[Toy Reviews] Funzze 3-in-1 Sucking & Flapping Thrusting Triple Stimulator

Toys that try to have multiple functions are a mixed bag, and today I’m trying another one! This time we’re looking at Funzze’s 3-in-1 triple stimulator, a vibrator/sucker/thruster toy for both penetrative and clitoral stimulation.

What is the Funzze 3-in-1 Triple Stimulator Vibrator?

The Funzze 3-in-1 Sucking & Flapping Thrusting Vibrator (hereafter the Funzze 3-in-1 for the sake of brevity) is a triple stimulator that offers three different ways to use it. Its head end features a clitoral suction stimulator on one side and, on the reverse side, this same motor allows the flat surface to make a “tapping” motion. At the other end, the toy’s handle is also an insertable dildo with a thrusting mechanism.

Funzze triple stimulator official product picture to show clitoral suction and tapping motions
Image: Funzze

The Funzze 3-in-1 Triple Stimulator is made of body-safe silicone and available in either purple or green. It is IPX-6 waterproof (suitable for use in the shower and for cleaning under the tap, but not fully submersible) and USB rechargeable. It measures around 7.5″ in total length, 3.5″ in insertable length.

Funzze triple stimulator 3-in-1 vibrator shown in purple and green
Image: Funzze

What I Liked About the Funzze 3-in-1

There’s a common problem with sex toys that try to do too many different things: they do none of them particularly well. Happily, this isn’t the case with the Funzze 3-in-1. Let’s talk about the things I liked about this triple stimulator.

  • The clitoral suction part performs well. It is moderately intense on the lowest setting and very intense on the higher ones. One thing to be aware of is that the nozzle is on the smaller side, so if you have a larger clit that might be something to be aware of. But if you enjoy serious focused clitoral stimulation, this toy will likely work well for you.
  • The tapping function is genuinely excellent. The stimulation it provides offers the depth and intensity of very rumbly vibrations. Even the lowest speed feels surprisingly intense, particularly for a toy at this price-point.
  • The construction of Funzze Triple Stimulator toy feels sturdy. I can press it firmly against my body and get plenty of pressure without feeling like I’m going to damage it.
  • I kind of like that the suction and tapping functions operate off the same motor. This means you can switch between the two in a second, just by turning it around.
Funzze triple stimulator 3-in-1 vibrator in purple with buttons illuminated in blue

  • The two motors—suction/tapping and thrusting—are controllable separately. They can also be used together, though I can’t think of any reason you’d want to that doesn’t defy the laws of physics!
  • The controls are simple and intuitive, and the buttons are easy to press.
  • The thrusting part has quite a short “length”—only maybe an inch or two of thrust. This won’t work for everyone, of course, but for those who (like me) enjoy penetration but often find deep thrusting more painful than pleasurable, it’s a great choice.
  • With 10 thrusting speeds and 10 sucking/tapping intensity levels, the Funzze Triple Stimulator is a truly customisable experience with numerous options for different users and different preferences.
  • It comes with a storage bag included.
  • The retail price of $42.99 (that’s around £34) is exceptional value for the quality.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

There’s one main thing I don’t like about the Funzze 3-in-1 triple stimulator: the noise. Whichever way you’re using it, this thing is loud. Both the loud buzz of the head end and the back-and-forth squeak of the thruster are really offputting and grating to me. Which is a shame in a product that I otherwise liked so much.

Funzze triple stimulator 3-in-1 vibrator

My other criticism is the lack of dual-directional controls. Whichever of the Funzze Triple Stimulator toy’s three functions I’m using, it would be nice to be able to scroll through the speeds in either direction.

Funzze 3-in-1 Triple Stimulator: Verdict

Overall, the Funzze 3-in-1 is a much better product than many of the “multiple things in one” options on the market. The clitoral suction stimulator does its job well, and the thrusting function is gentle enough that I can actually use it. It’s that glorious tapping function, though, that really elevates this one for me.

A surprising winner. Good job, Funzze!

The Funzze 3-in-1 triple stimulation toy retails for $42.99.

Thanks to Funzze for sponsoring this review of their triple stimulation toy! This means they paid me to test the toy and write an honest account of my experience. All views, as always, are mine.

[Toy Review] We-Vibe Wand 2

I was surprised, looking back, to see that I never published a We-Vibe Wand review on here when the first iteration of this toy launched back in 2020. I was sure I had, but apparently not. Anyway, I received the new edition – the Wand 2 – this week, so you’re getting a We-Vibe Wand review at last!

We-Vibe Wand 2: Details

We-Vive Wand 2 vibrator in its box

The We-Vibe Wand 2 is a cordless wand vibrator. It measures around 11″ in total length, with a 2.1″ diameter head at its widest point. It is made of soft and body-safe purple silicone, with a curved handle, large head, and flexible neck. The Wand is controllable either manually or through the We-Vibe app. Additional features include a travel lock and WOW Tech’s[1] Smart Silence functionality – more on that in a minute.

We-Vibe Wand 2 on grey blanket

The Wand 2 is USB rechargeable, giving around 2 hours of runtime for a 2.5 hour full charge. It is also IPX7 waterproof, meaning you can use it safely in the bath or shower.

[1] We-Vibe’s parent company which also owns brands such as Womanizer, Romp, and Arcwave.

What I Liked About the We-Vibe Wand 2

At risk of spoiler-ing myself before I get to the overall verdict, let’s begin by acknowledging that the We-Vibe Wand 2 is a genuinely fucking excellent vibrator. I’m not usually particularly brand-loyal when it comes to sex toys, but I do make an exception for my wands (#Doxy4Life!) It takes a lot for another wand to make it into my easy-access sex chest. But this one has managed it.

Image for We-Vibe Wand review showing the toy's bendy neck

What makes it so great?

  • Intense, deep, powerful, and rumbly as fuck vibrations. This is one of the rumbliest vibrators I have ever used. Even better, it keeps that rumbliness even on the highest settings. I can’t sing the praises of this toy’s vibrations enough. Whatever motor We-Vibe are using, they have set a new gold standard for cordless toys with this one.
  • The shape of the head is fantastic. With the broad, rounded sides and pronounced “pleasure edges”, you can switch easily between broad and focused stimulation.
  • The flexible neck enables easy and comfortable positioning.
  • The manual controls are simple and comprehensive. You can scroll in either direction through the 10 vibration patterns and 10 intensity levels, setting exactly the combination you prefer and moving between them easily.
  • If you have the original We-Vibe Wand, its two included attachments will also fit on the Wand 2. Other brands’ wand attachments may also work. For example, though the fit isn’t quite perfect, I’ve found that I can easily use my Godemiche Wand Toppers with the Wand 2.
We-Vibe Wand 2 with wand attachments
Feat. wand attachments from We-Vibe Wand original

  • Connecting to the We-Vibe app (formerly WeConnect) is quick and straightforward. If it’s been a while since you downloaded the We-Vibe app, you might need to update it or download the newest version for it to pick up the Wand 2, but that’s also fast and free.
  • The app offers various possibilities, such as controlling the toy from your phone, switching between your favourite settings instantly, or creating “playlists” of various settings in a particular order. You can also use Ambient Mode to vibe along to ambient noise (in my experience it has to be pretty loud for this to really work) or Beat Mode to connect your toy to music stored on your device (not compatible with music from streaming apps.) And, of course, you can hand over control to a partner from anywhere in the world as long as they have an internet connection.
  • The app’s responsiveness is reliable and instant.
  • The app is a nice-to-have rather an an essential. As someone who rarely uses sex toy apps in real-world contexts outside of reviewing, I much prefer the toys to speak for themselves and the apps to be optional extras. This toy achieves that aim.
  • The Smart Silence function is one of my favourite ever WOW Tech inventions. This means that the toy is equipped with a sensor and will start vibrating when it is in contact with your body, then stop automatically when you take it away. This is ideal for people who require discretion, and also for people who prefer a seamless stop-and-start experience. Smart Silence is on by default, but you can also switch it off if you find you don’t like it.
  • Though not exactly “whisper quiet” (stop claiming this, toy companies, it’s almost never true!), the We-Vibe Wand 2’s sound level is reasonably unobtrusive particularly for its level of power.
  • Great value. To be clear, the We-Vibe Wand 2 isn’t a cheap toy. But for what you get, the price of £129.99 in the UK/$149 in the US is very reasonable.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

Because no product is perfect, the We-Vibe Wand 2 does have some minor downsides too.

  • Unlike the original We-Vibe Wand, the Wand 2 does not come with any attachments included. This wasn’t really an issue for me personally because, as mentioned above, it will work with the attachments I still have from my original Wand as well as other attachments in my collection. However, that won’t be true for people who didn’t own the We-Vibe Wand original or who don’t already have a collection of attachments.
  • The app’s “Touch Mode”, as I’ve identified in previous reviews, is pretty useless. The vibrations will turn on in response to touches, but whatever I do I cannot get the intensity to change.
  • It’s pretty heavy.
  • A lot of the vibrations transfer through the handle, particularly on the higher settings. This can be a problem for people who suffer with hand pain or discomfort.

We-Vibe Wand Review: Verdict

This is an absolutely amazing toy.

With the exception of the lack of attachments, this iteration is an improvement in virtually every way on the original We-Vibe Wand. It has better app connectivity and responsiveness, more comprehensive manual controls, and a better head design. Most importantly, it has one of the best – if not the best – motors I’ve ever encountered in a cordless toy.

You can purchase the We-Vibe Wand 2 from Lovehoney UK for £129.99 or Lovehoney US for $149. It is also available directly from We-Vibe North America and We-Vibe Europe.

Thanks to Lovehoney for enabling this We-Vibe Wand review by sending me the Wand 2 to try. All views are, as always, my own. Affiliate links appear in this post.

[Toy Reviews] Tracy’s Dog Toys: Beta & Elatia

Since going viral with their OG Sucking Vibrator thanks to a hilarious Amazon review back in 2019, the oddly-named but highly successful Tracy’s Dog have added an array of new products to their range. This month, I received two new Tracy’s Dog toys to try: the Beta (full name the Beta Rabbit 3-in-1 Sucking Swing Vibrator) and the Elatia (full name the Elatia Clitoral Tickling Vibrator.)

Tracy's Dog toys Beta & Elatia

The company asked me to create a single post covering both of these products, so it’s time for a duo of mini reviews of two Tracy’s Dog rabbit toys: the Beta and Elatia.

Tracy’s Dog Beta: Details

Let’s start with the Beta.

Tracy's Dog rabbit vibrator Beta

The Tracy’s Dog Beta is a rabbit-style vibrator with a clitoral suction arm rather than the more traditional clitoral vibrator. The vibrating internal arm makes a come-hither back-and-forth motion designed to mimic the movement of a lover’s fingers against your G-spot.

This toy is made of body-safe silicone in dark purple, with a pink plastic accent panel on the back. It measures around 9.5″ in total length, 5″ in insertable length, and 1.4″ in diameter at the widest point.

The Beta is USB rechargeable and you’ll get around an hour of battery life out of a full charge. It is IPX5 waterproof, which means it can withstand jets of water but not submersion. In other words, you can clean it under the tap but don’t use it in the bath.

The Tracy’s Dog Beta retails for £59.28 at time of writing. Let’s look at what I liked and disliked about it.

What I Liked About the Tracy’s Dog Beta

  • The flexibility of both shafts is excellent, meaning that it will work for a wider range of bodies.
  • I love the come-hither motion, which feels fantastic.
  • The internal arm and the clitoral stimulator can be controlled separately, and even used independently of one another.
  • When I can get it positioned properly, the clitoral stimulator is reasonably pleasurable on the highest setting.
  • Its noise level is pretty quiet, particularly the whirring sound made by the come-hither motion.
  • The curved handle makes the toy easy to hold and the buttons are well positioned and easy to press.

What I Didn’t Like About the Beta

  • I wish it was possible to use the Tracy’s Dog Beta’s come-hither motion without the vibrations. Like a lot of people, I don’t find internal vibrations pleasurable and they can even be actively uncomfortable.
  • The vibrations themselves are super buzzy.
  • No matter how I positioned it, I couldn’t get the clitoral stimulator to make a good connection with my clit without having to angle the internal part in a way that was painful.
  • I wish the clitoral stimulator had more settings. The internal arm has an impressive ten, but the suction part only three. To me, this speaks to an ongoing problem with the design of these types of toys: it views clitoral stimulation as an afterthought or add-on, rather than the main event that it is for the vast majority of vulva-owners.
  • A toy that retails for almost £60 really should be properly waterproof.

Let’s move on to the Elatia.

Tracy’s Dog Elatia: Details

The Elatia is one of the newest Tracy’s Dog toys and, like the Beta, is a rabbit style toy with a difference.

Tracy's Dog rabbit vibrator Elatia

Like the Beta, the Tracy’s Dog Elatia is also made of dark purple silicone. It has a gold plastic accent around the button panel. This one features two internal “ears” that move back and forth in an alternating motion, and a “tickling” clitoral stimulator made up of lots of little flexible strands.

The Elatia measures around 10″ in total length, 5.5″ in insertable length, and 1.3″ in diameter at the widest point.

The Elatia is USB rechargeable, and again you’ll get about an hour of use from a full charge. This toy is IPX6 waterproof, meaning it is protected from powerful jets of water. This one is likely fine for shower play and washing under the tap, but again should not be submerged.

The Elatia retails for £56.46 at the time of writing.

What I Liked About the Elatia

  • The shape and construction of this one works well for my body. It is easy to insert it and then position the external stimulator over my clit without needing to contort into any weird positions!
  • It has 10 different vibration modes, 7 tickling modes, and 6 come-hither modes. Considering you can use them in any combination, this is hundreds of possible mix-and-match combos to figure out what works for your body.
  • The almost “tapping” sensation you get from the internal ears is really interesting and different. Personally I only like it on the lowest setting, as anything more becomes too intense, but your mileage may vary.
  • All three motors are controllable completely independently. Want clit tickling and vibrations without internal movement? Want the come-hither motion without vibrations? All three at once? You got it.
  • The clit tickler is truly excellent. It’s more gentle than a traditional vibrator, and I’m not sure I could ever orgasm from it, but as either a warm-up or an addition to internal stimulation it’s amazing. I kind of want a clitoral toy that just does that now, to be honest!
  • The clitoral stimulator’s motor is good – it’s strong and not buzzy.
  • Like the Beta, the Tracy’s Dog Elatia’s noise level is relatively quiet and unobtrusive compared with many similar toys I’ve tried.

What I Didn’t Like About the Elatia

  • The shaft is completely rigid, meaning that positioning options are limited. The shape of this one actually works reasonably well for my body, as mentioned above, but the rigidity means it won’t work for a lot of users.
  • All those little silicone fronds and the space between the ears are a nightmare to clean.
  • The internal vibrations have a decent level of power, but they’re so buzzy that all the benefits of that power are lost.
  • As I said about the Beta, the Tracy’s Dog Elatia should really be submersible at this price point.

Tracy’s Dog Beta vs Elatia: Which One Did I Like Best?

This probably isn’t going to surprise anyone who has noted the disparity in the likes/dislikes lists, but of these two Tracy’s Dog rabbit toys I far prefer the Elatia. It works much better for my body from a positioning perspective, has an actually-good clitoral stimulator, and has completely independent controls for the three motors.

I don’t think the Beta is necessarily a bad product. I just don’t think it’s one for me.

Thanks to Tracy’s Dog for sponsoring this review and sending me the Beta and Elatia rabbit vibrators to try! All views are, as always, my own. Check out my other Tracy’s Dog toy reviews and peruse their catalogue for more.

[Toy Review] Womanizer Vibe

Womanizer are best known for their high-end clitoral suction toys. From the travel-friendly Liberty to the revolutionary Next, Enhance, and many more, I’ve loved many of their products over the years. So when I saw they were releasing a vibrator, I immediately knew that a Womanizer Vibe review was in my near future.

What is the Womanizer Vibe?

Womanizer Vibe in box

It’s a vibe. By Womanizer. Yeah, the name pretty much does what it says on the tin with this one.

Specifically, the Womanizer Vibe is a vibrator shaped like many of the iconic Womanizer suction toys I’ve reviewed, with a tapered handle and a rounded end. This end is normally where the suction nozzle would go, but instead we get a kind of hooked head with a central ridge leading to a gentle point. The entire toy measures around 6″ in length.

Womanizer Vibe in green

The main body of the Womanizer Vibe is soft, body-safe silicone and the bottom part of the handle is plastic. Mine is a gorgeous mint green colour. It also comes in blue and pink. The Vibe is IPX-7 waterproof and rechargeable with the included magnetic USB cable. Its running time is around 90 minutes.

According to the product page, the Womanizer Vibe is specifically “designed to be less intense than a pin-point clitoral vibrator.” We’ll get into more of my thoughts on that below.

Womanizer Vibe Review: What I Liked

When I received this toy, I showed the box to Mr C&K. “This toy is described as noiseless,” I said. “That’s obviously going to be laughably untrue, but how laughably untrue do you think it’s going to be?”

Well, fuck me because Womanizer have just made me eat my words. Now it isn’t really technically accurate that the Womanizer Vibe is “noiseless”—it does make some sound—but this thing is seriously, seriously quiet. It’s the kind of low, unobtrusive hum that could come from a household appliance, fan, or air conditioner. No-one is hearing this toy outside your closed bedroom door unless your walls are made of paper. So yes, it is as close to noiseless as I believe it is possible for a vibrator to get.

Womanizer Vibe back side showing buttons

What else did I like about the Womanizer Vibe?

  • The Womanizer Vibe is literally the rumbliest toy I’ve ever tried and reviewed. This thing gives the kind of deep, penetrating rumbles that very few toys manage. Apparently this is due to something called “UltraWave Vibration.”
  • Its shape is absolutely brilliant. The broad, smooth sides allow for all-over stimulation, while the central ridge and slightly raised edges offer more precision. Personally, my favourite way to use it is to place the central tip against my clit.
  • With its broad back and raised head, it is ideal for placing on a bed or other surface and grinding against.
  • The tapered handle is comfortable to hold.
  • It has an intuitive and simple three-button interface.
  • Apart from the easily-avoidable Autopilot sillyness (more on that below), there are no annoying patterns. Just 10 speeds of constant vibration.
  • It came beautifully packaged in a box that wouldn’t look out of place containing a piece of high-end tech.
  • It’s gorgeous. Of course, form matters less than functionality when it comes to sex toys, but it doesn’t hurt when they’re pretty and in one of my favourite colours.

The Womanizer Vibe is not the most powerful toy on the market. In fact, Womanizer specifically markets it as being less intense than some of the other products out there. Even so, turns out that rumbles are more important than sheer intensity alone. The orgasms I have with this toy are a slower build than with many of the other vibrators in my collection, but

Anything I Didn’t Like?

I really had to scramble for anything negative to include in my Womanizer Vibe review. Sure, in a totally ideal world I would have liked it to go a notch or two more powerful. But it’s so rumbly that I don’t really miss the extra insensity.

Womanizer Vibe in green held in a woman's hand

A remote control might also have been nice. This vibrator was made for grinding against, and it’s tricky to change the setting when it’s underneath you. A remote would solve this.

I also think the “Autopilot” functions are a bit silly. I don’t want the toy controlling what sensations I feel unless the toy can register and understand my reactions and respond according. (Which, as a concept, sounds equal parts seriously fucking cool and like a Black Mirror episode.) Needless to say it cannot, so instead it’s just a bunch of random intensity changes and the risk of ruining my orgasm. No thank you.

Womanizer Vibe Review: Verdict

This is an excellent vibrator.

The Womanizer Vibe is likely to particularly suit those with sensitive clits, anyone who prefers very rumbly vibrations, and those who enjoy a more all-over, less pinpoint type of clitoral stimulation.

The Womanizer Vibe retails for £119.99 at Lovehoney UK and $129 at Lovehoney US.

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the Womanizer Vibe to review! All views are my own. Affiliate links appear in this post and you can get 10% off any Lovehoney order with my code AFF-COFFKINK10.

[Toy Review] Tracy’s Dog Surreal App-Controlled Lipstick Vibrator

Even those who are nowhere near as deep in the world of sex toys as I am might have heard of Tracy’s Dog [1]. One Amazon user went slightly viral back in 2019 for her hilarious Tracy’s Dog review. Of her experience using the OG Sucking Vibrator, the anonymous woman wrote: “My legs went straight out like those goats who faint when scared.”

Honestly, I should probably hang up my keyboard right now. I am literally a professional sex toy reviewer and yet nothing I ever write will be as succinctly, brilliantly descriptive and hilarious as that line.

As it is, however, I’m not going anywhere and I am back with my latest Tracy’s Dog review. This time I’m looking at the Surreal bullet vibrator. Did it match up to the lofty heights of the company’s previous viral sensation?

Tracy's Dog vibrator box

[1] Apparently this objectively incredibly strange name came about because the company wanted their toys to become “faithful and loyal companions”. Like… well, like a dog. No, I don’t get it, either.

Tracy’s Dog Surreal: What Is It?

The Tracy’s Dog Surreal, which I received to review this week, is a lipstick-shaped bullet vibrator with app-controlled functionalities and a single control button on the toy itself. It measures just over 3.5″ in total length, weights a petite 197g, and has a broad base that enables it to stand up.

Tracy's Dog Surreal lipstick vibrator

This toy is made of body-safe silicone in bright red. It is USB rechargeable and waterproof, and offers 10 different vibration settings (3 constant speeds and 4 patterns.)

The Surreal works with an app, the bafflingly-named “Monster Party” which as far as I can tell appears to be a generic “interactive platform with adults” that connects up with various different sex toys.

What I Liked About the Surreal

Let’s start the review by talking about what I liked about the Tracy’s Dog Surreal—which, despite some issues I had with it that we’ll cover in the next section, is actually quite a lot!

  • The silicone is soft and the basic construction of the toy appears to be solid.
  • The lipstick design is cute and the bright red colour is vibrant and attractive.
  • It arrived attractively packaged in a sturdy box with a magnetic fastener and no single-use plastic.
  • I really like the shape. The broad shaft, flat end, and pinpoint tip of the lipstick design allow for different types of stimulator.
  • The broad base makes it comfortable to hold and use. Its petite size and light weight will make it easy and manageable for most users.
  • The button is large, well-placed, and easy to press.
  • It comes with a plastic case that slides over the toy like the top part of a lipstick tube. This is great for travel and for keeping the toy hygienic in storage, preventing it from picking up dust and lint if it’s sitting in a drawer for a while. Honestly, if you prefer a more rigid surface to your toys and don’t mind the extra little bit of dampening to the vibrations, you can even use it with the plastic cover on.
Surreal lipstick vibrator for Tracy's Dog review

  • In theory (more on that in a minute) it has app-control functionalities. This means you can hand over control to a partner from anywhere in the world.
  • Being waterproof makes it bath/shower friendly as well as super easy to clean. Being waterproof seems to be becoming more and more of a standard in the sex toy industry. However, you don’t always see it on toys at this price-point so it’s a nice extra.
  • The Tracy’s Dog Surreal retails for a budget-friendly £37.27 at the time of writing, which is incredibly affordable compared to many of the app-controlled toys I’ve reviewed.

Anything I Didn’t Like?

Unfortunately, there were also a few problems I had with this toy.

Perhaps most worryingly, when I was testing the Tracy’s Dog Surreal for this review I could not get my toy to connect with the app at all. (Given that the app has less than two stars in the app store reviews, I can’t say I’m entirely surprised!) I followed the instructions, but nothing happened. I switched it off and back on again, and still nothing happened.

Monster Party app screenshot

In practice, I actually use sex toy apps very rarely. I’m glad they exist, but I mostly just use them to review products then forget I have them. But if you’re specifically looking for an app-controlled toy—and considering this is one of the major selling points of this product—it’s pretty bad.

My other significant complaint about the Tracy’s Dog Surreal is that its vibrations are just… okay. They’re neither particularly strong nor particularly rumbly. I knew the moment that I switched it on and turned it up to the highest speed that it had little to no chance of giving me an orgasm.

Finally, it has one of those one-button interfaces that always annoy me so much.

Tracy’s Dog Surreal Review: Verdict

This toy is about what I would expect for the price. It’s broadly fine, but it’s nothing to write home about. Honestly, even at this price point, there are better toys available. If you want the app functionality on a budget, and don’t need particularly strong vibrations, you might get on fine with it (if you can get the app to work! It’s possible, of course, that I was just unlucky with this but given the app’s rating I can’t believe I am the only one having this problem.)

Woman's hand holding Tracy's Dog lipstick vibrator

Despite the negatives I’ve pointed out, the Tracy’s Dog Surreal is a body-safe and easy to use offering. It might suit those who are newer to exploring toys. It could also be good for those looking for something cute and non-threatening in appearance or who prefer low-strength to mid-strength vibrations. It’ll be a great toy for some people, I just don’t think I’m one of them. As such, I will likely pass this one along so someone else can enjoy it.

Thanks to the company for sponsoring this Tracy’s Dog review. This means I was paid to write an honest account of my experience with the product. In addition, if you make a purchase through my links I will earn a small commission. All views are, as always, mine!

[Toy Review] Pleasure Engine Rose Clit Sucker

One rose clit sucker had a viral moment a few years ago thanks, in large part, to TikTok. Some of those reviews were hilarious, and others made incredible claims about how many orgasms they had or how quickly they had them.

As you might know, I’m rather cynical about intense sex toy marketing claims. Even so, I thought it was time I brought you my take on another iteration of the famed rose clit sucker: The Rose by Pleasure Engine.

The Rose by Pleasure Engine

Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker

The Rose by Pleasure Engine is one of many (many) pressure wave stimulators that look like a red rose currently on the market. It has an opening at the top that sits over your clit, creating a seal. Rapid air pulses then provide the stimulation, which some describe as a “sucking” feeling.

The Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker is rechargeable, with a USB magnetic charging station included. I got about an hour of use out of a two-hour charge. It is small, measuring only 2.6″ in total length, and fits in the palm of my hand.

The Rose is made of body-safe silicone and is splashproof but not waterproof.

Pleasure Engine Rose Clit Sucker Review: What I Liked

Fundamentally, these products are so popular because they work incredibly well for a lot of people. The Pleasure Engine Rose is no different; it gets me off with the kind of orgasm that leaves my legs shaking. Its pressure waves are perhaps not as smooth as those of some higher-end toys I’ve tried, but they still get the job done reliably every time.

Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker

The nozzle size of the various rose clit sucker toys I’ve reviewed varies, and this one is on the smaller side. It works well for me because my clitoral glans (that’s the external bit) is also fairly small. If you have a larger clit, you might want to look at toys with a wider nozzle. The small size of this one’s nozzle allows it to closely engulf my clit and provide targeted, pinpoint stimulation.

I also think rose toys are popular because they’re aesthetically pleasing. The little silicone petals around the nozzle have no practical purpose, but they do look cute.

The Pleasure Engine Rose is super light, easy to hold, and not too loud.

Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker

Finally, this is more about the marketing than the toy itself, but I also have to give Pleasure Engine and Shevibe props for not claiming that this toy feels like cunnilingus. I’m so sick of the tendency to call suction toys “oral sex simulators.” They’re not. The technology does not exist yet to realistically mimic cunnilingus with a toy. Let’s move on.

Pleasure Engine Rose Clit Sucker Review: Anything I Didn’t Like?

Overall, the Pleasure Engine Rose is a good toy, especially for its price-point. I’m just not sure we needed another of these. I do understand cashing in on viral trends, but almost every sex toy company I can think of that makes clitoral suction toys has now released its own version of the rose. And, a few small details notwithstanding, they’re all kinda sorta very much the same. Even many of the “related products” that show up when I view this one are virtually the same product only made by a different manufacturer.

I also kinda wish it was fully waterproof. This used to be a luxury feature only found on high-end toys, but it’s increasingly becoming standard. The Rose is splash-resistant, but not properly waterproof, so you can’t use it in the bath or submerge it to clean.

I would have preferred a two-button interface rather than a single button, too, as the Rose has 9 settings in total (3 speeds and 6 patterns).

Verdict

If you don’t already have a rose toy and are looking to try one (or have worn yours out and are looking for a replacement) this is as good a choice as any… and, bonus, not sold by Amazon. Please don’t buy sex toys on Amazon, I’m begging you. There is a very significant chance you’ll get a knock-off that may not be body-safe and may not even work.

The Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker is body-safe, gets the job done, and is sold by a reputable company with a great reputation in the world of pleasure products. This toy retails for a very affordable £23/$29.99 from Shevibe.

Thanks to Shevibe for sending me the Pleasure Engine Rose clit sucker to review. All views are, as always, my own

[Toy Review] The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator

This is the third in my series of reviews for new brand The One. These toys are available exclusively at Sex Toys UK here in the UK, while across the pond they’re available at retailers such as Babeland and Good Vibes. Next on the list is a review of The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator.

Those who read my work regularly will know that I have a mixed relationship with rabbit vibrators. I’ve tried a few I liked and a lot I didn’t, but I very rarely reach for them as a preference. With that in mind, let’s find out how I got on with the Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator from The One.

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator: Details

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator is a toy in the classic “rabbit vibe” style. Its total length is 9.5″, its insertable length is around 5.5″, and its diameter is 1.5″ at the widest point. Its clitoral stimulator consists of two flexible ears.

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator is USB rechargeable and waterproof. It is made of body-safe and non-porous silicone.

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator Review: What I Liked

Before I get into all the things that annoyed me about this toy (and, as you’ll see from the section below, there are a lot!) I tried to find some things to like about it.

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator close up on rabbit ears clit stimulator

  • The thrusting function is decent. I can feel it consistently, it offers 10 different speed and pattern options, and its relatively short thrusting length is a great option for anyone who enjoys this sensation but does not enjoy getting poked in the cervix.
  • The flexibility of the clitoral stimulator makes it easy to position it correctly for your body.
  • The gentle curve and slight flex to the upper portion of the insertable arm makes the toy more comfortable to use and enables more precise G-spot targeting.
  • You can have the vibrations turned on without the thrusting function, and vice-versa, or you can use them together.

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator Review: What I Didn’t Like

My ultimate complaint with this toy, as is so often the case, is just that it’s never going to give me an orgasm. Though I like the thrusting function, the motor is buzzy as hell and the vibrations aren’t particularly strong.

The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator buttons

When are sex toy manufacturers going to understand that for a large majority of people with vulvas, clitoral stimulation isn’t an afterthought? It’s the main event that many, many, many of us require to orgasm.

Other things I didn’t like about The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator include:

  • One day, a company will come up with a way to make a thrusting toy that doesn’t make a horrible high-pitched whining noise. Sadly, today is not that day. Like almost every other thrusting toy I’ve reviewed, the One Thrusting Rabbit makes exactly that noise. Even though I like how thrusting toys feel, I rarely actually use them because this noise is just such an unpleasant sensory experience.
  • Though you can control the vibrations and the thrusting separately, you cannot control the vibrations in the ears and the shaft separately. This is a pretty major problem for anyone who, like me, finds internal vibrations more uncomfortable than pleasurable.
  • The ears are far too flexible and flimsy to give any significant clitoral stimulation. If you like any pressure at all, forget it.
  • The silicone around the base of the shaft is incredibly thin. This means that you can see and feel the mechanisms underneath. More egregiously, though, I’ve used this toy once and I have just discovered a tear in the silicone! That’s a pretty unforgiveable design flaw. It presents a risk of bacteria transfer and seriously calls into question the safety and quality of the entire product.
The One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator close up on rip in the silicone

  • The rigidity of the lower portion of the insertable arm significantly limits positioning options.
  • It’s so pink. I’m not totally against pink in principle, but it’s massively overused in sex toys. Especially this glaringly bright, eye-hurting, practically-neon shade.
  • The charging time is 150 minutes (two and a half hours) and you only get around 50 minutes of use on a full charge.

Verdict

My basic conclusion to this review was that the One Thrusting Rabbit is an okay but unremarkable rabbit vibrator. The thrusting function is decent (the noise aside), but the motor is extremely buzzy and the lack of dual controls for the vibrations really pushes this one into more “miss” than “hit” for me. And, of course, the silicone tearing after one use is really, really bad.

It’s also absurdly overpriced at £138.78 from Sex Toys UK and $141.95 from Babeland and Good Vibes. That’s only slightly less than the Osci by Lovense, a high-end brand with premium prices.

Skip it. Lovehoney’s Thrusting Happy Rabbit (UK link) is way better, if you’re looking for a thrusting rabbit vibrator specifically.

Thanks to Sex Toys UK for sending me the One Thrusting Rabbit Vibrator to review. All views are, as always, mine. Affiliate links appear in this post.

Buying Guide: The Best Clit Grinder Sex Toys

My clit grinder sex toy obsession is well-documented at this point. I think grinder toys are woefully underrated in general and deserve to be far more widely appreciated. So in that spirit, today’s buying guide is all about some of the best grinders currently on the market (in my opinion.)

What is a Clit Grinder and Who Is It For?

Godemiche Vibe Pads in "Jelly Bean" and "Ridges" textures

In a nutshell, a grinder or clit grinder is a toy designed to stimulate the clitoris and vulva when the user moves against it in a grinding motion. Grinder toys provide external stimulation that is highly customisable, because you can change the intensity, pressure, or focus of the stimulation just by shifting your position or weight distribution.

Grinder toys are amazing for anyone with a vulva and clit who enjoys external touch, though some folks with penises do also enjoy them. They are usually made of silicone, and come in a wide array of different shapes, sizes, textures, and designs. Most will be flat and smooth on one side, to allow you to place them face-up on a surface, with a raised and textured area on the other side.

Some grinder toys come with additional features, such as vibrating functionality, a hole for a penis or dildo to fit through, or straps so that you can attach the grinder to a surface.

About This List

Tentacle grinder from Uncover Creations in purple

Like all my buying guides, this post does not pretend to be a comprehensive list of all the amazing clit grinders that are available. There are hundreds if not thousands of these products on the market, and I have of course not tried them all. Therefore, please take this for what it is: a set of suggested products that I recommend and that may suit you, depending on your needs.

Everything listed here is from a manufacturer/retailer I trust, and links are affiliate links. This means that if you click on the links and make a purchase, I earn a small commission at no additional cost to you. I do not work for or claim to represent any of these companies, and any purchase you make is a contract with them and not with me.

Everything I recommend here is made of a body-safe material and is, to the best of my knowledge, safe for normal use. Where possible, I have tried to provide options at a range of price points. Products in lists are ordered from the cheapest to the most expensive.

Let’s dive in.

Best Single Texture Clit Grinder Toys

Godemiche Hearts Grind Ring with Lovehoney clitoral balm

Single-texture grinders are great to start with if you’re new to grinding toys. These toys offer a single, uniform texture ranging from very gentle to very intense.

For this purpose, I think the Godemiche Grind Pad is very hard to beat. With optional removeable straps and a choice of three available textures, there are numerous customisations you can make to get the perfect toy for you. Not sure where to start? Waves is the absolute best texture in my opinion. Or, of course, you can get a set of three to try all the textures!

None of these textures grabbing you? The Grind Ring range has even more options to choose from. Bubbles is great if you prefer a gentler sensation, and Tall Pyramids is a great choice if you want much more intensity.

Best Dual Texture Clit Grinder Toys

Godemiche dual texture clit grinder collection

Looking for something different or something a little more intense? If so, dual texture grinders can be a great choice. These toys combine two textures to create a different and more varied sensation than a single texture.

This is another Godemiche recommendation. I recently got to try their new Dual Texture Clit Grinder toys and they are just amazing. Again, there are numerous customisation options, from texture to height of the mound and even the level of softness or firmness you want.

Check out my review to help you choose the best options for you. Personally, I can’t get enough of the Bubbles and Bumps combo.

Best Fantasy Grinders

Meo's Scales dragon grinder fantasy sex toy from Nothosaur

Fantasy grinders tap into the same market as tentacle dildos, alien toys, and so on. They’re for anyone who has ever fantasised about having sex with a mystical creature (a much more common fetish than you might think!) I don’t personally have that kink, but I have found that fantasy grinders have some of the best textures out there due to their level of detailing.

For me, Uncover Creations is unbeatable in this regard. Their Tentacle Grinder II is one of the most-used toys in my collection, and is the closest a toy has ever come to making me feel like I was receiving cunnilingus from a partner. For those who prefer a gentler grinder, check out the Snystyl. And if you’re looking for all-over texture that’s so intense it’s almost overwhelming, the original Tentacle Grinder is a great choice.

Both Uncover Creations tentacle grinders are also available from Shevibe.

Another fantastic purveyor of fantasy grinders is Nothosaur. Their Meo’s Scales dragon grinder (pictured), in particular, is incredible and fast becoming a favourite.

Best Vibrating Grinders

Godemiche Vibe Pad hump toys with Rocks Off RO80 bullet vibrator

Vibrating clit grinders take the tried-and-true pleasure of vibrations and add them to grinding toys. Occasionally these are built-in, but more often they come in the form of a removeable bullet vibrator and a space to add it to the toy.

Many of Uncover Creations’ grinders can have a bullet vibrator added, and Godemiche’s Vibe Pad range is specifically designed with this in mind. There’s also the V-Plate add on, an optional extra which allows you to turn any Godemiche Grind Ring into a vibrating toy!

I find that vibrations work best on clit grinders that have a texture with more flexibility, as they allow it to “flutter”. I’ve particularly found that textures such as Uncover Creations’ Synstyl and Godemiche’s Spikes and Tall Pyramids work well with a vibrator.

Best Cock Ring Grinders

Godemiche Grind Ring silicone sex toy in Bubbles and Waves

Cock ring grinder toys come with a hole through which to put a penis (or a strap-on or dildo). The main idea is that they provide more pleasure for the receptive partner during penetrative penis-in-vagina sex.

Godemiche’s Grind Rings are, of course, the original and best cock ring clit grinder toys. However, another one I’ve tried recently is Uncover Creations’ Tentacle II cock ring, a smaller version of their amazing grinder I mentioned above (kindly sent to me by Shevibe!) There are also cock ring versions of the Synstyl and original Tentacle Grinders, though I haven’t tried these personally.

It can take a little practice to use a grinder cock ring effectively. You’ll need to experiment to figure out which positions and angles work best for you. In general, those with lots of close body contact tend to be easiest. You might also find that steadying the toy in place with your hand can help in some positions.

Pyramid Spikes and Tall Pyramids Grind Rings from Godemiche

I hope this guide to some of the best grinder toys on the market has been helpful! Drop me a line if you have any questions or if you have a suggestion for what buying guides you’d like me to do next.

Thanks to the manufacturers and retailers who sent me their various clit grinder toys to try, including Godemiche, Uncover Creations, Shevibe, and Nothosaur!

[Toy Review] Vibeology Aeronaut Mini Vibe

I don’t even know how many bullet vibrators I’ve tried at this point. They’re one of the most ubiquitous and popular sex toy models of all, and there must be thousands of variations on this theme on the market. Really good bullets, though? They’re much rarer. One such bullet vibrator landed in my review queue this week, though: Vibeology Aeronaut Mini Vibe.

What is the Vibeology Aeronaut?

Vibeology Aeronaut mini vibe black plastic bullet vibrator

The Vibeology Aeronaut is a bullet vibrator measuring 3.5″ in length and in the classic rounded-end shape. Its main body is made of ABS plastic, which is body-safe and non-porous as well as super easy to clean. The single button, located on the base, is made of silicone.

This toy is IPX7 waterproof, meaning it can be submerged in water for up to 30 minutes at a time. It is also USB rechargeable via the included magnetic cable. I got over an hour of use out of a full charge.

Vibeology Aeronaut Mini Bullet Vibrator Review: Pros

Fundamentally, the Vibeology Aeronaut Mini Vibe is simply a damn good basic bullet vibrator. Its vibrations are surprisingly strong for its small size and low price-point, and also much more rumbly than I expected. Since plastic transmits vibrations well with minimal dampening, I can really feel them throughout my entire clit and vulva.

Vibeology Aeronaut mini vibe black plastic bullet vibrator

The shape allows for both broader stimulation with the long edge, or more targeting with the rounded end. I also appreciate this toy’s clicky, easy-to-press button and light weight.

Vibeology Aeronaut Mini Bullet Vibrator Review: Cons

My only major complaint about the Vibeology Aeronaut is its single-button interface. I always prefer to be able to scroll both ways through patterns and speeds. The Aeronaut has 3 constant speeds and 7 patterns, so having to cycle through all of them is a bit annoying.

Vibeology Aeronaut mini vibe button close-up

One downside that is pretty consistent with bullet vibes I’ve reviewed is the transmission of vibrations into your hand, and the Aeronaut mini vibrator is no different. This tends to be more noticeable with plastic toys than silicone ones. It doesn’t bother me that much for short stints of use, but if you have pain or nerve issues in your hands it’s something to be aware of.

Aeronaut Mini Vibe: Verdict

If you’re looking for a good quality basic bullet with strong vibrations, particularly if you’re on a budget, the Vibeology Aeronaut is a fantastic pick. Considering its low price-point, I’m genuinely impressed at just how good this toy is.

The Aeronaut Mini Vibe retails for a super budget-friendly £19/$24.99.

Thanks to Shevibe for sending me the Vibeology Aeronaut mini bullet vibrator to test and review. All views and writing are mine, as always. Affiliate links appear in this post and using them helps to keep the blog going!

[Toy Review] The One Flicker Vibe

Following yesterday’s review of The One Wand vibrator, I’m back with the next installment in this series of toy reviews featuring new brand The One. In the UK, The One is exclusively available at Sex Toys UK. Elsewhere in the world, you can find these products at various toy retailers including Good Vibes and Babeland. Next up is The One Flicker Vibrator.

What is The One Flicker Vibrator?

The One Flicker Vibe tongue vibrator

The One Flicker Vibe is a curved toy measuring just under 10″ in length and 1.42″ in diameter at the widest point. Made of smooth body-safe silicone, it is also waterproof and USB rechargeable. A two-hour charge gives around 90 minutes of use.

The One Flicker Vibe a single-shaft vibrator with two independent motors. What makes this toy unique is its silicone “tongue” at one end, which flicks rapidly back and forth. The other end is a fairly standard insertable vibrator featuring a series of gentle ridges.

I admit I mostly requested this one for review out of curiosity. My initial reaction when I saw it was “what!? …huh.” But is it actually any good?

The One Flicker Sex Toy Review: Pros

Let’s get the most important thing out of the way: does it feel good? Surprisingly (to me at least), it does. The One Flicker Vibrator provides a rapid tapping sort of sensation against the G-spot, not unlike being fingered by someone with very good manual dexterity. As someone who doesn’t like the sensation of vibrations internally, this was a pleasant change: a motorised G-spot toy I can actually use and enjoy!

The One Flicker Vibe

So what else did I like about the One Flicker Vibe?

  • The curved shape makes the toy comfortable to insert and makes it effortless to find (and keep contact with) the G-spot.
  • The vibrating end has a half-decent motor. It’s not super rumbly, but it at least has some power behind it.
  • The two-in-one design means that, if you decide you’re in the mood for vibrations rather than flicking or vice-versa, you can just switch motors and turn it around without needing to grab a different toy.
  • It is comfortable to hold, with well-placed and easy to press buttons.
  • It works just as well for clitoral stimulation. I haven’t found that the flicking motion against my clit can actually get me off, but it does feel really fucking good.

The One Flicker Vibrator: Cons

This vibrator is really all about the flicker end for me. The regular vibrator end is fine, but not realistically something I’m likely to use with any kind of regularity.

The One Flicker Vibe G-spot vibrator end

There were also a few other gripes I had with this toy:

  • I don’t love the two-button interface. It’s good that you can control the flicker function and the vibrations separately, but makes it a pain to scroll through all the settings (three speeds and seven patterns per motor) to go backwards or find one you liked.
  • This toy is a nightmare to clean. It’s really hard to get around and behind the tongue to ensure it is completely clean. A very small brush that can get into all the crevices is probably your best bet.
  • It’s a little on the heavy side.

Also, I’m really annoyed that the copy on the box states you can use this toy for the “P-spot”, AKA the prostate. The Flicker Vibrator does not have a flared base and therefore absolutely should not be used anally.

Verdict

This toy offers quite a specific sensation, which is great if you enjoy it but pretty useless if you don’t. (Well, not completely useless. You can still use the vibrating end. But there are cheaper and better basic vibrators on the market if that’s what you’re looking for.)

If you want a toy that somewhat mimics the sensation of fingers making a “come hither” motion inside you (and/or tapping against your clit), you’ll probably enjoy this one. I certainly did.

The Flicker Vibe retails for £68.36 at Sex Toys UK and $117.95 at Babeland and Good Vibes.

Thanks to Sex Toys UK for sending me the One Flicker Vibrator to review. All views and writing are, as always, mine. If you shop through my affiliate links I make a small commission at no additional cost to you.