[Toy Review] Velvet Thruster Sex Machine Review (Frankie Attachment)

I get asked about sex machines all the time, but I rarely get an opportunity to try them out. They’re often ludicrously expensive and manufacturers are, understandably, reticent about sending them out to reviewers as a result. This means that most of my experiences with them have been one-offs at parties or play events. This month, though, I received the Velvet Thruster Sex Machine from Velvet Brands to test and review, and I’m excited to tell you all about it!

Velvet Thruster sex machine with Frankie attachment in mint green

What is a Sex Machine?

In the most expansive definition, a sex machine is any mechanical device designed to simulate sexual activity.

This means that pretty much any motorised sex toy could be considered a sex machine. However, in practice, the term “sex machine” usually describes penetrative toys that have a thrusting mechanism for simulating penis-in-vagina (or penis-in-anus) sex. Another term for these toys is “fucking machines.”

Velvet Thruster Review: Details

The Velvet Thruster is a thrusting, cordless sex machine by Velvet Brands. It allows you to use various, interchangeable heads with one unit. There are currently six penetrative silicone attachments available, plus one penis stroker attachment. Velvet Thrusters are also available in four colours: lilac, mint green, red, and black. You can choose your favourite or mix and match.

I received the Frankie attachment, which is a dildo 10″ in length (7″ insertable, bringing the entire toy to a whopping 12″ in length) and 1.2″ in diameter, with four deep ridges on the shaft just below the head.

Frankie thrusting dildo for Velvet Thruster sex machine

The Velvet Thruster comes with a suction cup, allowing you to affix it to a surface for hands-free use. A charging cable is also included.

Confusingly, the Velvet site describes the toy as “water resistant” but it’s definitely not waterproof enough to submerge it. So don’t use it the bath or shower, or in a wet environment such as a bathroom. You shouldn’t submerge the toy to clean it, either. Use a body-safe sterile wipe instead.

Velvet Thruster Sex Machine & Frankie Attachment Review: What I Liked

Danyell and Alex, the founders of Velvet Brands and designers of the Velvet Thruster, both come from an engineering background. It is unsurprising, then, that their patented toy is thoughtfully designed and built to exacting standards.

Though it’s pretty large compared to your typical dildo or vibrator, the Velvet Thruster is at the smaller end of the sex machine market. So if you want a thrusting product you can theoretically take with you on date nights/to sex clubs/through airport security, you’ve found it.

Velvet Thruster fucking machine

The Velvet Thruster’s exterior is silicone, which is not only body-safe but (appropriately) velvety soft and smooth. The pronounced ridges on the Frankie attachment offer additional internal stimulation. The Velvet Thruster’s silicone is a little grabby, so add plenty of lube.

I only have one attachment so I haven’t tried the mechanism to switch between them, but other reviews suggest it’s pretty quick and easy.

Velvet Thruster Review: What I Liked

The Velvet Thruster can thrust at up to an impressive 136 strokes per minute. If this sounds too intense for you (as it did for me), don’t worry. It has six different speed settings, so you can choose the one that’s right for you. The Velvet Thruster’s 3.2″ of thrust might not be enough for folks who prefer very deep penetration, but for me it was just about perfect as I find anything too deep to be painful. I don’t want to be prodded in the cervix, thanks.

I like the Velvet Thruster’s semi-firm silicone for similar reasons. It’s rigid enough to get a satisfying “fucking” sensation, but not so rigid that it’s uncomfortable in use. The Frankie attachment is pleasingly flexible in its top 3″, allowing for easier positioning and targeting of the spots that work for you.

The included suction cup adds lots of different interesting possibilities. You can mount your Velvet Thruster to all kinds of surfaces (walls, floors, windows… hey, I’m not judging!) and enjoy it hands-free. And the suction cup is seriously strong, so you don’t need to worry about the toy coming unstuck in use.

The Velvet Thruster’s battery life is also frankly incredible, giving you around 8 hours of use on a single full charge. In a world where most rechargeable sex toys offer 1-2 hours, maybe 3 hours if you’re really lucky, 8 is absolutely amazing.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

By far the biggest downside of the Velvet Thruster sex machine is that it’s large and heavy. This can make it tricky to use by yourself, particularly if positioning or holding heavy toys is difficult for you. I suspect the long-reach handle accessory would make solo use much easier. I’m seriously considering investing in one for this reason.

The controls are also slightly annoying. The machine has bidirectional speed controls, which is a big positive. But for some reason you have to press the main on/off button twice to actually switch the toy off. The first press reduces the speed down to the lowest setting, but doesn’t switch it off. This could be problematic if you need to stop quickly, especially because the main on/off button is actually quite fiddly and difficult to press.

The only other thing I don’t like is the noise, which is a sort of high-pitched repetitive whine. To be fair to Velvet, though, I’ve never encountered a thrusting toy that didn’t make basically this same noise. I think it might just be an unfortunate but unavoidable downside of the genre.

Verdict: Worth the Money?

Like any sex machine, the Velvet Thruster is expensive. Prices range from $246-$300 (or £204-£245 on the UK site) for a preconfigured machine, depending on which head you choose. Additional attachments range from £38-£61. You can also customise your toy with various accessories and upgrades, such as handles, if you like.

So is the Velvet Thruster sex machine worth it? I’m going to say yes, overall, it’s an excellent product that is fairly and competitively priced for what it is. I know I’ll get plenty of use out of mine!

You can buy Velvet Thruster products from Velvet Brands.

Thanks to Velvet Brands for sending me the Velvet Thruster and Frankie attachment product to review. All opinions and experiences are, as ever, my own. Affiliate links appear within this post.

[Toy Review] Kiiroo Pearl2+

A few months back, I got the opportunity to review the Kiiroo Pearl3 for Sex Tech Guide. It feels a little strange to have reviewed the newer product before the older one. But the preceding toy in the range, the Kiiroo Pearl2+, is still available and I recently received one to test out for you all.

Kiiroo Pearl2+ Review: Details

The Kiiroo Pearl2+ is a G-spot vibrator that claims to be “the world’s most high-tech G-spot vibrator.” That’s quite the claim! And while I’m as much of a fan of fancy sex tech as anyone, I’m ultimately a woman of quite simple tastes when it comes to what my vulva likes. I want rumbly power, and lots of it.

Kiiroo Pearl2+ app controlled vibrator

The Kiiroo Pearl2+ measures 8″ in length and just over 1.5″ in diameter at the widest point, and weighs in at a pretty light 139g. It is coated in body-safe silicone and fully waterproof. The Pearl2+ is USB rechargeable via the included cable. You’ll get around 90 minutes of battery life for a two hour charge.

Kiiroo Pearl2+ Review: What I Liked

Let’s start with the good. The Kiiroo Pearl2+ does offer genuinely powerful and rumbly vibrations. In a world where sex toy manufacturers are often so focused on gimmicks (nifty app features) that they forget the basics (good motors), it’s good to see that Kiiroo’s designers have not fallen into that trap.

I also really like the Pearl2+’s shape. Its smooth shaft is comfortable to insert, and its gentle curve is ideal for targeting my G-spot. It has a soft silicone exterior and a firm texture, which is great for applying G-spot pressure.

Kiiroo Pearl2+ smart vibrator

Aesthetically, too, I’m a big fan. The Kiiroo Pearl2+ is a lovely turquoise, which happens to be not only an unusual colour for sex toys, but also my favourite colour apart from purple.

Manual, Interactive, Touch-Sensitive: Multiple Ways to Play with the Kiiroo Pearl2+

The Pearl2+ also comes with an impressive array of additional features.

Kiiroo’s FeelConnect app is available free on both Android and iOS, and is quick and easy to download and set up. The toy’s box includes instructions for connecting your toy to the app, which takes under a minute.

You can then sync your toy to interactive online content (such as VR porn), connect with your partner from anywhere in the world (they’ll also need the app for this), or use the “Touch Control” feature to control your toy’s vibrations with the swipe of a finger. If you’re an online performer, you can also sync your toy to your camming platform to allow your fans to tip you in exchange for temporary control of your toy.

The Kiiroo Pearl2+’s long-distance responsiveness from a partner was excellent during my test runs, but the Touch Control function was quite spotty and unreliable. And personally, though I like the idea of a toy that connects to interactive content, most of what’s available is what could broadly be called “mainstream porn”, which I have virtually no interest in (and am often actively turned off by.)

Finally, there’s the Pearl2+’s touch-sensitive functionality. Touch-sensitive plates along the back of the toy respond to any kind of contact from your body, such as the pressure from your vaginal walls when it’s inserted or the touch of a finger. More pressure equals more power, so you can turn the toy’s intensity up and down simply by using one, two, or three fingers. From my perspective at least, this is probably the coolest of all the Pearl2+’s features.

For a toy that comes with this many extras, the Kiiroo Pearl2+’s price of £105 ($109) is extremely competitive.

What I Don’t Like About the Pearl2+

Interestingly, I find the Pearl2+ very comfortable and ergonomic for use as a G-spot toy, but significantly less so when I use it as a clitoral vibrator. Perhaps it’s something to do with the angle, but my hand was really sore after a 20 minute session of clit play with this toy.

Honestly, I’d probably like it more if I was a bigger fan of G-spot vibrations. For a comfortable-to-use and powerful clitoral vibrator, though, I’m unlikely to reach for it regularly.

Kiiroo Pearl2+ app controlled vibrator

Finally, I don’t like the Kiiroo Pearl2+’s controls. It has only one button, which means you have to scroll through all the settings to go back a step if you’re using it on manual mode. Even with just three constant speeds and two patterns, it’s really annoying. In a toy of this price point, there’s really no excuse not to have bidirectional buttons. In addition, if you hit the button again after the final setting, the vibrations switch off entirely. This is immensely frustrating, particularly if you’re close to orgasm.

Verdict

So is the Kiiroo Pearl2+ worth it? Ultimately, that depends on how much use you’re going to get out of its additional high-tech features.

If you’re after a basic vibrator, there are cheaper options on the market that are of at least as high a quality. Not that the Pearl2+ is bad, because – despite its flaws – it’s fairly strong and rumbly. But it’s just unnecessary to pay over £100 for a straightforward G-spot vibrator (especially one that uses a single button interface.)

But if you’re more interested in syncing your vibe with online content, playing long-distance or syncing toys with your partner, or playing around with fun extras such as the touch-sensitivity, you’ll struggle to find another toy with this many excellent features at this price point.

You can buy the Pearl2+ from several of the retailers I love including Babeland and Good Vibes, as well as directly from Kiiroo.

Thanks to Kiiroo for sending me the Pearl2+ product to review. Affiliate links appear in this post. All views and experiences are, as always, my own.

Review: Bestvibe CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo

Happy new year, friends! 2022 was a rough one and I’m not naive enough to say “2023 is going to be my year!” We’re all still facing ongoing challenges due to *gestures vaguely at everything*. Personally, I’ll be satisfied if 2023 reaches the bar of “better than 2022.” With that said, it’s time to dive into my very first review of the new year: the CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo from Bestvibe Toys.

Bestvibe Toys CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo Review

Bestvibe approached me right before the holidays to invite me to review of their products. Since readers ask me about recommendations for both realistic toys and thrusting toys all the time, I thought I’d choose this one, which ticks both of those boxes.

CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo

The CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo is closely resembles a bio-cock. It is impressively detailed, with a veined shaft, textured balls, a pronounced head, and even skin texturing at the base of the head. If you’re looking for a highly detailed realistic toy without breaking the bank, look no further.

The CYRUS measures 9″ from base to tip, of which 7″ is insertable length, and 1.59″ in diameter at the widest point. This makes it a little larger than the average factory-installed penis, but not scarily huge. Due to the internal mechanisms and dense silicone, it weighs in at a hefty 490g. It features a suction cup base, allowing for hands-free play or harness compatibility for strap-on sex.

CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo

The CYRUS is made of body-safe silicone. Since the texture is quite similar to some TPE/TPR toys I’ve handled, I flame tested it to be sure. I’m pleased to say it’s definitely silicone. (The lack of any discernible smell also tipped me off that it’s real silicone.) Manufacturers often sacrifice safety in favour of “real feel” materials when it comes to realistic toys, so it’s great to find safe, non-porous alternatives.

The CYRUS is IPX5 waterproof, meaning it can withstand a sustained, low-pressure spray of water such as that from a home tap. Therefore, you can wash it under the tap, but don’t submerge it in water. It is rechargeable via the included cable and comes with a battery-operated remote control (1 x 27A 12V battery is included.)

The CYRUS retails for a very reasonable $77 and is currently on sale at $66.

Settings and Controls

There are two ways to control the Bestvibe Toys CYRUS: via the button on the base or via the remote control. Using the button, you’ll be able to scroll through 9 different patterns of vibration and their corresponding inbuilt thrusting patterns (there are 3 different thrusting patterns.)

CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo

With the remote, you can enjoy a much finer level of control, pairing any of the 3 thrusting and rotating modes with any of the 9 vibration patterns for a completely customisable experience. You can also use either the vibrations or thrusting separately, if you like.

The button on the base of the toy is a little stiff and requires quite a firm press. The buttons on the remote control, on the other hand, are easy to press. The toy’s responsiveness to the remote is fast and reliable, and the range of the remote is 10 metres.

Bestvibe Toys CYRUS Realistic Dildo Review: In Use

The CYRUS’s realistic design is ideal for users looking for the most lifelike experience possible from a toy. The shaft is rigid most of the way along, though the soft and squishy head (the last inch or so) really makes a positive difference from a comfort and ease of use perspective. The pronounced and ridged head is ideal for G-spotting.

I also really love the dual density feel. This means that the toy has a firm core on the inside, and a softer layer on the outside. Like an erect penis, in other words!

The Bestvibe Toys CYRUS’s thrusting mechanism feels amazing in use. If you have a vulva and enjoy dual stimulation, try using it hands-free (or asking a partner to use it on you) and pairing it with your favourite clitoral vibe. I actually prefer to use the thrusting mode alone, because I’m not the biggest fan of internal vibrations. Though it’s far too large for me to have tried it in this way personally, the CYRUS is also anal-safe if that’s your jam.

One of my favourite features of the CYRUS is its “warming” function. Press the little flame icon on the remote to activate this mode. The toy will warm to 38℃ (just very slightly above human body temperature). This really enhances the experience if you’re looking for a toy that feels as realistic as possible. Instead of cool silicone, you can mimic the natural warmth you’d feel with a partner’s cock.

CYRUS Classic Swing&Heat Thrusting Realistic Dildo

The Bestvibe Toys CYRUS’s silicone is quite “grabby” due to its matte texture. Therefore, I’d really recommend using plenty of lubricant for a comfortable experience. Any water-based lube will work. It will also pick up dust and lint in storage, so give it a quick wipe before each use.

The vibrations aren’t massively strong and are a little buzzy. However, they are concentrated in the head of the toy. If you like really powerful G-spot vibrations, this one might not be for you. But if you’re happy with gentler vibes (or mainly here for the thrusting function, as I was) this shouldn’t be too much of a problem.

Volume-wise, the vibrations are very quiet. The thrusting mode isn’t exactly loud, but it does have a very distinctive sound that I can best describe as a repetitive, high-pitched whir. The suction cup is strong and stays in place well on every surface I’ve tried it on.

Bestvibe Toys CYRUS Review: Verdict

I like this one! If I’m honest, realistic dildos aren’t often my thing, aesthetically speaking. I tend to prefer more abstract, colourful (and occasionally glittery) designs. But functionally, it does the job and comes with some great extra features. If I was going to recommend one body-safe, realistic toy at a very realistic price, it might be this one.

Thanks to Bestvibe Toys for sending me the CYRUS realistic dildo to review. All views are, as always, my own. This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write an honest review.

[Toy Review] Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator

Rose sex toys seem to be all the rage at the moment, possibly largely thanks to one such product going viral on TikTok in early 2021. Since then, many different variations on the theme have come out from various companies, some of which I’ve tested in the past. This week, I received another of these toys to try out and review: the Seductive Rose Vibrator from Lovegasm.

Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator Review: Details

The Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator is not actually a vibrator in the strictest sense of the word. It’s a clitoral “suction” toy, meaning that it has an open nozzle and delivers stimuation to the clitoris via pulses of air. This petite toy measures just 2.6″ from base to top, and 2.3″ in diameter at the widest point. The nozzle is 0.5″ in diameter. It’s light and easy to hold, coming in at a petite 124g.

The charging time is around 75 minutes, and you’ll get 75-90 minutes use out of a full charge. The Seductive Rose Vibrator has a waterproof rating of IPX4, meaning it is splashproof but you should not submerge it in water.

seductive rose vibrator from Lovegasm

In the box you’ll also find a magnetic USB charging stand, an instruction leaflet, and a drawstring storage bag,

The Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator is coated in soft and body-safe silicone. Confusingly, the box it came in claims the material is “silica gel”, which is a different thing entirely. I flame-tested the toy and the results indicate real silicone, which is what I already suspected from the look and feel of the material, so you can use it with confidence.

If you like pretty toys, you’ll love this one. The toy is a lovely deep red and the silicone is fashioned into delicate rose petals at the top.

Settings and Controls

The Lovegasm Seductive Rose offers 3 constant speeds and 7 patterns. You control these through a single button interface located just below the centre of the toy’s main body. The button is easy to press and responsive. It also lights up, making it easy to see if you’re playing in low light.

seductive rose vibrator from Lovegasm

I would have preferred both-ways controls to switch between settings. However, I can forgive that oversight in a toy at this price-point.

Does the Lovegasm Seductive Rose Feel Like Cunnilingus?

No.

These types of suction-based sex toys are often marketed as oral sex simulators. While I sort of understand where the thinking behind this is coming from, it’s just not really accurate. Cunnilingus is a very, very difficult think to effectively mimic with a sex toy. Despite valiant efforts, I’m not sure any toy manufacturer has succeeded yet.

seductive rose vibrator from Lovegasm

So does the Seductive Rose Vibrator feel like receiving cunnilingus? No. That doesn’t mean it’s not a good toy, but it means I cannot get behind the claim that the Seductive Rose Vibrator will “satisfy your craving for oral action.” I’ve used enough pressure wave toys at this point that I don’t go in expecting them to feel like cunnilingus. A beginner to this type of toy might not know that, though, and I don’t think this kind of marketing is helpful.

Lovegasm Seductive Rose Review: In Use

With the above said, I actually think the Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator is a great toy! The motor is strong enough to get the job done, and the range of settings allows you to explore with different sensations. I also like that the smaller nozzle allows for intensely focused and targeted clitoral stimulation. This is such an easy toy to use – I pretty much just switch it to my favourite setting, put it in place, and hold it there until I come. Bliss!

seductive rose vibrator from Lovegasm

Here’s a little pro tip for you: if a toy like this one is too intense when you place it directly over your clit, try positioning it over the hood instead. You’ll still get all that focused sensation, but with a little less intensity.

The Lovegasm Seductive Rose Vibrator isn’t too loud, coming in at around 60 dB at its loudest. If it’s switched on and the door is closed, it cannot be heard in the next room.

Thanks to its light weight, the Seductive Rose is easy to angle and position. It is comfortable to hold in place even for an extended session. It’s worth bearing in mind that the nozzle is on the smaller side. Genitals, like all body parts, come in different shapes and sizes and this toy might not be a good fit if you have a larger glans clitoris (that’s the external bit.)

Verdict

The Lovegasm Seductive Rose retails for just £29.83, making it an excellent budget-friendly sex toy. With body-safe materials, a decent motor, multiple settings to choose from, and an attractive design, it’s got everything you need in a basic clitoral toy at an affordable price-point.

This review was sponsored by Lovegasm, meaning I was paid to test the toy and give my honest opinion. All views are, as always, my own. Don’t forget to check out Lovegasm’s full catalogue of products!

[Toy Review] PinkPunch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator

I’ve reviewed many different styles of sex toys at this stage. There’s the classic vibrators and dildos, of course. But I’ve also tested toys shaped like penguins, whales, birds, roses, ice creams, and more. Until Pink Punch (pinkpunch.com) sent me this toy this week, though, I have never tested a vibrator shaped like a mushroom!

Pink Punch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator: Details

PinkPunch sunset mushroom vibrator

Pink Punch got in touch and asked me to test their brand new Sunset Mushroom vibrator, which is the result of multiple years of development and a significant financial investment. I was only too happy to agree!

The Sunset Mushroom is a miniature app-controlled vibrator made of silky smooth and body-safe matte silicone. It measures just under 4″ in total length and looks like a little pink mushroom with cream and orange detailing. The design is really cute and eyecatching. I particularly like the detailing on the mushroom head and the translucent top layer of silicone gives it a softened, otherworldly aesthetic.

The Sunset Mushroom Vibrator comes with its own wireless charging case (think the sort of thing that you charge Airpods in!) This means you don’t need to plug the toy into the wall to charge it. As long as the case is charged, the toy will charge up automatically when you pop it into the case. The little heart light will flash to indicate that the toy is charging. This design makes the toy ideal for travel. A full charge takes 30 minutes and you’ll get an hour of runtime (charging the case takes around 2 hours.) The Sunset Mushroom is also fully waterproof, though its charging case is not.

PinkPunch sunset mushroom vibrator case

My Sunset Mushroom Vibrator arrived in discreet, nondescript packaging. Inside, the toy is attractively boxed in cute branded packaging and fastened with a PinkPunch branded ribbon. Inside the box you’ll find the toy, its charging capsule, a micro USB cable to plug it in, a detachable pull loop with you can optionally clip onto the toy, and a little PinkPunch pin badge. You’ll also find an envelope containing an instruction leaflet and some PinkPunch stickers. It’s clear that real thought has gone into the presentation here, making this toy lovely for gifting or just as a treat for yourself.

PinkPunch sunset mushroom vibrator in its case

The Sunset Mushroom Vibrator retails for $99 (just over £80), which is at the lower end of the price range for an app-controlled toy. But how did it fare in use?

Pink Punch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator In Use: Manual

Despite its small size, the Pink Punch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator packs, well, a punch when it comes to features and functionality.

The motor is sensibly located in the head of the mushroom for best vibration transferrence. This isn’t quite as powerful as I would ideally like and it’s a little buzzy. The handle also vibrates a little during use, so be aware of this if that’s likely to be a problem for you.

The single-button interface is sensibly located on the base of the toy and is easy to press to cycle through the inbuilt three constant vibration speeds and four patterns.

PinkPunch sunset mushroom vibrator

Here’s a really cool thing about this toy: at first glance it looks like it’s primarily a clitoral vibrator (essentially it’s a mini wand!) but, thanks to the included detachable pull-loop to aid with easy removal, you can also use it as an internal vibrator. It’s small enough that it can even function as a leave-in if you like, stimulating you as you go about your day.

One of my favourite aspects of the Pink Punch Sunset Mushroom Vibrator’s design is the rigid neck. This means that you can get a good amount of pressure without it flexing away from your body. The curved shape and large, rigid head is amazing for targeted G-spot stimulation. I also really love the texturing on the tip of the head for clitoral play which, when coupled with a little water-based lube, adds a lovely additional sensation.

PinkPunch sunset mushroom vibrator

Personally, and perhaps surprisingly, I like this one best as an internal toy. The vibrations weren’t quite enough for me to orgasm clitorally, which tends to require very high powered and rumbly vibes. But I prefer gentler toys for internal use. The lower level vibrations combined with the fantastic shape and bulbed mushroom head made it the ideal long-term wear G-spot toy for me.

Unlike so many toys that make this claim, the Sunset Mushroom Vibrator actually is impressively quiet. It’s unlikely anyone in the next room will hear it unless you have paper-thin walls.

Sunset Mushroom Vibrator In Use: App Functionality

The Sunset Mushroom Vibrator functions just fine by itself, but really comes into its own when coupled with the Pink Punch app, which is available for free on both Android and iOS. Once you’ve downloaded the app, you’ll need to set up an account using your email address. It’ll ask you for your date of birth (I’m not really sure why? A licensing requirement for an 18+ product maybe?) and your gender (there are, sadly, only “male” and “female” options.)

Once you’re in, you need to connect your toy by following the instructions on the leaflet. This took less than a minute and connected the first time with no issues. At this point, the app gives you an array of options.

To start controlling your toy from your phone, click “start”. You can then scroll through the four different pattern options and change the speed with a swipe of your finger. The “Lottery” option is fun, cycling through patterns at random in ten-second increments.

You can give control to your partner using the “remote control” option. They will need to have the app downloaded on their phone. Then you simply give them a unique code which will allow them to control your toy until you end the session. This has good potential for people in long-distance relationships, as well as for cam performers.

The app has a fun and colourful aesthetic that reminds me a little of a retro video game. There’s even a section where you can see your use stats and get reward badges for using different functions. So that’s fun if, like me, you are eternally motivated by little hits of digital dopamine.

Pink Punch Mushroom Review: Verdict

I really like this one! Even though I wasn’t blown away by the strength of the vibrations and am unlikely to use it again as a clitoral toy, it’s a surprisingly excellent insertable. The design is cute, the shape is excellent, and the app functionalities and portable charging case really elevate it.

You can get 30% off your order at PinkPunch dot com with my exclusive discount code, Amy30.

This review was sponsored by the good folks at PinkPunch, meaning I was paid to test the product and write a fair and honest review. All opinions and experiences are, as always, my own.

[Toy Review] Womanizer Marilyn Monroe™ Clitoral Stimulator

I’m really not sure how I feel about Womanizer naming a sex toy after Marilyn Monroe. Some believe it’s a fitting tribute and celebration of Monroe as a symbol of empowerment. Others believe it is deeply problematic to use the name of a woman who was sexually abused and continually sexually objectified during her life in this way.

It’s also worth noting that Monroe clearly cannot consent to this use of her name and likeness. Choosing a living celebrity capable of giving consent (such as Womanizer’s previous collaboration with Lily Allen) would have made this whole thing far more comfortable. As it is, I’m left feeling kinda “ick” about it, to be honest.

With that said, what’s it like as a toy?

Womanizer Marilyn Monroe: Details

The Womanizer Marilyn Monroe is actually simply a limited edition redesign of the Womanizer Classic 2. The Classic is Womanizer’s mid-range toy. It offers a more luxurious product than the entry-level Starlet and Liberty products at a more affordable price-point (albeit with fewer fancy bonus features) than the Premium. It utilises Womanizer’s signature Pleasure Air technology, surrounding your clitoris with the nozzle and then stimulating it via rapid pulses of air.

The Womanizer Marilyn Monroe edition is available in four new colourways. There’s marbled white (which I received), marbled black, mint green, and bright red. It’s a very pretty toy. The marbling effect is striking and unusual.

Womanizer Marilyn Monroe™

The toy arrived beautifully packaged in one of Womanizer’s signature boxes. I always think these look like the packaging for high-end perfume. Along with the toy, in the box you’ll find a spare nozzle, a storage bag, instruction leaflets, and a magnetic charging cable.

The Womanizer Marilyn Monroe body is made of soft-touch plastic, and the removable nozzle is made of body-safe and easy-clean silicone. The toy is fully waterproof. It also comes with a five-year warranty, should anything go wrong.

Womanizer Marilyn Monroe™

You’ll get a decent 180 minutes (3 hours) runtime from a single charge. Let’s take a second to talk about THIS bit of marketing copy, though:

180 minutes run time and only a few minutes necessary for you to orgasm? You can calculate for yourself how many orgasms this means.

No. Just no. SOME people will orgasm in minutes with this toy. Others will take much longer, and some won’t get there at all. This is all normal. I’m absolutely sick of toy marketing that will make people think there’s something wrong with them if the product doesn’t work for them in the prescribed specific way.

Orgasms are not a mathematical equation. No toy, no matter how brilliant, is an orgasm guarantee.

In Use

The Womanizer Marilyn Monroe has three control buttons: an on/off switch, and +/- speed controls. It offers a total of 10 speeds. You can scroll through the speeds easily using the respective buttons, which are intuitively located on the back of the toy. The buttons are easy to press, though I would have liked them to be a little larger.

Womanizer Marilyn Monroe™

As far as orgasm potential goes, the Womanizer Marilyn Monroe gets the job done. The shape is excellent, making it easy to get a good seal around your clit, and the tapered handle is comfortable and ergonomic. The air pulses perhaps aren’t as smooth as they could be, creating a “juddering” sensation at the higher speeds.

The biggest downside of the Womanizer Marilyn Monroe is that it is LOUD. The first few speeds aren’t too bad. As soon as you turn it up past about level 4, though, it’s loud enough to be both indiscreet and highly distracting. Unlike some air suction toys I’ve tried, this one seems to get even louder rather than quieter when it’s against the body. The best way I can describe the sound is that it’s a kind of rattling. As someone who is sensitive to noise (and particularly to repetitive, persistent sounds) this is a really significant negative.

Verdict

The Womanizer Marilyn Monroe is decent, though not spectacular, as long as you can cope with how noisy it is. It’s pretty, for sure, but I’m not convinced that’s enough to make it worth the hefty price-tag. Coupled with the uncomfortable branding, this one is more miss than hit for me.

If you can afford it, I recommend going for the Premium. If you’re looking for a slightly more budget-friendly option, the Pro40 is excellent.

The Womanizer Marilyn Monroe retails for £109/$119 and is available from Shevibe.

Thanks to Womanizer for sending me this product to review. All views are my own, as always, and affiliate links appear within this post.

[Toy Review] Womanizer Starlet 3

If you’ve been around for a while, you might remember my reviews of the Womanizer Starlet and Womanizer Starlet 2 rechargeable clitoral stimulators. I was impressed with the original Starlet, a teeny-tiny, no-frills version of Womanizer’s classic clitoral suction stimulators, and significantly less enamoured with the Starlet 2. The latest iteration in this range, the Womanizer Starlet 3, has just hit the market and it’s time for a review.

Womanizer Starlet 3 Rechargeable Clitoral Stimulator: Details

Womanizer Starlet 3 clitoral suction stimulator

The Womanizer Starlet 3 is very similar in design to the Starlet 2. I can’t take a picture of them side by side because I passed on my Starlet 2 to a friend, but as far as I can tell they’re the same size (5″ total length) and the same shape. The Starlet 3 has the same ABS plastic body and removeable silicone nozzle, and is similarly lightweight and compact.

So what’s the difference?

As far as I can tell, the biggest difference is that the Womanizer Starlet 3 has 6 speed settings. The Starlet Original and Starlet 2 each have only 4.

Womanizer Starlet clit sucking toy

The Starlet 3 comes in a couple of new colourways, including the beautiful teal green I received. I specifically requested this because I love green and it’s an unusual shade for sex toys, so I jump on it when I see it. You can also get the Starlet 3 in blue, grey, or pink.

The Starlet 3 also arrived in revamped, sustainable cardboard packaging. Manufacturers who are still using tonnes of single-use plastic, take note.

Womanizer Starlet 3 recyclable sustainable packaging

The Womanizer Starlet 3 is waterproof and USB rechargeable via the included cable. You can clean the body of the toy with a sterile wipe or warm soapy water. You can also remove the nozzle to sterilise it in boiling water (or the dishwasher.)

Starlet 3 in Use

Since it’s the same basic shape as the Starlet 2, many of the issues I had with that product carry over to this one. Specifically, the handle is short and the nozzle only sticks out from the toy’s body about half an inch. I find this makes it incredibly difficult to get and maintain a good angle for both maximum stimulation and comfort. This is probably an issue of personal preference rather than a fundamental flaw with the product, but if it’s a problem for me it’s sure to be a problem for at least some other users. Some of Lovehoney’s on-site reviewers have noted this issue, too.

The nozzle opening is also very small, only about half an inch across at the widest point. That means it’s probably only going to work for someone with a fairly small clit. (Yes, like all other body parts, they vary in shape and size).

The Starlet 3’s controls are fine, wth +/- buttons (which are also the on/off buttons) situated on the back of the main body of the toy. The buttons are a little stiff and require quite a firm press.

Womanizer Starlet 3 buttons

My biggest issue with the Starlet 3 is its battery life. The advertised runtime of 30 minutes on a full charge is already pretty poor. It takes many people longer than that to reach orgasm! But I found that the Starlet 3’s motor became juddery and unreliable after only about 20 minutes. If I pressed it too firmly against my body, or moved too suddenly, it would suddenly reduce in intensity or cut out completely.

Utimately, the Womanizer Starlet 3 fails the “does it get me off?” test. It didn’t on any of the three occasions I tried it. The level of power isn’t bad, especially on the higher settings. I also have no complaints about the suction sensation itself. It probably could have brought me to orgasm using the top couple of speeds, if only the shape weren’t so annoying and it hadn’t died mid-session!

Interestingly, the product copy specifically states that this toy can be used for edging (getting close to orgasm then backing off.) Edging is something I and many other people enjoy. And while this claim is true, it’s… also sort of true for any sex toy that is capable of bringing the user to orgasm? I’m not really sure why it’s specified for this one in particular. Plus, getting edged non-consensually because the damn battery ran out isn’t my idea of a good time.

Womanizer Starlet 3 Review: Verdict

I really wanted to like this one. I appreciate that Womanizer have tried to offer a more budget-friendly option in their range of notoriously high-priced toys. Not to mention it’s just so pretty!

But… ugh.

For a toy that retails for £69.99 ($79.99 US), the Womanizer Starlet 3 was highly disappointing and I cannot recommend it. While the issues I had with the shape are arguably a matter of preference, there’s no excuse for the terrible battery life and unreliable motor. If you’re on a budget, the Romp Switch is a better (and cheaper!) alternative. If you can afford to spend a bit more, you can’t go wrong with the Womanizer/Lovehoney Pro40.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the Womanizer Starlet 3 to review. All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Hot Octopuss PleX with Flex

Do you all remember the Kurve vibrator from Hot Octopuss? I raved about the Kurve because of its dual “treble and bass” motors, which allow the user to customise not just the intensity level of the vibrations, but also where they fall on the buzz-rumble scale. Well, a new Hot Octopuss toy has arrived, and it uses the same tech. But this time, it’s for your butt. Meet the Hot Octopuss PleX with Flex.

What is The Hot Octopuss PleX with Flex?

The PleX with Flex is a vibrating butt plug by Hot Octopuss. It measures 5.5″ in total length, of which around 5″ are insertable, and 1.7″ in diameter at the widest point. The plug sits on a wide base. As the name suggests, it’s ultra flexible, bending up to 90 degrees in any direction.

My PleX with Flex arrived packaged in Hot Octopuss’s signature, sleek black packaging with a picture of the toy on the front. In the box you’ll find your plug, a little square remote control, a branded storage pouch, a charging cable, and an instruction leaflet. I do appreciate that Hot Octopuss always include a storage bag with their toys. It’s such a small thing but it really does help a more expensive product feel like value for money.

PleX with Flex vibrating butt plug in its box

The PleX with Flex is made of smooth and body-safe matte black silicone. It is also fully waterproof, though the remote control is not. It’s rechargeable via the included USB cable.

Hot Octopuss Plex with Flex Review: What I Liked

By far my favourite thing about the PleX with Flex is its shape. The smooth, tapered shape makes insertion comfortable, and the ultra flexible nature of it means you can position the toy exactly how you want. I don’t have a prostate but for people who do, I’m informed that the curved shape of the PleX with Flex makes it ideal for targeted prostate pleasure.

PleX with Flex black silicone butt plug from Hot Octopuss

The PleX with Flex’s motors are also fantastic. It houses a rumbly (“bass”) motor towards the bottom of the shaft, and a buzzy (“treble”) motor towards the tip. With independent controls (we’ll talk more about the and five available pattern settings for each motor, you can create an enormous range of different experiences and sensations. Best of all, each motor is powerful. I’m not a big fan of buzz, so I eventually found that the sweet spot for me was to have the buzzy motor on low and the rumbly motor on a higher setting.

PleX with Flex vibrating prostate massager

The large base, which essentially functions as a handle, also makes it possible to thrust with this toy, if you want to. That’s unusual in a butt plug style toy. For that reason, I’d recommend this one if you’re working up to anal penetration with a penis or a larger dildo.

The PleX with Flex also isn’t too loud relative to its vibration strength. Even outside the body it’s pretty quiet, and when it’s inserted the sound is muffled still further. You might not want to use it out in public, but there’s no way you’ll wake the neighbours!

The PleX with Flex is also easy to keep clean. I recommend using a body-safe sterilising wipe then wash it thoroughly in warm water and gentle soap.

Anything I Didn’t Love?

The PleX with Flex is fundamentally a well designed toy. Its shape is dreamy and its motors are excellent. With that said, there are a few things I think could be improved.

My biggest complaint lies in the buttons and controls. Placing the controls on the bottom of the toy’s base is an odd choice for this one. This makes it impossible to see the buttons when the toy is inserted. So you have to either rely on touch alone (possible but not ideal), ask your partner to change the setting for you if you’re using the toy together, or take it out to change the setting and then reinsert. None of which is ideal.

PleX with Flex silicone prostate massager buttons

I could forgive this if the remote control was brilliantly designed, but it’s… not. Hot Octopuss’s remote controls are inexplicably tiny. I think they’re going for discretion but, unless you’re going to use the toy in public (which, as I’ve said, I don’t recommend) I’d rather have a slightly bigger control that’s easier to use. Being so small, it’s difficult to hold and easy to lose. I much, much prefer the wrist strap design offered with toys like the Pulse Solo Lux.

Remote for remote control vibrating butt plug PleX with Flex

The battery life is also a bit of an issue. It lasts about an hour on a full charge. But with a charging time of 4 hours, I would have liked its run time to be a little longer.

From a personal experience perspective, another downside is that the PleX with Flex is slightly too big. It took me a long-ass (ha) time to write up this review, partly because my butt is rarely up for taking something of this size. This is less an objective criticism, admittedly, than a personal preference. I’d really love to see them release a mini version alongside this one, for those of us who prefer a smaller anal toy. So if any Hot Octopuss designers are reading…

The PleX with Flex isn’t really a leave-in toy. Given the size of the base and the location of the buttons, sitting or walking around all day with it in isn’t really possible. This isn’t really a downside as such, just something to be aware of. This is a toy

PleX with Flex Review: Verdict

It’s a mixed bag for me with this one. Ultimately, the PleX with Flex is a toy that meets specific needs well. If you’re looking for a butt toy with strong motors and an ability to experiment with buzz/rumble as well as power level and patterns, this is the one for you. I also recommend it if you’re looking for a vibrating anal toy you can thrust with. On the other hand, if you’re looking for something more akin to an “insert and leave in” anal toy, this is not it.

While its body-safe materials, well-designed shape, and powerful motors work in its favour, there are notable downsides that make it hard to give an unqualified YES to this one.

The PleX with Flex retails for $99.99/£89.95 and is available from Good Vibes and Babeland.

Thanks to Hot Octopuss, who sent me the product in exchange for an honest review. All views are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Review] Godemiche Grind Rings

Back in the day, Godemiche’s Twitter bio said that their goal was “not to break the mold, but recolour it.” Their Ambit is a simple yet near-perfect dildo, and they offer an array of body-safe dildos, plugs, strokers, gags and more in a dizzying array of colours and combinations. But despite this stated aim, the Godemiche Grind Ring really does break a few molds.

In a world of endless knock-offs and derivatives, it is so refreshing when I see sex toy designers doing something genuinely new and innovative. And I have never come across anything quite like the Grind Ring before. But what is a Grind Ring, how does it work, and—most importantly—is it good?

What is a Grind Ring?

A Grind Ring is a piece of silicone shaped a bit like a pizza slice, with a hole designed to fit around the penis or dildo during penetrative sex. Its main purpose is to provide extra external stimulation to a person with a clitoris. Each of these innovative clit grinders has a raised mound covered in one of nine textures.

Each Grind Ring measures 6″ in length and 4.3″ across at the widest point, and feature a stretchy hole for a penis or dildo to fit through at the base.

In Godemiche’s words:

The Grind Ring is a soft textured piece of body safe silicone that’s shaped like a pizza slice with a bulge for grinding. Dare we say it, it’s also more enjoyable then a pizza slice too and way fucking dirtier.

This review covers the original “low grind” Grind Ring in its nine available textures as well as one of the “high grind” variations. There are also Dual Density and Dual Texture Grind Rings available.

So How Does it Work?

Most people with vulvas need sustained clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, which penis-in-vagina intercourse doesn’t always provide. The main purpose of a Grind Ring, as I mentioned above, is to provide that clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex. So, naturally, Mr C&K and I began by testing it that way.

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone sex toy in Bubbles and Waves
Feat. “Bumps” in Aquamarine and “Waves” in Pastel Pearlescent Green

After trying a few different positions, we concluded that by far the most effective way to use this toy was with me on top. This allowed me to effectively grind down against the textured surface. However, any position that involves a lot of close, face-to-face bodily contact works pretty well. Positions with more space between bodies tend to make the Grind Ring flap around and slip out of position.

While using a Grind Ring did not get me to orgasm during penetrative sex (the stimulation was a little too inconsistent for that), it did up the intensity and add a lot of additional pleasure.

Other Ways to Use These Toys

The fun thing about sex toys is that you don’t have to just use them in the way they were originally designed to be used. Wand vibrators on penises or clitoral suckers on nipples, anyone?

The Grind Ring (or any pussy grinder, for that matter) is no different.

Girl on the Net posted a brilliant piece about using it “wrong” (there’s obviously no such thing!) and I was inspired to try her “textured Doxy wank” idea[1].

You might also want to try:

  • Using the Grind Ring as an addition to hand sex, either on yourself or your partner
  • Placing the Grind Ring underneath you on a chair or other firm surface
  • Lying on top of the Grind Ring on your bed
  • Experimenting with positions using pillows, positioning wedges, or toy mounts
  • Putting a little clitoral balm or stimulating lube on your Grind Ring before you start

[1] Since I initially wrote this review, Godemiche have added textured Doxy and Magic Wand attachment heads to their line-up!

Let’s dive into the review of the various Grind Ring textures.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Waves”

Godemiche Waves Grind Ring clitoral sex toy

I received the Waves Grind Ring in gorgeous pastel pearlescent green.

This Grind Ring was perhaps the biggest surprise of the range. After feeling how soft its silicone ripples are, I wasn’t sure how much I’d be able to feel them. But when I ground against them, especially when they had a firm surface underneath, they felt like a series of repeated licks from dozens of little silicone tongues. Since the waves are so close together and flex as you rub against them, it offers a smooth, flowing, continuous sensation.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Bumps”

Godemiche Bumps Grind Ring sex toy for clit

I received this one in Aquamarine, a deep sea-green shade.

The Bumps Grind Ring is the perfect middle ground in terms of intensity compared to others in the range. The little nodules are small and quite close together so whichever way I move against them, several of them are always making contact with my clit from various angles. This one works best for long, slow, back-and-forth movements.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Bubbles”

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone clitoral stimulator in Bubbles

I received the Bubbles Grind Ring in a shade of watery blue known as “Reefs Water.”

This was actually the first Grind Ring Mr C&K and I tried as an addition to penetrative sex. I had a feeling this one would be gentle, which it was and it wasn’t. This one is ultra smooth and offers a squishy “bounce” when you move against it. Rather than the licking sensation of the Waves or the flicky back-and-forth of the Pills and Spikes, the main sensation of the Bubbles is one of pressure.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Spikes”

Godemiche Grind Ring clitoral stimulator in Spikes

I received the Spikes Grind Ring in a vibrant shade of orange known as “Dragon’s Breath.”

My first thought when I saw this texture was “eek”. The Spikes Grind Ring looked like it might be too intense for my sensitive clit. As it turns out, that’s the case sometimes but not always. I have to be in a specific mood for the Spikes Grind Ring, and that mood is “craving something so intense it’s almost too much”. It’s not painful, as the silicone is indeed very soft and squishy. It’s just… a lot.

The Spikes Grind Ring creates a teasing, unpredictable flicking sensation. One amazing thing I discovered about this one: if I lay it across my vulva and use a powerful vibrator over the top of it, the tips of the spikes transmit the vibrations in very interesting ways.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Hearts”

Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring, Valentine's Day sex toy

I knew I wanted my Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring in a Valentine’s-themed colour, so I opted for this shimmery pinkish-red known as “Ruby Rose.”

The Hearts Grind Ring feels somewhat similar to the Bubbles. It offers a similar kind of deep pressure when you grind against it, but the larger and flatter surface of the hearts makes it feel a little less bouncy. Due to the shape of the hearts, I find that this texture is more intense on the downward motion than on the upward motion.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Pyramids”

Pyramid Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings from Godemiche
“Pyramids” (left) and “Tall Pyramids” (right)

I received the Pyramids Grind Ring in a green and burgundy/purple swirl colourway called “Garden Party.”

Adam from Godemiche says that the Pyramids Grind Ring texture was “inspired by a belt I happened to see someone wearing while out grocery shopping. It reminded me of my skater boy days when none of my trousers fit and I often opted for a studded belt to keep them around my thighs.” If you can’t picture what he means, think something like this.

I expected the Pyramids to feel a lot like the Spikes, but they don’t. They’re less flexible and, though they’re still soft, they have a firmer texture. The overall sensation is more targeted, deeper, and less “flicky.”

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Tall Pyramids”

Godemiche Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings
“Tall Pyramids” (right) and “Spikes” (left)

I received the Tall Pyramid Spikes in a reddish-purple shade called “Winter Berry.”

As you can see in the above picture, these tall pyramid spikes are noticeably smaller than those on the Spikes ring. So though that’s probably the closet comparison in terms of sensation, they’re really quite different.

The Tall Pyramids are very soft and very flexible, and they really don’t feel “pointy” at all. You can get a range of sensations from this one: if I grind down hard against it, I get an all-over rubbing sensation, whereas if I support some of my weight and just glide my vulva along it, it’s more of a gentle tickle.

I think I like this texture best because you get constant stimulation as the spikes slide along your vulva. The flicking of the little pyramids feel like dozens of little silicone tongues lapping at and around my clit.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Pills”

Godemiche Grind Ring in Pills texture

I received the Pills Grind Ring in “Green UV,” one of Godemiche’s brightest shades.

This is perhaps the softest of all the Grind Ring textures, and Godemiche recommends it as a suitable texture for beginners to grinding toy. The Pills texture offers a flicking sensation similar to the Spikes and Tall Pyramids, but far softer. Even when you grind down hard into it, the overall sensation is still pretty light. This one borders on tickly.

I often reach for the Pills Grind Ring at the start of a session because it’s a great warm-up texture.

Godemiche Grind Ring: “Tall Waves”

Godemiche Grind Ring in Tall Waves texture

I received the Tall Waves ring in Godemiche Purple, the company’s signature shade.

The Tall Waves is a twist on the original Waves texture, only with higher ridges. Like the original Waves, this one offers continuous, rhythmic back-and-forth thanks to the softness and close placement of the silicone tongues. This one is soft enough for a long session but intense enough that it usually doesn’t take very long at all to get me off.

Godemiche Grind Ring Tall Waves

High Grind Ring: “Bubbles”

Godemiche High Grind Ring

Godemiche’s High Grind Ring variation is different from the original design in one important way: it has “a much larger mound designed to bring the texture even closer to your body while being designed to be comfortable on your genitals.”

Other than that, it’s the same Grind Ring design you know and love. I received the High Grind Ring in the Bubbles texture, which was the only one available at the time. It’s now also available in “Spikes,” “Tall Waves,” and a new texture known as “Suckers.”

Bubbles isn’t a Grind Ring texture I reach for super often as it’s a little too gentle for me. But the more raised style of the High Grind Ring adds a little more of the intensity I was seeking. The silicone mound provides more to grind against and is firm enough to offer significant pressure.

Interestingly, due to the more raised mound, the High Grind provides slightly more focused clitoral pressure and slightly less in terms of broad, all-over vulva stimulation. This isn’t necessarily a good or bad thing. It’s just different, and you should take your own preferences into account when deciding whether the Low Grind or High Grind will work best for you.

Verdict

I still love the absolute fuck out of these toys. They’re innovative, they’re versatile, and they’re shockingly effective.

Totally fucking brilliant. I am obsessed with the Godemiche Grind Rings and I will be shouting about them to anyone who will listen.

Grind Rings start from £39.99. Custom colours, a higher mound, or adding a vibrating “V-Plate” all increase the cost.

Thanks to Godemiche for sending me these toys to review. Affiliate links appear in this post. All views, as ever, are my own.

[Toy Review] Womanizer Premium 2

Long-time readers might remember my Womanizer Premium review from way back in 2018. Well, did you know that there’s a new Womanizer clitoral stimulator on the market? Enter the new, upgraded Womanizer Premium 2, the subject of today’s review. Whether you’ve seen the Womanizer Premium 2 in porn and are wondering whether it’s worth the money, or you have the original and you’re considering upgrading, you’ll find all the answers here.

Womanizer Premium vs. Premium 2 Reviews: What’s the Difference?

Womanizer Premium 2 clit sucker

The Womanizer Premium 2 has a lot in common with the original Womanizer Premium. It’s the same size (6.5″ in length) and the same basic design and structure. It features the same tapered body, coated in silky-smooth, body-safe silicone, and the same removable nozzle.

There are two main differences, as follows:

  • The Womanizer Premium 2 offers 14 speed settings (the Premium has an already-impressive 12).
  • The “autopilot” mode has been improved and upgraded for the Premium 2.

Surprisingly, they retail for the same price: £169.99 ($199.99).

The Womanizer Premium 2 comes in 5 colourways. Mine is a gorgeous midnight blue with a silver accent. It is fully waterproof, and rechargeable via the included cable, with a full charge giving you over two hours of use.

What’s in the Box?

The Womanizer Premium 2 comes in beautiful, elegant packaging that is reminiscent of the sort of box high-end perfume might come in. If you’re buying the toy as a gift (or a gift to yourself), it definitely has that “luxury” feel.

In the box, alongside the stimulator, you’ll find:

  • Magnetic USB charging cable
  • Cotton storage pouch
  • An extra nozzle in a different size
  • A quick-start guide
  • A set of safety instructions

The inclusion of a storage bag is appreciated, and the extra nozzle (presented in a little packet rather fetchingly decorated with vulva drawings!) is a nice inclusion and a nod to the fact that bodies come in different shapes and sizes.

Womanizer Premium extra nozzles in bag with vulva drawing

Coffee & Kink Reviews the Womanizer Premium 2: In Use

The Womanizer Premium 2 is a delight to handle and use. It is comfortable to hold, and the buttons are intuitively placed and easy to push. You might need to try different ways of positioning it to see what works best for your body. For me, I hold it upside down (so with the tapered end facing towards my face) to make contact with my clit from above, but some people find that the other way around, or even a side-on approach, works best. The only right way is the way that works for you!

Womanizer Premium 2 buttons

Thanks to its enormous 14 levels of power, the Womanizer Premium 2 offers very small and incremental speed increases, from the lowest purring rumble to the rip-the-orgasm-from-your-body top setting. If you’re very sensitive, this can be a good way to explore different levels of intensity without getting overstimulated. For me, the sweet spot was between about level 9 and level 13. Anything lower wasn’t intense enough, but the very top was a little too much.

No other suction toy has ever gotten me off as quickly as this one does. The first time I tested it, it took me from zero to orgasm in less than ten minutes. Subsequent attempts have more or less replicated that experience. Of course, it’s possible to drag it out by using lower settings or just backing off from the edge.

I also love Womanizer’s “Smart Silence” feature. This simply means that when the toy is on, the motor only activates when it’s actually against your body. If discretion or being able to stop your toy instantly is important to you, this is a nice feature. I just like it because it means that the Womanizer Premium 2 doesn’t keep buzzing away next to me when I’m grabbing lube or queuing up some audio porn.

The main downside of the Womanizer Premium 2 in use is that it’s a little noisy. It’s quieter than some of my power-tool mains wand vibrators, but definitely significantly louder than my trusty go-to bullet.

About that Autopilot Feature

I didn’t care for the Womanizer 2’s autopilot feature at all, and I’m afraid my assessment still stands. One of the biggest benefits of masturbation is knowing exactly what your body needs and being able to adjust accordingly. Autopilot removes that, and the result is random changes in stimulation that can seriously disrupt

When I tried the autopilot mode, I soon ended up frustrated and annoyed. I switched the toy back to manual mode as soon as I felt I’d given autopilot a fair shot for the sake of writing up this review. Is it better than the original Womanizer Premium’s autopilot feature? Yes. Do I still kind of hate it? Also yes.

Your mileage may vary, of course. If you love unpredictability and being surprised by changes in intensity, the autopilot mode may be a great feature for you. It’s not bad, it’s just not right for me.

Womanizer Premium 2 Review: Verdict

The Womanizer Premium was an excellent clitoral suction toy, and the Premium 2 is a worthy update to that original design. The two extra settings are much appreciated, and the autopilot is noticeably better even if I don’t actually like it.

This is a seriously pricey toy, though you do get bang for your buck (so to speak). If £169.99 is a bit steep for you, the Womanizer Classic (priced at £119.99) and its variations are great alternatives, offering the same sensations, just with fewer settings and no Smart Silence.

Thanks to Womanizer for sending me this product to review. All pictures and all views, as ever, are mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.