Tag: dildo

Text on pink background reads "Mr Hankey's Toys The Big Pop"

[Toy Review] Mr Hankey’s Toys Big Pop

Published on by Amy

Something regular readers will know about me is that I like my toys bright, colourful, sparkly, in unusual aesthetics, and girly as hell. This is one reason I don’t often gravitate towards strictly realistic dildos. However, one of the things I love about Mr Hankey’s Toys is that all their various designs, from the realistic to the fantastical, can be customised from a range of 24 colours. You’ll understand, then, why I felt compelled to request the Big Pop giant realistic dildo in the brightest shade of pink they have.

What is the Mr Hankey’s Toys Big Pop?

Mr Hankey's Big Pop realistic giant dildo in bubblegum pink

The Big Pop by Mr Hankey’s Toys is a realistic dildo available in four giant sizes. Even the size Small measures 10″ in total length and 2.2″ in diameter at the widest point. The largest size, the 4XL, is 17.25″ in length and 4.29″ in diameter at the widest point. I requested the second size up, which is 12″ in length and has a head diameter of 2.86″.

The Big Pop is available in four firmness levels. I requested the 75% soft, the second softest option, to offset the sheer size of the thing! If you prefer greater intensity, select the medium firm or extra firm density. If you want to ease into using oversized toys more gently, consider one of the two softer options. Extras such as a metallic effect and vac-u-lock hole for use with a fucking machine are also available.

Mr Hankey's Big Pop realistic giant dildo in bubblegum pink

The design of the Big Pop is based on a circumcised penis with an ultra-pronounced head. The name comes from the “popping” feeling that you can get when you thrust with a toy of this shape. It also has a skin-like textured shaft, lifelike ridge, realistic balls, and a gentle curve.

Like all Mr Hankey’s Toys, this dildo is made of body-safe silicone.

Big Pop Giant Realistic Dildo In Use: What I Like About This Toy

Again, I think one of the biggest selling points of Mr Hankey’s Toys is the customisation options they offer. Flesh-coloured realistic dildos aren’t really my jam, but this one makes me smile every time I look at it. It’s such a brilliant and ridiculous shade of bubblegum pink juxtaposed with the realistic design.

The first thing to know about the Big Pop is that it really is absolutely fucking huge. Seriously, look at the specs and visualise what 10″ or 12″ or 17″ actually looks like before you buy. Over the years I’ve been doing this work, I’ve been asked about giant realistic dildos in body-safe materials more times than I can count. For that reason alone I’m glad this toy and Hankey’s range of other realistic dildos exist.

As always, Mr Hankey’s Toys’ attention to detail is excellent. From the skin texturing and veins to the lifelike balls, it’s clear care has been taken to make this dildo as realistic as possible.

This toy really is about the head. Its size, shape, realistic detail, and pronounced design are what most users will buy this dildo for. If you want a dildo that offers a feeling of fullness alongside some seriously intense and targeted G-spot or prostate stimulation, the Big Pop is the one for you.

Big Pop dildo head close-up

This is also clearly a dildo made with thrusting in mind (though, as we’ll see in the next section, this isn’t the only way to enjoy it.) As it slides in and out, the ridge of the head stimulates the sensitive nerve-endings around the vaginal or anal opening.

The 75% soft was the perfect density choice for this toy, in my view. It’s not so soft that the dildo becomes difficult to insert, but it’s soft enough to dial down the intensity a little.

Though it’s a pretty long toy, particular at the larger sizes, the Big Pop giant realistic dildo is a dream toy for serious girth lovers. You don’t need to use the entire shaft if you don’t want to; in fact, you could literally just use the head and the first inch or two if that’s what works best for you. For those who enjoy girthy insertables and a feeling of stretch, the Big Pop allows you to explore this with either deep or shallow penetration.

Things to Be Aware Of

As with any very large toy, this is not a “slip it in and get off quickly” dildo. Using a toy of this size requires preparation, warm-up, patience, and even more lube than you think you’ll need. All of this applies doubly if you’re considering using this toy anally. Don’t put pressure on yourself to take the entire thing side you, now or ever. Listen to your body, do what feels good, and stop straight away if anything hurts.

Huge realistic pink dildo

The key selling point of the Big Pop realistic dildo is that ultra-pronounced giant head. However, some people may find this uncomfortable, particularly if you’ve been used to smoother toys. Again, take your time. If you find thrusting with this toy painful or uncomfortable, try gently wiggling it, rotating it, or even just putting it in and then keeping it still. Many people find consistent pressure against their G-spot or prostate more pleasurable than repeated pounding.

Due to the size and slight curve, this toy also isn’t great for hands-free use. Its weight and top-heavy design means it’s hard to get it to stand up reliably on its own. This isn’t an issue for me as I don’t tend to use toys that way. But if you like to ride your toys in a hands-free position it’s something to be aware of.

Mr Hankey’s Toys Big Pop Giant Realistic Dildo: Verdict

Far from being yet another generic realistic dildo, the Mr Hankey’s Big Pop is clear about the need it’s filling and does so damn well. For people who want an oversized toy that offers intense stimulation to both the sensitive vaginal/anal opening and the G-spot/prostate, it’s an ideal option. The detailing and customisation options elevate it to a premium product that’s worth the price.

The Big Pop dildo retails at prices starting from $129.95 for the smallest size. Larger sizes are of course more expensive, and customisations and add-ons also affect the final price.

Thanks to Mr Hankey’s Toys for sponsoring this review. All views and writing are, as always, my own.

Two women in bed together with just their arms and part of their torsos showing above a white blanket. Text reads "why do people like ultra realistic dildos?"

Why Do People Like Ultra Realistic Dildos? (And 4 Fun Ways to Play With Them)

Published on by Amy

In the years (9 of them! Happy anniversary, C&K!) that I’ve been writing about sex and reviewing sex toys, I’ve learned a lot about both my own preferences and those of others. When it comes to dildos, the ones I most gravitate towards tend to be colourful, sparkly, or otherwise non-realistic. However, the good folks at Epic Dildos invited me to write about ultra realistic dildos for them, so I’ve been taking some time to think about why so many people enjoy these toys and some of the fun ways to use them.

Using Ultra Realistic Dildos to Achieve a Lifelike Sensation

I do not believe that sex toys are, or ever can be, replacements for human partners. The term “battery-operated boyfriend” can get in the bin. And let’s not even talk about those vibrators with faces and personalities that the incredible Epiphora reviewed all the way back in 2015.

So no, a dildo cannot replace a penis-owning human. However, if you want to enjoy the feeling of having sex with a person with a bio-cock and don’t have a suitable partner available (or are just in the mood for some solo sex), a realistic dildo is a great option. It’s not entirely identical, of course, but a good realistic toy can be damn close in terms of physical sensation.

Dual-density materials such as the Flexiskin™ liquid silicone Epic Dildos uses for their hyper realistic range combine a soft, malleable outer layer with a firm inner core to mimic an erect penis.

Fulfilling Fantasies with Ultra Realistic Dildos

Like all sex toys, dildos can be enjoyed as much alone or with a partner. One of the most surprisingly common uses I hear about for ultra realistic dildos? Fulfilling threesome or group sex fantasies.

Threesomes are consistently cited in various surveys and studies as one of the most common sexual fantasies. However, choosing to have one in real life is a big decision and not to be taken lightly. When done right, they can be amazing. However, if they’re done badly, they’re also ripe for coercion (if one party in a relationship is less keen than the other), can spike jealousy and insecurity, and can damage or destroy relationships.

If you fantasise about threesomes or group sex but aren’t sure if you’d want to do it for real, using an ultra realistic dildo can allow you and your partner to bring the fantasy to life without the risk. You won’t get the emotional or psychological impact of having a third person involved, but you can simulate some of the physical sensations, do some amazing dirty talk, and spin a scene or story together using toys.

Enjoying Dicks of Different Shapes and Sizes

If you’re monogamous, prefer to have sex with only a single partner at a time, or don’t want to have any sexual partners (at the moment or ever), ultra realistic dildos offer a fun and safe way to enjoy sexual variety. Just as all human cocks are different, so are all the varieties of realistic dildos on the market.

Want to experience bigger or smaller, curved or straight, semi-soft or ultra-firm? The amazing range of realistic dildos out there has got you covered. As a bonus, some offer additional features you can’t get with a bio-cock, such as vibrations.

Ultra Realistic Dildos as a Gender-Affirming Choice

My girlfriend Em and I have started referring to my choice of dildos as “gender-affirming.” I’m a femme who is also primarily submissive, and choosing toys that feel like “me” has felt increasingly important as I explore my role as a strap-on top.

Just as sparkly, colourful dildos feel gender-affirming for me, ultra realistic dildos can feel the same way for other folks. Trans men, transmasculine people, and cis men who use dildos or strap-ons are just some of the people who might find that an ultra realistic dildo aligns best with their gender identity and presentation.

Practicing Sexual Skills

None of us get into our first sexual relationship magically knowing how to have good sex. And none of us get into any sexual relationship magically knowing how to have good sex with that person specifically. Sex is a set of skills, from the interpersonal (communicating your desires, paying attention to verbal and non-verbal cues) to the physical. These skills can be learned, honed, and relearned throughout your sexual life.

If you want to learn or practice a specific sexual skill, from giving a certain type of blowjob your partner loves to riding a dick in a particular position, using a realistic dildo is one great and low-pressure way to do that.

4 Ways to Play with Ultra Realistic Dildos

Whether you’ve just got your first realistic dildo or are an aficionado looking for new ways to play, here are a few suggestions you might not have thought about.

Strap It On

Strap-on sex is most often associated with lesbian and sapphic sex, but anyone can enjoy it. For strap-on sex, look for dildos with a base that’s wide but not too deep. Think flat base or suction cup dildos rather than those with balls.

Go Hands-Free

Some ultra realistic dildos come with suction cups, allowing you to affix them to a wall, floor, or other flat surface. This gives you an opportunity to play hands-free, using your hands to do other things to your or your partner’s body.

Pair Your Dildo with Another Toy

Use your dildo internally while you (or your partner) hold a bullet vibrator against your clitoris. Hold a wand vibrator against the base of your dildo for deep, internal rumbles, Insert your dildo anally (if it has a flared base) then use a stroker to stimulate your penis. Get creative and try out different combinations.

Put On a Show

If you enjoy exhibitionism and voyeurism, putting on a sexy show for your partner can be a hot shared experience. Invite them to watch while you touch, tease, or fuck yourself with your toy. Whether you ultimately let them join in or just drive them wild with the visuals? That’s up to you.

Thanks to Epic Dildos for sponsoring this post! All views and writing, as always, are mine.

Header image for Mr Hankey's cyberpunk sex toy review

[Toy Review] Mr Hankey’s Toys Cyberpunk Dildo

Published on by Amy

According to its Wikipedia page, “cyberpunk” is a subgenre of dystopian science fiction that juxtaposes technological advanvements with societal collapse or decay. It’s a tremendously popular genre that appears in books, films, TV shows, video games, and more. Cyberpunk sex toys, though, is a new one to me. Though, of course, we have fantasy creature toys and alien toys and horror toys and mythical creature toys all kinds of other genres represented in the world of dildos, so why not this one? Mr Hankey’s Toys sent me their futuristic “Cyberpunk” sex toy to review.

Let’s get into it.

Mr Hankey’s Cyberpunk Dildo: A Futuristic Sex Toy

The Mr Hankey’s Cyberpunk Dildo has a wavy shape that reminds me of a tongue. (Specifically, it kinda reminds me of that weird disembodied tongue thing I reviewed ages ago, though – spoiler alert – this is thankfully a much better product.) It has a heavy, rounded base (no suction cup.) Its surface is decorated with patterns designed to evoke cybernetic enhancements.

Hr Hankey's yellow/gold dildo with cybernetic design

The Cyberpunk Dildo is available in four sizes, from the small (8.5″ in total length and 2.2″ in diameter at the widest point) to the XL (14.5″ in total length and 3.9″ in diameter at the widest point.) It is also available in four firmless. I requested the Cyberpunk Dildo in the small size and 75% soft, which is the second softest of the four.

Like most Mr Hankey’s toys, there are 25 colourways to choose from as well as an optional metallic effect. The obvious colourway choice, of course, would be the gunmetal grey that’s used for the sample product displayed on the Mr Hankey’s website. However, I’m rarely one to go for the obvious, so instead I requested my Cyberpunk Dildo in the metallic gold shade. This colour is a little more muted than some of the bright shades I’ve had from Mr Hankey’s in the past, but the shimmery effect is still really pretty.

You can also add on extras such as a Vac-u-Lock hole, if you like.

What I Liked About This Cyberpunk Sex Toy

I’ve commented in the past that at times, even the smallest options from fantasy toy makers can be improbably enormous. The Cyberpunk Dildo in small isn’t anywhere near as eye-watering as some of the other Mr Hankey’s products I’ve tried, making it a slightly more realistic option for my not-particularly-ambitious vagina. Of course, if you do prefer things on the larger side, just size up.

Hr Hankey's yellow/gold cybernetic sex toy

There’s a lot to like about this toy.

  • The wavy design is a little different from the traditional phallic shape. It’s sort of a cross between a tongue and a tentacle, shape-wise.
  • The softness and flexibility makes insertion easy and comfortable. If you choose a firmer texture this may differ, but the nature of this shape means it’s likely to always have at least some flex and squish.
  • The broad, flat underside and widest-in-the-middle design will appeal to people who enjoy girthy toys.
  • The tapered design means it’s easy to gradually insert it as you get warmed up, without needing to go straight for the girthy middle. And, of course, you can just use the tip if you prefer.
  • Speaking of the tip, its slight curve and flexibility makes it ideal for targeting the G-spot.
  • The large and heavy base allows it to stand upright on its own.
  • The large base makes it anal-safe.
  • For me, this is effectively a smooth toy (see below). If you want a decorative fantasy sex toy design without the sensation of heavy texturing, the Cyberpunk Dildo toy gets that right.
  • The shape means this one is surprisingly excellent for external stimulation for those with a vulva. Its shape means it is ideal for grinding against, and the flexible tip can provide a “flicking” kind of clitoral stimulation if you angle it right.

Things to Be Aware Of

Yellow gold cybernetic sex toy from Mr Hankey's

Compared to some textured sex toys, the Mr Hankey’s Cyberpunk Dildo features very light and mostly decorative texturing. The futuristic, abstract patterns across its surface look cool, but I really can’t feel them at all in use. This isn’t a downside to me because I often prefer smoother toys, but it’s something to be aware of. If you prefer heavy texturing, skip this one.

For those who prefer to ride their toys hands-free, it’s possible with this toy but the combination of flexibility and lack of a suction cup base means it’s not as easy as it would be with some other dildos.

In addition, though this toy is anal-safe, I’d recommend choosing a firmer option if you want to use it in this way. The 75% soft is really too flexible to be practical for anal insertion.

Due to the size and density of the silicone, this toy is naturally pretty heavy even in the smaller sizes. The silicone is also a little grabby, so expect to need plenty of lube with this one.

Futuristic Sex Toys: Mr Hankey’s Cyberpunk Dildo Verdict

Hr Hankey's yellow/gold sex toy with cybernetic design

If a cyberpunk sex toy appeals to you, if you’re looking for something a little different, or if you just like the look of the shape, I can totally endorse this one. Mr Hankey’s have done a great job yet again.

Prices for the Cyberpunk Dildo start at $129.95 for the small. Larger sizes and additional customisations add to the price.

Thanks to Mr Hankey’s Toys for sponsoring this Cyberpunk Dildo review! All views are, as always, mine.

Header image featuring a set of demon horns and the words Mr Hankey's Toys ONI Demon Dildo

[Toy Review] Mr Hankey’s Toys “ONI” Demon Dildo

Published on by Amy

I’ve featured a lot of different types of dildos on this blog up to now. Tentacle dildos, dragon dildos, unicorn dildos, and of course, my personal faves: sparkly dildos! A demon dildo, though, is a new one on me. Based on the mythical creature of the same name, today we’re looking at the ONI by Mr Hankey’s Toys.

What is the Mr Hankey’s ONI?

The ONI by Mr Hankey’s Toys is a silicone dildo available in four sizes, ranging from Small (7.1″ insertable length, 1.87″ diameter at the widest point) through Medium, L/XL, up to XXL (12.75″ insertable length, 3.26″ diameter at the widest point.) Since even the smallest of these sizes is by no means “small”, I might be inclined to rename them Large, Extra Large, Fucking Enormous, and Oh My God Are You Actually Kidding?, but that’s just me.

Mr Hankey's Toys ONI demon dildo

The ONI dildo features a demon face, complete with horns, in the centre of the shaft. It is ultra curved and heavily textured along all sides, with ridges, swirls and bumps. It has a thick shaft at the bottom that tapers up to a slimmer head.

Like most Mr Hankey’s toys, it is highly customizable. You can choose from the four sizes I’ve already mentioned, four firmness levels, and 25 colours. You can also add a metallic effect and a Vac-u-Lock hole for a sex machine, if you like.

I received the ONI in size Medium, which measures 10.75″ in total length, 9″ in insertable length, and 2.33″ in diameter at the widest point. I chose metallic green in medium firmness with no Vac-u-Lock hole.

ONI Demon Dildo: What I Liked

I was drawn to the ONI because it’s so different to anything I’ve tried before. I wasn’t really sure if it would work for me. But I had to try it just because I don’t have anything similar in my collection. My experience with textured toys has been mixed.

Mr Hankey's Toys ONI demon dildo

My first observation about the ONI is that it’s not really a toy I can thrust with. The in-and-out motion means that the ridges and bumps along the back irritate my sensitive vaginal walls pretty quickly. This is much more a “put it in and enjoy the sensation” kind of toy. (Which is actually convenient because it’s also heavy as fuck, so I imagine thrusting with it would become pretty tiring pretty quickly!)

Here’s what else I liked about the ONI:

  • It really is very aesthetically pleasing! I don’t have a monster/demon kink, but I love this dildo’s combination of ornate swirls and the beast-like ridges along the back of the shaft. The metallic green shade I chose is gorgeous. I suppose red would have been more traditional, but I like my toys in bright and unexpected colours.
  • The tapered tip makes the size far more manageable than many of the extra large toys I’ve tried. By beginning with a slimmer end that gradually widens, the user’s body can warm up and open up to gradually take more of the toy.
  • That curve tho! The ONI’s curve is so pronounced that you can get amazing G-spot or prostate stimulation from even just using the first two or three inches. Since the chances of me getting this entire toy inside me are slim-to-none, I appreciate that I can enjoy it even so.
  • When I’m in the mood for it, I do enjoy the texture. I chose the medium firmness, which is a good balance between allowing the texture to be fully felt and ensuring it doesn’t become “so intense it’s painful.”
  • Even with the medium-firm density of the silicone, it still has a decent amount of flex and a little squish to it. This, too, aids in comfortable insertion and use.
  • That little lip that sticks out at the base of the shaft could theoretically stimulate the clitoris when the toy is inserted all the way. I can’t actually use it like that because, as I mentioned, there’s no way this entire thing is getting inside me. But you potentially could, if that’s your thing! It’s a cool design feature, anyway.

Bonus pro tip: if you have a clit and you can position the toy suitably to make this work, the texture on both sides of the shaft feels amazing for grinding on. You’re welcome.

Potential Downsides and Things to Consider

Mr Hankey's Toys ONI demon dildo

Like many Mr Hankey’s products, the ONI is… sizeable, to say the least. The combination of the large size and the heavy texturing will mean it won’t work for everyone. If you’re new to textured toys, I recommend getting the smaller size, and if you’re new to extra large toys I suggest starting with a smoother one before you try something like this.

This is a toy that requires a lot of warm-up and a lot of lube. It’s large, it has a lot of texture, and the silicone is pretty matte. This isn’t a “get off quickly and go” type of toy!

Due to the intense curve of this one, it stands up okay on its own but doesn’t balance very well when you apply any kind of pressure or movement. If you’re someone who likes to use your dildos hands-free, this probably isn’t the one for you.

All the ridges and little nooks can make the ONI a bit of a pain to clean. Boiling it is the best way to remove bodily fluids and kill off bacteria between uses.

ONI Demon Dildo: Verdict

Mr Hankey's Toys ONI demon dildo

A gamble of a choice for me, but one that paid off! This toy is unique and different, with a fantastic curve (thank you!) and some interesting texturing. It’s sure to appeal to monster fans, fantasy toy aficionados and serious texture lovers. I can’t honestly say it’s going to enter my regular rotation of toys, as my tastes generally skew towards smaller, smoother, and simpler, but it’ll definitely get some occasional use.

The ONI demon dildo retails starting from $119.95 for the small size. Larger sizes and additional customisations increase the price accordingly.

Thanks to Mr Hankey’s Toys for sending me this product and for sponsoring this review! All views are, as always, mine.

Header image featuring colourful spirals. Text reads "Twister Textured Dildo"

[Toy Review] Twister Glow in the Dark Silicone Textured Dildo

Published on by Amy

A textured dildo is a “love-it-or-hate-it” thing for a lot of people. Some people find that texturing adds a lot of additional stimulation to the sensitive vaginal opening and internal walls. Others find too much texturing uncomfortable or even painful. This week I’m reviewing the “Twister“, a textured and semi-clear silicone dildo from Juliet Toys.

I’m somewhere in the middle of the love-or-hate spectrum on textured toys. Most of the time, when I want to use a dildo I’ll reach for a smooth, curved one like my Godemiche Ambit, Godemiche Morpheus, or Njoy Pure Wand. Intense texturing is often uncomfortable for me, particularly on more rigid toys. But a toy with some gentle texturing, particularly if it’s also made of soft silicone, can occasionally be a winner.

(I’m also aware it’s been a hot minute since I posted anything and that my socials have been pretty inactive, too. I’m in grad school hell and barely having time to do anything else beyond studying and the work that pays my bills. Normal service will resume later this year, but content will be a little more sporadic until then.)

What is the Twister?

The Twister, a translucent textured dildo with flecks of pink, blue and green in the silicone

The Twister is a textured silicone dildo available in three sizes. I received the Medium, which measures 6.9″ in total length (around 6″ insertable) and 1.7″ in diameter in the centre of the shaft. It’s wider towards the bottom of the shaft and tapers to a narrower head. The Small size measures a petite 5.3″ x 1.3″, and the Large measures 8.7″ x 2″, so there’s a good range of sizes to suit all preferences. It has a suction cup base.

“Twister” is kind of a misnomer, since it is actually more of a braided design.

The Twister, a translucent textured dildo with flecks of pink, blue and green in the silicone

This toy is a body-safe translucent/semi-clear silicone dildo, with flecks of pink, blue and green inside. In daylight, the effect is very subtle, but when the lights are low you get a fun “glow in the dark” effect that allows the colours to stand out.

Twister Textured Dildo: What I Liked

First, let’s look at the things I liked about the Twister textured dildo.

  • The level of texturing is a nice medium. It’s enough to be felt and to offer something different to my go-to smoother toys, but it isn’t so intense that I find it uncomfortable (most of the time.) The gentle ridges of the braided design feel especially good on insertion, as they stimulate all the sensitive nerve endings around the vaginal opening.
  • The size of the Twister in medium is just about perfect for my body! Oversized toys have their place, of course, but that place is rarely “in my vagina.”
  • The silicone is squishy, with a middling density – not too firm, but not too soft either.
Close up of the braided shaft of the Twister, a translucent textured dildo with flecks of pink, blue and green in the silicone

  • It’s very flexible, which helps with more comfortable positioning and insertion.
  • As it has a large, round base and is fairly light, this is an ideal dildo for strapping it on if the partner I’m topping wants a more textured dildo than my go-to standards.
  • That large base also makes the Twister anal-safe, if that’s your thing.
  • The suction cup is pretty strong and stays put well when you affix it to a surface.
  • The aesthetic is fun and unusual. A translucent or clear dildo often spells a toxic material, so it’s good to see more silicone options available with this look, and I like the little flecks of colour.

I have mixed feelings on the texturing around the base. On the plus side, it looks pretty. On the negative side, it’s kind of a nightmare to clean. Due to all its ridges, both on the shaft and the base, I’d recommend the boiling method to sterilise this toy.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

For some reason, the Twister dildo had a really strong, chemically “new car” smell when I took it out of the packaging. I flame-tested it and it does appear to be genuine silicone, so I have to assume it’s holding onto a scent from either the plastic packaging or the curing process. It genuinely gave me a headache when it was sitting on my desk. I gave it a very thorough wash before using, and that got rid of some of the smell but not all of it.

My Twister also has some visible imperfections, particularly around the base as well as what looks like a bubble in the silicone part way down the shaft. This doesn’t impact the toy’s performance, but it cheapens the overall effect and may shorten its lifespan.

Close up of an imperfection in the silicone of the Twister dildo

The silicone is very matte. This means that, coupled with the textured design of this dildo, you really need plenty of lubrication with this one.

Finally, I wish it had a bit more of a curve. This is a matter of personal preference rather than a direct criticism of the toy, but the shaft is straighter than I ideally prefer.

Twister Textured Dildo: Verdict

The Twister is a perfectly fine basic textured dildo. It retails $49.90 for the medium size at the time of writing. It does have some imperfections, and the quality of its construction reflects the low price, but I’ll still likely use it again.

Get the Twister here.

Thanks to Juliet Toys for sending me the Twister textured clear dildo and sponsoring this review. All views, as always, are mine.

Curved hook hanging on a black chain to represent the curved dildo in this post. Text reads "Mr Hankey's Toys Captain's Hook"

[Toy Review] Mr Hankey’s Toys Captain’s Hook Curved Dildo

Published on by Amy

I’m really pleased to be back with another Mr Hankey’s Toys review following my mini-series last year. The Mr Hankey’s team recently got back in touch recently and asked me to pick another three toys to review. As soon as I saw it, I couldn’t resist the gloriously curved dildo that is the Captain’s Hook.

Extreme Curved Dildo: Mr Hankey’s Toys Captain’s Hook

Mr Hankey's Toys Captain's Hook, a bright pink curved girthy dildo

The Captain’s Hook by Mr Hankey’s Toys is a realistic silicone dildo with an extreme curve. It is available in four sizes, with the total length ranging from 8.25″ to 12″ in overall length. Its central shaft diameter ranges from 2.06″ to 3.23″. It is also available in four firmness levels ranging from very soft to extra firm.

Having had previous experience with Mr Hankey’s products and their impressive sizes, I chose the smallest size for my Captain’s Hook dildo. This means my toy measures 8.25″ in length, 7″ in insertable length, and 2.06″ in diameter at the centre of the shaft. Whichever way you look at it, the Captain’s Hook is a large dildo even in the smallest size.

I requested my Captain’s Hook in the second softest of the four options. As with all Mr Hankey’s products, you can customize your product with your choice of colour. The Captain’s Hook dildo is advertised in a metallic gunmetal grey, but I like my electric UV pink choice better! (Femmes gonna femme, amirite?)

A curved extra large hot pink dildo

This toy has a large, thick base which allows it to stand up on its own as well as making it theoretically harness-compatible (though, as we’ll see below, this might not work so well in practice.)

What I Liked About the Captain’s Hook

I knew I was going to love this toy as soon as I saw it on the Mr Hankey’s site, and I was right. Curved dildos are amazing for targeting the G-spot, and this is the most extremely curved silicone dildo I’ve ever owned. I’ve also found that they allow me to experiment with larger toys while minimising the risk of hitting my cervix, which is something I find intensely painful.

This dildo’s curve is so intense that I can get plenty of enjoyment from using just the first two or three inches, if I’m not in the mood for full insertion (which the body often isn’t even if the mind is willing.)

Interestingly, th Captain’s Hook is actually listed on the Mr Hankey’s site as a “prostate massager.” I have neither a prostate nor a sufficiently brave butt to attempt anal insertion of this toy, myself, but I’m sure it would feel amazing for folks who are into larger anal toys and target the prostate in the same way as it does the G-spot.

The softness level of this toy is also pretty ideal for me. The 75% soft silicone is a middling density, with a little bit of squish. This enables the toy to be slightly flexible, which is ideal for more comfortable positioning with larger toys. Choose a firmer option if you want something more intense. Or, if you want this toy to be a little gentler, select the softest silicone.

A woman's hand holding an extra large curvy pink dildo

Aside from the level of curve, the Captain’s Hook dildo is realistic in design. It has a pronounced corona (that’s the “rounded border that projects from the base of the glans penis”) and texturing along the shaft to mimic skin and veins. This makes it an ideal toy for those who enjoy a realistic or semi-realistic aesthetic, but prefer the sensation of a curve.

Any Downsides To Be Aware Of?

Due to its size, the Captain’s Hook is a heavy dildo even in its smallest size. This means that, although it is technically harness-compatible, I can’t imagine using it for strap-on sex realistically. The large base enables it to stand upright, but also adds additional weight and bulk.

Mr Hankey’s notes on the product page that for the larger sizes in particular, this toy can be more practical for partnered play due to its size and shape. Due to the shape and lack of a suction cup, it’s unlikely to be suitable for hands-free use.

The surface texture of the silicone is also very matte. I’ve pointed this out before and I think it might just be a feature of the silicone or finishes that Mr Hankey’s uses. This can add to the challenging nature of inserting a toy this large. You should always use tonnes of lube when using an extra large dildo anyway. The grabby feel of this silicone just makes this even more essential.

Captain’s Hook Curved Dildo: Verdict

I love this dildo. My initial impressions were entirely correct here; this design is fucking fabulous. I’ve never tried a silicone dildo this curved before. The closest things I have in my collection are stainless steel or glass, which is of course a completely different sensation.

The Captain’s Hook is a dildo designed with serious targeted internal stimulation in mind, whether you use it vaginally or anally. Its intense curve and girthy shaft up the intensity.

The Captain’s Hook curved dildo retails starting from $125.95 for the smallest size in one of the middle two firmness levels and your choice of colour. Sizing up, choosing extra firm or extra soft, and adding a metallic effect or vac-u-lock hole will all increase the total price.

Thanks to Mr Hankey’s Toys for sponsoring this review. All views and writing are, as always, mine.

[Toy Review] Nothosaur Meo’s Ridge Extra-Long Dildo

Published on by Amy

We seem to be in something of a golden age of fantasy sex toys right now. More and more designers and manufacturers are popping up, and existing retailers are also realising the potential of these types of toys and beginning to stock them. From dragon dildos to Zodiac sex toys to tentacles and much more, if you can think of it then someone has probably made a version of it you can fuck. And for whatever reason, fantasy toys and oversized toys – from ultra-girthy to extra-long dildos – very often seem to go together.

I think Nothosaur are one of the absolute best in the fantasy toys space right now. They offer consistently superb product quality, great customer service, various customization options, and value for money.

This week, Nothosaur are back as a site sponsor once again. They’ve asked me to review their Meo’s Ridge extra-long dragon dildo.

Meo’s Ridge: An Extra-Long Dragon Dildo

The Meo’s Ridge by Nothosaur is a sex toy inspired by a dragon-like creature. Its suction cup base, adorned with spikes, gives way to a long and rippling shaft with rich and beautiful scale-like texturing. It really does make you think of the spines and scales on a mythical creature.

Meo's Ridge extra-long dildo from Nothosaur dragon range

The Meo’s Ridge dragon dildo is available in four sizes from XS to L, and three firmness levels: soft, medium, or hard. You can also add a vac-u-lock base, if you want. Lengths range from 9.4″ up to 17.5″ in total length, and 8.4″ up to 16.3″ in insertable length. Here’s Nothosaur’s useful size chart so you can compare the sizes and figure out which is best for you:

Size chart for Nothosaur Meo's Ridge extra-long dildo

I requested the Small size (the second smallest overall, measuring 12.2″ in overall length and 10.8″ in insertable length) in medium firmness.

All Nothosaur products are made from body-safe silicone.

As with most Nothosaur toys, you can also customize your dildo with your choice of colours. There are set suggested colourways available, or you can pick from a single solid colour, a two-colour fade, a covered colour (different colours for the inside and outside), or a marble effect with two or three colours.

I chose the pastel pink A-07 and pastel turquoise C-06 shades. The way they’ve blended together in the final fade, with a lilac colour in the middle, reminds me of a pastel version of the bisexual pride flag! This wasn’t intentional on my part, but I’m into it.

By the way: if you want the full set, you can also get the Meo’s Scales grinder (which I have and absolutely love) and the Meo’s Claw!

The Meo’s Ridge Extra-Long Dildo: Impressions & In Use

Meo's Ridge extra long dragon dildo

The first thing that struck me about the Meo’s Ridge dragon dildo when it arrived (apart from its size – more on that in a minute) is how pretty it is. The scales and ridges are a work of art. The level of detailing that has gone into it is truly impressive. I love the colourway I chose – I think it’s giving “queer pastel femme but make it a little bit edgy.”

The silicone looks and feels to be high quality. It is very matte, so it can feel quite “grabby” against the skin and this is amplified by the texturing. Just make sure to add plenty of lube to this toy. I recommend the boil-sterilising method of cleaning. All those little ridges and crevices can harbour germs and bacteria if you don’t clean the toy thoroughly.

The tapered design of the Meo’s Ridge is excellent. If you’re new to experimenting with extra-long dildos, trying out “depth training”, or just prefer a slower warm-up, a tapered toy is a great way to enjoy gradual insertion without things feeling too intense too quickly.

Meo's Ridge dragon sex toy dildo tip close up

I also like that the Meo’s Ridge isn’t too girthy. The diameter at the widest insertable point ranges from 1.5″ (XS) up to 2.7″ (L), though this point is right near the base of the toy so many users may never insert it that far. The first bulge, towards the top of the shaft, ranges from 1.1″ up to 2.2″ in diameter. Not everyone enjoys both length and girth; some people prefer longer but slimmer toys, and this is an ideal design for those people.

By the way: the length, softness, and texturing of this toy also make it amazing for grinding on, if that’s something you’re into. There’s never just one way to use a toy and there’s certainly no right or wrong way. This was one additional use I found for the Meo’s Ridge dildo.

Let’s Talk About This Toy’s Size and Softness

The size of this toy is quite something. Despite being only the second of four sizes, the Meo’s Ridge in Small is literally the length of my forearm! I can’t imagine any universe in which I could insert it all or would even want to try. But that’s fine; bodies are different and preferences are different.

You don’t need to insert the entire length of an extra-long dildo like this to enjoy it. If you only ever use the first two or three inches, or even less than that, as long as you’re having fun nothing else matters. Sex toys aren’t supposed to be a challenge unless the challenge turns you on!

Nothosaur Meo's Ridge dragon sex toy, an extra-long bent in half

I was a little surprised by just how floppy and flexible the Meo’s Ridge dildo is. When I stand it up on the suction cup, it completely flops over. The advantage of this is that the softness and flexibility makes it super comfortable to insert. You can bend it virtually any way you like and the silicone has tonnes of give to it. You can also flex the toy once it’s inside you to target your G-spot or any other internal spot you’re looking to stimulate.

The downside is that it can make initial insertion a little tricky. I found that if I don’t get the angle exactly right, the tip of the toy bends away from my body when I apply pressure to insert it.

It has a suction cup, which theoretically makes it hands-free and harness-compatible. In reality, though, the Meo’s Ridge isn’t likely to be a suitable toy for either of those activities due to its length and floppiness. It is anal-safe if that’s your thing. However, even the medium firmness is soft enough that I imagine anal penetration would be tricky for most users.

Meo’s Ridge Dragon Sex Toy Review: Verdict

If you’re looking for a soft extra-long dildo that isn’t also extremely girthy, the Meo’s Ridge is a great choice. Its dragon dildo aesthetic is unique and detailed, and sure to appeal to fantasy toy lovers. I love the textured surface, the tapered design, and the slimline shaft in particular.

One quick pro tip: if you get this toy, I’d really recommend choosing the “hard” firmness level unless you’re intentionally looking for something very soft and floppy.

The Meo’s Ridge retails from $59.99 for the smallest size in a standard colourway. Larger sizes, custom colours, and additional customisations all impact the final price you’ll pay.

Thanks to Nothosaur sex toys for sending me this dragon dildo and sponsoring this review! All views are, as always, mine.

Header for Blush Novelties Avant Lucky glitter dildo review

[Toy Review] Blush Novelties Avant Lucky Glitter Dildo

Published on by Amy

I’m back again with another Blush Novelties Avant range review following my recent post all about the Avant Pride P3 lesbian flag dildo. Today we’re looking at the Avant Lucky, a gorgeous glitter dildo in a pink/purple/blue ombre, which was sent to be by The Pleasure Garden inclusive sex shop. Though this isn’t officially one of Blush’s pride dildos, the Lucky’s colourway matches the bisexual flag.

What is the Blush Novelties Avant Lucky?

Blush Novelties Avant Lucky glitter dildo

The Avant Lucky is part of Blush Novelties’ range of affordable and cute as fuck silicone dildos. It measures 8″ in total length, 6.5″ in insertable length, and 1.5″ in diameter. It has a straight shaft design in a semi-realistic style, a slightly pronounced head, and a suction cup base.

I love this dildo’s shimmering glitter bisexual pride flag colourway.

Are Glitter Dildos Body-Safe?

I knew what I thought my stance on this subject was before writing this review, but I did some additional research to be sure. So are glitter dildos actually body-safe?

The short and (I’m sorry) unsatisfying answers are… “maybe” and “sometimes.”

Glitter dildo in pink blue and purple from Blush Novelties' Avant range

Some glitters (and related materials like mica) are body-safe, others are not. Think about the ones used in reputable sparkly cosmetics, for example, vs. the stuff you buy in craft stores. The problem with glitter sex toys is that, unless the company chooses to disclose it, there’s almost no way to tell what type of glitter they’re using.

Back in 2021, the fabulous sex blogger Felicity at Phallophile Reviews noted some issues with the Avant Lucky; specifically, she was concerned about glitter flakes delaminating (making their way out of the toy) and the possible safety implications of this. Shortly after, Blush responded to apologise for the problem and to let her know that the glitter they use is non-toxic and body-safe. Felicity also discovered that the Avant Lucky is made by mixing the glitter into the silicone, which is a far safer option than the alternative of adding it as a coating at the setting/curing stage.

I know that, with my Avant Lucky, I haven’t had any issues with glitter flakes coming out of the toy so it’s entirely possible Blush were true to their word and fixed the issue. So is this toy truly body-safe? I’m going to say probably though I don’t feel confident enough to say definitely.

I think the risk here is small, if there is any. Personally, I feel comfortable using this toy. But you’re ultimately the only one who can decide your own risk tolerance. If you’re not sure but you still love the toy, you can always pop a condom over it.

What I Like About the Blush Novelties Avant Lucky Glitter Dildo

I have to hand it to Blush: they are knocking it out of the park with their range of body-safe dildos in beautiful colourways at affordable prices. This toy’s silicone feels high quality and soft enough to rival (or beat) many of the far more expensive products I’ve tried. It has a satisfyingly velvety texture that’s a joy to touch, hold, and use.

Avant Lucky glitter silicone suction cup dildo in bi pride colours

The Avant Lucky is made of fairly firm and dense silicone, with minimal “squish.” Its rounded shaft is the same width all the way down, making it ideal for lovers of medium girth toys. The shaft has a little flexibility. It also has some light texturing on the shaft, a little like the veins of a bio-cock, making it a good in-between option for those who enjoy some texture but find heavily textured toys too intense.

The slight protrusion of the head is great for G-spot or prostate stimulation, and the suction cup base makes it anal safe, harness compatible, and easy to use hands-free if that’s your thing.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

My personal preference is for curved dildos rather than straight-up-and-down ones. For that reason, the Blush Avant Lucky isn’t quite a perfect pick for my body. This is, of course, different for every individual so it’s important to be aware of your body’s needs and preferences. I also find straight toys somewhat less ideal for strap-on sex than curved ones due to issues with positioning.

Avant Lucky Verdict: A Glittery Bisexual Dildo at an Affordable Price

Blush Novelties Avant Lucky glitterly bisexual flag dildo

As long as you’re comfortable with using glitter toys, the Blush Novelties Avant Lucky is a solid basic dildo in a medium size at an affordable price. It probably isn’t one I’ll use much on myself, but I’ll keep it on hand to use with lovers who prefer straight toys to curved ones.

The Avant Lucky retails for £36.50.

Thank you to The Pleasure Garden for sending me this product to review. All views, as always, are mine. This post contains affiliate links – clicking through and shopping with them sends me a small commission at no extra cost to you.

Header for clear silicone confetti Blush dildo review

[Toy Review] Blush Novelties Neo Elite Hanky Panky Glow in the Dark Confetti Dildo

Published on by Amy

On my last call with the lovely Francesca, who owns The Pleasure Garden inclusive sex shop, we discussed which strap-on compatible dildos I might want to review in some companion pieces to my Spareparts Joque review.

I asked for the gayest, girliest, sparkliest items the store had in stock. And friends, as the kids say, she understood the assignment. Along with a lesbian pride dildo and a gorgeous sparkly one, I received another Blush dildo: this spectacular clear confetti-filled glow in the dark creation, the Neo Elite Hanky Panky.

What is the Neo Elite Hanky Panky?

Glow in the dark Blush dildo, a clear sex toy with colourful confetti design

The Neo Elite Hanky Panky is a glow in the dark dildo by Blush Novelties. It measures 8″ in total length, around 6.5″ in insertable length, and 1.5″ in diameter at the widest point.

The Neo Elite is made of clear/translucent silicone filled with little confetti-style flecks in pink, purple, blue and green inside. Yes, it’s possible to get body-safe clear sex toys! You don’t need to resort to toxic jelly materials to enjoy this unique aesthetic.

The Best Things About This Blush Dildo

Multicoloured clear silicone Blush dildo pictured with close-up of suction cup

One of my hottest takes as a queer femme is that enjoying pretty things just because they’re pretty is not frivolous, but tremendously important. Beauty is not frivolous. Enjoying things, as a queer person in a world that wants to tear us down and drown us out, fucking matters. Pleasure is political.

And that’s just as true whether we’re talking about eating delicious food in defiance of diet culture or fucking my hot girlfriend with the gayest cock I can find in defiance of societal homophobia.

All this to say: I like this toy because it’s cute, colourful, and playful as fuck.

Blush clear silicone glow in the dark dildo

There are other great things to say about it too, of course. The shape is fabulous, with a medium curve and a prominent head. The silicone is pretty firm and dense, with minimal “squish”, but the shaft is flexible enough to enable comfortable positioning.

I particularly like the pronounced ridge on the underside of the head, which is ideal for both G-spot and prostate stimulation as well as stimulating the sensitive nerve endings around the vaginal/anal opening on insertion and removal. Otherwise, the shaft is smooth, making it a great choice for people who don’t enjoy the sensation of textured toys. It’s also the same width all the way down.

The large suction cup is strong, and also makes the toy anal-safe and harness compatible.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

Silicone clear sex toy with confetti detailing from Blush Novelties

The only thing to be aware of is that this toy’s silicone is very matte. This means it can feel “grabby” and doesn’t glide as smoothly as some softer silicones do, which some users can find uncomfortable. You can overcome this by adding tonnes of water-based lube; just be aware you’ll probably need more lubrication than usual.

Neo Elite Hanky Panky Blush Dildo: Verdict

If you love beautiful, playful aesthetics and don’t mind a more matte texture, this is a fantastic toy. It has a great shape and design, is versatile enough for different kinds of play from solo masturbation to strap on sex to anal, and is a relatively rare example of a clear/translucent toy made from a body-safe material.

The Neo Elite Hanky Panky retails for a very reasonable £38.

Thanks to The Pleasure Garden for sending me this Blush dildo to review. All views, as always, are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post and shopping with them sends me a small commission at no additional cost to you.

Header image for Avant Pride P3 lesbian flag small suction cup dildo

[Toy Review] Avant Pride P3 Beauty Small Suction Cup Dildo

Published on by Amy

Way back in 2018, in the early days of this blog (wow that was a different time!) I reviewed my first Avant Pride toy, the P1 rainbow dildo. I followed this up with reviews of the P4 leather pride butt plug later that year and the P8 bi pride dildo in 2021. This week I received another from the range: the P3, a lovely little lesbian flag dildo.

I still really like the P8, but I’m not so sure I identify as bisexual any more. Since entering my 30s I’ve slid further and further down the Kinsey Scale to… well, not quite a Kinsey 6, because that wouldn’t account for Mr C&K. Maybe a Kinsey 5-and-a-half? Anyway, the terms I most often use to define my sexuality now are sapphic and homoflexible, the latter meaning (to me) “basically a lesbian but with very very occasional exceptions.”

Sexuality is complicated, y’all.

You know what isn’t complicated, though? How damn good this dildo is.

Smooth Segue, Amy! So Tell Us About the Avant Pride P3 Beauty

Avant Pride lesbian pride dildo

The P3 Beauty is another of the Avant Pride range of sex toys from Blush Novelties. It is a small suction cup dildo measuring 5″ in length and 1.1″ in diameter. Its design is fairly realistic, with a pronounced head and subtle vein texturing along the shaft. The dildo’s colours are based on the pink, white and orange stripes of the lesbian pride flag.

The Avant Pride P3 is made of body-safe and easy-clean silicone. It also has a suction cup, making it ideal for hands-free use and strap-on sex.

What I Liked About the Avant Pride P3 Beauty Small Suction Cup Dildo

My favourite thing about this toy, apart from the gorgeous and vibrant pride-inspired colours, is its small size. Large and oversized toys can be fun on occasion, but often when I’m craving penetration what I actually want is something a little smaller. I also like that the girth is more or less the same all the way down.

I very rarely do anal play at the moment but if you’re interested in a dildo for pegging or anal sex, a slimline toy like this one is an ideal place to start.

Avant Pride realistic small suction cup dildo in lesbian pride flag colours

The Avant Pride P3 has some of the softest silicone I’ve felt in a long time. Its texture is so delightfully velvety that I’ve been absentmindedly stroking my hand over it in between typing up this review. It has a medium density with a little squish, plenty of flex, and a very slight curve. In other words, it’s comfortable to use and easy to position in the way that works for your body.

I like that the suction cup is quite wide, relative to the diameter of the toy. This makes it stick down really firmly to any flat surface, and also makes it easy to use with my favourite strap-on harness without it slipping out or coming loose.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

No? This is a genuinely excellent toy and I can’t find a single fault with it. If you prefer larger insertables it might not be big enough to satisfy you, but for many of us a bigger dildo is not necessarily a better dildo.

Verdict

Avant Pride small lesbian flag dildo with suction cup showing

This is such an easy to use dildo! A simple yet effective design, refreshingly petite size, gorgeous queer colourway, and high quality material. It’s also versatile, anal-safe, and harness compatible. What more could you need in a basic dildo for lesbians, sapphics, WLW, and anyone else who connects with this flag? And on top of all that, it retails for just £32.

Thanks to The Pleasure Garden for sending me the Avant Pride P3 to review. All views, as always, are mine! Affiliate links appear in this post.