[*] Use code “AFF-COFFKINK10” to get 10% off

Thanks to Womanizer for sending me this product to review. All opinions are, as always, my own! Affiliate links appear in this post. If you use them to make a purchase, I make a small commission at no extra cost to you.

Why Is Everyone So Obsessed with Rose Toys?

Chances are, if you’re familiar with the sex toy industry or have spent any time in sex positive spaces online in the last couple of years, you’ll have come across rose toys. Perhaps you’ve seen a company advertising them, an influencer gushing about them on social media, or a friend has told you about how much they love theirs. 

But what exactly are rose sex toys, where did they come from, and just why are they so popular? 

It Began on TikTok

I don’t really use or understand TikTok, mostly because I am over 30 and get overwhelmed easily. Therefore, I only became aware of this particular viral sensation when it spread out onto other platforms such as Twitter. I kept seeing people talking about this “rose toy for women”, so obviously I had to check it out and see what all the fuss was about. 

The rose sex toys craze seemingly began sometime in early 2021. In one viral TikTok clip dated 4 May 2021, which has over 631,000 likes at the time of writing, user @_queenk_95 claims to have reached orgasm in 30 seconds with her rose adult toy. Her enthusiastic commenters agree. “WARNING USE AT UR OWN RISK YOULL NEVER BE THE SAME” [sic] one commenter claims.

Image: OOTYEMO

Needless to say, this and similar videos had users rushing to try the toy in their droves. The TikTok rose toy trend is probably one of the biggest pop culture moments in sex toys since an infamous scene from a Sex & the City episode led to many stores selling out of rabbit vibrators in the late 1990s. 

“Rose Toys” Aren’t Just One Thing 

The original “rose toy” that took TikTok by storm seems to have been a rose-shaped clitoral suction stimulator from Amazon. However, even a quick search for “rose sex toy” brings up over 1000 results on Amazon’s US site alone, so I think it’s safe to assume that not everyone who posted about the “rose” was referring to the exact same model. 

I also really don’t recommend buying sex toys from Amazon. In a broadly unregulated industry, the chances of getting a mislabeled knock-off product (which may not even be safe) are too high.

Fortunately, there are now numerous reputable sex toy retailers selling rose sex toys, and they come in many different variations. The majority of rose toys are still based around clitoral suction, but they vary in exact shape and design, size, level of power, settings, controls, and so on. There are also versions with protruding tongues designed to simulate oral sex, versions with G-spot vibrators attached, remote control versions, and more. 

In other words, the world of rose sex toys is now a vast one thanks to their explosion in popularity. So if they appeal to you, you’ve got a good chance of finding one you like.

Sex Toys That Don’t Look Like Sex Toys 

For as long as there’s been a sex toy industry, there has been a market for toys that do not immediately look like what they are. From the classic lipstick and rubber duck vibrators, through to modern toys that look like little penguins and the glass, ceramic, or steel constructions that look like works of art, there’s a sex toy to meet every preference. 

Image: OOTYEMO

There are probably a few reasons behind this. Many people, unfortunately, still feel embarrassed about using toys (sex toy usage has become far less taboo in recent years but many people still aren’t comfortable with having a toy out in the open). Discreet toys are also easier to pop in your bag—or take through airport security—without worrying about someone seeing them. Then, of course, there’s the sheer aesthetic value of some toys. 

The famous rose toys are no different. They don’t immediately scream “VIBRATOR” to the uninitiated, and one of the most endearing things about them is that they’re really, really pretty. As a femme, I really love pretty things and flowers, so an attractive sex toy that looks cute on my nightstand is an instant win. It’s easy to see why their aesthetic alone has helped rose flower toys grow in popularity. 

A Cute Gift 

Opinions on whether you should give sex toys as gifts differ. There are situations where you definitely shouldn’t (workplace Secret Santa, yes I have seen this happen) and situations where it’s maybe okay (a very close friend with whom you have that kind of open and frank relationship.) In the context of an existing sexual relationship where you know the other person’s body and preferences reasonably well, though, I’m all for it! 

A rose toy could be a great gift for the flower-loving femme in your life. It’s an imaginative and sexy twist on a traditional gift, and will bring pleasure that lasts a lot longer. 

The Obvious: They Feel Amazing 

Having tried a number of rose toys at this point, I’ve had somewhat mixed but overwhelmingly positive to very positive experiences with them. As they’re primarily based on clitoral suction, rose toys deliver focused clitoral stimulation via pulses of air, which offers intense pleasure without any of the numbing effect you can get from poor-quality buzzy vibrators. 

Everyone’s experience is different, of course, but many users say that clitoral suction toys such as rose toys help them to orgasm more quickly, more reliably, and more intensely than any other type of stimulation. 

Today’s post was sponsored by the good folks at OOTYEMO, an online sex shop offering numerous different iterations of the rose toy as well as many other products. All writing and views are, as always, my own.