[Review] Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2024

It’s that time of year again when I do a day-by-day unboxing of the Lovehoney Advent Calendar for couples! Lovehoney UK is offering three advent calendars this year: a 12-day version and a 24-day version in partnership with Womanizer, as well as the Amorana Deluxe 24-day calendar which contains over £1100 worth of products. In the US, the 24-day version is the only one currently available.

Lovehoney Adult Advent Calendar 2024

I received the Lovehoney x Womanizer 24-day advent calendar. Straight away, I will say that I like the presentation of this Lovehoney advent calendar much more than previous iterations. The products are packaged in little individually labelled cardboard boxes in festive red and gold, rather than the tear-off doors that start to look a little scruffy when you’re a few days in. There’s also no plastic inner tray, cutting down on single-use plastic to make the whole thing more eco-friendly.

Lovehoney Adult Advent Calendar 2024

For the next 24 days, I’ll open one door each day and tell you a little about the item inside in a mini review with product info, pros and cons.

Without further ado, let’s dive into Day 1, shall we?

Day #1: Rechargeable Bullet Vibrator

Like previous iterations of the Lovehoney Advent Calendar, this one begins with a rechargeable bullet vibrator. This time, it’s a pretty rose gold colour with black button and Lovehoney insignia.

Lovehoney Adult Advent Calendar 2024 rechargeable bullet vibrator

Product Info

  • Material: ABS plastic with silicone button
  • Colour: Rose gold
  • Body safe? Yes, ABS plastic is non-toxic and non-porous
  • Waterproof: Yes, IPX-7 waterproof (submersible)
  • Size: 3″ length
  • Speeds/patterns: 3 speeds and 7 patterns
  • Lube-compatible: Any kind of lube is suitable
  • Cleaning: Sterile wipe or warm water and antibacterial soap
  • RRP if bought as a single item: £24.99

Pros

  • Light and compact – ideal for sliding between bodies during partnered sex or throwing into your bag for a sexy date
  • Surprisingly decent level of power for its size and price-point, and the hard plastic transmits the vibrations well
  • Versatile – designed for clits but great for penises, balls, nipples, and all kinds of other erogenous zones too (don’t use it anally, though, as it doesn’t have a suitable base)

Cons

  • Unlike many Lovehoney toys, it does not arrive with any charge so you’ll need to plug it in before you use it. This can ruin the mood if you’re aiming for an “unbox and use straight away” vibe.
  • A little more buzzy than I would prefer
  • Single button interface is kind of annoying when there are so many settings

Verdict

Lovehoney Adult Advent Calendar 2024 bullet vibrator

Once again, a solid basic bullet vibrator to kick things off. I would prefer it to be a bit more rumbly, but for the size and price-point it’s decent.

Day #2: Lube and Toy Wipes

Lovehoney Advent Calendar Day 2 box

Door #2 contains two items: a 60ml tube of Womanizer water-based lubricant and a packet of 10 Lovehoney toy cleaning wipes.

Pros

Lovehoney toy wipes and Womanizer water-based lube

  • The biodegradable wipes are eco-friendly
  • The handy travel sizes are ideal for taking with you on a date or weekend away
  • Both products are compatible with all toy materials including silicone
  • The lube has a nice, fairly thin and runny consistency that flows and spreads well
  • The lube is virtually scent-free and flavourless

Cons

  • The lube contains glycerin as the second ingredient. Experts believe that glycerin can damage the vagina’s mucus membranes and raise the osmolality of a lube, increasing the risk of irritation or even infection. Claims that glycerin contributes to yeast infections are somewhat controversial and hotly debated. However, experts at Stanford OB/GYN and the Cleveland Clinic believe there is a risk. Personally, I avoid glycerin-containing lubes for the sake of my vaginal health. They also tend to have an unpleasant sticky or tacky feeling after a while.
  • The toy wipes will clean your toy and should not be taken as a substitute for properly sterilizing it, especially if you are sharing it with a partner or partners.

Verdict

I like this combination of two miniature products together, but I would like to see the lube swapped out with one that doesn’t contain glycerin.

Day #3: Silicone Textured Dildo

Lovehoney Advent Calendar Day 3 box

Today’s box revealed a bright red silicone dildo with a curved shaft, gentle rippling texture on the underside, and slightly pronounced head. It also has a suction cup base and a hollow space where you can insert the bullet vibrator from Day 1.

Product Info

Lovehoney silicone textured dildo

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Scarlet red
  • Body safe? Yes, silicone is body-safe and non-porous
  • Waterproof: Yes, there is no motor and the material is non-porous so you can safely use this toy in water
  • Size: 6″ length, 1.2″ diameter at widest point
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
  • Cleaning: Sterile wipe, warm water and antibacterial soap, or boiling
  • RRP if bought as a single item: A similar product retails for £24.99

Pros

  • Soft and flexible
  • Petite size makes it unthreatening for a beginner
  • Lovely curve, ideal for targeted G-spot or prostate stimulation
  • Large base makes the toy anal safe
  • Works with or without the bullet vibe from Day 1 (or any suitably sized bullet in your collection)
  • Texturing adds additional internal stimulation

Cons

  • Bullet vibe has a tendency to get stuck and be hard to remove (pro tip: lube it first!)
  • Base is too small for the toy to be harness-compatible

Verdict

Lovehoney silicone textured dildo

A great basic textured dildo! These kits are really aimed at people who are newer to toys/sexual exploration, and this item’s thoughtful design and small-ish size make it ideal for a first dildo. I would like to see a slightly larger base to make it harness-compatible, though.

Day #4: TPE Penis Stroker

Day 4’s box contains a TPE penis stroker, complete with a slot along the side to add the bullet vibrator from Day 1 (or any other bullet in your collection) if you want to.

Lovehoney Advent Calendar Day 4 box

Product Info

Lovehoney penis stroker around red silicone dildo

  • Material: Thermoplastic elastomer (TPE), a kind of soft plastic
  • Colour: Translucent white
  • Body safe? Ish. TPE is generally non-toxic but it is porous, which means it will harbour bacteria and cannot be fully sterilised. Don’t share it and don’t expect it to last forever. I recommend upgrading to a silicone stroker when you can.
  • Waterproof: Yes, you can use this toy in water safely, though it may damage the material more quickly.
  • Size: 4″ length but stretchy
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
  • Cleaning: Warm water and antibacterial soap. Dusting the toy with a little cornstarch after cleaning and drying may help to extend its life.
  • RRP if bought as a single item: This exact product is not available, but a similar item retails for £34.99

Pros

Lovehoney penis stroker around red silicone dildo viewed from above to show slot for bullet vibrator

  • A decent introduction to strokers if you’ve never used one before
  • Ability to use with the bullet vibrator from Day 1, transforming it into a vibrating stroker
  • Very stretchy to accommodate most penis sizes
  • Nice internal texturing that hugs and stimulates the entire shaft of your penis

Cons

  • Weird powdery texture that feels horrible on my hands
  • Material cannot be fully sterilised
  • Unlikely to last long

Verdict

It’s fine for what it is, but I would much prefer it were made of a non-porous material like silicone. Again: if you like the sensation, upgrade to a silicone stroker for a toy that will last you a lifetime and be far more hygienic.

Day #5: Kink Blindfold

Sensory deprivation can be a lot of fun to play with. By taking away one or more of the senses (such as sight) you heighten the others (such as touch). It can also be a great way to enhance anticipation, play with power and control, or otherwise explore whatever aspects of kink and BDSM appeal to you.

Today’s advent calendar box contains a kink blindfold. Made of polyester and with a pretty black and rose gold pattern, this blindfold measures 7″ across and 2.5″ top to bottom. A similar item retails for £7.99 if bought separately.

Pros

Lovehoney black and rose gold satin kink blindfold

  • Stretchy elastic means the blindfold will fit most users
  • Plushy padded backing is comfortable to wear
  • Pretty black and rose gold design
  • Doubles as a sleep mask (I have several of these now and as a seasoned kinkster I rarely use them for BDSM as I have better blindfolds, but I always take one with me when I travel to help me sleep)

Cons

  • Not quite big enough – it blocks most of the light effectively but I can still see around the edges a bit if I keep my eyes open
  • Cheap fabric is starting to pull at the edges and look less attractive after just a few wears
  • I’m not sure how well it would survive washing

Verdict

A perfectly serviceable basic blindfold if you just want to play but aren’t looking for complete sight deprivation. It would be better if it was slightly wider. If you enjoy playing with this, then it’s easy to upgrade to a better kink blindfold that will last you longer and block more of your vision.

Day #6: Crystal Butt Plug

Box #6 contains an aluminium metal butt plug with a sparkly red crystal-look base.

Product Info

Lovehoney advent calendar crystal butt plug

  • Material: Aluminium
  • Colour: Rose gold body with a red gem base
  • Body safe? Generally yes; aluminium is a non-toxic and non-porous metal that is safe for use in sex toys. However, some aluminium can contain traces of nickel so I’d be very cautious if you are allergic.
  • Waterproof: Yes, you can use this toy in water with no issues.
  • Size: 3″ in total length, 1.1″ in diameter at widest insertable point
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube compatible: Yes, any kind of lube is suitable
  • Cleaning: Sterile wipe, 10% bleach solution, or warm water and antibacterial soap. I wouldn’t boil this one or put it in the dishwasher as it might damage the glue holding the gem in place.
  • RRP if bought as a single item: This similar toy retails for £22.99

Pros

Lovehoney advent calendar crystal butt plug

  • Surprisingly light – aluminium is a lot lighter than stainless steel, making it a more accessible entry point for metal toys
  • The rose gold body and red crystal colour scheme is really pretty
  • Great for temperature play – just pop it in the fridge or run it under some warm (not hot) water right before use
  • Small size likely to make it suitable for more users

Cons

  • In general, I think a metal anal toy in a set aimed at beginners is a bold choice. I might have gone for silicone instead.
  • The firm rounded base might dig in after you’ve been wearing it for a while and could be uncomfortable

Verdict

A nice little metal plug; personally I would have gone for silicone if I were designing this kit, but as entry-level metal anal toys go this is a decent one. The pretty colour and sparkly crystal make it super cute, too.

Day #7: Vanilla Massage Oil

Day 7’s box contains a 30ml bottle of Lovehoney’s vanilla massage oil. Massage can be a great precursor to sex, a way to connect intimately and show love and affection to a partner without getting your genitals involved, or a form of aftercare. For those in kinky dynamics, it can also be a fun form of service!

Product Info

Lovehoney vanilla massage oil

This vanilla massage oil contains just four ingredients:

  • Ethylhexyl palmite: A common and safe emollient and carrying agent which can soften and smooth the skin.
  • Caprylic/capric triglyceride: Derived from coconut oil and glycerine, this antioxidant also smooths the skin and helps to bind other ingredients. It is safe for topical use unless you have a coconut oil allergy.
  • Isopropyl myristate: An emollient with low viscosity which softens, smooths, and moisturises the skin and is safe and beneficial for most users. It may cause skin irritation in a small minority of people, usually those with existing skin conditions.
  • Parfum (aroma): This is a weird one. “Parfum” isn’t actually an ingredient but a concoction that could contain any of over 3000 ingredients designed to make a product smell good. Some people recommend avoiding products with this mystery mix, others say it’s probably fine as long as you don’t have an allergy or sensitivity. Personally I don’t worry about it too much for products for occasional topical use (such as massage oils), but your risk tolerance may vary.

This oil is also sold separately under Lovehoney’s Fifty Shades of Grey branded products and retails for £11.99 for 30ml.

Pros

  • Nice vanilla smell, distinctive but not overpowering or too “chemically”
  • Glides on smoothly and has a pleasant skin feel

Cons

  • Dries out quickly and doesn’t last particularly well, meaning you might need to reapply it regularly
  • May be unsuitable for those with fragrance sensitivities or certain skin allergies
  • Leaves a slight oily feeling on my hands after use

Verdict

Not my favourite massage oil, but it’s fine. I wouldn’t likely buy this again as there are other massage products I like a lot more.

Day #8: Wrist Restraints

Lovehoney Advent Calendar Day 8 box

Today’s box contains a pair of velcro-shut wrist cuffs with plastic hardware. The cuffs are black, and the hardware is rose gold, matching various other items in this set. I’ll say this for Lovehoney and Womanizer, they have their aesthetic cohesion down.

Pros

I will say straight away that these are a huge step up from the 2021 calendar’s “wrist restraints” (glorified ribbons and frankly pretty dangerous) and from 2022’s uncomfortable rough cuffs. These ones are made of a soft material that feels nice against the skin.

Lovehoney advent calendar wrist cuffs

Other pros include:

  • Velcro fastenings come undone in seconds, enhancing safety and making them beginner-friendly
  • Very adjustable so will fit just about anyone
  • Attached clips allow you to cuff someone’s hands together or clip them to something else

Cons

  • Clips are tiny, so what you can fasten them to is pretty limited
  • Not particularly strong – the hardware feels like it would break if you pulled against them too hard
  • When you fasten them tighter, there’s nowhere for the spare velcro to be tucked so it just sort of… dangles

Verdict

Lovehoney wrist restraints from adult advent calendar 2024

You might be sending a theme in my overall impression of this kit: these cuffs aren’t amazing, but they’re fine. If you want to play with light bedroom bondage or try out getting restrained for the first time, they’re ideal. If you’re looking for something a bit more heavy-duty, though, you’ll probably want to upgrade to leather cuffs (or vegan equivalent) or go to a dedicated kink gear maker.

Day #9: We-Vibe Sync Lite

Lovehoney Advent Calendar Day 9 box

The We-Vibe Sync Light is a wearable vibrator designed to be inserted into the vagina during penetrative sex, with an external arm that provides clitoral stimulation. Of course, as always, there are lots of different ways to use toys and the suggested way is just one of them!

We-Vibe Sync Lite

Product Info

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: No – toy is IPX-4 splashproof but should not be submerged
  • Size: 3″ insertable length
  • Speeds/patterns: 4 speeds and 6 patterns
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe is best for non-submersible toys
  • RRP if bought as a single item: £79.99
We-Vibe Sync Lite

Pros

  • Middling power vibrations – they’re not knock-your-socks-off, but they’re decent
  • Flexible middle between the two arms allows you to position the toy in whatever way is most comfortable for your body
  • App controls! I did not expect to find an app-controlled toy in this kit but I am very pleasantly surprised. We-Vibe’s app is free from the Android or iOS stores and allows you to connect at close range or remotely from anywhere in the world.
We-Vibe Sync Lite

Cons

  • No remote control, which is a downside if you don’t want to use the app
  • Single button interface on the body of the toy is kind of annoying
  • Not waterproof
  • In my experience, these toys don’t generally stay in place well during partnered sex without someone holding them in position

Verdict

This is a really impressive addition to the kit! These types of toys are normally seriously pricey, so this is a great introduction for those who are curious about trying one. The app controls are also a really nice extra, particularly for couples who want to connect sexually over long distance.

Day #10: Silicone Cock Ring

Today’s item is a basic silicone thick cock ring. Cock rings are worn around the base of the penis, restricting blood flow outwards to help the wearer maintain a stronger erection for longer. Some also say they heighten sensation and intensify orgasm.

Lovehoney advent calendar thick cock ring

According to Healthline, cock rings are safe for the vast majority of wearers as long as you listen to your body, wear a ring of a suitable size, and follow some basic precautions, such as using lube and not leaving the ring on for more than 30 minutes at a time.

Product Info

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes – silicone is non-porous and non-toxic.
  • Waterproof: Yes, this toy is non-porous and has no motor so can safely be used in water
  • Size: 1.5″ diameter but stretchy
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
  • Cleaning: Boiling, a 10% bleach solution, a sterile wipe, or warm water and antibacterial soap
  • RRP if bought as a single item: £9.99 for a pack of 3

Pros

Lovehoney advent calendar thick cock ring

  • Very stretchy to accommodate most penis sizes
  • Extra-thick cock ring enhances comfort

Cons

  • May be uncomfortably tight on those with very girthy penises

Verdict

Not much more to say on this one – a great basic cock ring that is also body-safe and should be durable and long-lasting.

Day #11: Spanking Paddle

Today’s item is a mini spanking paddle with a pretty black and rose gold design matching other items in the kit. It’s made of silky satin on one side and faux leather on the other, and has a ribbon wrist loop. It measures 9″ in total length.

Lovehoney spanking paddle

A similar item retails by itself for £16.99.

Pros

Lovehoney spanking paddle

  • Very safe as an intro toy for impact play beginners – you’re very unlikely to do anyone real damage with this
  • Slightly different sensation from each of the two sides (the leather side is a little more stingy)
  • Impressive slappy noise which is hot to some people

Cons

  • Unlikely to satisfy anyone who enjoys more than very mild pain
  • Loud noise may be problematic if you have to keep your play discreet
  • Not particularly robust, will probably fall apart after a bit

Verdict

This is a perfectly okay spanking paddle for total beginners. It’s gentle enough to be safe and non-threatening, and might be a decent way to figure out if impact play is something you enjoy. It’s unlikely to satisfy serious BDSM enthusiasts but honestly, serious BDSM enthusiasts aren’t the target market for this kit anyway.

Try it out and, if you like it, upgrade to a well-made BDSM paddle.

Day #12: Snap Sex Position Card Game

Today it’s literally the card game “Snap” but as a sex position card game. Is the idea that you play the game and then when you get a “snap”, you have to have sex in that position? Because YKINMKBYKIOK and all, but that doesn’t sound sexy to me.

Also, they should really rename this as “Sex Position Card Game For Very Athletic Straight People.” Because seriously, look at them. They all assume, to a greater or lesser extent, a cisgender man and woman having penetrative vaginal sex. Some of them are fine, if fairly generic. Some are potentially doable, if you’re very fit, like “The Wheelbarrow”:

Snap Sex Position Card Game sample cards from Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2024

Others are… well, this:

Snap Sex Position Card Game "Hold On Tight" sex position

Stop it, Lovehoney. You’re being silly now.

Pros

  • Potentially a fun, goofy and low-pressure way into exploring new positions, I guess?
  • Calls to mind this scene from The Bold Type in which our three bestie protagonists test out a new sex position for Scarlet Magazine.
  • Some of these, at least, could potentially work for strap-on sex or anal sex (at least if you made some minor adjustments) as well as vaginal sex.

Cons

  • A lot of these are just fairly standard positions that most people who have penetrative sex likely already have in their repertoire.
  • The others are, as we have identified above, anything from “improbable if you’re not an athlete” to “physically im-fucking-possible.”
  • Extremely cishetero and gendered

Verdict

You might get a little inspiration from this, or at the very least you’ll have a laugh trying out some of the more challenging positions. Overall, though, I don’t know why we’re still pretending that contorting yourself into all kinds of weird shapes is superior to or hotter than good old missionary, doggy style, or over-the-edge-of-the-bed fucking.

Day #13: G-Spot/P-Spot Massager

Today’s product is a G-Spot/P-Spot Massager. In other words, a penetrative toy that can be used to stimulate either the G-spot or the prostate. It has an optional slot to insert a bullet vibrator such as the one from Day 1.

Product Info

Lovehoney black silicone P-spot massager

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: Yes (though if you’re using a vibrator with it, make sure that’s waterproof too!)
  • Size: 4″ insertable length, 1.4″ diameter at widest point
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, boiling, or gentle antibacterial soap and water
  • RRP if bought as a single item: N/A – not available

Pros

Lovehoney black silicone P-spot massager

  • Suitable and safe for both vaginal and anal use
  • Can be used with or without a vibrator
  • Very flexible, which can help with insertion and comfortable positioning
  • Bulbed head for precision stimulation of the G-spot or prostate
  • Narrow neck allows it to sit comfortably once inserted
  • Beginner-friendly size

Cons

  • None that I can see!

Verdict

This is a lovely item and a great inclusion in the kit. It’s good to see items that are suitable for people regardless of their body or genital type, the shape and curve are excellent, and the size isn’t too intimidating for those who are new to anal play.

Day #14: Menthol Pleasure Balm

Today’s item is a 7g tin of Lovehoney’s menthol pleasure balm. This item isn’t sold separately in this form but it’s pretty similar to the Bliss Orgasm Balm, which I love and use regularly.

Product Info

Lovehoney menthol pleasure balm

In a nutshell, pleasure balm or orgasm balm is designed to be applied to the external genitals, especially the clitoris. The ingredients provide a tingling sensation and may encourage blood flow, promoting greater sensitivity.

The Menthol Pleasure Balm contains a pretty long list of ingredients, but most of them give me no cause for concern. It does contain propylparaben, and some people like to avoid parabens entirely for understandable reasons. However, according to a report by the Scientific Committee on Consumer Safety, “the SCCS has concluded that propylparaben is safe when used as a preservative in cosmetic products up to a maximum concentration of 0.14%.” I’m not a scientist, of course, but I would conclude from this data that the tiny amount in this product is unlikely to do you any harm.

Lovehoney menthol pleasure balm ingredients list

Unfortunately this balm contains beeswax, so it is not vegan.

Pros

  • 7g doesn’t sound like a very big tin, but you really don’t need a lot to get the effects so you’ll get a good few uses out of this
  • Genuinely works! I have had several tins of this stuff over the years and I love it. It really does enhance sensitivity (it’s not a magic orgasm spell, though, so keep your expectations realistic!)
  • Some of the plant-based oils and other ingredients may have beneficial properties for skin

Cons

  • Not vegan due to beeswax
  • Oily consistency can make clean-up a bit annoying
  • Strong minty scent may be unpleasant to some people

Verdict

I still really like this stuff, though I think personally I’ll be sticking to the vegan, paraben-free version.

Day #15: Plastic Massager

Today’s item is a handheld plastic massager. It’s red and sparkly, and has a central handle and then four arms each with a spherical bulb on the end to get deep into all those muscles and knots. On its own, this item retails for £5.99.

Lovehoney red sparkly plastic massager

Pros

  • Light weight and ergonomic design make it comfortable to hold and use
  • Great way to give a deeper massage, especially if your hands or wrists get tired or sore
  • Flexible options – use one, two, or all four ends at once for different sensations
  • Really good for getting properly into sore muscles!
  • Basically zero maintenance – just wash off excess massage oil after use and you’re good to go

Cons

  • Because it’s hard plastic, you need to be a little bit careful – you could possibly hurt someone if you press too hard. We’re not talking “serious injury” here, but maybe “nasty bruise.”

Verdict

Lovehoney red sparkly plastic massager

I really like this one. And it’s sparkly, which never hurts my opinion of a product!

Day #16: Micro Wand Vibrator

Today’s product is a micro wand vibrator. Look how tiny it is!

Lovehoney micro wand vibrator

Product Info

  • Material: Plastic body. I thought the head material was probably silicone but wasn’t 100% sure, so I flame-tested it and based on what I know about deciphering flame test results I think I’m correct
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes, assuming it is indeed silicone
  • Waterproof: No
  • Size: 4.5″ in total length
  • Speeds/patterns: 3 speeds, 7 patterns
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
  • Cleaning: Wipe the head with a body-safe sterile wipe (do not submerge this toy in water)
  • RRP if bought as a single item: £19.99 for something similar

Pros

Lovehoney micro wand vibrator

  • Small and discreet
  • Flexible neck for easy positioning
  • Easy user interface and satisfyingly clicky buttons

Cons

Lovehoney micro wand vibrator

  • Requires batteries, which are not included (2 x AAA)
  • Not waterproof
  • Vibrations not particularly powerful
  • Buzzy as fuck

Verdict

I think people see “wand vibrator” and assume that it’s going to be powerful. But this isn’t a wand in any meaningful sense. This is a wand. This tiny little thing, though, is just a crappy vibrator with a weak and buzzy motor designed to look like a micro version of a wand.

I already have something very similar from a previous calendar, and it’s often within reach because it does wonders for my sore neck when I’ve been sitting at the computer for too long. Partners have also really enjoyed having it used on them.

Day #17: Dice Sex Game

Today’s box contains a simple dice sex game. One dice includes pictures of items from the calendar (stroker, bullet vibe, paddle, mini wand, dildo, and massager). The other contains timeframes ranging from 1 minute to 15 minutes, plus a “free” option.

Lovehoney dice sex game

Pros

  • Can be a fun, low-pressure way into exploring with a partner if you are new and nervous about using toys or experimenting sexually
  • You can use the dice in different ways. I’m immediately thinking of a game where you roll the “implement” die three times and then have to come up with a quick scene that incorporates all three elements.

Cons

  • Things can end up feeling unbalanced if you follow the game too rigidly. If one person gets 15 minutes of something then the other rolls one minute, it’s probably not going to feel very mutual. Of course, you can get around this by creating “house rules” or just ensuring everyone gets roughly equal time (or whatever they want/need) even if you’re switching between different activities.

Verdict

Lovehoney dice sex game

Not really my thing, but perfectly fine for its intended audience.

Day #18: Ankle Restraints

Remember those velcro-fastening wrist cuffs from Day 8? Well, today’s box containd the matching set of ankle restraints. These, too, are black with rose gold hardware and come with a clip to fasten them together.

Pros

Lovehoney ankle restraints

  • Like the wrist cuffs, they’re a huge step up from the rough nylon cuffs and those unsafe ribbon things from previous years
  • Soft and comfy to wear
  • Safe and beginner-friendly as you can unfasten them in a second
  • Very adjustable sizing

Cons

  • The clips are tiny and not very strong
  • Annoying dangling velcro strap when they’re on
  • Mostly, I’m just annoyed that these were a separate item. All four cuffs should have been in the same box as they’re clearly a set.

Verdict

Exactly like the other half of this matching set (sensing a pattern here?) these are far from amazing, but they’re fine. They do the job if all you want to do is experiment with light bondage. If you find you enjoy it, you can always splash out on some properly made kink ankle cuffs later on.

Day #19: Kegel Balls

Day 19’s box contains a set of kegel balls, AKA ben-wa balls. Kegel balls are interesting, because there are a lot of lofty claims out there about them. They’ll solve incontinence! They’ll make your orgasms better! They might even make it easier to orgasm if you struggle!

Is any of this true?

Eh. Maybe. Check out my past posts on kegel balls and kegel exercisers, especially this one, to learn more about what the current research does and does not say.

In this post I will be approaching kegel balls solely as a sex toy designed for pleasure, not as any sort of health or wellness device.

Product Info

Lovehoney kegel balls

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Red balls with black casing
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 3″ insertable length, 3.5″ tail, 1.1″ diameter across each ball
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube is best
  • Cleaning: Boiling is best as this will kill all bacteria even in hard-to-reach places
  • RRP if bought as a single item: This similar set retails for £12.99

Pros

  • Small enough for beginners
  • Long and strong silicone cord for easy removal
  • Removeable sling makes cleaning easy

Cons

  • None that I can find – these are great.

Verdict

An ideal introduction to kegel balls for anyone who has never tried them before.

Day #20: Rabbit Cock Ring

Day 20’s box contains a silicone cock ring with rabbit ears. This can be used with the bullet vibrator from Day 1, or on its own. When combined with the bullet vibrator, the ears can provide clitoral stimulation to the receptive partner during penetrative sex as well as stimulating the wearer. On its own, it still gives you all the benefits of using a cock ring.

Product Info

Black silicone rabbit cock ring

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 1.5″ ring diameter, 1″ ears
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube
  • Cleaning: Boiling, soap and water, or a 10% bleach solution
  • RRP if bought as a single item: Not available but this similar item retails for £24.99

Pros

Black silicone rabbit cock ring

  • Versatile toy suitable for use during masturbation or partnered sex, and with or without a vibrator
  • Adds clitoral stimulation, which a large majority of vulva-owners need to orgasm and which is not always forthcoming during p-in-v sex
  • Wide band for comfortable fit
  • Stretchy to accommodate different sizes

Cons

  • May not fit people with very girthy penises comfortably

Verdict

Realistically, this toy is not something I’m likely to use. My experience has been that vibrating cock rings during penetrative sex don’t tend to do much for me as the stimulation they provide isn’t consistent enough. But everyone’s different and it’s a perfectly fine item, just not really for me.

Day #21: Beginner Nipple Clamps

Day 21’s box contains a pair of nipple clamps. They’re made of rose gold plastic, with a little decorative lightning bolt charm and red silicone tips. The slider design allows you to loosen or tighten them as desired.

Lovehoney beginner nipple clamps

They’re a variation on Lovehoney’s Tease Me clamps, which retail for £12.99.

Pros

  • They’re cute; I like the colour and the lightning charm is a fun touch
  • Easy to put on and take off quickly
  • Adjustable to fit different nipple sizes and tightness preferences
  • Very gentle, which makes them suitable beginner nipple clamps

Cons

  • That beginner-friendly gentleness means they’re unlikely to be enough for wearers who prefer any significant pressure or intensity
  • Won’t fit people with larger nipples
  • The slider starts to rub off the coloured plating after a few uses
  • They don’t stay on particularly well and fall off at the slightest tug

Verdict

These are fine if you’re just after a pair of purely decorative nipple clamps or want to try something very gentle for your first time. However, they’re neither particularly functional nor particularly durable for anything more than that. If you like them or want to experiment more with nipple clamps, get a more robust pair of adjustable clamps or try clover clamps.

Day #22: Finger Vibe Sleeve

Box 22 contains a finger vibe sleeve. There’s a space to insert a bullet vibrator (such as the bullet vibe from Day 1, or any other bullet in your collection that fits) and a loop for your finger.

Product Info

Lovehoney finger vibe sleeve

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Red
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: Yes (but the bullet vibrator you use with it may or may not be, so check first!)
  • Size: 2.5″ long sleeve for bullet, 0.5″ diameter finger loop
  • Speeds/patterns: N/A
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube
  • Cleaning: Boiling, soap and water, or a 10% bleach solution
  • RRP if bought as a single item: £29.99 with a bullet vibe included

Pros

Lovehoney finger vibe sleeve

  • Pairs with the bullet vibrator from Day 1, allowing yet another way to use it
  • Offers a fun new way to explore fingering and hand sex, which I believe are wildly underrated sex acts and should be explored far more
  • Gentle texturing on the underside offers additional clitoral stimulation
  • Can reduce the physical effort of the giving partner during hand sex, which is useful if you suffer from pain or fatigue in your hands

Cons

  • The finger loop is tiny! It was snug on me, and I have small hands. Someone with larger hands doesn’t stand a chance using this
  • If your bullet vibrator isn’t super powerful, the silicone dampens the vibrations
  • Texturing could do with being a bit more pronounced

Verdict

This is a really nice addition to the kit at least in theory. However, it feels to me like the design was a bit rushed and basic things – is the finger loop large/stretchy enough to be comfortable, is the texturing pronounced enough to be felt by most users? – were missed.

Day #23: Under-Mattress Restraints

Today’s item is a set of under-mattress restraints with clips to attach cuffs at each corner. These four-way restraints are designed to fit under your mattress, which then anchors them in place. Use in conjunction with the wrist cuffs from Day 8 and the ankle cuffs from Day 18 for a full set of restraints.

This set is similar to the Bondage Boutique Bound to Please Under-Mattress Restraints, which retail for £49.99 for a set including cuffs.

Pros

Under-mattress restraints set from Lovehoney

  • Adjustable to use with all bed sizes, including my fabulous super-king
  • Great way to try bedroom bondage if you want to tie someone to the bed but don’t have a metal bed frame or other suitable hard points.
  • Easy to tuck them out of sight quickly if you need to without dismantling the whole set-up
  • Strong and sturdy material
  • Safe and easy introduction to bondage
  • Pairs with the cuffs in this set or, if you prefer, you can upgrade to better cuffs and continue using the restraint kit

Cons

  • I feel like the under-mattress restraints and pairs of cuffs should have been ONE item in the advent calendar, not three. Otherwise, no complaints.

Verdict

Overall, this is a great addition for the second-last day of the advent kit. I’m also pleasantly surprised to learn they will work with my giant bad, having assumed they wouldn’t. For people who are brand new to playing with bondage and restraint, they’re a safe and accessible place to start.

Day #24: Womanizer Liberty 2

Day 24’s box contains the second of this kit’s two premium products (the first being the We-Vibe Sync Lite from Day 9!) Namely, the Womanizer Liberty 2, a petite clitoral suction stimulator in a neat little travel case.

Product Info

Womanizer Liberty 2 with case

  • Material: Plastic body and case, silicone nozzle
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: Yes, IPX 7 waterproof
  • Size: 4.5″ total length
  • Speeds/patterns: 8 intensity levels
  • Lube-compatible: Water-based lube
  • Cleaning: Soap and water or a 10% bleach solution, or remove the nozzle and boil-sterilise the nozzle only
  • RRP if bought as a single item: £89.99, available in various colourways

Pros

Womanizer Liberty 2 in case

  • Discreet and travel-friendly case
  • Waterproof for use in the bath or shower
  • Petite size makes it light and comfortable to hold
  • Removeable nozzle is easy to clean
  • Quieter than comparable models at the highest speeds
  • Two-way controls
  • 5 year warranty should anything go wrong

Cons

Womanizer Liberty 2

  • Buttons are not always as responsive as they could be – sometimes I have to press twice to get the speed to change

Verdict

Yes yes yes yes. This is an excellent product and a great note to finish on! Honestly, as long as you like at least a few of the other things at least somewhat, this toy kinda makes the value of the entire kit.

Phew. And we’re done! Will I do this again next year? Probably! Until then, I’ll return you to the regular C&K content you know and love.

The Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2024 (24 Day) retails for £149 at Lovehoney UK and $199 at Lovehoney US, and contains £457/$530 worth of products! Move fast if you want one – these usually sell out by mid November. Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the this set to review. All views are mine (with occasional input from Mr C&K!) Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Review] Lovehoney x Womanizer Sex Toy Advent Calendar For Couples 2022

Once again, my lovely pals at Lovehoney have sent me their advent calendar for couples, this year created in partnership with Womanizer. And once again, I’m going to be opening a door a day and telling you about the products inside.

This kit, as the name implies, is aimed at “couples”, which assumes one penis-owner and one vulva-owner. There are several other adult advent calendars for couples in the range including 12 day toy calendars for different types of bodies and a 7 day lingerie calendar.

I’m going to try a slightly different format this year as I review this kit: giving you some basic product info, some pros and cons, and a quick final verdict on each product.

Day 1: Bullet Vibrator

Gold bullet vibrator from Lovehoney Sex Toy Advent Calendar 2022

Product Info

  • Material: ABS plastic
  • Colour: Shiny gold with a black Lovehoney heart insignia.
  • Body safe? Yes – ABS is non-porous and non-toxic.
  • Power: Rechargeable, cable included.
  • Speeds/patterns: 3 constant speeds, 7 patterns
  • Waterproof: Yes, submersible.
  • Size: 3″ in length, 0.8″ in diameter.
  • Lube compatible: Yes, all kinds.
  • Cleaning: Gentle soap and warm water or a 10% bleach solution.

Pros

  • Surprisingly powerful for its small size
  • Small enough to slide between bodies during penetrative sex other activities
  • Versatile and suitable for a wide range of body parts

Cons

  • A little more buzzy than I would like
  • Only one button, making it a little annoying to select the pattern you want

Verdict

A decent, basic bullet vibrator. Unlikely to satisfy serious power fans or those who really need rumbles, but otherwise perfectly serviceable and does what it says on the tin.

Day 2: Ribbed Penis Stroker

Product Info

  • Material: TPE, I think
  • Colour: Translucent white
  • Body safe? Kinda. TPE isn’t toxic but it is porous and will harbour bacteria
  • Waterproof: Yes, submersible
  • Size: 4″ in length, very stretchy
  • Lube compatible: Yes, water-based only
  • Cleaning: Gentle soap and warm water. Please note that TPE can be washed but cannot be sterilised

Pros

  • Small pocket in the side, allowing you to insert yesterday’s bullet vibrator (or any bullet vibe of your choice)
  • Soft, squishy feeling material
  • Very stretchy, making it suitable for the vast majority of dick sizes
  • Nice internal texturing

Cons

  • Material cannot be fully sterilised due to its porous nature
  • Material is already starting to tear around the holes
  • Likely only good for a few uses

Verdict

An okay stroker for a few uses, or for a beginner to find out if this is a sensation they enjoy. It won’t last long, though, so if you enjoy using it I recommend upgrading to a silicone stroker ASAP.

Day 3: Wrist Restraints

Wrist restraints from Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar

Product Info

  • Material: Polypropylene with plastic hardwear
  • Colour: Black with gold clips
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: No
  • Size: Each cuff is 14″ in total length
  • Cleaning: Wipe clean if necessary

Pros

  • Highly adjustable to fit the vast majority of people
  • Velcro fastenings are quick to undo, making them safe and beginner-friendly
  • Can be clipped together using the attached gold clips

Cons

  • Material isn’t particularly soft so not very comfortable for long-term wear
  • Not very strong so only suitable for light bondage activities

Verdict

These are a very basic set of cuffs. They’re serviceable for complete beginners and very light bondage, and may help you to discover whether being restrained or restraining your partner is something you enjoy. If you do, though, consider upgrading to a set of proper bondage cuffs if you can.

Day 4: Mint Orgasm Balm

Mint orgasm balm for Lovehoney Sex Toy Advent Calendar 2022 review

This product, very similar to Lovehoney’s Bliss Orgasm Balm (a surprising winner and a fave I return to again and again) is designed to be applied to external erogenous zones such as the clit and nipples. The menthol provides a cooling, tingling sensation that brings additional bloodflow to the area and increases sensitivity.

Product Info

  • Packaging: A small gold tin with black detailing
  • Body-safe? Yes, as long as you’re not allergic/sensitive to any of the ingredients
  • Vegan? Unfortunately not, as it contains beeswax
  • Safe for use in water: Yes
  • Clean-up: You’ll need to use plenty of soap and warm water as this is an oil-based product

Pros

  • Really does enhance pleasure – the extra sensitivity is glorious
  • Great for an all-day tease or kinky edging/orgasm control games.
  • A little goes a long way

Cons

  • Oily consistency makes clean-up a little annoying
  • Strong minty scent can linger even after washing

Verdict

Having tried variations on this product previously (including in last year’s calendar), I’m not at all surprised to say that today’s item is a hit. I really love this stuff.

Day 5: G-Spot Dildo

Purple silicone G-spot dildo from Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar 2022

Product Info

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Purple
  • Body safe? Yes, silicone is phthalate-free and non-porous
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 5″ insertable length, 1.59″ diameter at widest point
  • Lube-compatible: Yes, water-based only
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, antibacterial soap and water, a 10% bleach solution, boiling, or dishwasher

Pros

  • Lovely curve, ideal for targeting the G-spot
  • Soft silicone with a firm head
  • Has a slot in the base to insert the bullet vibe from day 1 (or any bullet vibrator)
  • Flared base for anal safety

Cons

  • Bullet can get kinda stuck if you accidentally wedge it in too far
  • Base isn’t quite wide enough to use with a harness

Verdict

This is a lovely little dildo. Body-safe, a non-threatening size (suitable for the less experienced toy users this calendar is really aimed at), and suitable for use with or without a vibrator. If I was going to make one change, I’d make the base a little wider to make it harness-compatible for strap-on sex.

Day 6: Thick Cock Ring

Thick cock ring from Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar

Product Info

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes, silicone is phthalate-free and non-porous
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 1.5″ basic diameter but very stretchy
  • Lube-compatible: Yes – water-based is best
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, antibacterial soap and water, a 10% bleach solution, boiling, or dishwasher

Pros

  • Soft, body-safe silicone
  • Thick cock ring design makes it comfortable to wear
  • Super stretchy to accommodate the vast majority of penis sizes
  • Comes with a useful (multilingual) safety guide

Cons

  • None – this is a great basic toy.

Verdict

An excellent basic cock ring. No criticisms here; it’s body-safe, will fit the vast majority of users, and should last for years if you look after it.

Day 7: Blindfold

Lovehoney black and gold blindfold

Product Info

  • Material: Polyester
  • Colour: Black with gold detailing
  • Waterproof: No
  • Size: 7″ across, 2.5″ top to bottom
  • Cleaning: Not washable – wipe clean only

Pros

  • Plushy padding makes it comfortable to wear
  • Stretchy elastic to fit most users
  • Super pretty gold-on-black “night sky” design
  • Doubles nicely as a cute sleep mask

Cons

  • Cheap fabric that starts to pull at the edges after a couple uses
  • Not quite big enough to completely block vision

Verdict

This is okay as a very basic blindfold. If you’re brand new to this sort of play or just wanting something you can pop over your/your partner’s eyes for a kinky twist without aiming for complete sensory deprivation, it’s fine. But it could do with being slightly bigger (to better block the light). Though the design is pretty, the cheap fabric and inability to wash it means it’s unlikely to last particularly long.

Day 8: Sandalwood Scented Candle

Sandalwood scented candle from Lovehoney

Product Info

A small (40g) sandalwood-scented candle in a little gold and black tin.

Pros

  • Lovely, earthy sandalwood scent – ideal for setting the mood for a romantic night in

Cons

  • Not suitable for wax play
  • May be unsuitable for those with fragrance sensitivities as the scent is quite strong when lit

Verdict

It’s a nice extra if you’re someone who likes to light candles during sex (or just enjoys using scented candles to make your space smell nice.

Unlike last year’s candle, I don’t feel at all confident suggesting that this one is suitable for wax play. Its melting point is not clear and the addition of scents can sometimes make candles burn much hotter so, since it is not specifically stated as a wax play-safe candle, I wouldn’t take the risk. Choose a wax play candle or massage candle if you want to apply the wax to your skin.

Day 9: Crystal Butt Plug

Crystal butt plug by Lovehoney

Product Info

  • Material: Aluminium and acrylic
  • Colour: Gold with a purple jewel
  • Body safe? Yes, aluminium is a body-safe metal for sex toys as long as you are not allergic/sensitive to this metal
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 3″ total length, 2.5″ insertable length, 1.1″ diameter at widest point
  • Lube-compatible: Yes, any kind of lube
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, antibacterial soap and water, or a 10% bleach solution. Do not boil or put in the dishwasher as this may cause the glue holding the gem in place to melt

Pros

  • Super pretty and with a purple gem – my favourite colour!
  • Small, non-threatening size makes it friendly for beginners
  • Rigid material means you get a lot of sensation from a small toy
  • Can be warmed up or cooled down for versatile, temperature-based play

Cons

  • Rigid base can dig in after a while, making it uncomfortable (and unlikely to be suitable for all-day wear)
  • There was already a little damage on the gem when I unboxed it, cheapening the overall look

Verdict

A cute, beginner-friendly crystal butt plug ideal for anyone curious about using metal toys for the first time. Its body-safe material and flared base mean you can enjoy it with confidence. Pro tip: if anal play feels really intense, coupling it with stimulation of your clitoris or penis can massively enhance the pleasure.

Day 10: Mini Wand Vibrator

Mini wand vibrator from Lovehoney

Product Info

  • Material: ABS plastic body, silicone head
  • Colour: Black with a gold Lovehoney heart insignia
  • Body safe? Yes, silicone is fully non-porous and non-toxic
  • Waterproof: It doesn’t specify, so I assume not
  • Speeds/patterns: 3 speeds, 8 patterns
  • Size: 5″ total length, head 1.3″ diameter at widest point
  • Lube-compatible: Yes, any kind of lube
  • Cleaning: Clean the head using a body-safe sterile wipe or an antibacterial toy cleaning spray – don’t get the whole thing wet

Pros

  • Very light and highly portable
  • Flexible neck for easy positioning
  • Ideal for penises, nipples, and other erogenous zones as well as clits

Cons

  • Vibrations are only middling strength and quite buzzy
  • Unlike Day 1’s bullet vibrator, this one does not come pre-charged so you’ll need to charge it up before you play
  • Only 1 button, making it a little annoying to find the speed/pattern you want if you like to change between them

Verdict

This is a mediocre vibe. The vibration strength isn’t terrible but it’s not great either, and the overall effect is far more “buzz” than “rumble.” As a warmup toy or one for those who prefer weaker vibrations, it’s fine (the body-safe materials and flexible neck give it some points) but as a more experienced toy user I got very little out of it and I’m unlikely to use it again.

Day 11: Nipple Clamps

Lovehoney nipple clamps

Product Info

  • Material: Plastic with silicone tips
  • Colour: Gold with purple tips
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 3″ in length
  • Cleaning: Wipe clean if necessary

Pros

  • Really cute gold-and-purple design with festive star decals
  • Comfortable to wear and not too pinchy
  • Adjustable via a simple slider mechanism

Cons

  • Not likely to fit anyone with large nipples
  • Adjustment slider scratches the gold plating off the clamps
  • They don’t stay on very well and pop off at the slightest tug

Verdict

These nipple clamps are really pretty and cute, but I don’t think they’re very high quality. The slider scratching off the plating means they won’t retain their appearance for very long and they don’t stay on for very long. They’ll be fine for a few wears if you just want them to look pretty, but don’t expect much more than that from them.

Day 12: Vanilla Massage Oil

Lovehoney vanilla massage oil

Product Info

A small (30ml) bottle of vanilla-scented massage oil. It contains the same 4 ingredients as in last year’s calendar, which I discussed in detail in that review.

Pros

  • Distinctive and pleasant vanilla smell
  • Nice sensory properties – glides on smoothly and doesn’t leave skin feeling greasy

Cons

  • Dries out quickly so needs reapplying often
  • May be unsuitable for those with fragrance allergies/sensitivities

Verdict

This is a perfectly nice massage oil with a distinctive (but not overpowering) scent. It’s pleasant to use and left my skin feeling soft and healthy. Massage can be a fun precursor to sex or a lovely activity in its own right. If you enjoy using it, you can grab a bottle of Lovehoney’s Oh! Vanilla Massage Oil for £5.99 when this one runs out.

Day 13: Tickler

Feather tickler

Product Info

A purple feathery tickler (made from polyester and nylon) on a black velcro ring, designed for running over your or your partner’s body.

Pros

  • Feels nice and soft
  • Works well with other items from the kit, such as the blindfold and cuffs, to create a fun sensation play scene
  • Adjustable loop means you can wear it on your fingers like a ring or just hold it in your hand

Cons

  • No easy way to get it clean – if you get bodily fluids on it, consider it bonded to that person

Verdict

A nice little addition to the kit. Sensation play can be a great way into exploring BDSM and kink, or enjoying intense sensation if pain isn’t your thing. Remember that it can still be intense, and tickling in particular can be edge play or even a hard limit for some people. As with anything else, ALWAYS check in with your partner and get consent.

Day 14: Textured Stroker

Textured stroker

Product Info

  • Material: TPE
  • Colour: Translucent white
  • Body safe? Sort of. TPE isn’t toxic, but it is porous and will harbour bacteria.
  • Waterproof: Yes, submersible
  • Size: 6″ long and 4″ wide when flat
  • Lube compatible: Yes, water-based is recommended
  • Cleaning: Gentle soap and warm water. Please note that TPE can be washed but cannot be sterilised.

Pros

  • Nice ribbed and dotted texturing
  • Flat wrap-around design makes it suitable for all penis sizes

Cons

  • Weird powdery texture that makes my sensory issues unhappy
  • Material cannot be properly sterilised due to its porous nature
  • May only last a few uses

Verdict

This is an interesting design; I like that it’s flat and wrap-around rather than the usual tube shape, and the texturing is excellent. Due to it being made of porous TPE, which will start to break down after a while, it’s probably only going to last a short time. Grab a silicone stroker if you enjoy this sensation and want a longer-lasting toy!

Day 15: Ankle Cuffs

Lovehoney ankle cuffs

Product Info

  • Material: Polypropylene with plastic hardwear
  • Colour: Black with gold clips
  • Body safe? Yes
  • Waterproof: No
  • Size: Each cuff is 14″ in total length
  • Cleaning: Wipe clean if necessary

Pros

  • Go with the wrist restraints from Day 3 to make a full 4-way restraint set
  • Highly adjustable to fit the vast majority of people
  • Velcro fastenings are quick to undo, making them safe and beginner-friendly
  • Can be clipped together using the attached gold clips

Cons

  • The wrist and ankle restraints should really have been ONE day in the calendar, not 2 separate ones
  • Material isn’t particularly soft so not very comfortable for long-term wear
  • Not very strong so only suitable for light bondage activities

Verdict

Like the matching wrist restraints, these are a very basic set of ankle cuffs. They’re a fine introduction to bondage for complete beginners and will work fine if light restraint is all you want to do. If you’re interested in exploring restraint in a more intense way, though, consider upgrading to a set of proper bondage cuffs if you can.

Day 16: Body Massager

Plastic body massager

Product Info

A purple (with gold glitter) plastic body massager shaped like a five-pointed star. It measures 6″ in total length and each point is approximately 2″ in length.

Pros

  • Very light
  • Ergonomic design makes it comfortable to hold
  • A great way to give massages without tiring your hands or wrists (particularly good for those who experience pain in those areas)
  • Versatile: use all five points at once, or one at a time for a more focused sensation
  • Feels AMAZING. I keep reaching for mine to get the knots out of my back after spending too long working on my computer
  • Sparkles!

Cons

  • None – I actually really love this one.

Verdict

If you like the kind of deep tissue massage that sort of hurts a little bit but also feels really good, you’re going to love this one. Massage can be a great way in to sex, or a wonderful and sensual activity by itself. Combine this with the massage oil from day 12 if you like!

Day 17: Anal Beads

Silicone anal beads

Product Info

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Black
  • Body safe? Yes, silicone is non-porous and non-toxic, making it fully body-safe
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 6″ total length, insertable length 5″, widest bead 1.2″ in diameter
  • Lube-compatible: Yes, water-based only
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, antibacterial soap and water, a 10% bleach solution, boiling, or dishwasher

Pros

  • Can be used with the bullet vibe from day 1
  • Super soft silicone
  • Flexible for comfortable insertion and wear

Cons

  • Quite long – may feel intimidating to beginners

Verdict

A lovely set of anal beads. They score top marks for body-safe materials, flexible shaft with firm beads, and the ability to turn them into a vibrating toy by adding the bullet vibe from this kit (or any other bullet in your collection.)

Day 18: Finger Vibe Sleeve

Silicone finger vibe sleeve

Product Info

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Purple
  • Body safe? Yes, silicone is both non-porous and non-toxic, making it an ideal safe sex toy material
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: Just over 2″ total length
  • Lube-compatible: Yes, water-based only
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, antibacterial soap and water, a 10% bleach solution, boiling, or dishwasher

Pros

  • Pairs with the bullet vibe from day 1
  • Super soft silicone
  • Fun way to bring something new to hand sex (either solo or partnered)

Cons

  • Silicone dampens the vibrations somewhat
  • Smallish finger loop may mean it won’t fit those with larger hands/fingers
  • Couldn’t feel the texturing in use

Verdict

Finger vibes can be a fun add-on to hand sex, particularly clitoral play. I like the basic design of this finger vibe, but it’s let down by the lacklustre texturing. It needs to be much more pronounced to have any effect for any but the most sensitive of clits. But if you find the bullet vibe too intense by itself or prefer the softer feeling of silicone over hard plastic, this is a nice addition to the kit.

Day 19: Sex Dice

Lovehoney sex dice

Product Info

A pair of dice, one listing acts (such as “kiss”, “nibble”, etc.) and one listing body parts. The idea is that you roll them together and then do the act stipulated.

Pros

  • Can be a fun way to explore different sensations
  • Sex is best when there’s laughter, and this guarantees plenty of that
  • Not gendered

Cons

  • Occasionally baffling combinations (no, I do not want you to suck my back, thanks!)

Verdict

I don’t have anything against the concept of sex dice, but I think they’re just not really for me. I prefer sex to be fluid rather than gamified and I’d rather just communicate and do what feels good in the moment. So while I think these would probably be great for some people (I’ve particularly found that sex games like this can be a fun icebreaker in group sex scenarios), I don’t think I’m one of those people.

Day 20: Spanking Paddle

Lovehoney mini spanking paddle from sex toy advent calendar

Product Info

A mini spanking paddle decorated with a pretty black and gold design in silky fabric on one side, and plain black faux leather on the other side. The paddle measures 9″ in total length.

Pros

  • A fairly non-scary beginner paddle that delivers a gentle sting rather than anything more painful
  • Pretty aesthetic
  • Slightly different sensations from each side
  • Loop handle makes it easy to hold and store

Cons

  • Loud noise can be problematic if you have family or roommates at home
  • Not particlarly robust

Verdict

This is a nice enough beginner spanking paddle. It’s gentle enough to be suitable for complete BDSM novices, though unlikely to do much for fans of more intense pain play. It might not last very long if you’re doing anything more than very gentle play with it, but it’s fine for figuring out if spanking and impact play are things you enjoy.

Day 21: Sexy Snap Position Cards

sexy snap position cards

Product Info

A set of cards featuring various sex positions, plus instructions for two different games to play with them.

Pros

  • Quite inclusive; many of the positions will work for either vaginal or anal sex with their a bio cock or a strap-on.
  • Fun, playful and non-threatening way to try out new positions.
  • Reminds me of this scene from The Bold Type where Jane, Kat and Sutton test out one of Sage’s sex positions to “verify it’s physically possible.” I’m always happy to be reminded of my favourite show

Cons

  • Some of them require ridiculous core strength, upper body strength, or just indestructible furniture to pull off

Verdict

To be honest, my approach to penetrative sex has typically been “find two or three positions that work and just rotate them depending on mood and energy levels.” I imagine this is fairly normal, especially in long-term sexual relationships. If you’d like to try something new, this game will give you some inspiration. Just don’t be put off by the fact that some of these positions are not going to be physically possible for everyone.

Day 22: Under-Mattress Restraints

Lovehoney under-mattress restraints

Product Info

A set of 4-way restraint straps which fit under your mattress and feature loops at each corner to attach cuffs and restrain your partner by all 4 limbs.

Pros

  • Suitable for almost all bed sizes as they are highly adjustable
  • Easy to tuck out of sight if necessary
  • Pair them with the cuffs from Day 3 and Day 15 or with any other set of cuffs you own.
  • Quick, safe, and non-threatening introduction to bondage

Cons

  • None – this is a really nice inclusion.

Verdict

I’ve been after a set of these for ages but always assumed they wouldn’t fit my giant bed. Happily, I was wrong! These are strong, easy to set up, and safe to use as long as you observe some basic safety protocol (e.g. never leaving a bound person alone and always playing with a safeword.) These might be among my favourite items in the whole kit!

Day 23: Couple’s Cock Ring

couple's cock ring

Product Info

  • Material: Silicone
  • Colour: Purple
  • Body safe? Yes, silicone is both non-porous and non-toxic, making it a completely body-safe sex toy material
  • Waterproof: Yes
  • Size: 3″ total length, with a 1″ “tongue” for clitoral stimulation
  • Lube-compatible: Yes, water-based only
  • Cleaning: A body-safe sterile wipe, antibacterial soap and water, a 10% bleach solution, boiling, or dishwasher

Pros

  • Pairs with the bullet vibe from day 1 (or any other bullet in your collection)
  • Soft silicone
  • Stretchy to fit most penis sizes
  • Nice texturing on the clitoral stimulator

Cons

  • Vibrations feel very weak once transmitted through the silicone
  • Clitoral stimulator is too flimsy to really be satisfying

Verdict

I have long come to the conclusion that vibrating cock rings are better in theory than in practice, at least for me. This one seems well designed on the surface, and I do like that it’s designed to fit a wide range of bodies and that the clitoral stimulator portion is textured. Unfortunately, in practice, it’s too flimsy and flexible to provide any kind of pressure or sustained stimulation.

Day 24: Womanizer Liberty

womanizer liberty

Product Info

  • Material: ABS plastic body with silicone nozzle
  • Colour: Purple with white nozzle and buttons
  • Body safe? Yes, ABS plastic and silicone are both body-safe and non-porous
  • Waterproof: Yes., submersible
  • Size: 4″ total length
  • Speeds/patterns: 6 speeds
  • Lube-compatible: Yes, water-based lube is best with silicone toys
  • Cleaning: Remove the nozzle and clean with a body-safe sterile wipe, antibacterial soap and water, a 10% bleach solution, by boiling, or in the dishwasher. Wipe the body clean if necessary.

Pros

  • Comes with a little case, making it discreet and travel-friendly
  • Suitable for use in the bath or shower
  • Light and comfortable to hold
  • Easy to clean due to the removable nozzle
  • Feels AMAZING

Cons

  • A little loud at the top speeds

Verdict

I had a feeling the Womanizer Liberty might turn out to be the crowning glory of the set and I was right. Once again, Womanizer – the original purveyors of suction-based clitoral stimulators – have knocked it out of the park. This amazing little stimulator is easy to hold and use, powerful, and feels incredible. On top of all that, it’s travel-friendly and waterproof. Top marks.

See you next year!

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the 2022 Advent Calendar for Couples, which retails for £130 and contains £374.99 worth of products, to review. All views are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post and shopping through them helps to keep the site going!

[Toy Review] Lovehoney Best Night Ever Couple’s Sex Toy Kit

It’s already day ten of the #12DaysofLovehoney project! After today, I have just one more review to publish and then the very special giveaway coming on Saturday. Today, we’re looking at Lovehoney’s “Best Night Ever” Couple’s Sex Toy Kit.

Oh, and while you’re here, check out the whole series!

What’s in the Box and Who Is It For?

The Best Night Ever kit is one of Lovehoney’s sex toy bundles. It includes five toys:

  • Vibrating silicone butt plug
  • Silver bullet vibe
  • Stretchy silicone cock ring that can be used with or without the bullet vibrator
  • Finger vibrator
  • Reversible penis stroker
Box of Lovehoney Best Night Ever sex toy kit for couples

This kit is designed for a couple consisting of a person with a penis and a person with a vulva. (The packaging and ad copy does, sadly, use gendered language along the “for him” and “for her” lines.) So bear that in mind as we proceed with the review. I’d love to see Lovehoney come out with some additional, similar kits that are geared at couples with two penis owners or two vulva owners!

Sex toys for couples in Lovehoney Best Night Ever kit

I thought I’d look at each item in turn, and then at the set as a whole.

Silicone Butt Plug

This is probably the best item in the kit from a quality point of view. It’s a little over 5″ in length, of which 4″ are insertable. It tapers to a narrow tip, making it comfortable to insert, and the silicone base makes it both body-safe and comfortable to wear for some time.

Silicone butt plug from Lovehoney couples sex toys kit

The silicone butt plug takes 1 AAA battery, and offers 3 vibration speeds and 7 patterns. The vibrations are mediocre in strength and fairly buzzy, but the plug itself is of great quality. If you’re looking for a basic, slimline plug, the Best Night Ever kit has got you covered.

Silver Bullet Vibe

As far as I can tell, this is near identical to the silver bullet vibe that Lovehoney sells as a separate product… and that was the first sex toy I ever bought at the tender age of 18!

It’s made of hard ABS plastic and takes one AAA battery. Like the butt plug, it features 3 speeds and 7 patterns. I think it’s the same motor that’s in the butt plug, but the vibrations feel a little stronger. That’s probably because hard plastic doesn’t dampen the vibrations in the same way that silicone does.

Still not super powerful and still pretty buzzy, but overall not a bad first vibe for someone who doesn’t need very intense stimulation to get off. My first little Lovehoney bullet vibe served me well for a good couple of years!

Cock Ring

This silicone cock ring can be used by itself or with the bullet vibe. It features two rings, one to go around the penis and one behind the testicles. The rings are very slim and stretchy, allowing them to fit snugly but comfortably around most penises.

Silver bullet vibrator and silicone cock ring

The purpose of a cock ring is to restrict blood flow out of the penis, making the wearer’s erection harder and longer lasting. At first glance, I wasn’t sure this ring would do anything. However, it’s stronger than it looks!

Using it with the bullet vibe can provide some gentle additional stimulation which can be pleasurable for both the wearer and their partner.

Finger Vibe

The finger vibrator is the weakest aspect of this kit, for me. For one thing, the ring you use to put it on your finger is ridiculously small. I have pretty tiny hands and found it too tight and uncomfortable on any but my little finger.

Finger vibrator from Lovehoney sex toys couples kit

Second, the vibrations are truly pathetic. I didn’t know it was possible for something to be so buzzy it makes my clitoris itch, but here we are. There’s no way this would ever do anything for me except numb me out and make me grumpy.

Reversible Stroker

The reversible stroker provides two different sensations. It’s tight but stretchy, so whatever size your penis is you can expect a snug and pleasurable fit. You’ll need to use plenty of lube both inside the stroker and on the penis, or it could be uncomfortable.

The reversible stroker is made of a TPE style soft plastic which, while not toxic and safe for external play, is a porous material. That means it will degrade over time. You’ll probably get a few months out of it, but I recommend investing in a silicone stroker once you’ve established that you like the sensation!

Best Night Ever Kit: Overall Contents & Value

The Best Night Ever sex toy kit is a mixed bag. The items are of decent quality and made of body-safe materials. However, where it really falls down is in the strength (or lack thereof) of the motors.

Best Night Ever sex toys for couples kit

That being said, this kit retails for a pretty affordable £39.99 ($49.99 US), which is cheaper than buying all the products separately. If you’re new to toys and just trying things out to see what you like, this kit could be a good place to start. For people who are just looking for a few basic staples, it will probably serve your needs, too. If you’re after more powerful toys, though, skip the kit and invest in one powerful vibrator instead.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product to review! Views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this and all my review posts. Want to support the blog? Buying me a coffee is a great way to do that!

[Toy Review] Lovehoney Ignite Finger Vibrator

Last week, I gushed about how impressed I was with the basic, affordable Ignite Bullet Vibrator from Lovehoney’s new line. Today I’m bringing you another one from the Ignite range – a line of simple, no-frills toys that all retail for £29.99. Read on to learn what I thought of the Ignite Finger Vibrator.

Finger on the pulse…

The Lovehoney Ignite Finger Vibrator is a tiny little toy, barely 3 inches in length. You wear it on your finger like a ring. It’s shaped like a teardrop, and tapers to a soft point.

The Lovehoney Ignite Finger Vibrator on my hand

The Ignite Finger Vibrator is fully waterproof, USB rechargeable, and has a travel lock. It also comes with a little drawstring storage bag. On the surface at least, impressive features for a £29.99 toy.

It’s made of the same body-safe, phthalate-free silicone as everything in the range. Too many manufacturers compromise on safety when making entry-level toys – which, needless to say, I am NOT here for. So it’s nice to see companies normalizing body-safe materials as a minimum standard even for their basic ranges.

As ever, a good quality water-based lube will enhance your experience!

Usability

Because this toy is so tiny and light, it could work well for people who find it difficult to manipulate larger or heavier toys. And because it’s worn on the finger, you don’t even have to hold it in place. The small size makes it easy to fit between bodies for clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex, if that’s your jam.

The Ignite Finger Vibrator is definitely made for people with small hands! I have smaller than average hands, and it’s very snug on my index, middle and ring fingers. People with larger hands or thicker fingers will likely find this toy either uncomfortable or just impossible to use.

The Lovehoney Ignite Finger Vibrator

The button placement is also weird. It’s a single-button interface, and the button is on the base of the toy. This means that whichever finger you wear it on, you have to curl your thumb under at an awkward angle to change the setting or turn the toy on and off. It would have made much more sense to place the button on the front of the toy, where the charging port and Lovehoney insignia are.

Power & patterns

The Ignite Finger Vibrator features the same 20 settings (3 constant speeds and 17 patterns) as the rest of the products in the range. I personally think 20 settings is a bit excessive, especially for a toy with a one-button interface (hello endless scrolling to find the one you like!) But I can forgive it because these are entry-level toys, and having lots of settings to try is a good way to find out what you like.

The Lovehoney Ignite Finger Vibrator

The Ignite Finger Vibrator is… not a powerful toy. I’m not sure if it uses a different motor to the bullet (possible, as it’s a noticeably smaller toy) or if the problem is with motor placement. Either way, the Ignite Finger Vibrator’s vibrations are weak and buzzy to the point of numbing.

Some people enjoy gentler vibrations, and if that’s you then you might find this toy perfectly adequate for your needs. But if you’re looking for strong or rumbly vibrations, pass this one by.

Final thoughts: do I recommend it?

I thought I’d have more good things to say about this toy after I was so impressed with the bullet from the same range. Unfortunately, it was really quite disappointing.

Sadly, I can’t really recommend this toy. Its vibrations are too weak and buzzy, and I had to reach for a different toy mid-masturbation to finish the job. Couple that with the awkward button placement and

Even if you’re on a restricted budget or looking for a basic product, there are better toys you can get for your money.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this product to review! All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Hot Octopuss DiGiT & AMO

I received these products in fairly quick succession, so I decided I’d do something a bit different and try a compareview (that’s a comparison/review!) of Hot Octopuss’s two new toys, the DiGiT finger vibe and the AMO bullet. And, because I enjoy a bit of friendly competition, I’m going to award a point in each section of the review and finish by telling you which one I recommend more!

What’s all the buzz?

Hot Octopuss burst onto the adult industry scene in 2013 with the Pulse III, a toy for penis-owners that utilises PulsePlate, a patented technology based on medical science (read more here if you’re a dork, like me. It’s fascinating.) Since then, they’ve branched out, with including an oscillating toy for vulvas, vibrating cock-rings, and a mini version of the Pulse. Their latest two offerings are DiGiT and AMO, pictured above.

DiGiT is a finger-vibrator, with two plastic loops at the base. You pop two fingers through these loops and the shaft of the vibe rests against the length of one finger, essentially becoming an extension of your hand while you play.

AMO is a more traditional bullet vibe, with a shaft that widens at the top and offers one side that has a gentle curve and one with a pinpoint tip for more targeted stimulation.

Stats, Size and Other Important Things

DiGiT and AMO are both USB rechargeable, giving around 40 minutes of running time on a full charge. I would really prefer a longer battery life – it often takes me 20-30 minutes to reach orgasm, which functionally means having to charge the toy before every session.

Both toys are USB rechargeable and waterproof.

Size-wise, there’s not much in it either. DiGiT is slightly heavier (58g to the AMO’s 43g) while AMO is a little longer (9.5cm vs DiGiT’s 8.7cm.)

The Hot Octopuss DiGiT and AMO vibrators lying on a white sheet.
Left: DiGiT. Right: AMO.

The main shaft of both toys is made of soft and body-safe black silicone. The bases (and, in DiGIT’s case, the finger loops) are plastic. A generous slather of water-based lube will improve your experience! They’re a bit small to easily use with condoms, though you could if you felt so inclined. Because these toys are waterproof, you can clean them with gentle soap and warm water. To sterilise them more thoroughly, use a body-safe medical wipe before washing normally.

These toys are designed to be used externally. You could use them inside the vagina if you wished, but they are not anal-safe (especially AMO, which has nothing at all to stop the toy disappearing inside – just don’t risk it, please.)

Thus far, it’s a draw.

Innovation

Now, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with taking a tried-and-true formula and doing it well! Bullet vibes are pretty much a staple in the adult industry – almost every major toy company I can think of have one in their product line. AMO does, however, have an edge over the standard bullet vibes that are everywhere, in that the unique shape really does add something extra (more on that later!)

DiGiT is a more unusual idea. While wear-it-on-your-finger vibrators do, of course, exist elsewhere, all the ones I’ve ever tried have either been made of unsafe materials, had such weak vibrations that my finger could do a better job by itself, or both. The two-loops design is also something I haven’t seen before and makes the toy more comfortable to wear.

DiGiT wins the innovation round!

Aesthetics

Hot Octopuss toys have a distinct style to them, and these two are no exception. DiGiT’s base and finger loops are a kind of brown/bronze colour with a gold band separating the base from the shaft. The Hot Octopuss name is stamped into the silicone on the side of the toy and the crown logo is embossed on one of the finger loops. After just a couple of uses, though, this logo started to rub off. AMO’s plastic base is a dark red at the bottom which fades to black where it blends with the main body at the join. The company name is embossed on the side of the base. Both toys have the Hot Octopuss crown logo stamped on the bottom of their base.

The base of the Hot Octopuss AMO vibrator with the company's crown logo stamped into it.

Aesthetics-wise, AMO wins for me. They’re both perfectly attractive toys but the red and black is such a stylish and sexy combo.

Settings and Controls

On both toys, the on/off/change setting button is on one side of the shaft and the up/down speed buttons are on the other.

The button placement is kinda awkward on the DiGiT. Because it was attached to the fingers of my dominant hand, I could only change the settings by either curling my thumb under at a really unnatural angle or bringing my other hand into play.

The Hot Octopuss DiGiT on s woman's hand.

Full disclosure, though: I’m left-handed. I did also try the toy on my right hand and this does, indeed, make the button placement feel somewhat more intuitive (the up/down buttons are perfectly placed to press them with your thumb). It loses points for me, though, for being significantly less accessible and user-friendly for lefties like myself.

The button placement is much less of an issue on the AMO simply because of the way you use it. When I used it in my left hand, the speed buttons were well placed to easily push with my index finger.

DiGiT has five speeds and five patterns, while AMO has six speeds and five patterns

AMO takes the point again for user-friendliness and for that one additional speed.

Which is more powerful?

They’re… honestly identical.

I haven’t confirmed this with Hot Octopuss directly but I would be stunned if it was not the exact same motor in both toys.

To a power-queen like myself, these toys are what I would define as middling-powerful. The vibrations are strong and reasonably rumbly, but not blow-your-socks-off. They’re both slow-build toys for me; not powerful enough to get me off in five minutes, but certainly not “vainly smooshing it against my clitoris and vainly hoping I feel SOMETHING” either.

It’s a draw on this one.

My experience in use

I enjoyed using both of these toys. However, I don’t see myself reaching for the DiGiT for solo play very often in the future. AMO, though, has joined the pile of regular, reliable toys which lives in the easy access basket by my bed.

The reason for this is simple: the shapes! DiGiT’s smooth surface felt perfectly nice, but AMO’s pinpoint tip really blew me away. Unless the vibrations in a toy are EXTREMELY powerful, I tend to need fairly concentrated clitoral stimulation to get maximum enjoyment out of it. The AMO’s shape is perfect for angling against my clit for just the right level of direct stimulation. Mmmm!

No contest in this one: AMO wins hands-down.

Price

DiGiT retails for £59.95 directly from Hot Octopuss, and AMO retails for £49.95.

The price difference here makes this an easy one – AMO takes another point.

So which one should I get?

As we’ve seen, these toys are functionally quite similar in a number of ways. I enjoyed using both of them, and will certainly use them again. However, thanks to its aesthetic, that delicious pinpoint tip, and the slightly cheaper price, I personally recommend AMO over DiGiT.

A special discount just for you…

From right now until 23 December 2019, my readers can get 20% off both DiGiT and AMO! Just buy directly from Hot Octopuss using my links and enter code CAK20. You’re welcome!

Thanks to Hot Octopuss for sending me these products to review. All views are, as ever, completely my own. Affiliate links are contained within this post.